To Be With You
by Nokito-chan
Summary: How far is too far when you would do anything to be with the one you love? AU. NejiTen, SasuSaku. Please review!
1. Chapter 1

_**A/N: Okay, okay, I know, right? What the hell am I doing starting another story when I've got seriously involved ones like Precious Things waiting for me – but I really can't seem to stop the plot bunnies XD. This one is going to be a little different – it's AU and it's kind of a darkfic. Not to mention the crackishness that is going to happen, and the OOC-ness. LOL. The rating is M (as always with me) but this time not only for lemons but also for drug and alcohol abuse and language. So you have been warned, if any of the above bothers you I suggest you hit the back button – this fic is not for you! **_

_**Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto**_

* * *

_**To Be With You**_

_**Prologue:**_

"Oh god," Tenten moaned wantonly as Neji's hands slid slowly under her shirt to caress the quivering muscles of her stomach. She shook her head dazedly. How in the name of all things holy had she wound up making out with Hyuuga Neji in the supply closet? She was supposed to be in her math class not allowing him to ….

Neji swallowed her surprised squeal with his mouth as his left hand gently cupped her breast, his thumb stroking softly over the distended tip again. She could feel him smirking against her mouth, no doubt hoping for another surprised reaction, but she was damned if she'd allow him the upper hand so easily.

The problem was that this was exactly what she'd always wanted. Maybe not _exactly,_ since she'd had no idea of what to expect from physical intimacy of any sort until this moment, but if she _had_ known then this would've been exactly what she wanted.

A dull, far-off ringing penetrated the confused haze that surrounded her mind, and she pushed at Neji's shoulders. Reluctantly he drew back, his hands sliding over her skin in a last, lingering caress. Tenten stared up at him warily, unsure of what to say or do, but he leaned forward and licked at her bottom lip before trailing hot kisses sideways so he could whisper in her ear.

"I'll pick you up at eight."

Before Tenten had a chance to reply, or even drag her thoughts back to coherency, he had slipped out of the closet, leaving her to lean her trembling body against the wall as she wondered what on earth she'd gotten herself into now.

* * *

_**Chapter 1**_

Uchiha Sasuke groaned in frustration. The knocking at his front door just _would not stop_. He stared longingly at the half-finished joint in his hand before getting slowly to his feet. _Fuck it – guess it doesn't really matter._ He shrugged as he took another deep drag before stubbing the lit tip out in a nearby ashtray.

"All right! I'm coming!" he growled at the door when the knocking intensified. Even the calming, happy effect of the drug taking effect couldn't stop the flare of irritation from showing on his face when he yanked the door open.

"What?" he snapped, staring at the vaguely familiar girl on his doorstep. _Great work Uchiha. Real smart – open the door for the fangirls_. Sasuke stared at the small brunette expectantly. Finally her expression began to penetrate the pleasant fog surrounding his senses: she looked … kind of scared, a little sad, but mostly just pissed off.

With growing unease Sasuke scanned her features looking for any hint of recognition, just in case he was the object of her ire. Her heart-shaped face seemed almost all eyes. Chocolaty eyes framed with sooty lashes, and for a moment Sasuke was utterly entranced by the way the light reflected off the dark pools of her eyes, before his attention was caught by the shimmering pink of her lips as she spoke. He didn't hear a word. She shook her head impatiently, shoulder-length dark hair swinging in a silken cloud and Sasuke forced himself to concentrate.

"What?" he asked, stupidly but, hey, what else did she expect from an obviously trashed guy: rocket science?

"I need you to teach me to be bad." The girl repeated slowly, as if she was speaking to a total idiot, and Sasuke had to marvel at the thought that the girl – he still had no idea who she was – didn't realize that he was completely stoned. Could she honestly be that innocent – that she'd never seen anyone high and thus didn't recognize the effect? He shook his head again, and leaned a shoulder against the doorjamb, crossing his arms lazily. It was only then that he noticed the blonde that hovered just a few feet away from the brunette. This one he did recognize: the four pigtails, the glare … but what was Temari doing in front of his house in the middle of the night with an unknown girl who was asking him to teach her to be bad? It made no sense, but of one thing he was sure: Temari was a bitch who would as soon castrate him as ask him for a favor. Something was seriously off here.

He turned his gaze back to the brunette again, and this time with a focal point to start from he racked his brain for memories of her. Sasuke squinted at her … yes, if her hair was different … maybe up in two buns … if she wore less feminine clothes … no make-up … and he remembered. She was Temari's quiet little friend, a smart girl, a _good_ girl … now if only he could remember her name….

She waved her hand in front of his eyes, "Hello? Are you even listening to me?" she asked before turning incredulously to the girl behind her, throwing her hands up in a 'can-you-believe-this' sort of gesture. Temari stepped closer, staring into Sasuke's eyes intently before she sighed in disgust.

"He's high as a kite, Tenny. I doubt he'll be any good in this condition. Or _ever_. Now can we please abandon this ridiculous plan?" she grabbed the brunette's hand and turned to lead her away, but the girl called 'Tenny' pulled her arm away and stood her ground.

The gaze she leveled on Sasuke was unsure, and still a little scared as she also stared intently into his eyes, and Sasuke nearly laughed - as if she had any idea of what signs to look for.

"Tenten, right?" he said, at last latching on to the elusive name, and Tenten nodded slowly, hesitantly stepping closer again.

"And you want me to teach you how to be bad, is that it?" Sasuke smirked down at her, but her gaze hardened and she nodded emphatically, deliberately ignoring the despairing groan of the girl behind her.

"Why?" Sasuke asked, mildly curious.

"None of your business," Tenten said sharply, "Can you do it or not?"

Sasuke's smirk disappeared and he came out of his languid pose with startling grace, leaning closer to Tenten who could feel the fear crawling down her spine but she firmly met his obsidian gaze.

"Let me rephrase that question," Sasuke breathed, so close to her that the puffs of air brushed across her mouth, "I don't care why – I want to know what's in it for me?"

"You get the satisfaction of watching me totally and utterly humiliating Hyuuga Neji, knowing you had a hand in the process – he's not your favorite person last time I checked," Tenten paused and then added uncertainly, "and I guess I could, like, pay you or something. If you wanted."

This time Sasuke couldn't stop the bark of laughter from escaping, "I don't need your money, ridiculous girl," he said disdainfully, again fascinated by the play of light in her impossibly expressive eyes as she bristled up at him.

"But," Sasuke paused before deliberately drawing back to resume his previous pose, "you caught me on a good day – I'll help you purely for the satisfaction of watching the mighty Hyuuga fall from his perch. What makes you think you can accomplish that feat?"

"I have motive," Tenten forced the words out between clenched teeth, and abruptly Sasuke was just so incredibly tired of her and the tension that was vibrating the air around her – he was relaxed and wanted to stay that way. He pinched the bridge of his nose between thumb and forefinger and said, "Fine. Come over tomorrow night. Party. Nine. We'll see what you're capable of." He stepped back into his house, already closing the door on her surprised face when Temari's voice halted his actions.

"You're actually going to help her with this ridiculousness?" the blonde stared at him incredulously and Sasuke simply shrugged as he closed the door on the pair of them. _Blame it on the fact that I'm stoned_ he thought cynically as he headed back toward the unthinking haze that awaited him in an ashtray.

* * *

"Tenten. Please. Do not do this. I'm begging you!" Temari's voice pleaded from behind Tenten as she turned slowly from side to side in front of her full-length mirror. When no reply came, Temari sighed and fell back onto her friend's bed. "He's not worth this, Tenny! You're effectively selling your soul to the figurative devil – and all for what? To prove a point to Hyuuga Neji?"

At the name Tenten spun around, the black dress she was wearing swishing seductively around her thighs. "It's not about him, Temari! It's about my dignity, my pride! I was stupid, fine, I can admit that. I fell for his lines, that I can admit too. What I can't take is that I slept with him and he simply got up and walked away afterward, and hasn't said a word to me since! I can't stand the thought that he's smugly thinking he played me just like every other silly, naïve idiot he's ever gotten his hands on! I want him to be on the receiving end of that feeling for a change – it's the only way that I can ever look myself in the eye again!"

Temari sat up again, her expression laced with sympathy and Tenten quickly whirled back to the mirror so that she didn't have to see the pity emanating from her friend. "Tenny, I know it hurts. And I'm sorry that had to happen to you, but this isn't the way! Why do you need Sasuke to accomplish that?"

Taking a deep breath Tenten said over her shoulder, "Because the only way I'm ever going to get Neji's attention again is if I'm in his face the whole time – meaning I have to travel in his social circle, and for that I need Sasuke."

The silence from the blonde on the bed only confirmed to Tenten that she was entirely right: the only way for her to gain access to Neji's sphere of existence was through the Uchiha. Her thoughts were interrupted by Temari's presence at her shoulder.

"They're not like you, Tenny. You can't handle them. You're everything they're not! You're not an arrogant, hedonistic, trust-fund brat more concerned with partying than anything else. You don't know what you're getting into."

"And you do?! Who made you the expert?" Tenten almost immediately reached a contrite hand out to Temari – the words had been unnecessary, Temari was only trying to keep her best interests at heart, but this was one time that Tenten was determined to not back off. Ever.

"I may not be an expert, but I've seen enough of that kind of life to know that I want no part of it," Temari stated quietly, "I live with Gaara, remember? I have first-hand experience of having to go and drag him from some drug-infested, drunken orgy in the early hours of the morning, because the police called and my dad made it my and Kankurou's problem."

"Shikamaru's friends with them," Tenten returned sulkily, unwilling to let the truth of Temari's words shake her resolve. Temari shook her head exasperatedly, "Yes, fine, my boyfriend occasionally parties with them. But, the difference is, he knows how to handle it – and he doesn't go as far as most of the others do. What are you going to do if a drunk and/or high Sasuke suddenly decides that he deserves a more carnal form of repayment for his help? What if some other idiot decides to slip you a date rape drug or something? Do you honestly imagine that Uchiha will care or even notice? He's not going to protect you, Tenny!"

Tenten whirled around again, glaring at her friend, "That's just it! I'm tired of needing protection! I'm tired of being sweet, good, little Tenten – and thanks for the vote of confidence by the way! You just assume that I'm so useless that I'm just going to hang around patiently waiting to be taken advantage of?! I do have _some _common sense, Temari!"

A long silence descended as the two girls stared at each other, engaged in a silent battle of wills. Finally Temari sighed and reached over to smooth a strand of dark hair off of Tenten's forehead before drawing the other girl into a tight hug.

"You're good, pure, innocent, trusting and I just don't want to see you corrupted," she drew back, "so if this is really what you want and then I'll call Shikamaru and we'll go with you, all right?"

Tenten smiled sadly back at her friend, "No so innocent anymore," she said softly, "but it would be great if I had back-up the first time around." She squeezed Temari's hand tightly as the latter drew her cell phone from her pocket and, with a reluctant sigh, phoned her boyfriend.

* * *

The Uchiha mansion's grounds were overflowing with parked cars, various groups of people dotted here and there, and Tenten had to admit that she was incredibly grateful to have Shikamaru and Temari with her as they navigated the gravel of the drive to reach the open front door.

Temari was shooting haughty, distrustful looks at everyone she saw but that wasn't so different – even in a school filled with rich, bored, spoiled kids Temari managed to be a bigger snob than Tenten had ever imagined anyone being. Shikamaru nodded lazy greetings as they passed various groups of people, but Tenten only vaguely recognized some of them.

They entered the crowded foyer, the blasting music vibrating through her body, and she turned around searching for the host. The tension of the situation was getting to her, and she jumped when a hand clamped down on her shoulder, whirling around only to exhale in relief when she saw Shikamaru staring quizzically at her. He jerked his head toward the left, and Tenten took the lead when they walked into living room.

"Well, well, well. What do we have here?"

Tenten jumped again when Inuzuka Kiba threw a drunken arm around her shoulders. But she resisted the urge to push him away, and smiled tightly. They were lab partners after all and she didn't want to spend the rest of the year listening to his snide remarks because she wounded his pride by showing how disgusted she was by the alcohol on his breath, and the weight of his body against hers.

"Hi, Kiba," she mouthed instead, trying to wriggle away surreptiously but Kiba was having none of that. His hand tightened around her shoulders and he leered at her, eyes going directly to her breasts. "Never would've expected to see _you _partying with us. Or looking so hot."

Tenten couldn't help the blush that spread over her cheeks as he insolently gave her the once over. Before she could begin to formulate a suitable reply – that would spare his ego, and yet make it perfectly clear that she wasn't interested – a dark voice spoke in her ear. "So you actually came."

Thankfully Kiba let go of her to stare at the Uchiha who had materialized behind them in surprise, but Tenten most definitely didn't like the smirk she could hear in his voice. She turned around, steeling her gaze, "You doubted it? I was serious."

Sasuke stared at Tenten and Tenten stared at Sasuke until Kiba cleared his throat nervously and opened his mouth before closing it with a snap and disappearing into the crowd shaking his head. Sasuke broke eye contact first, his gaze flickering to Temari and Shikamaru, the former hovering protectively while the latter traced soothing patterns on the nape of her neck – not that it was having much effect.

"Being bad with bodyguards?" Sasuke smirked at Tenten again, and she bristled. "No, I don't need them to watch over me," she snarled back, stung into a flare of temper by the condescension in his dark eyes. He eyed her speculatively, "Last chance to back out," he said warningly, and held out a hand.

Without hesitation Tenten took his hand, and he raised an eyebrow at her but only said, "Where we're going they can't come," jerking his head at Shikamaru and Temari. Turning slightly Tenten gave her blonde friend a reassuring yet hard stare until the blonde huffed and leaned forward for a quick hug, "Keep your cell with you at all times – I'm only a phone call away."

Tenten nodded and allowed Sasuke to pull her through the crowd, back into the foyer. She followed him silently through the kitchen and down into the basement. It was a lot quieter down here, a lot more comfortable, with black leather couches grouped around a flat screen, a pool table, and a glass bar in the corner.

Her gaze flicked over the occupants of the large room, noting that this appeared to be a private party within the larger party – this one solely for the inner circle. Naruto looked pained, he was trying to keep an extremely drunk Sakura from falling over, as she called for her boyfriend, Sai, who was nowhere to be seen. Tenten shot him a small smile that he returned distractedly, and Tenten relaxed somewhat: it was a well-known fact that Naruto did not approve of his friends' activities but that he hung around regardless – trying to keep them from trouble.

Shifting her eyes, she took in the sight of Shino hunched over the entertainment center looking for a song to play. Kiba's eyes lit up and Tenten nearly groaned out loud, so this was where he'd disappeared to. She quickly skipped her gaze away, only to connect with Neji's as he lounged in a dark corner of one couch, Gaara next to him. They were sharing a cigarette of some kind – and Tenten highly doubted that it contained anything even remotely legal. His empty eyes held no emotion whatsoever and Tenten quickly glanced away – pretending not to have seen him.

A loud squeal nearly deafened Tenten as a blonde whirlwind threw herself at Sasuke. Tenten couldn't help it – she recoiled slightly from Ino's exuberant (and alcohol drenched) form as the girl latched onto Sasuke's arm. He simply gave her a freezing look that she returned with a pout before flouncing off to join the red-headed Karin at a bar where the other Sasuke-obsessed girl was clearly drowning her sorrows, if the injured look she gave Sasuke was any indication.

Tenten shuddered, and Sasuke smirked again, "Still sure you want to enter this world of depravity?" he asked, his voice heavy with irony. Tenten nodded – again stung into replying when she really wasn't sure if this was a good idea anymore.

Sasuke tugged at her hand and led her into a dark corner away from everyone else. He backed her against the wall – not touching her – but shielding her from everyone's view. Slowly, his gaze travelled up and down her body until Tenten could feel the flush on her cheeks burning like the midday sun.

Abruptly, Sasuke grabbed a handful of the gauzy outer layer of her black dress and, with almost surgical precision he ripped the fabric away from her body. The unexpectedness of the action caught Tenten by surprise – she forgot to be afraid - as his gaze raked her critically again. The removal of the outer part had left her in the tube-like inner layer. The stretchy fabric barely covered her breasts and only came down to just below her ass, but Sasuke nodded in approval. "Better," he announced.

Disbelievingly Tenten arched her eyebrows at him, "Don't you mean sluttier?" she asked acerbically. Sasuke shrugged, "One and the same in this world – get used to it."

Without any further ado he hurried her over to the bar, and motioned to a bottle behind the blank-eyed, tuxedoed barman, who immediately poured a shot of the colorless liquor into a glass and placed it in front of Tenten.

"What's this?" she asked Sasuke suspiciously, and he sighed. "Tequila," he answered briefly, clearly irritated by her question, "Drink. You need to relax."

Dutifully Tenten raised the glass to her lips and took a small sip, only to grimace at the taste. Sasuke stared at her incredulously, before he motioned for another glass. His movements were exaggerated when he lifted the glass in her direction before downing the shot, and staring at her expectantly.

_Oh, _Tenten thought, mildly irritated by his condescension, but she picked her glass up again and followed Sasuke's example – only to choke as the liquor burned a path down to her stomach where it settled uncomfortably. Soon the burning subsided and Tenten had successfully overcome the urge to throw it all back up again, the pleasant warmth spreading through her body reflected in the relaxed pose she took up, leaning half against Sasuke, half against the bar.

Staring down at her with vague amusement Sasuke had to concede that maybe corrupting Tenten was going to be more fun than he'd thought – her reactions really were quite funny. His musings were interrupted by his brother's entrance, followed by a few of his friends, and Sasuke grimaced as he quickly moved to stand closer to Tenten.

"What are you doing?" she asked him, a flush on her cheeks, and Sasuke nearly kicked himself for allowing her to start off with something like tequila – but how was he supposed to have known that she'd never had alcohol before?

Silently he jerked his head to the group at the door, "College guys," he stated succinctly and Tenten nodded slowly, not quite getting what he meant but not wanting to appear like any more of an idiot than she already did.

A long suffering sigh broke the quiet and Sasuke dragged her back to their corner, pushing her into the armchair that rested there before making himself comfortable on the armrest. "We need to get some things straightened out," he announced glaring down at her, "Just exactly how much experience have you had with anything you've seen here tonight?"

The blush was a dead giveaway and Sasuke sighed again, "God," he raked a hand through his already messy hair, "Okay, fine, define this 'badness' you want?"

Her gaze met his squarely but her voice was a tad husky when she replied, "I want to be like you." His eyes narrowed, she could almost see the fire burning in his gaze and his voice was low when he replied, "No, you don't. You don't know the first thing about being like me – or anyone else here tonight. And I think you should keep it that way. Go home, Tenten." He stood but her hand shot out to grab his wrist pulling him back down.

"No, please, you don't understand," she said pleadingly, "I have to."

Sasuke crossed his arms, "Explain." He demanded, but Tenten hesitated nonetheless. She was fairly sure that Neji had wasted no time in telling his friends about their little escapade but she still didn't want it all over school! Suddenly she decided to trust Sasuke – if he was going to introduce her to all of this then she had to, right? Or maybe it was just the alcohol that lowered her inhibitions but Tenten found herself opening her mouth and telling Sasuke exactly why she was in this position.

" I slept with Neji," she stated and watched the understanding dawning in his eyes. "He took your virginity, pulled a typical Neji disappearing act, and now you want to get back at him," Sasuke sighed again, "Look, I get that, but I don't see how corrupting you further is going to solve the problem for you. The deeper you get, the harder it is to get out," he added with a contempt-filled glance around the room.

"I'm already corrupted," Tenten said, bitterly, reaching for the glass of whiskey in Sasuke's hand. She took a long swig, only to have the drink pulled away. "Watch it. You're not used to alcohol – you'd better start with something a little less potent."

Staring up at Sasuke with hopeful eyes Tenten allowed him to take his drink back, "Does that mean you'll still help me?" she asked, and Sasuke stared at her searchingly. He took note of the resolve that shielded the hurt in her eyes and stifled the groan he felt welling up in him. How the hell had he managed to be the lucky one she approached with her ridiculous idea? Still, he couldn't shake the feeling that if he didn't help her then she would go to someone else and god knew what would happen to her then. Much as Sasuke hated to admit it, in this particular instance, _she_ was lucky that she'd latched onto him – he was one of the good guys. It was a fucked-up code of honor he lived by, true enough, but it was still there, and she would be safer with him than with say … Kiba. Sasuke rubbed at a temple and glared down at the hope-filled girl, "You are completely insane, you don't know what you're getting into, but maybe tonight is exactly the wake up call you need," he ground out before handing her the glass of whiskey again, motioning for her to drink.

Over the rim of the glass Tenten gave him a grateful look, and Sasuke turned away in disgust. She had no idea how precious the naïveté she possessed was. Grimly, he decided to show her exactly what she was getting into – maybe she'd use her head and get the hell out when she woke up feeling like shit tomorrow, barely able to remember what she'd done.

* * *

_**A/N: Since finishing Mismatched and Messed-up (and since there were so many votes for SasuTen throughout that fic) I've wanted to try my hand at this crack pairing. BUT I'm leaving it up to the readers: let me know which pairing you want to happen: NejiTen or SasuTen. If you don't let me know then I'm going to let the story flow and then no one is allowed to get mad at me for the way it turns out, k? K. =D**_

_**Now: REVIEW!!!**_

_**~Nokito**_


	2. Chapter 2

_**A/N: Thanks for the reviews/alerts/favorites everyone ^^ I figure the votes are in – any more will just widen the gap more … SO … by a fairly wide margin, I might add, the winner is NejiTen ^^ A word of warning though, this is not a fluffy fic … let's leave it at that for now =D**_

_**The same warnings as in the first chapter apply though nothing terribly explicit has happened as yet. **_

_**Don't forget to review ^^ … it makes me happy! Also any suggestions/requests … let me know and I'll try to work it in!**_

_**Disclaimer: IDNON (like that was ever up for debate)**_

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_**Chapter 2**_

Tenten swayed her hips to the beat of the song and Sasuke leaned his head back against the couch, allowing his gaze to travel over Tenten's body as he exhaled another cloud of the only form of relaxation he dared indulge in tonight – he couldn't afford to be so out of it that he wasn't aware of his surroundings anymore – or to be more precise Tenten's surroundings. For the umpteenth time he kicked himself for getting involved in this.

His gaze slid sideways to Neji's profile – the Hyuuga had barely taken his eyes off the dancing girls for the last hour and Sasuke knew that his gaze was focused far more on Tenten than the others. _Probably contemplating his chances for a second round_, he thought derisively. But deep down he understood the jaded need to experience something that wasn't tainted. Something wholesome and pure: a breath of fresh air. The only problem was that, for guys like them, there wasn't a way to _not_ spoil that innocence, and once the innocence was gone, you found that the mixed feelings you had about it were just too much trouble: half-hating yourself for corrupting something so sweet, and half-wanting to finish the job, but being unable to proceed because then you removed the one memory of something good that you had to cling to. Oh yes, he understood that all too well. Look where Sakura had ended up.

Sasuke shook his head to dislodge the thoughts and, when Tenten's eye caught his, he motioned her over. She sank down next to him, panting lightly, and Sasuke tried to focus, "You should probably be going," he said finally, having forgotten what he'd motioned her over for in the first place. She giggled and Sasuke winced – he hated giggles.

"Silly Sasuke – don't you remember?" she asked, leaning back against the couch next to him, and reaching for the joint he held which Sasuke promptly held out of her reach. She pouted at him before continuing, "It's like 3 am, Sasuke. Remember? Mari and Shika came looking for me at twelve and you told them to go, that I could stay here."

Frantically Sasuke racked his brain, trying to remember why on earth he would've done something like that – but then it was just ridiculously funny: this had to be the first time in history that an Uchiha had a girl stay over with absolutely no intention of taking advantage of her. Sasuke choked and leaned forward to muffle his laughter.

Tenten leaned forward to try and see but he buried his face in his hands so she couldn't see the laughter he suddenly had no control over. Sasuke felt her move away and leaned back slightly keeping his hands over his face to muffle the sounds, only to jerk in shock – laughter forgotten – when she suddenly slid her body between his thighs. His hands fell as he stared down at the girl who was angling her head, first to one side then the other, as she tried to catch a glimpse of his face. Her hands rested on his hips, her breasts pressed against his insides of his legs, and abruptly there was nothing funny in the situation at all as he fought against the urge to bury a hand in her hair and drag her toward the part of his body that was suddenly aching for attention.

Thankfully Itachi's voice dragged him back to sanity, "None of that," his brother called from across the room, throwing a martini olive at Sasuke's head and missing by a mile, "you know the rules, little brother. Get a room – I don't want to see you getting head, thanks very much."

Instinctively Sasuke's head swiveled to take note of Tenten's reaction, he was sure that she would be appalled by his brother's vulgarity, but the girl simply stared at him before turning her gaze to Itachi, a quizzical expression knitting her brow. _God, she really has no clue. _

Making a face at Itachi Sasuke stood, dragging Tenten with him, and they stumbled a little as both searched for secure footing. Taking her hand, and suddenly savagely satisfied by the glare Hyuuga directed in his direction, Sasuke pulled Tenten along in his wake – they both needed fresh air before the situation got any more out of hand.

* * *

Her entire body felt like one big bruise, her head ached abominably, nausea roiled in her stomach, and she'd never felt this dirty in her entire life. Tenten carefully turned onto her other side, and shrieked when she came face to face with a sleeping Sasuke. Quickly clamping a hand over her mouth, she winced at the uncomfortable way her head swayed with the motion, but thankfully the sounds were muffled.

She took stock of her surroundings. She was in a bedroom she'd never seen before but assumed belonged to Sasuke, she was wearing absolutely nothing - not a single stitch - and she was too afraid to try and check if Sasuke was in the same state of undress. He was certainly shirtless, that much she could see. Frantically Tenten tried to remember what had happened. She remembered going to the party, remembered saying goodbye to a bristling Temari, who was being dragged away by Shikamaru before she could create any more of a scene, and she remembered all the drinks in between. But after that came a great, big blank filled with various flashes of memory that she couldn't be sure were real.

Vaguely she recalled dancing, sure that Neji was watching and trying her utmost to be as sexy as possible, even more vaguely she remembered an indoor pool – with lovely heated water – and as she strained to remember she became aware of the raw ache in her throat. The pain brought back some more memories – snippets of it: Sasuke finally allowing her to try whatever it was he'd been smoking all night, and the resulting coughing fit. But try as she might, she could not remember going to bed with Sasuke. In any sense. But, right now, she didn't trust her memory.

Tenten moved with bated breath, trying to inch farther away from the sleeping boy, but the sheet was stuck – one side wedged firmly around Sasuke's waist, and if she tugged too hard he would wake up. A little more pressure convinced Tenten to stop wriggling. As she lay there she became aware of the terrible thirst, it overcame even her desire for clothes, and she started to pull at the sheet again, only to shriek when Sasuke spoke.

"Stop that, and, for fuck's sake, keep it down!" he snarled without opening his eyes. Tenten froze and finally Sasuke sighed heavily, raised a hand to rub over his face before running it back up to comb through his messy bangs, and letting it rest above his head as he stretched slightly. Tenten blushed. _You are naked, in the guy's bed, after having sex with him probably, and yet the sight of his _chest _embarrasses you?_

Sasuke groaned, "Could you relax? I can feel the tension radiating off you – trust me, it's not going to help with the hangover you've got." He finally cracked an eye open to peer blearily at her, and Tenten couldn't help the reflexive reaction: she tightened the sheet around her body. Sasuke smirked, "Nothing I haven't seen before," he drawled and Tenten stared at him in horror – did that mean they had … done _that_.

Blood-shot onyx eyes met frightened hazel ones until Sasuke sighed and turned his back to her, "Relax. I'm not into rape – and anyway, I could've had my wicked way with you at any time during the night and you wouldn't even have noticed, you were so out of it …" the sentence trailed off into a mumble as he slowly pushed himself into a sitting position and Tenten couldn't help the squeak that escaped as she squeezed her eyes tightly shut.

There was a rustle of cloth, an almost amused grunt, and then Sasuke's voice sounded, "You can look, you know."

Gathering all her courage Tenten slowly opened her eyes. To her relief Sasuke was wearing pants – very wrinkled pants that bore all the signs of having been slept in. Her gaze swept up his body to meet eyes that were simmering with cynical laughter.

"Never fails," Sasuke muttered to himself as he turned away and scooped a shirt off the floor, "eyes straight to the pants." He shook his head slightly and tossed the shirt over his shoulder at Tenten. "Wear that, I have no idea where your clothes are."

Tenten gratefully grabbed at the shirt, and pulled it below the covers, trying to get it on as quickly as possible without losing her grip on the sheet. "What happened?" she gasped when she finally emerged again, "I mean, how did I wind up in here?'

Sasuke paused at the door, turned, and gave her an unreadable look before facing the door again, "You're _here_ because if I'd put you in one of the guest bedrooms you would have had unwanted visitors and you weren't in any state to know what you were doing. How you're naked and where your clothes are – no idea. I went to the bathroom, came back, and there you were in all your glory."

It felt as if ever cell in her body was shriveling up into little balls of mortification and Tenten was thankful that Sasuke had kept his back turned throughout the little recital. His hand reached for the doorknob and he continued, "Tell me – being bad all you thought it would be?"

And he headed through the door without another word, waving a hand behind him to indicate that she should follow.

* * *

The shirt thankfully came down almost to her knees but Tenten was still horribly aware of her unclothed state as she ghosted silently after Sasuke through the hallways and down the stairs. Everywhere were signs of a rough night, and Tenten continually had to place a hand on the wall to steady herself and fight against the rising nausea and light-headedness.

Finally Sasuke walked through an archway and into the dining-room where the table was already laid with various breakfast dishes. Despite the nausea Tenten stared longingly at the bacon and toast before hesitantly sitting down next to Sasuke and following his example in helping herself.

"Who made breakfast?"she asked at last, awkwardly aware of the silence, as Sasuke stared broodingly into his coffee.

He shrugged carelessly, and Tenten fell silent, staring at her toast, until he spoke again. "Have you given up on being bad yet? Was last night enough to show you that you'd be far better off returning to your safe, innocent little world?"

The undertones in his voice made her frown but at that moment more people stumbled in through the doors: Itachi, one of his friends – Deidara she thought he was called – Sakura, Sai, Naruto, Ino, and to her unending horror, Neji and Kiba. Instinctively Tenten tried to curl into as inconspicuous a bundle as she could, her face flaming, but she didn't miss the look Neji shot at Sasuke, or the blank stare the Uchiha gave in return.

Silence reigned as everyone helped themselves to something to eat, but soon laughter rang through the room as they began rehashing the events of the previous evening. Tenten kept her head down, picking at the toast she no longer had any appetite for. She listened quietly to the ebb and flow of conversation around her and she felt the bile rise in her throat when she registered the fact that Neji was taunting Sasuke about his 'taste for leftovers'.

Sasuke stared at Neji for a minute, dark eyes unreadable and then he smirked, "Corrupting is always fun – especially if I can rectify previous … misconceptions … along the way."

Neji glowered at Sasuke, clearly not appreciating the implication that his performance with Tenten had been anything less than satisfactory. The rest of the table were staring quizzically from one to the other, but Tenten soon came to the conclusion that this kind of behavior was normal for Neji and Sasuke and she forced herself to relax and look Neji boldly in the eye. This was what she'd gone through all this for after all.

She was so caught up in trying to look unfazed that she jumped when Sasuke stood and grabbed her upper arm, roughly pulling her to her feet, and dragged her after him without a word to anyone.

"Let's find your clothes and then you can get your friends to come and get you or something. Just … don't talk to me right now – thanks to you everyone now thinks that I had to settle for Hyuuga's cast-offs."

Sasuke glared at her and Tenten meekly dropped her eyes to her feet as she followed along. They finally found her shredded dress in the pool, and Tenten couldn't help the cry of dismay at the sight of the wet garment. "That's great – just fucking fantastic," she swore, kicking out toward a ball lying on the paving next to the pool with a violent motion.

The snort from Sasuke behind her really wasn't helping her temper but she gritted her teeth and reminded herself that she was the one who was indebted to him and that she couldn't afford to piss him off. Finally he sighed, "Come on. I'll lend you some sweats or something. You can get girl clothes that fit better from Temari to go home in."

* * *

Tenten waited on Sasuke's bed as he rummaged through drawers looking for something that would even remotely fit. As he searched she stared at the floor, contemplating whether this idea still had any chance of working.

"Just how did getting totally wasted and passing out in my bed get back at Hyuuga?" Sasuke's voice broke through her reverie and she glanced up in surprise. Grabbing at the black fabric he held out to her she snapped, "It doesn't. But the fact that you implicated that I …" her voice trailed off as she searched for a suitable euphemism that wouldn't make her blush, she didn't need any more embarrassment in front of the Uchiha. "That is, the fact that you…" she tried again, and cursed inwardly at the blush that rose. She could hear the dry humor in Sasuke's voice when he supplied the words she couldn't find.

"Fucked you senseless? Had you screaming my name when he couldn't get that kind of reaction?" Sasuke suggested, and Tenten's last shred of endurance dissipated. "I doubt either of you could ever accomplish that," Tenten hissed, standing and stalking into the bathroom to dress without a backward glance.

Once she'd regained her composure she took a deep breath and decided to face Sasuke again. Before he could say anything she started, "Look. The plan is to make him want me like he's never wanted anyone or anything before and then leave him hanging for a change. To do that I need your help. That much is obvious after last night. And, I'm sorry if this is rude, but if last night is your idea of teaching someone something then your definition of teaching needs some work."

His eyebrows rose and after a long moment of silence Sasuke finally replied, "Fine. I didn't try last night because I think you should abandon this half-assed plan of yours but if you really want to fuck up your entire life then I'll teach you." The phone on his bedside table buzzed and Sasuke picked it up, listened for a moment before hanging up and turning back to Tenten.

"Your ride's here, and she doesn't sound very happy," Tenten grimaced but Sasuke had already pushed her through the door, "We begin tonight."

With those ominous words ringing in her ears Tenten made her way downstairs and to the front-door where Temari was waiting, not really in the mood for either her friend or the evening that lay ahead.

* * *

The silence was deafening as Temari drove slowly down the winding driveway, the Uchiha mansion fading from view behind them. Finally, Tenten took a deep breath, "Sorry," she said softly.

Her friend's hands clenched around the steering-wheel, knuckles turning white from the pressure she exerted. At last Temari responded, "For which part?" she asked with deceptive politeness, "The part where you disappear and don't answer your cell phone? Or the part where you got drunk and refused to leave? Oh, no wait, I know - you're sorry about the part where I have to come pick you up, wearing _Sasuke's clothes_, your own nowhere to be seen, right? Everything else is okay, so long as Tenten's pride doesn't suffer," the blonde finished sarcastically without looking at the shamefaced girl next to her.

"Everything," Tenten whispered, "I'm sorry for everything."

Temari's hands relaxed their grip somewhat, and she finally deigned to look at Tenten, "Why Sasuke too, Ten? Wasn't Neji bad enough?"

Tenten's head jerked up, "No, you've got it all wrong. I didn't sleep with Sasuke – well I _did_ – but not in the way you mean."

Skeptical blonde eyebrows rose, "Really? Okay, fine, if you say so. Care to explain where your clothes are?"

The blush wouldn't be contained, and Tenten winced slightly, "Um … I don't really know," she admitted at last.

"Okay, you know what – I don't want to know," Temari said, anger flaring in her voice again, "Just, at least, tell me that you've seen how bad this plan is and that you've decided to abandon it."

When Tenten remained silent, Temari glanced at her friend again but Tenten was studiously staring out the window, avoiding her gaze. "God," Temari groaned, "Why, Ten? Why are you so hell-bent on destroying yourself?"

Though she'd meant the question to be rhetorical, Tenten replied anyway, "Because if I don't then I'll always live with the shame of having been used – I need to make that go away, I need to have something to counteract that feeling. You don't know what it's like to know that you weren't good enough for anything but a quick fuck! So don't you dare judge me," Tenten's voice was low, and Temari saw the faint trace of wetness in her eyes before she turned away again, but it was the unusual crudeness of the words that convinced her more than anything that Tenten wasn't about to back down from her schemes.

Reaching silently for her friend's hand Temari gave it a quick squeeze, "I know, but I think there are better ways to overcome that than this."

Tenten yanked her hand away, "Temari. I'm a big girl, and I can take care of myself. You're not my mother so stop trying to act like it – I understand that you can't deal with this situation and I'm sorry that I involved you in it at all. Don't worry – you won't have to be involved in future."

"Not what I meant and you know it! I know that I can't order you to do anything but I'm warning you, Tenten, if it looks like the situation is getting out of hand then I _will _call your father," Temari's voice was hard but nonetheless she steeled herself for Tenten's reaction.

"You wouldn't!" her friend gasped, and Temari nodded grimly, "Oh yes I would. Your mother and stepfather may not care what you do or where you go, but I know that your dad does – you know as well as I do that if his job allowed him to settle in any one place then you would be living with him, and none of this would've happened."

"That's beside the point and below the belt anyway!" Tenten shrieked.

"Then see to it that it doesn't need to happen," was all Temari said, and Tenten could see in the set of her friend's shoulders that she was determined on this course of action. _Great. More secrets._

* * *

Sasuke was as bad as his word, and when he picked Tenten up that evening, she was only semi-prepared. He gave her leggings and long top a disdainful once over, snorted, and turned to go. Caught between the urge to bash him over the head and slam the door behind him, she stood frozen: how the hell was she supposed to look the part if he didn't so much as give her the time of his arrival, never mind telling her where he was taking her?

Halfway down the path Sasuke paused, turned, and raised his eyebrows. "Coming? Or have you realized the insanity of what you're doing?"

For some reason the way that Sasuke spoke to her always got under her skin – made her react without thought, in a never-ending bid to show him that she wasn't the milksop he clearly thought her. Raising her chin defiantly, she grabbed the keys off the hall table, and followed him out into the night.

"Won't your parents wonder where you'd gotten to?" Sasuke asked, as he waited for her to lock up. "No," Tenten said briefly, and Sasuke shrugged when it became apparent that she had no intention of elaborating on the topic.

In the car he leaned over, uncomfortably close – she still hadn't really recovered from the embarrassment of that morning – and rummaged around in the back seat. Shaking his hair out of his eyes he finally drew back and shoved a shopping bag at her. "Good thing I came prepared – wear that," he announced, starting the car.

Curiously Tenten opened the bag, shooting a quick glance at Sasuke when he reached overhead to turn on the light so she could see clearly. At last she decided against thanking him and merely drew the dark red fabric out of the bag, holding it up in front of her to get the full effect.

Her eyes widened, "I am _not _wearing that," she stated, disbelief and embarrassment making her voice higher than it already was. Sasuke shot her an unreadable look, "It's no more revealing than what you were prancing around in last night," he replied lazily.

And indeed, the skirt was no shorter than the one she'd worn the night before – though that had hardly been her choice: Sasuke had effectively removed the outer covering that she relied on for modesty – but this skirt flared, the slightest movement would allow the silky fabric to flounce away from her body, and Tenten shuddered to think of how she'd be flashing everyone all night if she wore the thing. Her gaze shifted to the top: thin spaghetti straps covered the shoulders, but the neckline plunged down to the navel, and there was just no way she was walking around in public barely dressed. It didn't help that the material of the dress was very light, very silky, and the cut also wouldn't allow her to wear a bra at all.

"No," she said firmly, but Sasuke simply smirked at her until she glanced away, crumpling the fine material between clenched fingers. "Fine," Sasuke shrugged as if it was of no interest to him what she wore, "Just don't let anyone see you came with me, and then you can get a cab back home once we get there."

Her eyebrows nearly touched her hairline, "Are you saying that unless I wear this you won't let me come with you tonight?"

Dark hair briefly veiled his face as he shook his head, "No. I'm saying that if you want to be bad, and you want me to teach you, then you'd better get used to doing as I say. I'm giving you one final out but if you come tonight then understand the fact that from here on out I _own_ you."

She could only gape at him, her expression clearly showing what she thought of that statement, but Sasuke turned into an underground parking area and smoothly parked the car in the shadow of a pillar before turning to look at her. "Last chance, Tenten. Is revenge important enough to you?" he asked cryptically.

They stared at each other for a long moment before Tenten dropped her head in defeat, kicked off her shoes and prepared to climb into the back seat to get dressed. Sasuke's hand shot out, "No, stay where you are – I've already seen it all anyway."

Her cheeks burned and she knew he was deliberately humiliating her, just to prove his power over her, but the desperation to feel clean again, to exorcise Neji from her system as it were, to have something to drown out the shame she felt whenever she thought of her stupidity, won out and she gave him a cold stare before pulling her shirt over her head.

* * *

Tenten walked aimlessly through the crowded bar area still uncomfortably aware of all the skin she was baring. Though she had to admit the dress fit like it had been made for her – how Sasuke had guessed that it would fit was beyond her but her fears that she would look like a streetwalker had dissipated once she'd seen her reflection in the full-length mirror of the club's bathroom. It was slutty, there was just no way around that … but it was slutty in a sophisticated and sexy way, and Tenten made a mental note to compliment Sasuke on his taste in woman's clothing. The thought of his expression at the implication that he was drag-queen material made her smirk: he may think he had the upper hand but there was no way she was going to let him completely cow her. They'd entered the club and he'd waved her in the direction of the bar, telling her to entertain herself, since he had business to take care of, and that had been hours ago.

Tenten was bored. She turned, deciding that she did want a drink after all – a proper one – and that Sasuke would pay for it to make up for leaving her alone, and she headed toward the VIP room where she'd last seen him. To her intense dismay Neji exited the room just as she was making her way up the steps toward the entrance.

_No, not now! I'm not ready yet! _But it was too late to turn and disappear into the crowd – Neji had seen her, if the smirk that pulled at his lips was anything to go by. For some reason, that smirk sent cold shivers down Tenten's spine.

She turned and immediately began to make her way down the stairs, uncaring of whether he thought she was running away. Unfortunately she was unused to maneuvering steep stairs in heels – Sasuke had thoughtfully provided shoes as well, and it _was _kind of creepy how he knew so much about what sizes she wore – while trying to keep her skirt down, and Neji caught her with ridiculous ease.

Her back connected with his hard chest and his hands ran up and down her stomach in an insolent caress, his fingertips just brushing the underside of her breasts on the upward stroke, and the tops of her thighs on the downward stroke. Tenten stiffened automatically but, recognizing the fact that she was not getting free unless he wanted to let her go, she forced herself to stand still. She succeeded in pretending that he wasn't even there until his tongue touched the sensitive spot just below her ear, a slow taste, before he scraped his teeth along the lobe.

"Let's go get a drink," his voice sounded in her ear, his breath brushing against her skin, and Tenten tried her utmost to suppress the shivers that ran down her spine, uncomfortably aware that she was unsuccessful and that Neji had noticed – she could feel him smirking against her neck. For a moment she reflected on his words, though he phrased it as a request she could clearly hear the demand in his tone, and abruptly she decided to take a chance. Maybe she was ready – after all, she'd managed to hold her own in this place without Sasuke for hours now.

Slowly she stepped forward, and glanced over her shoulder slightly, glad that Neji caught on to her assent because she didn't think she was quite ready to engage in any kind of verbal sparring with him just yet. His hand curved around her stomach, holding her back, and she stood pliantly as Neji passed her and took her hand to draw her after him to the bar.

* * *

Neji stared at the girl next to him through narrowed eyes. A week ago he would've taken bets on the fact that she would _never _be caught dead in a place like this, much less wearing something like the scrap of material that currently covered her body. Irritation flashed again, much as it had done periodically since she'd shown up at the party the night before.

"You and Uchiha aren't fooling me, you know," he finally broke the silence between them, watching her as closely as he could, given the low lighting. She turned slightly her expression completely blank, and Neji grudgingly admitted that maybe he'd underestimated this one.

"I have no idea what you mean," she returned coolly, reaching for the drink in front of her again.

Irritation flared into full out anger, and Neji reined his temper in only long enough to allow Tenten to replace her drink on the table. He grabbed her wrists, held them firmly behind her back, and pushed her body against the bar with his own. Her breathing hitched and he smirked into her hair. "I don't know what game you're playing but one thing I do know for sure is that you're not nearly as bad as you and Uchiha are trying to convince everyone you are," he breathed into her ear. She wasn't fighting him and he released her hands, pulling back slightly to look into her eyes, but not letting up on the pressure of his body against hers. Still, she stayed silent. Neji tried again, "There is no way that Uchiha got the same kind of reaction from you that I did." He pushed his hips against her suggestively, just to underline the words.

Tenten stared up at him, her eyes still unreadable, before flashing him the sweet smile she was so adept at, "I really wouldn't be able to answer that in all fairness – that time with you … I mean, no offense obviously, but I just don't really recall … it was over so quickly …"

Shock loosened his hold on her and Tenten fought against the smile that wanted to spring to life at the expression her words evoked. She took advantage of the moment and quickly slipped out from under him, and walked away. One step, two … she'd just begun to think that her words had wounded his pride enough that he was willing to just let her walk away when a strong hand caught hold of her wrist and she was unceremoniously yanked around to crash into his chest.

"If you're really so wild, then prove it," Neji snarled. He let go of her and stepped back, the challenge clear in his eyes, and held her gaze, his movements deliberate as he placed a small white tablet on his tongue.

Without thought Tenten reacted – nothing mattered more than showing Neji that he could not frighten her, that he and the hours they had spent together meant less than nothing to her, and she briefly wondered what it was that he'd placed in his mouth, before her tongue touched the silkiness of his. Neji's arms closed around her in a vice-like grip, their tongues dueling for dominance as the shared tablet slowly dissolved.

They broke apart and Neji was staring at her in a whole different way … as if he'd never really seen her before, and Tenten couldn't help but exalt in that look. His gaze dropped to her lips, slightly swollen from his rough kiss, and his hand cupped her neck as he dragged her closer. Just before his mouth crashed down onto hers with even more leashed violence than before, he whispered heatedly, "There's no way you let Uchiha fuck you – but just in case you did, I'll have to refresh your memory on what it's supposed to feel like."

Tenten shivered, and gave up. Maybe it was the alcohol and the drug talking but at that particular moment she could do nothing but agree that maybe her memory _did_ need refreshing…

* * *

_**A/N: And now for the best part … REVIEW!!!! Please?**_

**_PS. No actual romance has happened as yet, so for those in favor of SasuTen ... this is your last chance to make your votes count ... from the next chapter onward I will need to have a definitive pairing ^^_**

**_~Nokito_**


	3. Chapter 3

_**A/N: Thank you so much to everyone who read/reviewed/alerted/favorited ^^ I'm so glad to hear that everyone is enjoying bad Neji as much as I am! This chapter is a bit on the short side but that's how it came out so I hope you'll all enjoy it regardless! Special thanks to Susan Dreamer who is largely responsible for the quick update - barring the door really helped =D**_

**_Warnings: Erm ... the lemony scene came out a bit smuttier than I intended it to but it's not terribly explicit in my opinion. Still, you have been warned! Skip the first section if you don't like that kind of thing! The rest of the warnings apply too._**

**_Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto (if I did there would be lots of little Hyuugas running around ^^)_**

* * *

_**Chapter 3**_

The pressure of Neji's mouth on hers was bruising, but Tenten reveled in the harshness of his kiss, the bite of hands around her waist. She pressed closer though hardly an inch of space separated them, and bit his lower lip, hard enough to draw blood. Neji growled into her mouth, his hands shifting down to her hips in a melting caress, pulling her tightly against him, as he transferred his mouth to her neck.

She was lost … the shreds of sanity that she may have been able to hold on to disappeared with the drug taking effect and she found that she quite liked the sensation: it seemed as if every touch of Neji's tongue, every sweep of his hands, set every particle of her being alight – she just wanted to be touched so _badly_.

Neji lifted his head and the glare in his eyes softened to a satisfied smirk at her slowly dilating pupils and he swiftly turned her around, pushing her ahead of him to the back of the room. Shadows danced and lights flashed and everything seemed to work in high-speed and slow-motion simultaneously. Tenten's senses spun but she clung to the feel of his large hand at the small of her back like a life-line … as long as she was being touched she really didn't care what was happening around her.

They came out into a dimly lit hallway, storage facilities seemed to line both sides, but Neji paid no attention to their surroundings – simply steered her toward the end of the corridor. Tenten kept walking past the closed doors - they met no one - and the further they went the darker the corridor became until, at last, they were near the end of it and there was only one low-wattage light bulb illuminating the small space. She kept walking, so caught up in the feel of his hands on her body - throughout the long walk to this place he'd kept up the feather-light touches all over her body - and Tenten was quite sure that it had never felt this good to be touched before.

A hand wound in her hair, tickling the nape of her neck, making her shiver before it tightened and Neji yanked her around and pinned her to the wall, his mouth hungrily searching for hers. Their tongues twisted and coiled, and though Neji's mouth was demanding and his hands insistent as they tugged at her hair to angle her head for his mouth, Tenten refused to submit. Her hands curled into the black fabric that covered his shoulders, tugging and pulling but Neji 's superior strength and the intoxicating feeling of his tongue and his hands soon won out: with a slight moan Tenten arched her back to press closer against him, her arms winding around his neck to draw him closer.

"Good girl," he breathed against her mouth as he drew back a little to smirk at her. His gaze travelled down her body, from her mussed hair, dilated pupils and kiss-swollen lips to her toes, and even through the haze that surrounded her senses there was something predatory and proprietary in his hard gaze that she really didn't like. Neji lifted one hand slowly, the light from above casting interesting shadows and colors on his pale skin, and Tenten was so captivated by the shapes that she almost failed to notice when his hand curved around her throat, forcing her chin up, so their eyes met.

Neji's hand slackened, trailed slowly down her skin, a deliberate caress - almost a brand - from her neck down between her breasts, the plunging neckline of the revealing dress allowing his hand to slip over her bared skin. Tenten's breath hitched in her throat, and she bit her lip hard to try and keep the moan that wanted to slip out from being voiced. It was rapidly becoming harder and harder to keep from showing just how much his proximity, his touch, was affecting her spiraling senses, but the innate stubbornness of her nature wouldn't allow her to give in so easily.

"What do you want?" his voice was husky as he stared at the way the dress stretched tight over her breasts as he pulled at the silky fabric that covered them. She stayed silent, not sure she remembered how to speak, never mind being able to find her voice; the drug seemed to expand her awareness to include everything within a 500 meter radius. She was aware of the pounding beat from the main room vibrating through the walls and into her body, matching the beat of her heart. Despite the way that Neji touched her, the smallest thing seemed to distract her and Neji sighed slightly before sliding his hands up her shoulder to slip one strap off. The material slid down her shoulder, baring the curve of her breast, but Tenten was too far gone to protest, she stared up at him with heavy-lidded eyes instead, merely wondering what he would be doing next.

His other hand slid down her side to hitch her leg higher – wrapping it around his hip - and the slippery fabric of the flirty skirt was no barrier, it slid higher accommodatingly. Neji's lips descended to mouth across the curve of her breast, and Tenten's head fell back against the wall, the moan finally escaping when he shifted his attention to the pebbled tip, sucking strongly through the fabric and leaving a wet patch on the dress. The sensation of his tongue brushing over the silk-covered tip was unbearable: her hips jerked, her eyes widened and an incoherent rush of words flowed from her trembling lips.

"I think I'm liking your bad side," his voice vibrated against her skin as he laid a trail of hot kisses in the valley between her breasts, sucking lightly, biting softly, leaving a row of red marks in his wake. Neji drew back to admire his handy work, "God, it's like you're dripping in sin – the eyes, the dress …" the words were a hoarse whisper, he spoke more to himself than to her, and his hands traced reverently over her breasts, cupping and kneading lightly, and Tenten could almost see the drug finally overcoming his senses as well.

Mouths met and clung, their bodies strained against each other, the air thick with tension as Neji wound her hair around his hand again before ripping his mouth away and stepping back. He panted lightly and Tenten glared up at him reproachfully but before she could articulate the need to have him pressed against her, his hand tightened and he dragged her away from the wall by her hair, turning her body around. Her back pressed against his chest and he lay open-mouthed kisses down the back of her neck and over her shoulders. She couldn't help it; she leaned back against him, her body instinctively relaxing into his embrace. It was her first mistake – she should've remembered that Neji wasn't a safe person to relax around.

One violent motion later, Tenten found herself pressed face-first against the wall, Neji's hips holding her own in place tightly. He rocked against her, and their mingled moans rent the air before his hand slid beneath the short skirt to tease at the edge of the lacy fabric over her hip. He didn't give her time to think – not that she was capable of thinking at the moment – but slid his hand over her hip to the front of her body. She shuddered in anticipation, ragged breaths fogging the wall in front of her, and Neji chuckled darkly in her ear, as his fingers moved the fabric of her underwear aside. No warning, no gentleness accompanied the first thrust of his fingers, and Tenten moaned helplessly, hands clawing at the wall, the mingled pleasure and pain almost too much for her. His fingers curled inside of her, and Tenten dazedly wondered if anything could ever feel this good again - was it because of the drug or was it just Neji who had this effect on her? The first time with him she'd been too nervous, too scared, to really _savor_ the experience, but this time … all her attention was focused on her nerve-endings, and the skilled way Neji coaxed a response from her body.

His fingers withdrew but were quickly replaced with his hardness, and he teasingly rubbed himself against her as she writhed and moaned, the position he held her in making it impossible for her to really move.

"Tell me, Tenten … did Uchiha feel this good?" he whispered into her ear, his breathing harsh, his hands holding her hips tight enough to bruise as he nudged her thighs further apart, drawing her hips toward him while the arch of his back kept her upper body against the wall.

"Did he? Did he make you scream?" the words ended in a groan as one smooth thrust sheathed him to the hilt in the warm slickness of her body. Tenten moaned, her entire being centered on the way their bodies joined when Neji started to move. Hard, fast, deep – he wasn't holding back, wasn't trying to pretend that this was anything more than purely physical. One hand eased its hold on her hip and slid over the curve to bury between her thighs, fingers unerringly sliding in a smooth circular motion over the bundle of nerves that ached for his touch.

The blinding pleasure seemed to last forever and yet ended far too soon … Tenten's body convulsed helplessly and a half-screamed, half-moaned version of Neji's name rang through the air. The sight, the sound, the feel of her walls contracting around him trying to drag him deeper … only sheer force of will kept the rising pleasure at bay temporarily as his hands buried in her hair again and he forced a dazed Tenten to her knees in front of him. His hands tightened in her hair almost painfully as he held her against him and Tenten instinctively sucked and licked. Repeated shallow thrusts into her mouth brought him to the brink again quickly, and the combination of the drug and the idea of exploding into her mouth finally broke Neji's endurance. A groan ripped from his chest, his hands held her against his body tightly as his hips jerked erratically.

For a few minutes – endlessly short minutes – no sound disturbed the air but their frantic breathing as they sluggishly pulled their clothes back into place. Neji reached out a hand and drew Tenten to her feet, holding her close. Neji leaned over her, his breath brushing against her mouth, "Be sure to tell Uchiha how you screamed my name in ecstasy," he murmured against her lips before drawing back and walking away without a second glance.

Trembling, Tenten leaned back against the wall. _Not again, goddamnit! _Her second mistake had been believing he'd wanted her, when he only wanted to prove a point.

* * *

Sasuke took one look at Tenten, staring intently into her eyes in the dim lighting of the VIP room, and sighed in disgust, "I see Hyuuga got to you," he stated without inflection, as Tenten sank down next to him on the couch.

The light shining from his blueish-black hair was too captivating to ignore and Tenten leaned forward to touch the silky strands but Sasuke jerked away. "Don't do that," he said sharply, and she crossed her arms as she sulkily subsided against the back of the couch.

"I can smell him all over you - even without the marks he left anyone can guess what you've just been doing," Sasuke spoke again, reaching out with one graceful finger to trace the reddish bruise that marred the inside of one breast. Tenten arched breathlessly into his touch, and Sasuke sighed again, "So. Ecstasy then," he muttered as he moved toward the very end of the couch. For a long moment they stared at each other from the opposite ends, and then the corners of Sasuke's mouth lifted in his trademark smirk, "I was going to introduce you to something better, but I guess we'll save that for another night," he said musingly, but Tenten leaned her head back, watching the reflection of the colored lights flashing over the high ceiling.

She was abruptly dragged to her feet, Sasuke's hand curved around her wrist in a bruising hold. The dark pools of his eyes seemed fathomless, but the cold, commanding light shining from within was clearly visible even to Tenten in her befuddled state.

"Which part of 'I own you' was difficult to understand?" he asked coolly, but the anger underlying the words made Tenten shiver as cold fingers of fear traced down her spine. She shook her head mutely, trying to convey that she didn't know what he meant.

"Let me spell it out for you then," Sasuke forced the words through gritted teeth, and only then did Tenten notice the way his eyes resembled Neji's: the same dilation, the same hazy quality, but whatever Sasuke had taken seemed to make him aggressive more than anything else, and she dropped her gaze quickly.

"You do not drink, or take any form of drug, unless I say so. You do not touch, look at, or fuck anyone unless I tell you to. Do you understand me, Tenten? This is not a world in which to play half-assed games – you will get hurt. You want my help? Then you play by my rules - I will not let you ruin years of struggling to get the right connections because of some stupid fucking crush," he shook her slightly, and Tenten nodded, wide-eyed, but Sasuke let go of her shoulders and grabbed her hand, pulling her after him. She had to nearly run to keep up with the strides he took but he didn't say another word as they left the club, got into his car and drove away.

Sasuke dropped her off at her gate, and she opened the car door, still too high to care about her mother or stepfather possibly seeing her in such a state – she doubted they would be home anyway, they never were– but suddenly the thought of being alone was just too much to bear, and she turned to Sasuke who stared at her with an inscrutable gaze.

"C-can you maybe, you know, give me some of it?" she asked awkwardly, avoiding his gaze, "the stuff you wanted to introduce me to?" the elaboration came out even more awkwardly than the original question, and Sasuke blew out a breath in impatience.

"No, Tenten. You can't take any more – just go sleep," he turned away from her disappointed gaze, "There'll be other opportunities if you really want it that bad."

Her bed was unbelievably soft once she'd managed to navigate her way through the suddenly unfamiliar contours of her home, and Tenten gratefully nestled into the pillows, not bothering to take off the red dress. It seemed as if the drug was finally releasing its hold and she could feel a numbing tiredness stealing over her.

As she closed her eyes her thoughts drifted back to Neji and the way he had been at first, compared to the way he had been tonight. Which was the real Neji? She couldn't help but wonder how it was possible for one person to have sides to their personality that were completely contradictory. While it had felt nothing less than mind-blowing she was quite aware that what she'd shared with Neji tonight could not be classified as anything other than a quick fuck, but the memory of experiencing his soft whispers, gentle touches and heartbreakingly sweet kisses wouldn't stop crashing through her mind. There had been something wrong with him this time, and it hadn't just been the drugs or alcohol: the first time Neji had made love to her, she was sure of it. Though inexperienced at the time, she'd _felt _the way he tried to say things with his body – things he couldn't say with words - but that person held no resemblance to the harsh, almost cruel way he'd manipulated her body tonight. Too tired to even cry Tenten forced Neji's enigmatic behavior from her mind, and let sleep claim her.

* * *

**_A/N: So, what did you think? The plot hints at the end hopefully piqued your interest ^^ Please REVIEW and let me know what you thought!_**


	4. Chapter 4

_**A/N: Thank you so very much to everyone who read/reviewed/alerted/ favorited! You guys rock ^^ Another quick update since I was being threatened with a broomstick ;) (you know who you are =D) and this chapter did give me some trouble but I hope you'll enjoy it nonetheless! Don't forget to R&R – I love hearing what you thought of the chapter!**_

_**This chapter contains drug and alcohol abuse but no lime or lemons – you have been warned.**_

_**Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto**_

* * *

_**Chapter 4**_

Tenten sighed loudly and pretended not to see the glare Sasuke shot at her in retaliation. When Sasuke had called earlier that day to inform her in a few terse sentences that her presence was required at the Uchiha mansion that night, she'd not expected to have to sit around watching a very boring poker game.

Sasuke, Itachi, Deidara, Sasori (another of Itachi's friends) and Suigetsu (whom Tenten knew by sight from school) were engaged in a tournament of some sort, and the amount of actual money being tossed around had amazed her at first. However, Tenten didn't understand the rules of the game and it had become boring to stare at nothing in particular.

She got up and made her way over to the bar – there was no barman in attendance tonight, the Uchiha mansion lay dark and silent except for the six of them in the basement, or so Tenten assumed – and grabbed her third cider. She was just straightening up behind the glass edifice when Deidara's voice interrupted her thoughts.

"Bring me refill, yeah?" he said more than asked, and the others chimed in with their orders just as quickly. Resentment simmered as Tenten grabbed a tray and began to prepare the various drinks – how this was helping her she had no idea – and she shot a baleful glare at Sasuke who only raised his eyebrows coolly at her. The task complete she made her way over to the table and dumped the tray unceremoniously in front of Sasuke - he could pass them around at least.

Still fuming, she flopped back down on the couch and reached for her cell phone, and set about firmly ignoring the others. Unfortunately it was a lot harder to tune out their voices.

"She yours, Itachi?" Sasori's low, even voice broke her concentration on the game she'd started to play, and Tenten's head jerked up as she stared toward the men, incredulity written on her face when she saw that they hadn't even stopped the game to start discussing who _owned_ her.

"She's not here as part of the entertainment, Sasori," Sasuke replied when Itachi only shook his head, "she's … a friend." He grimaced at the last words, and Tenten had to agree: describing them as friends was taking it a bit far, but what else was there to say?

The red-head's eyebrows rose, "You're making friends with the groupies now, Sasuke?" The derision in his tone didn't go unnoticed – indeed he wasn't making any effort to hide it - but Sasuke only sent him a level look and motioned for Suigetsu to take his turn.

Three rounds of cards and five of drinks later, Tenten was ready to rip her hair out. Just when she'd begun seriously considering simply ordering Sasuke to take her home, he sighed and stretched. Sasuke nodded to the table at large in a vague way, and motioned for Tenten to follow him. Thankful for anything that was a change of scene, Tenten stood and followed him out of the basement, aware of Suigetsu just behind her.

Tenten resisted the urge to grab on to the back of Sasuke's shirt to keep her bearings as he stalked through the dark house, not bothering to see if she was keeping up in the unfamiliar surroundings. The alcohol had done the job and she was feeling pleasantly relaxed, the buzz enveloping her in a warm, fuzzy haze.

Sasuke stopped abruptly and Tenten crashed into his back, noticing too late that he'd come to a halt. She reared back instinctively, an apology springing to her lips, but her body was in no condition to deal with sudden movements on slippery floors, and she watched in an almost detached way as her arms wind-milled trying to regain her balance. Sasuke sighed and grabbed her arm, steadying her, before pushing her against the wall, an arm across her shoulders until she stood firmly. A giggle wanted to escape but something about the serious atmosphere told her that giggling was strictly forbidden and she swallowed her laughter and stared at the front door instead.

Without a word being spoken, Sasuke reached into his pocket and drew out a small plastic bag, filled with something white and held out a hand toward Suigetsu. Tenten nearly gasped at the wad of bills the latter placed in Sasuke's outstretched palm with deliberate movements, but then she finally caught on, as Sasuke tossed the bag at Suigetsu, and pushed the money into his pocket.

"Last time," Sasuke's tone rang with warning as he opened the door for the other boy, "if you run out again, you don't come to me."

The door had barely closed behind Suigetsu before Sasuke rounded on Tenten still pressed against the wall. "If you show up too early, don't expect me to drop everything for you," he snarled in her general direction, already heading toward the living room.

The spike of temper was only fueled by the alcohol she'd consumed and she pushed off the wall, following Sasuke, her tone strident as she threw her retaliation at his back, "Maybe if you dropped the cryptic and actually told me things like the time to arrive, then it wouldn't happen. You can't expect me to psychically know when you want me to show up!"

He merely glared at her over his shoulder, and waved a hand to indicate that she should precede him into the living room. A couple of standing lamps illuminated the large room, but the pools of light weren't enough to eradicate the shadows that lingered here and there, and Tenten paused uncertainly, not sure what Sasuke wanted.

A muffled yelp escaped her when he grabbed her upper arm and steered her toward a couch. "God, you're uptight – not even a six-pack can loosen you up, can it?" he asked, staring at her in exasperation, while Tenten curled up into the corner of the couch, glad that she'd worn skinny jeans and a top, instead of the short skirts Sasuke continually tried to force her into.

He dropped down next to her and drew a side table around in front of them. "Maybe this will help," he muttered more to himself than to her, as he drew a sheet of paper out of the small drawer at the top of the table.

Tenten watched in mute fascination as he drew another bag of the white powdery stuff from his pocket and tore it open, spilling some of the almost crystalline substance onto the paper. "Don't touch that," he warned her, standing, and he was gone before Tenten could nod her head. Moments later he returned twirling a couple of short, cocktail straws between his fingers. Without a word of explanation he returned to his task, forming the powder into four thin lines on the paper. When his hands finally stilled, he turned his head slightly, staring at Tenten through his bangs, his expression enigmatic. She stared back, at a loss for what he wanted her to say or do.

"This is cocaine," he finally spoke, "it's an upper … in other words it should make you feel good." He stood up again, and Tenten stared at him curiously. Sasuke stared at her for a moment before shaking his head, "I really don't like pushing drugs, my advice is to stick to alcohol, but you haven't stopped annoying me about when I'll let you try the 'something better' I mentioned at the club a week ago, so … it's your life, right. I'm not going to force you, I'm not going to tell you how you just _have_ to try this – in fact, I'm going to leave you to think about it for a few minutes."

He walked from the room, his hands buried deeply in his pockets, and only when he was out of sight did Tenten's gaze return to the table. She stared at the cocaine, the alcohol making her thinking fuzzy, but the words 'feel good' kept ringing in her ears. The temptation those words invoked …. she wanted so badly to feel good again … she couldn't remember the last time she'd felt good about herself or anything in her life … and, just like that, her decision was made.

She waited impatiently for Sasuke to return and when he finally appeared in the doorway again he was dangling a couple of bottles of water from his fingers. He sighed upon seeing the determined light shining in her eyes. "Didn't think you'd say no," he muttered, and dropped down beside her again.

"On your own head be it," he said, giving her a hard look, "just remember that I didn't force you to do anything when you wind up a crack whore."

Tenten simply reached for one of the cocktail straws and stared at Sasuke expectantly. He huffed another breath and reached for his own straw, quickly inserting one end in one nostril and leaning forward to inhale one of the lines, pinching the other nostril closed. He winced slightly but immediately switched the straw to the other side and repeated the process with another line, before leaning back against the couch and closing his eyes.

Watching him in fascination, Tenten slid off the couch to kneel in front of the small table, and copied Sasuke's movements. The burning in her nose was terrible but she gritted her teeth and rubbed the bridge of her nose to try and ease the feeling. Sasuke opened his eyes and smirked, "Feels like someone rubbed sandpaper in you nose, doesn't it. Just wait – it'll kick in soon."

Sasuke had been right: she did feel good. Confident and sure of herself, not cloudy at all, and Tenten glanced around the room, suddenly overcome by goodwill toward everything her sight lighted upon – Sasuke included. She shifted on the couch and leaned closer to Sasuke. Her thoughts were spinning a mile a minute and every fleeting idea seemed like the epiphany she'd been waiting for all her life. "Have I told you yet how much I _really _like you?" she asked Sasuke, the words tripping off her tongue almost seemed to meld together, and yet they still didn't emerge quick enough to keep up with the speed of her thoughts.

He smiled, actually smiled, not a smirk, a _smile_, and Tenten couldn't keep from grinning happily back at him. She leaned back, her head resting on his shoulder and he didn't seem to mind. "You know," she began, "Neji is such a prick – I don't know what I see in him, I really don't. Did you know that we used to be friends? I bet you didn't, but we were. Way back in middle school. Him and me and Lee – we were inseparable. But then we got to sophomore year and suddenly Neji was too cool for us," her voice dripped with contempt and some remote part of her tried to warn her against telling Sasuke all this but she was utterly unable to stop the words from flowing. "I even used to think that he maybe kind of liked me, you know? Guess I wasn't wrong –he likes my body, it's just me he doesn't like." She paused for a breath and Sasuke interrupted.

"Well, you do have a hot body, lots of curves in all the right places – can you blame the guy?" he pointed out, and though her ears picked up on the fact that his words ran together just as much as hers did, her brain seemed to process the run-on sentence with no trouble. She turned to look up at him, still finding it strange to see Sasuke so relaxed and … content.

"I know," she said, confidently, "and that's why I have to use it as a weapon so that he can pay for what he did. But I think maybe I need seduction lessons or something, 'cause every time I try to be sexy with Neji he somehow has the upper hand."

Sasuke choked on a laugh, and Tenten reflected on her words for a few seconds before she also burst out laughing. They slowly calmed down and, still gripped in her new-found confidence, Tenten gave Sasuke a calculating look before sliding a hand slowly down his chest before trailing one fingernail along the teeth of the zipper on his jeans. Sasuke gave her a considering look and gripped her wrist, lifting her hand away from his body, "Yeah, maybe you do need seduction lessons," he said, "you should talk to Ino or Sakura … I'm sure they'll have some tips for you."

* * *

Tenten tapped an impatient foot as she waited for the last bell to ring. Thank God it was Friday – the first lesson Sasuke had taught her was that you did not party during the week: going to school high, hung-over, or on a crash, was looking for trouble. She'd taken the lesson to heart, but the downside was that she could barely wait for a weekend to roll around, and as a result her grades had dropped a bit. Not enough to cause serious concern but enough that Tenten knew she had to be more careful. The bell finally pealed and Tenten shot to her feet and was out into the hallway before she realized that Temari was calling her.

"Ten! Tenten, wait!"

She slowed reluctantly, allowing her friend to catch up, and quickly set off for her locker once the other girl had drawn level with her. Tenten didn't look at Temari but she could feel the blonde giving her a careful once over.

"So, are we studying this weekend?" Temari asked finally, and Tenten shook her head. "But it's a really important test, Ten! We always study together for the really important ones," Temari protested, just a trace of sulkiness in her tone.

"Can't," Tenten said briskly, "I've got plans."

Temari's mouth twisted, "With Sasuke? Or with Neji? Or maybe both?" she asked snidely, and sighed when Tenten shot her a hurt look. "I'm sorry," she muttered, but continued undaunted, "You never have time for your old friends anymore – when's the last time you even spoke to Lee?"

"I've just been really busy, Mari. And not just with the plan to make Neji sorry. I've got a lot on my plate, okay?" Tenten deflected the question, slamming her locker shut. She turned to Temari, impatiently waiting for her friend to give up so that she could go.

Blonde eyebrows arched as Temari processed the fact that Tenten had placed all her books in her locker, "Already done studying for the test?" she asked suspiciously, and Tenten nearly cursed out loud, her impatience was making her sloppy.

"Uh … yes, actually," she said vaguely before deciding that she was clearly going to have to be rude before Temari would leave, "I've got to go, Mari, okay? I'll talk to you later." Without another word the brunette whirled and strode off down the hall at a brisk pace, leaving Temari to stare after her, worrying her bottom lip between her teeth.

* * *

"So … huge test on Monday," Kiba said, lazily stretching out across one of the black leather chairs that decorated Sasuke's basement. Sasuke and Itachi's parents had died in car crash years before, an uncle they never saw noted as their official guardian, but it made the Uchiha mansion the perfect place to hang out – no parental supervision whatsoever.

Various groans and protests rang through the room at Kiba's words, the entire crowd had assembled for a mellow Friday evening, but Tenten was burning with impatience: Sasuke never let her do anything but drink unless the two of them were alone in his living room, he claimed that it was safer that way, but Tenten hated having to wait.

"What's the plan this time?" Neji asked from his spot across from Tenten. She was trying her utmost to ignore the speculative looks he kept sending her way - no way was she allowing him to catch her in another compromising situation.

"Why not the same plan as last time?" Kiba asked sitting upright with a gleam in his eyes, "I liked that plan."

"Kiba, there is no way that plan will work again," Sasuke spoke up, returning from the bar and handing Tenten a shot of tequila. She frowned, he always tried to placate her with alcohol but a part of her knew that if she pushed he could start making it very hard for her to get a fix and as long as she was getting her highs for free she judged it best to keep her mouth shut. She took the tequila.

"There is no way that any teacher would be stupid enough to fall for your tricks again," Sasuke continued. Neji caught on to Tenten's confused expression and leaned forward, a smirk on his handsome face as he elaborated for her, "Whenever there's a big test we make sure to get the answer sheet – that way no precious time needs to be spent studying. Last time, Kiba seduced it out of a sub – I hear she got suspended from teaching for it, once Kurenai returned from maternity leave and figured out that she was screwing Kiba." The last bit was directed at the room at large, and Tenten was glad that the resulting groans and laughter masked her shocked expression.

Once the teasing died down, Neji turned back to Tenten, "I propose that Tenten gets it this time," he said slyly, not missing the way she paled at the suggestion, "She's new, so she's never had a turn, and she's still got such a squeaky clean slate that no one would ever suspect her."

As always, Tenten was utterly unable to back down from the challenge she saw in Neji's eyes, "Fine," she agreed coolly, "though I'll need someone to help me."

Neji smirked, "I'll volunteer," he said smoothly before anyone could say anything. Tenten saw Sasuke's frown from the corner of her eye, she was sure he was cursing her since it would inevitably become his problem to help her succeed, but she was too busy returning Neji's gaze with a steely one of her own to really worry about the consequences of her agreement.

* * *

_**A/N: I've got absolutely no experience of cocaine or its effects; the chapter was written using info I gleaned from the Internet and I apologize if I got it wrong! That aside, what did you think? Still interesting? PLEASE REVIEW!!!!**_


	5. Chapter 5

_**A/N: Thank you to everyone who reviewed/alerted/favorited, and thank you to the silent lurkers, too ^^ I'm glad to hear that everyone is still enjoying the story! Please don't forget to let me know what you thought!**_

_**Warnings: The usual ones apply (drugs, alcohol … and maybe just a tiny bit of suggestiveness?)**_

_**Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto**_

* * *

_**Chapter 5**_

Saturday morning dawned much too quickly for Tenten, and she groaned when the sunlight hit her eyes – someone was drawing the curtains to allow the bright morning light into the room. She kept her eyes closed but her mother's cheerful voice sounded, and Tenten jerked upright, instinctively gathering the sheets close to her body so it covered her up to her chin. She had no idea if her body bore any betraying marks.

"Come on, honey, it's past nine already. You never sleep this late," her mother's voice was faintly reproachful, and Tenten struggled to focus her gaze. With her back turned, her mother fastened the curtains away, but continued in the same annoyingly cheerful tone, "One of your friends is here to pick you up – did you forget? Such a handsome boy, too! I'm sure he won't mind waiting while you take a quick shower - but hurry, hmm?"

Thankfully her mother swept from the room without waiting for a reply, and Tenten dropped back down, an arm over her eyes. Her mother's words tugged at her memory: Neji had insisted that he take her home at about one, citing their need to be clear-headed to get the answer sheet the next day. How he knew that the TA for that class would be at school this morning she had no idea but, according to Neji, the answer sheet would be in the teacher's classroom – and the TA was their ticket to getting it.

Apprehension tied her stomach up into knots and she kicked herself for allowing him to pressurize her into this: to be honest she'd much rather fail on Monday than be caught cheating. Another groan slipped past her lips and she rolled from the bed, heading for the shower and contemplating ways to get out of this.

When she finally made her way downstairs half an hour later, simply dressed in jeans and a t-shirt with her hair up in two buns, she nearly choked at the sight that greeted her. Neji was in the living room with her mother and her stepfather (when had they come home anyway?) clearly charming the birds from the trees, if their laughter was anything to go by. She gritted her teeth and glared at Neji behind her parents' backs.

"We should go or we'll be late," she ground out – for some reason she felt more violated by the fact that he'd invaded her home and made her parents like him, than she did by the callous way he'd treated her body a few weeks ago.

"Good morning, Tenten," he said smoothly, arching an eyebrow slightly as if to say 'play nice' but he rose nonetheless and turned to her parents. "It's been nice talking to you," he said sincerely, so sincerely that, if Tenten hadn't known that he was being completely insincere, she would've believed him too. Her mother fluttered a little, and her stepfather extended a hand for Neji to shake, standing and escorting the younger man to the door. Tenten swiftly moved out of the way, so that no part of Neji's body could brush against her as he passed, and immediately regretted the action when her mother grabbed her hand and whispered, "What a wonderful young man – I'm so happy you've found a nice boyfriend!"

_Oh, if only you knew_, Tenten thought darkly as she smiled vaguely at her mother and followed after Neji.

* * *

Her breathing came in short, sharp gasps that she was doing her utmost to suppress with little success. Large hazel eyes, made even bigger by fright, lifted to Neji's and Tenten was powerless to stop the pleading she knew shone from her gaze.

They were outside the classroom, the school deserted except for a few teachers and assistants working over-time, and Tenten couldn't help but feel as if every eye in the building was trained on her as if they knew exactly what she and Neji were hoping to accomplish.

"What should I do?" she asked stupidly, too caught up in fear to care that she was baring her weakness to Neji of all people, and her thoughts spinning so frantically that she completely missed the glint of something like sympathy in Neji's calm gaze.

"I don't know," he shrugged, "Just … flirt with him or something. If you get him to leave with you I can get in there and look for the paper."

She nodded, determination hardening her expression, and turned to the door. With one hand on the knob she paused. Neji prodded her in the back, a wordless command to get on with it, but Tenten whirled around. "I can't!" she wailed in a whisper, "I'm sorry, but I just can't!"

Tears sparkled in her eyes, darkening the color to a deep brown, and she flew at Neji, her hands fisting in his shirt as she tried to drag him away from the classroom. Even through her mental distress she couldn't help the shivers skating down her spine when Neji's arms closed around her. His voice was low, and somehow stern, "Just relax."

A final shuddering breath ripped through her and Neji backed her into the wall next to the door, hands coming up to rest on either side of her head. "You owe me," he whispered, tongue slicking out to trail suggestively over the seam of her lips, and then he was gone: he'd opened the door and walked into the classroom before Tenten could even formulate a protest.

Tenten reacted instinctively: she ran for it - straight out of the school and towards Neji's car. If he got caught she could always claim that she'd had no knowledge of his plan, and her spotless record would ensure that she was believed. Barely ten minutes had passed – ten anxious minutes – before Neji returned, hands in his pockets, sunglasses firmly in place, as he strode casually toward the car. The locks clicked and Tenten got in without waiting for an invitation, turning to Neji fearfully once he slid into the driver's seat beside her.

He started the engine without a word, one hand turning the steering wheel with his palm, the other reaching into his pocket and tossing a few folded pages onto her lap as they drove through the gates.

"H-how?" Tenten stammered, unfolding the pages to make sure that it was indeed the answer sheet they'd gone to steal. Neji stole a glance in her direction, his mouth pressed into a thin line, but then he sighed.

"I know the TA," he admitted reluctantly, "He's a total weed-head, hence the assisting, he has to do it for extra credit or something. Anyway, I just threatened to withhold his supply and make sure that every dealer in town knows not to sell to him, sweetened the deal by promising him some on credit, and he did all the dirty work himself."

Aware that her mouth was agape but unable to gather her thoughts so she could gain some control over her motor functions, Tenten just stared at him. Finally she managed to snap her mouth shut and looked away. But her eyes kept turning back to Neji's profile again and again, and, at last, she could contain the burning curiosity no longer, "So … are you like … his … I don't know, dealer or whatever?"

Neji chuckled but it was devoid of any mirth, "Now you know my big secret: I have to deal on the side because my uncle, unlike most of the other parents, doesn't believe in simply giving us cash to make us go away. No, we have to _budget _with the little allowance we receive in a month." The sneer in his voice was apparent and Tenten stared at Neji in surprise – back when they had been friends he'd shown his uncle some respect at least – though he'd never made a big secret of the fact that there was little love lost between him and his family.

He glanced at her and she could see the defensive set of his mouth, could imagine the challenge sparking in his eyes beneath the dark glasses, "Going to tell on me?" he asked, striving for an aggressive tone but not really managing to hide the hints of unease that colored his voice. Tenten shook her head mutely, and stared out the window again. One thing was becoming clearer by the second: whoever Neji had been when she'd counted herself among his friends was gone. In his place was a defensive, angry individual, and she got the distinct impression that she did not want to be on the receiving end of his temper.

"Thank you," Neji said quietly. She jerked away from her contemplation of the trees whizzing by and stared at Neji in surprise, noting the set of his shoulders, the clench of his jaw, the white knuckles as he clutched the steering wheel, and wondered why he would thank her for something like that. Or at all.

* * *

Most of Saturday was spent at the Uchiha mansion, helping each other memorize the answers for the test. Tenten was jittery, nervous … for some reason Neji had allowed the others to think that she'd been the one who got the answer sheet, and it was making her paranoid; his whispered 'you owe me' still rang in her ears, and she was uncomfortably aware of the simultaneous threat and promise the words contained.

She had to get her seduction act together as quickly as possible – that much was clear. She was determined that Neji would be the one left behind on his knees next time. Decision made she decided to take Sasuke's advice and quickly stood from her place on the floor, and headed for Ino and Sakura who were watching Fashion TV with the volume turned down instead of studying with the rest of them.

"Hi," she said awkwardly, shifting her weight from one foot to the other. They glanced up but didn't return the greeting , merely nodded, and Sakura patted the seat next to her in an absentminded way. After a moment spent staring at the screen – Fashion TV had never interested Tenten and it didn't now - she cleared her throat, "Um, so, why aren't you guys studying too?" she asked hesitantly.

Ino snorted, "I can't study with others – I'll make a copy and cram tomorrow night," she said in an offhand way, but Sakura returned Tenten's small smile as she said, "Me too."

At a loss, Tenten merely nodded and sat back, pretending to watch as she pleated her t-shirt between nervous fingers. At last Ino gave a loud, long-suffering sigh, stood and went to the bar, where she rummaged around for a few minutes before she withdrew a bottle of gold colored liquid and rejoined the other girls; three small shot glasses clutched in her other hand.

She motioned Tenten and Sakura to join her on the floor and they sat in a sort of circle while Ino stacked the bottle and the glasses in the center. She sat back and folded her hands under her chin, focusing a piercing look at Tenten. "So, what did you want from us?" she asked, direct and to the point as always.

Tenten swallowed nervously and decided that it didn't really matter if the girls liked her or not as long as they helped her. "I wanted advice on how to seduce a guy … you know, really make him beg," she said at last, licking her lips.

Ino and Sakura shared a glance and the latter reached for the bottle, measuring out three shots, "Thought so," the pink-haired girl's voice was thoughtful as she indicated the others to take their drinks. All three raised their glasses in silence and downed the golden liquor, replacing the glasses in the middle. Tenten tried her utmost to keep the grimace from her face – the sickly sweet licorice taste was nauseating. Sakura and Ino both turned around slightly, checking whether the boys were out of earshot before they leaned closer, Tenten instinctively following, so the three leaned over the bottle and glasses, heads close together.

"It's like this …" Sakura started, a devilish smile lighting her features.

* * *

Tenten leaned languidly back against Ino's legs, as the latter played with her hair. Alcohol had been flowing freely for the last few hours and she had no idea what time it was, and found that she didn't care. Luckily, the more experienced girls had suggested doing a round robin earlier, before they were all too drunk to be coherent, and Tenten's mother – she'd never thought the day would arrive that she was unhappy that her mother was in town for a change – was under the impression that she was sleeping over at Sakura's house. Sakura's mother thought she was with Tenten, and Ino's mother thought she was at Hinata's house. Ino's parents, it transpired, where a lot stricter than either Sakura's or Tenten's, and the only way her father would allow her to sleep over was if he knew the other girl wasn't a bad influence, so before that call had been made, Ino had made sure to wheedle a promise to cover for her from Neji's shy cousin via text messages. Once the task had been accomplished Ino had declared that Tenten's hair deserved a make-over and much to Tenten's surprise she'd found herself agreeing.

"Look at Sakura," Ino laughed, "the slut." And Tenten turned her gaze to the open area before the bar where Sakura was dancing to the pounding beat she'd chosen to play. It was a testament to how quickly one could become jaded that Tenten didn't even wince at the sight of the pink-haired girl swaying her hips, grinding her ass into Sasuke, who was holding on to her waist, a flushed look on his features. She wound her body around his like a snake, one hand lifting behind her to wrap around his neck, fingers winding in his hair, as she rubbed her back against his front.

The beat increased in tempo and Sakura lifted her unoccupied hand to make a come hither motion to Sai, who was sitting at the bar watching his girlfriend dance with Sasuke without any expression whatsoever. Almost unwillingly, it seemed, he straightened from his seated position and went to join the two on the dance-floor. Sakura grabbed the front of his shirt as soon as he was within touching distance and pulled him tightly against her. As she swayed seductively between the two boys, she turned her head slightly to wink at Tenten and Ino, both of them promptly dissolving into peals of laughter at the stupidity of men.

"And _that _is how it's done," Ino told Tenten in satisfaction once they'd regained control of themselves. "Though, those kind of blatant techniques never seem to work on Neji," she added with a sidelong glance at the Hyuuga who was reclining on the couch talking to Gaara.

"Hmm, no, I don't think it would – with Neji you have to be subtle … allow him to think he's got you when, in fact, it's the other way around," Tenten agreed, taking another swig of …. something. She had no idea what she was drinking anymore. "For Neji it's all about the challenge," she added with a derisive glance in his direction. Abruptly she decided that there was no time like the present to put the plan that had been dancing in the back of her mind for the last few hours into action. "Right," Tenten announced to Ino, pushing herself to her feet, only a little unsteady despite the many drinks, "Operation bring Hyuuga Neji to his knees begins now."

"Good luck," Ino said with a doubtful glance at Tenten, but she shrugged and also jumped to her feet, moving off to join Sakura. Tenten could feel her heart pounding, but she gritted her teeth and forced her legs to move her forward.

* * *

Neji broke off in the middle of the sentence when Tenten's shadow fell over his face. He stared up at her impassively, waiting in silence for her to say what she'd come to say. To his surprise she dropped down on her knees next to the couch, and when he started to push himself into a sitting position she let him be. He glared at her suspiciously, but she simply turned her body so that she could insinuate herself between his knees. He leaned back in surprise, firmly ignoring the way his heart sped up at the contact.

"That's my cue to go," Gaara announced into the silence, before he disappeared silently in Naruto's direction. The latter was playing some kind of card game with Kiba and trying his utmost to ignore the depravity surrounding him, though his gaze flicked to Sasuke, Sakura and Sai from time to time, worry creasing his forehead.

"What do you want?" Neji asked, cursing the fact that his voice came out low and intimate, slightly gruff, as if he had to clear his throat. Which he promptly did – the last thing he needed was for Tenten to realize what kind of effect her forward behavior was having on his hormones.

"Why did you let everyone think I'd gotten the test paper?" she asked, staring straight into his eyes, and Neji found he was unable to hold her gaze for fear of what she'd see there. Instead he shrugged, "Seemed like having you owe me one was preferable to your humiliation," he drawled at last, and nearly jumped out of his skin when one small hand wriggled its way beneath the hem of his shirt to stroke over his stomach. Neji sucked in a breath, trying to will his muscles to stop jumping beneath her touch.

Tenten angled her head slightly, as if considering his words, "I do owe you one, don't I?" she asked in a voice dripping with promise, and Neji's eyes narrowed as his, admittedly befuddled, brain struggled to make sense of her actions and words. One thing was sure though: Tenten was trying to seduce him – and he had no idea why.

Abruptly Tenten sat up on her knees, leaning forward as far as possible, until their bodies were pressed together tightly, and she breathed into his ear, "I hate having unpaid debts." The words were accompanied by a small flick of her tongue, a slight tugging of her teeth on his earlobe, and Neji found his eyes sliding shut almost involuntarily. The sudden absence of her warmth pressed against him was disconcerting and Neji opened his eyes in confusion, staring up at a now standing Tenten with dissatisfaction pulling at his mouth.

"Don't pout," she said as she leaned over him again, brushing her hand over the growing bulge in his pants. With a smirk she turned to go, but Neji reached out and grabbed her hand, drawing it back to his body, uncaring of the rules at the moment. He grunted in frustration when she didn't tighten her grip or make any movement whatsoever and finally let go, an open glower on his face. Tenten laughed lightly, a tinkling of chimes, and one of his favorite sounds in the world - not that he'd ever admit it. "I guess I forgot to add that I pay my debts in my own time," she murmured blowing him a kiss as she turned to join the grinding bodies on the makeshift dance-floor.

* * *

The 'dance-floor' was a slightly sweaty mass of groping, grinding bodies but, somehow, Tenten found that she was having fun nonetheless. She was fairly sure the boys were only using 'dancing' as an excuse to feel her, Ino and Sakura up, because the half-hearted swaying motions they made every now and again really didn't qualify as dancing. The moment found her pressed up against Sasuke, his heavy-lidded gaze sweeping her with the familiar considering look he seemed to adopt whenever he looked at her, and Tenten found herself pushed tightly into him by the pressure of a body at her back. She turned to glare at whoever it was but her gaze met Ino's blue one, sparkling with suppressed excitement, and she returned the blonde girl's wink.

One arm lifted to wind around Sasuke's neck as she swayed slowly against him, drawing back just a little so that their clothes brushed together but not their actual bodies. Sasuke's hands gripped her hips hard but Tenten chose to ignore the invitation to move closer. She was still considering ways of using the situation to her advantage when another set of strong hands dragged her unceremoniously away from the Uchiha and out of the press of bodies. She wasn't even really surprised. Well, she was surprised that her 'flirting' had had an effect so quickly but that was all. She stood quietly, allowing Neji's arm to curve around her body, just under her breasts, as he drew her tightly against his chest, and whispered, "I'm a better bet for what you've got in mind than Uchiha. Doubt he can get it up in his state."

Tenten suppressed the laughter that wanted to escape and allowed Neji to turn her around so she was pressed tightly against him instead. She swayed against him, making sure to only brush her body lightly against his, but Neji had other ideas, and he took a firm hold of her hips, pulling her tightly against him and keeping her there.

Vague panic began to set in as she realized that she, once again, found herself in a situation with Neji where he had the upper hand. She tried squirming a little – just to put some space between their bodies – but Neji only smirked at her useless efforts. His knowing gaze seemed to beckon to her, the ultimate temptation, as if he was saying 'you know you want it, why fight it'.

Help came from the most unexpected of places: just when Tenten found herself teetering on the brink of submission, Ino and Sakura appeared on either side of her. They grabbed her arms and pulled her away, not even sparing Neji a glance, as Sakura shouted over the music, "I love this song!" They pulled her to the other side of the dance-floor and Tenten breathed a sigh of relief as she shot the two girls a grateful look.

Shaking her head, Ino leaned over to speak directly into Tenten's ear, "You really do need the help. You don't just give in like that! Tomorrow I think we'll go over to Sakura's and we'll spend the day teaching you the basics – it's pitiful to watch how you can barely hold your own against Neji!"

Recognizing the fact that she needed all the help she could get, Tenten only nodded, and tried her utmost to not think of the things they'd likely expect her to do. In the moments she'd spent pressed up against Neji, she'd come to the painful conclusion that the fact of the matter was: where Neji was concerned she had a snowball's hope in hell of ever resisting him.

* * *

_**A/N: Meh, this chapter gave me a lot of trouble but I hope that the OOC-ness (and other bad things) weren't too distracting! Don't forget to REVIEW! Pretty please?**_


	6. Chapter 6

_**A/N: Thanks to everyone who reviewed/alerted/favorited! It really does mean a lot to me. This update has been a bit longer in coming and I'm sorry for that – I was working on Precious Things (those of you reading that one will be glad to hear that the first of the revised chapters should be out soon ^^). I hope you'll all let me know what you thought of this chapter – REVIEW and make my day! Please?**_

_**Warnings: Usual ones apply: drugs, alcohol, language and there's a bit of smexiness at the end of the chapter too ^^**_

_**Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto**_

* * *

_**Chapter 6**_

"So he just upped and left you there?" Ino gasped, clutching one of Sakura's pink heart-shaped pillows tightly.

Tenten nodded mournfully, reaching for the whiskey bottle that stood on Sakura's bedside table. Though she'd woken up with a massive hangover, the other girls had been as good as their word and as soon as they'd been semi-presentable they'd gone to Sakura's house, ostensibly to 'study' for the test the next morning. As soon as it had become clear that Sakura's parents were out, the pink-haired girl had pulled out a bottle of her father's whiskey, promising Tenten that she'd feel better as soon as she'd had a bit to drink. Much to Tenten's surprise it had been true – though now she found herself a little tipsy all over again.

"Yes," she whispered, "not a word, nothing. Just stood, dressed, and left." Sakura's gasp joined Ino's growl of outrage, and both girls immediately began to shout questions and comments to Tenten, who covered her ears laughingly. "One at a time!" she yelled over the noise.

Ino glared at Sakura until the latter gave in with a petulant pout and Ino launched the first question, "How did you wind up at a hotel with Neji anyway?" the blonde asked, confusion furrowing her brow as she took the bottle from Tenten and took a swig.

"I don't know," Tenten said helplessly, "a couple of months ago, Neji suddenly started talking to me again – and at first I thought nothing of it, but then he asked me out, and all the old feelings came rushing back and so I thought 'why not' you know? We went on a few dates, and he was just so …"

"Wonderful? Perfect? Charming? Surprisingly vulnerable and sweet?" Sakura supplied, the bitterness obvious in her tone. She ignored the surprised glance Tenten gave her and simply reached for the bottle. Ino held it out of her way and tilted the pink-haired girl's chin up with her other hand until their gazes met, "The past, Saku," she said sternly, "put it behind you – I thought we'd agreed on that?"

"It is behind me," Sakura said sulkily, "I just hate that the same thing happened to Tenten – or well, not the same _exactly_, but the whole falling-for-the-bad-boy-charm-only-to-get-screwed-over thing."

Ino groaned, "We've been through this!" she exclaimed, "and this goes for you too, Tenten. So we've all been screwed over royally by the opposite sex – so what? It doesn't make us any less deserving – if anything it's a testament to the utter stupidity of men! We're lucky to have learned early on not to trust them – we should see it as the liberating experience it is. Even though it hurts like hell sometimes, we should be grateful that we're now able to move beyond petty things like what everyone thinks of us and just enjoy our lives!"

Tenten stared at the other two in total confusion, "Erm … I think I'm missing something," she ventured finally. Ino blew out a breath and leaned back against the headboard, "Sakura got screwed over by Sasuke," she said bluntly, ignoring the girl's wince, "not quite as bad as what Neji did to you, but nonetheless – he totally used her and then threw her away when Karin appeared on the scene. And that's the point I'm trying to make – why is it okay for guys but not for girls? That's sexism, you know. Like, if they can just go ahead and fuck whoever they feel like without it having to be any big thing then why can't we?"

Tentatively Tenten nodded, there was something wrong with that picture but Ino's words made so much sense that she nearly kicked herself for not seeing it before. "Yeah," she said nodding vigorously, "why can't I just use Neji for sex right back?"

Sakura and Ino laughed, "You should see the expression on your face!" Sakura gasped finally, "like you're saying something in a different language with only the most basic idea of what the words mean."

Once they'd all calmed down again Tenten asked quietly, "And you, Ino? What's your horror story?"

Uncharacteristically the blonde remained silent, her shoulders slumping slightly as she took a deep breath. Sakura placed a comforting hand on her friend's knee and looked seriously at Tenten, "She and Shikamaru used to be together, I don't know if you know? But, yeah, I guess you would, considering Temari's your friend and all…" her voice trailed off uncertainly as she glanced at Ino again.

"It's okay, Sakura," Ino said, raising her head, the familiar blue fire back in her gaze, "To put it simply, I got dumped for my 'lack of innocence'. We were all fairly heavily into the drug scene back then, but Shika wanted out, and when I wouldn't choose him over my friends we just sort of fell apart. He started seeing Temari and when he finally officially broke it off he just said that she was refreshing because she still found natural enjoyment in life – she was still innocent and he liked that. It wasn't anything against me, personally, but how the hell are you supposed to not take a comment like that personally?" Ino asked the other two imploringly.

"But it was a wake-up call that I needed quite badly, and since that day I haven't touched drugs – not even a quick drag from a joint," Ino said, proudly, and Sakura nodded her agreement, "We drink –but we don't do drugs," she told Tenten who looked suddenly very uncomfortable, "except for Neji, Sasuke, Suigetsu and Gaara, none of us do anymore – and they're mostly careful to keep it purely social, you know?"

"What have you done?" Sakura asked quietly when Tenten didn't look up or respond in any way. A long silence reigned, until Tenten felt each of her hands being picked up and lightly squeezed. "It's okay," Ino whispered comfortingly, "we're not going to judge you or anything – just because we don't doesn't automatically mean you're beneath us or anything."

Brown eyes sparkled with tears as Tenten raised her head, "It's just – I know it's wrong, right? I know I shouldn't, but … ever since Neji … I feel like I'm not worthy of anything good in my life, you know? I keep thinking 'how could you have been so stupid' – I mean, I totally believed that there was more there! I can barely look Temari in the eye – and she's been my best friend forever! It's like I'm different – like I'm tainted or something. That's why I wanted to get back at him, maybe then I'll finally be able to put him behind me and feel like I'm worth something again."

The three stared at each other, and for the first time since her life had started spinning out of control, Tenten felt as if she was accepted. No matter how much she knew Temari loved her she also knew that a part of her friend couldn't help judging her behavior – but here was two people who understood exactly how she felt, and even though Tenten knew that the alcohol was largely responsible for the upsurge of emotion she couldn't keep the sentimentality from escaping. "I'm really glad to get to know you guys," she said sincerely, "I'm sorry that I didn't do it sooner." The laughter was a much needed distraction and the whiskey bottle made another few rounds as they plotted ways for Tenten to make Neji beg.

* * *

Tenten breathed a huge sigh of relief when she left the classroom the next morning. The test had gone without a hitch. Entering the classroom between Sakura and Ino, she'd been sure a neon sign flashing 'cheater' went on above her head, but the teacher didn't seem to notice anything out of the ordinary, and Tenten had been careful to change a few of her answers as well as paraphrasing every single thing she wrote, so that there would be no indication that she'd had her hands on the answer sheet.

She tugged uncomfortably at the borrowed jeans she wore – Sakura had a more athletic build than Tenten did and she was very aware of the way the fabric stretched across her ass, though, if the glances she was receiving were anything to go by, it didn't look too bad.

"Tenten!"

She jumped at Temari's loud voice just behind her and quickly whirled around, hand to her heart, to glare at her friend. "You'll give me a heart attack!"

"Yeah?" Temari glared at her, "you'd deserve one!"

"What did I do now?" Tenten asked resignedly, walking off. She was in no mood for Temari's bitching – she was hung-over, _again_, her mother was no doubt very pissed off at her for simply leaving a voice message informing her parent that she was sleeping over again so that they could study, and the clothes she'd borrowed from Sakura made her feel ridiculously conspicuous.

"Explain to me how you claimed you were done studying for the test and yet, when I phoned your house yesterday, your mother informed me that you were studying at Sakura's house," the hurt was obvious in the blonde's voice and Tenten sighed.

"It sort of just happened, okay? It wasn't planned or anything," she said evasively.

Abruptly Temari stuck out her hand, grabbing Tenten by the elbow and whirling her around so they were face to face. "Sakura, Tenten?" She asked in disbelief, "Since when do you have anything to say to the slut society?" She leaned closer, staring intently into Tenten's eyes, "You look like hell."

"Thanks very much!" Tenten snapped, losing her temper, "And please don't insult my friends."

Temari reeled back as if Tenten had slapped her, "So that's how it is," she said, almost to herself, and without another word she turned and began to walk away.

"Temari…" Tenten called after her, immediately contrite but not really knowing what to say to make the situation better. Temari turned slowly and stared sadly at Tenten, "No, don't bother," she said, "I don't even know you anymore – and clearly you'd rather be with your new friends anyway, so just … don't bother." She walked off at a brisk pace, leaving Tenten to deal with the curious stares.

A hand on her shoulder snapped her out of her thoughts and Tenten jumped again, this time to face Sasuke – an inscrutable look on his face. "You're hanging out with Ino and Sakura now" he stated, casually steering her in the opposite direction. "It's better that way – Temari would've been the downfall of all your scheming anyway."

Tenten nodded, still bemused by the unexpectedness of her fight with Temari, and allowed him to steer her toward Ino and Sakura as the two stood chatting in front of the latter's locker.

* * *

Neji glared at Tenten, Ino and Sakura as the three made their way down the hall. Truth be told, it scared him – how easily Tenten had slipped into her new role. She now wore the clothes, had the hip-swaying walk that made every guy in the vicinity stop and stare, not to mention the fact that she could party with the best of them.

He hated it. Hated how the innocence no longer sparkled in her eyes, hated how she stared at everything with a vaguely bored, half-lidded gaze – clearly sending out the message that she was not impressed by anything she saw. But most of all he hated how he had no one to blame for her downfall but himself.

Oh, he'd tried to blame Sasuke – and, to be fair, some of the credit did fall to the raven-haired boy, but Neji was under no illusions that it was him alone that had started her off on this path of self-destruction. For the millionth time he regretted ever having gotten involved with her – but the temptation to see if she was as sweet as he remembered her being, to see if the goodness that shone from her would be the balm that his soul had needed so badly a few months ago, had been too much for someone used to giving in to every hedonistic urge he possessed. But what had begun as a harmless game – a little fun – had spiraled rapidly out of his control, and he absolutely detested being out of control.

His fists clenched when the three girls stopped in front of a group of appreciative boys – the urge to drag Tenten away from the glances was almost overpowering - but somehow he held himself in check and merely watched as Ino flirted with one of them. The poor boy blushed and stammered but handed over a sheaf of paper with alacrity – homework Ino had forgotten no doubt – and then the girls were moving on and he could breathe again.

Neji frowned as he slammed his locker shut. Why did this bother him so much? She was hardly his first virgin – the drawback of still being in high school: most girls required quite a bit of cajoling before they'd let you into their pants – but Neji had moved on from that a long time ago. As soon as he'd gotten wind of the fact that not all college girls were averse to screwing a high school guy, in fact - especially not one that looked like him. He'd made an exception for Tenten and maybe that was why he felt this way? Maybe he'd grown so used to experienced women that he had forgotten how to deal with the inexperienced ones?

He shook his head and put all thoughts of Tenten from his mind. It really didn't bear thinking about – she was no concern of his – but the little voice at the back of his mind said that was exactly why he was so pissed: Tenten was ignoring him and he hated that more than he'd ever dreamed possible.

* * *

Dissatisfaction pulled at Tenten's mouth as she stared around at the milling party-goers. Sasuke and Itachi were hosting another party – though this one was more Itachi's than Sasuke's. She tossed back the shot in front of her – uncaring of what it was – and turned on her heel to walk away from the bar. She'd been so sure that tonight would be the night she would leave Neji begging but he was immersed in some blonde bimbo's cleavage and hadn't so much as glanced her way all night.

The little bit of confidence she'd managed to build up with Ino and Sakura's help was steadily crumbling and abruptly Tenten gave in to the misery swirling in her heart. Apparently she was only good enough for a quick tumble when there were no better offers to be had. Cursing fluently under her breath Tenten wiped at the traitorous tears and headed off in search of Ino or Sakura.

When she finally caught a glimpse of Sakura's pink hair, she almost immediately turned to leave. Sakura was clearly occupied – she and Sai were grinding to the beat of the music, oblivious to all else. _I hate feeling like this! _she screamed inwardly when she saw Ino just a few meters away from Sakura, dancing with a couple of Itachi's friends. How she wished she could be like them – could just let go, and enjoy the moment, keeping the sadness at bay until a time she felt able to deal with it.

But she wasn't Ino or Sakura, and despite the jaded air she'd adopted, she was still the same inside and she found herself glancing around, desperate for anything to make her forget. Itachi's dark eyes met hers for a second before he glanced away and Tenten seized on the resulting thought with relief. _Sasuke._

She immediately headed for the basement, where she'd last seen Sasuke ensconced in a corner with Suigetsu and a few others, just hanging around. To her relief he was still in the same position though the crowd around him had thinned a bit, and she almost smiled at the look on his face as he tried to evade Karin's grasping hands.

"Can I talk to you for a second?" she asked directly into his ear as she leaned over the back of the couch Sasuke was reclining on. He tilted his head back and stared up at her for a moment before saying, "Sure" and shrugging Karin off, totally ignoring her pout. Tenten was so caught up in the idea of the oblivion to come that she never even noticed Neji's frown as he briefly glanced up from his blonde companion to stare after her and Sasuke.

Sasuke's hand at her back guided her swiftly and surely to his bedroom and Tenten was glad of the added support – the alcohol was beginning to make her a little woozy. The brightness of the lights in his bedroom made her squint and for a moment Sasuke was only a dark figure in front of her and Tenten couldn't help shivering – somehow the air around him seemed to swirl almost malevolently, but she'd come too far to back out now, the temptation was too great.

"What do you want?" Sasuke asked, and her vision finally adjusted so she could make out the sneer that pulled at his mouth. Her befuddled brain was a little slower in catching up but she finally noticed the glint in his eyes – the kind of glint that told her that he'd been taking hits of whatever it was that made him so aggressive. She almost winced but caught herself in time – showing weakness in front of this Sasuke was damn near suicidal.

"You know what I want," she said softly, submissively, having learned by now that this side of Sasuke preferred to be obeyed without question.

"You haven't come to me for coke in a while," Sasuke said musingly, lifting a hand to tilt her chin up so that their eyes met squarely. "Trying to kick the habit?" he asked sarcastically.

"I-I haven't needed any for a while," Tenten returned defiantly, unable to keep from rising to the barbed comment.

"But you need some tonight," Sasuke stated staring into her eyes with that same look that always made her feel as if he was sizing her up. She pulled her head away from his grasp and nodded silently, begging mentally for him to let it go and just give her what she wanted.

"Free ride's over," Sasuke said abruptly, turning away from her. Tenten jerked in surprise – he'd never asked her for money before, he didn't need her money after all but she quickly responded when she saw him sliding open the drawer where she knew he kept his stash.

"I'll pay," she was already moving forward to take the package of white powder but Sasuke whirled around and held it out of her reach.

"I don't want or need your money," he snarled down at her, "how many times do I have to say that I'm not a dealer before you'll get that through your thick skull?"

Tenten stepped back automatically, for the first time really considering the fact that she may have made a big mistake in approaching Sasuke when he was in this mood. But the small packet in his hand beckoned to her, and she was unable to take her gaze off of it – the bliss it promised was so close! She raised her eyes to Sasuke's again, and said, "Fine. Then point me in the direction of one – I'm sure there are plenty here tonight."

Sasuke shook his head slowly, "I never said I wouldn't give you any – only that I won't _sell _you any."

Confusion furrowed her brow and Tenten threw her hands up in frustration, "You said the free ride's over – what do you want then, if you don't want me to pay you?"

Shock held her immobile when Sasuke placed the packet safely in his pocket and lazily lifted one graceful finger to trace the contour of her left breast. His finger made the full circle before trailing up her throat and stopping under her chin, tilting her frozen gaze up to his. Something indefinable blazed in his onyx eyes, but Tenten wasn't so inexperienced any more that she couldn't recognize the burn of desire hidden beneath the other emotions she couldn't define.

Nervously she wetted her lips and Sasuke laughed – a low sound that vibrated across her nerve-endings. "The question now becomes: how badly do you want your fix, Tenten?" he asked silkily, allowing his hand to drift down her body until it rested on her hip.

"I-I'm not sure I understand," she said, at last, uncertainty painting her tone, making her voice low and shaky.

A rough hand fisted in her hair and Sasuke turned her head so that their lips were inches apart, "Don't be a cock-tease, Tenten. It doesn't suit you – you know very well what I mean, but let me spell it out for you anyway: the only way you're getting anything from me is if you _earn _it." The malicious tones of his voice skated over her overwrought nerves and Tenten tried not to get caught in his gaze as the battle between common sense and desperation raged in her mind. Sasuke's tongue slid out and he licked lightly at her bottom lip as if urging her on.

_What's stopping him from taking what he wants? If I play along it could be relatively painless and I'll be able to forget all about it afterward anyway …. _Her gaze dropped to his pocket again, and the image of Neji drooling over the blonde college girl flashed through her mind, and abruptly her decision was made. Anything to forget …

Her hand drifted to the zipper on his jeans, and she met Sasuke's gaze firmly, trying to ignore the tears she knew were sparkling in her eyes, "What do you want?" she asked as seductively as she could and to her relief his grip in her hair lightened slightly. Wordlessly Sasuke pushed her to her knees, leaning back against the dresser, and sucking in a breath when her busy fingers released him from the confines of his pants.

Closing her eyes, Tenten sat back on her knees and fixed her thoughts firmly on the white powder in his pocket, ignoring Sasuke's pleased groan as she took him slowly into her mouth.

* * *

Neji cursed fluently under his breath but the pair in the bedroom were far too caught up in what they were doing - they hadn't even heard him easing the door open. When Tenten and Sasuke had left the basement, he'd quickly excused himself from the blonde, unable to resist the urge to find out what they were up to. Now he regretted the impulsive decision to follow them.

Tenten's head bobbed slowly up and down and Sasuke's breathless, panted words of encouragement drifted clearly to Neji's ears even over the pounding music from below. Somehow he couldn't draw himself away – the memory of what her mouth was like, the soft, wet heat of her tongue curling around his aroused body mingled with the actual fact of what he was seeing - and to his utter disgust Neji could feel his body responding to the arousing thoughts.

But below the instinctive response to the visual stimulus lay a much darker mess of feeling, and Neji clenched his hand tightly around the doorjamb to keep from storming in and ripping her away from the flushed and panting Sasuke. He had no idea what it meant, but violence roiled in him, calling for Sasuke's blood.

_Mine_.

Neji closed his eyes, and as if the action released him from the spell he'd been bound in by the sight of Tenten shamelessly sinking to her knees for a gram of coke, he whirled and quickly strode away. There were too many factors here of which he was unsure – not the least of which was Tenten's apparent addiction – and right now he needed, badly, to just forget for a short while – there was no way he'd be able to sort through the chaos in his head in this kind of atmosphere, or in his inebriated state.

The blonde smiled invitingly when he sank down beside her and Neji was half-horrified to discover that the thoughts that he'd been mulling over hadn't done the slightest thing to still the demands of his body. Without words, without thought, he pulled the blonde into a hard kiss, groaning appreciatively into her mouth when her hand closed around his aching length. Her mouth felt strange beneath his, her touch foreign, and when the image of long, dark hair and wide hazel eyes popped into his mind he didn't even try to force the image away. Instead he gave himself over to the fantasy … pretended that it was her mouth, her hands …

_Tenten._

* * *

_**A/N: To the NejiTen fans: I'm sorry for the SasuTen moment, but it was kinda inevitable. Don't kill me *ducks* However, I stand by what I said before and wish to reassure everyone that this is, in fact, a NejiTen romance. There will not be any kind of love/deeper feeling for SasuTen, so don't worry. I hope you'll continue to bear with me despite the sucky chapter! I'm sorry – the muse seems to have deserted me today *pouts* Anyways, please review and let me know what you thought!**_


	7. Chapter 7

_**A/N: Thank you so much for all the wonderful reviews! Your support is greatly appreciated ^^ I do apologize if this chapter is a bit disjointed – blame it on the flu medication *sneeze cough* Anyways, I hope that you'll like it and I look forward to hearing what you thought, so PLEASE REVIEW!!**_

_**Warnings: All the usual ones apply**_

_**Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto**_

* * *

_**Chapter 7**_

The wind blew through the trees making the shadows cast by the moonlight dance across the carpet. All was silent, and Neji couldn't remember the last time he'd been so utterly alone with his thoughts. He'd left the blonde hours ago – he never stayed – and he hadn't been in the mood for any kind of social gathering anymore anyway.

Again and again he watched Tenten sinking gracefully to her knees, the image replaying endlessly in his mind's eye. He'd memorized every lithe movement of every muscle she used in the motion – the curve of her back, the angle of her head - but to no avail: no matter how hard he tried to focus on _Tenten_, he could not entirely forget the _reason_ she was sinking to her knees in the first place.

His fist clenched on the coverlet and he rolled onto his side, facing away from the window, as if that action would erase the pictures in his head. He honestly didn't know what was worse: that Tenten was using or that she was willing to prostitute herself for a fix.

The crazy mix of anger and regret boiled in his veins - rose in his throat and burned like acid – and that dark, depraved and hidden part of his mind whispered that maybe he wouldn't have minded so much if Tenten had willingly given in to _him_. Neji acknowledged freely that he was many things – and most of them bad – but he prided himself on his ability to face the truth: and the truth was that, with Tenten, he'd _taken _what he wanted every time – she'd never willingly capitulated to him.

He wasn't jealous, not of Sasuke – the Uchiha was insignificant and he would be dealt with in time - but the problem was that Tenten was in way over her head. Neji snorted disdainfully and rolled onto his back. Though it was mostly his fault that Tenten had ever gotten involved with this side of life, the fact remained that Uchiha Sasuke was far too good at tainting that which he touched – Neji had had front row seats to the corruption of Sakura after all, and he was under no illusion that the same thing wouldn't happen to Tenten.

There was only one thing for it: he had to get her away from the Uchiha before she was in too far to ever get out. The last remnants of selflessness that remained in him demanded it. Unfortunately, that was the one course of action that he would not willingly undertake, not if there was another way. Neji sat up, pushed his hair back, and pounded the pillow into shape: the alien feeling of actually caring what another person did with their life made him feel uncomfortable in his own skin, and he decided that he'd sleep on it before making any firm decisions.

* * *

_Two weeks later …_

Tenten walked slightly behind Sasuke as they entered the same smoky club she'd visited with him months before. It seemed like a lifetime ago. Her mouth twisted bitterly as she reflected on what her life had become – not only was she no closer to making Neji beg (he avoided her like the plague these days), she was also falling deeper and deeper into a world that she knew she had very little control over.

Her mother and stepfather were continually fighting over her – her mother maintaining that every teenager had the right to some experimentation and her stepfather countering that coming home at three am, if she came home at all - usually wasted – could not be classified as a little experimentation. Tenten had never been so glad that her mother was one of the people who saw only what she wanted to see – she convinced herself that Tenten had only been a little tipsy a couple of times, and so she refused to stop her daughter from 'experiencing life' as she put it. Her stepfather had a much better grasp of the situation though and the resulting fights left Tenten feeling so guilty that she immediately promised herself to stop this insanity right away.

Only that never seemed to work – for a day or two she would stick religiously to her new decision but soon enough the loneliness became unbearable and her firm resolve crumbled - before she knew it she'd be back at the Uchiha mansion. She shot a resentful look at the back of Sasuke's head, but it was useless to blame him. She knew that. He'd warned her, he'd tried to put her off, and she'd refused to listen. No, she had only herself to blame for this – though she didn't deceive herself into thinking that Sasuke didn't get off on the power trip she provided.

Thankfully, he hadn't required her to 'earn' her highs again – it seemed he was satisfied by the humiliation he'd already visited on her. Tenten shuddered slightly at the memory. Desperately trying to keep the mental images at bay she focused instead on the scantily clad figures writhing on the dance-floor, crowding around the bar, having fun. Smoke from the strategically placed machines writhed like snakes around the shadowy forms and Tenten shivered again: it seemed like spectral shackles held them bound in place. She shook her head to rid it of the fanciful notions and looked ahead, automatically holding on to Sasuke's arm as they started to wind through the crowds, making for the stairs.

They reached the stairs and Sasuke pulled her ahead of him, giving her a light push to indicate she should precede him – it was strange, how Sasuke managed to be both a gentleman and a total cad. But she wasn't going to complain: with him at her back it was that much harder for anyone to try looking up her skirt. Sasuke no longer needed to force her into short skirts or revealing dresses but somehow she never could quite get used to baring so much skin. She climbed the stairs slowly, staring straight ahead, but all too aware of the stares that followed their progress. Sasuke was a familiar sight to most people, and he drew attention like a magnet wherever he went but Tenten had quickly found that she hated being stared at.

They swept past the bouncer guarding the door to the VIP room without pause. It never failed to amaze Tenten how easy it was to get in anywhere when you were with Sasuke: her first trip to the club had been clouded by innocence and she'd never given a thought to fake ID's or anything of the sort, it was only later on that she'd noticed how strange it was that they were simply allowed in. She shrugged the idle thought away and headed straight for the bar – tonight she badly needed a drink.

Glass of champagne firmly in hand she turned to sweep her gaze across the room, looking for familiar faces. Sasuke had business to take care of first and, as always, she was expected to entertain herself while he bought or traded, or whatever it was that he did to get the drug supply replenished. She spotted Ino's long, blonde hair across the room, the golden waves shimmering in the flashing lights, and she quickly began to make her way toward the other girl.

Ino noticed her advance when she was still out of earshot but gave her outfit an approving once-over; the short black skirt and strapless blue-black sparkly top _did _look rather good, Tenten had to admit, and she silently thanked Sakura for taking pity on her and helping her shop. A quick hug was all the greeting the girls needed, and without a word being said Ino tugged Tenten along in her wake, making her way toward the dance-floor that could only be accessed from the VIP room. It was more of a balcony really – it overlooked the main dance-floor below – but here there was a lot more space in which to move.

Tenten glanced around for a place to deposit her empty glass as Ino went to join Sakura who was already in the middle of the dance-floor and attracting admiring male attention. With a slight smile Tenten shook her head – a couple of weeks ago she might have been wondering how on earth Sakura managed to look so seductive while dancing but she'd used the time with her new friends to good effect. Every day had been a new learning experience, as she soaked up the information Ino and Sakura supplied, not only through their advice and opinions but also through the way they moved, walked, talked. All of it had helped Tenten reach the point she found herself at tonight: no longer the outsider, she looked like she belonged. She _did _belong.

Firmly pushing the melancholy thoughts away, Tenten moved to join her friends. She'd come here to enjoy herself – and enjoy herself she would … even if it killed her.

* * *

Neji leaned against a pillar, hand clenched around a tumbler full of amber liquid. The shadows hid him well, and he used the opportunity to watch Tenten undetected. She seemed sad, somehow, as if she was constantly searching for something without really knowing what was missing. He ground his teeth together as she joined the group in the middle of the dance-floor, fake smile already in place.

She used to be spontaneous, excited about everything, honest to a fault – so incredibly beautiful that he'd found himself unable to resist her in the long run. But now – though she was still beautiful, that was undeniable - she was guarded, and her beauty had changed, had become … darker, somehow. Staring at her now, Neji couldn't help but feel like she was more the dream-like succubae than the flesh and blood girl. He instinctively withdrew from her – sure that if he allowed her too close she would consume him utterly. And, much as his cowardice irked him, he'd decided to stop playing with fire, and so he'd avoided her wherever possible.

The dreams that haunted his sleep where simply that – dreams: remnants of half-forgotten sensations, words and events, and Neji refused to allow them to scare him into doing something stupid. And he was sure that, if he got any more involved with Tenten, he _would _wind up doing some very stupid things. He sucked in a breath as he watched her dancing form, firmly resisting the urge to go over there and pull her close.

In an angry movement he turned away, staring at the floor with unseeing eyes instead. It was beyond frustrating; feeling the almost physical pain of her absence mingled with the resentment it caused. Damnit, he didn't _want _to feel this way! Didn't want to care about her well-being, her state of mind … he didn't want to worry about what she was doing or who she was with.

_It's your punishment_, he reminded himself, fighting to keep the stoic mask from turning into a grimace. No way around that – it was his fault, his mistake, and though he knew that it was irrational he couldn't shake the feeling that no matter how he avoided it, it would fall to him to get her away from everything that threatened to destroy her. It didn't help to tell himself that she was strong, that she would survive, because he knew her. Knew that she did not have the kind of strength to resist the temptations every day was placing in her way - and that was his fault too.

He remembered a time, when he'd still been fighting with himself about her, that she'd looked …happy. And he'd taken that away. Had made her unhappy enough to immerse herself in his darkness, in this half-life, where happiness and enjoyment could easily be induced through liquid, powdered and compressed forms but lacked the reality or truth of natural emotions.

As if to confirm his thoughts, his head turned involuntarily back to Tenten, and he cursed under his breath when his gaze met hers. She stared at him for a calculated moment before slowly starting in his direction. _Why can't you just leave me the fuck alone?_ He snarled at her, but only in his head. Watching her approach warily, he feigned indifference and took a slow mouthful from the tumbler still clenched in his hand.

Never breaking the eye contact, Tenten stopped inches away from him, one hand sliding between them to rest lightly on his chest, for balance, as she stood on her toes to speak directly into his ear.

"You've been avoiding me."

Neji inclined his head slightly, trying not to inhale her scent too obviously, "You're imagining things."

She shook her head slowly, and when someone bumped into her as they passed she arched her body against his in a movement so slight that Neji almost thought _he _was the one imagining things. Her laugh vibrated across the skin of his throat and he swallowed almost convulsively. Her hand trailed over his chest, across his collarbone, and he was so absorbed in watching the slender fingers' path he nearly forgot to listen when she spoke again.

"I think you're scared," she watched him from beneath lowered lashes and Neji couldn't keep his temper from flaring. "Of what? You? Don't delude yourself," he murmured snidely into her hair, already untangling himself so he could get some distance in which to think.

Tenten caught onto his arm, interrupting his escape, and she smiled at him, the dancing lights casting patches of multi-colored shadows across her features so he couldn't read the sincerity of the gesture. Her voice was mocking, "Why are you fighting what you want, Neji?" she walked closer, their bodies just brushing as she moved past him. She turned her head slightly to send him an inviting look, not bothering to veil the laughter that lurked below the invitation, and Neji's temper nearly got the better of him. His eyes narrowed as he glared after her, not entirely able to keep his gaze from lingering on her legs.

* * *

"He's still watching you," Ino reported from the corner of her mouth when Tenten rejoined them. Tenten allowed herself a small smile in acknowledgement and firmly resisted the urge to glance over her shoulder to confirm the blonde's words. Instead, she gave herself over to the beat of the music, closing her eyes, and allowing her other senses to search for Neji's presence. When she concentrated she could _feel _his gaze burning into her.

She allowed Ino to dance her slowly in a circle until she was facing in Neji's direction and Ino had her back to him. Always aware of his eyes Tenten tried to remember every move Sakura and Ino had taught her. Her hips swayed seductively and she winked at Ino as the latter began to move around her again.

Back to back, the girls swayed together, quickly attracting attention from everyone. Making sure that Neji could still see her through the last gap in the rapidly forming crowd, Tenten leaned back against Ino, her hands trailing suggestively down her body, over her hips, her head falling back slightly, the promise blatant in her eyes.

For an instant, just before the gap closed, she could've sworn she saw Neji close his eyes as if he was in pain, but when a gap opened up again he was gone.

* * *

She just would not _stop _tempting him; and Neji hated it. He hated that she had some kind of inexplicable hold over him. Hated how his body responded to her quite against his will – in fact, at the moment, he hated just about everything Tenten. He could feel her calling to him, beckoning him … to his destruction? He didn't know – he only knew that he ached to touch her again, to feel her silky skin, to hear her breathless moans of pleasure….

With a muted groan he turned back to the bar, motioning for another shot and quickly tossed it back but the alcohol did not bring any clarity, did not make him feel any different. In fact, it only served to intensify the feeling of emptiness, the wanting...

He dropped his head onto his arms, aware he must appear a total drunk, but not really caring at the moment. Every sane thought in his head screamed at him to get the hell out of there, but his head and his body were not in accordance with each other tonight; an unsettling experience. The fragile hold he had on his control stretched a bit more, and Neji finally gathered the strength to turn and make for the door.

Moving quickly he started the descent barely looking where he was going. A bright, white flash of light caught a shimmering blue-black at the corner of his sight and his head turned involuntarily. Somewhere during his bid to drown himself in alcohol, Tenten and Ino had moved down to the main dance-floor and the sight of Tenten laughing as she wound a leg around one of the shiny poles that flanked the left side of the floor was too much. His control stretched some more, and abruptly snapped. Almost before the decision to give in had been properly made Neji had already reached the bottom of the staircase, and begun to fight his way through the crowd.

* * *

The lights spun and shattered into little shards that made interesting crisscrossing patterns on Ino's pale skin, and Tenten couldn't keep from laughing as her friend struck an exaggerated pose, winding her body around one of the shiny poles that the dancers used. Holding on to her own pole to keep from sliding to the floor in a puddle of artificial merriment, Tenten tossed her hair over her shoulder and wound a leg around the pole, giving Ino a fake pout.

Suddenly, she could feel Neji again. He was looking at her – she just didn't know from where. Not wanting to give the game away, she adopted a sultry look and shimmied down the pole much to Ino's hilarity. Tenten bit her lip to keep from laughing too; it felt completely ridiculous but she managed to keep the amusement to herself as she repeated the move.

The next time she turned her head, Neji was in front of her, impossibly close, their lips only inches apart. His eyes blazed with undefined emotions and Tenten shivered slightly when she recognized anger as the dominant one. Hiding her trepidation she stared up at him challengingly, and gasped when his hands shot out to cup her cheeks, drawing her roughly closer.

"Satisfied?" he muttered against her mouth, and Tenten was gratified by the way his lips curved in a slight smile when she breathed back, "Not yet." He claimed her mouth in a bruising kiss, and Tenten forgot about anything else as she stood on her toes to wind her arms around his neck. Neji backed her up against the pole, and, uncaring of the crowds around them, hitched one leg over his hip, groaning into her mouth.

Tenten had always imagined she would feel triumphant when Neji finally surrendered to her, and yet, all she felt was elation. She dragged her mouth away, panting, and registered the coil of his hair in her hands; she'd never even noticed winding it around her fingers. She dropped her leg, Neji only slightly fighting her, and then he finally drew away.

"Come with me," he said, eyes full of command but tone strangely subdued, the undertones of pleading not entirely disguised. Mutely, Tenten nodded and followed him unresistingly when he began towing her through the crowds toward the entrance.

The walk seemed to take forever, as if every person in the club had been set on hindering their escape. Finally outside, Tenten took deep breaths of the fresh air, ignoring the way it made her head spin. She was too caught up in staring at Neji's back, at the way his hair flowed over his shoulders …

She yelped when he suddenly turned and pulled her after him – into a dark alleyway. Then she was in his arms, the contrast of his heated body pressing her into the cool stone behind her making her shiver. His hands buried in her hair and he stared at her mouth as if fascinated, before slowly lowering his head until their lips touched in a soft, chaste kiss.

The gesture – the sweetness of the fleeting touch of his lips – took Tenten by surprise, and in a bid to stop the softening of her heart she wound her arms around his neck, drawing his head down, intent on reigniting the sparks that had flared only moments before.

Neji resisted and Tenten glared up at him in barely disguised panic, if he was suddenly going to revert back to the first Neji she had no hope of escaping unscathed. The shreds of dignity she'd managed to hang on to would be totally destroyed, and her heart … she didn't think that her heart could take another beating.

"Why?" Neji panted the word, staring intently into her eyes, "Why … with Sasuke … why would you do that?"

The shock immobilized her to such an extent that it never even occurred to her to play dumb and Tenten simply dropped her gaze from his, glad that the darkness hid the flush on her cheeks. She struggled slightly, trying to get free, but Neji's hold tightened until she felt as if she was encased in steel bands. Her breathing quickened and she wet her lips nervously, "How do you know about that?" she finally managed to whisper past the obstruction in her throat.

Bitter laughter shook his frame, "Know that? I _saw_ that," he bit out, and Tenten prayed that the ground would open and swallow her whole – anything to escape from Neji and the accusatory tone in his voice. The shock was beginning to fade, and anger to kindle, "What do you care?" Tenten snapped, "I owe you nothing!"

She finally gathered enough courage to raise her eyes defiantly to Neji's but her knees buckled at the mixture of anger, hurt and confusion she read there, and she was suddenly glad of Neji's almost bruising hold that kept her upright.

"If you needed a hit that badly you could've come to me," Neji returned at last, the mask slipping back into place. Tenten merely shook her head, an instinctive denial, and Neji's mouth twisted. "Why do that at all though?" he asked, almost thoughtfully, "why did you ever get involved with drugs in the first place? Why are you even here?!" his voice rang with the frustration he felt and his grip tightened even more, so that Tenten squirmed uncomfortably until he loosened his hold slightly.

"Why, Tenten?" he whispered into her hair as he drew her head down to his shoulder.

Goaded beyond endurance, and the alcohol not helping her sense of discretion, Tenten felt the control over her thoughts and feelings slipping from her grasp. The tears began to fall as she rained weak, ineffectual blows on his chest. The sobs ripped from deep inside and everything that she'd held back for so long came pouring forth.

"Because I'd do anything to be with you," Tenten whispered the words, punctuated by broken sobs, into his shirt but she knew he'd heard her when his body stiffened. For a moment she was sure that he would draw away, would leave her broken and alone yet again, but then his hand began to stroke comfortingly over her hair, and, to her intense surprise, Neji held her as she let the tears fall where they willed.

* * *

_**A/N: *peeks at readers from between her fingers* So, what did you think? Was it terrible? Merely bad? Or, I hope, a little interesting? At the very least this chapter explained the title, lol. Let me know either way! =D**_


	8. Chapter 8

_**A/N: You guys are amazing! Thank you so much for all the reviews/alerts/favorites – you really made my day ^^ Another ridiculously quick update – I'm being threatened with broomsticks and chainsaws XD. Luckily I'm still home with the flu so I could get this one posted today ^^. About this chapter … erm … yeah, I'm not too sure about it, but I'll wait for your opinions! Hope you enjoy and PLEASE REVIEW – it works much better than flu meds =D**_

_**Warnings: Trust me – it's rated M for a reason: don't read if you've got a problem with anything that might crop up in an M-rated fic … though there's no lime or lemons in this one. Sorry! ^^**_

_**Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto**_

* * *

_**Chapter 8**_

When the tears were finally spent, Tenten made as if to draw away but Neji wouldn't let her. His hands cupped her cheeks gently and his thumbs stroked at the tear-tracks, "I'm sorry," he whispered finally, his voice low.

Hesitantly Tenten raised her eyes to his, unable to stop the hope from surging. His eyes were remote, with only a hint of regret and Tenten could feel the hope withering away as quickly as it had sprung to life. She shook her head, not only in denial but also in an attempt to get free, "No, you're not."

Her bitter whisper made him jerk but still he refused to let go, tilting her chin up till their eyes met again. "I'm sorry that you feel that way," he clarified quietly, and finally let go, stepping away from her. Neji opened his mouth, only to close it again, as if the words would not come, and Tenten stared warily up at him – she knew by now that anything he had to say wasn't likely to be something she wanted to hear.

For an interminable moment they stared at each other in silence, then Neji was turning, his hair fanning out behind him with the suppressed violence of the motion and somehow seeming to cling to the shadows - lengthening them. Tenten shivered, she could not help it, the way he looked … it was as if the shadows themselves were claiming him, drawing him deeper - farther away from her.

"I'll take you back," he threw over his shoulder, breaking into her thoughts and releasing her from the despair the image invoked. Without looking at her again Neji began to walk away, but Tenten remained where she was – rooted in place, hands digging into the cold stone behind her.

"Neji," she called after him, hesitantly. For a moment she thought she hadn't spoken loudly enough but then he stopped, and waited, still not looking at her. "Do you – do you think maybe you could give me a ride home?" she asked in a small voice. The last thing she felt like doing was going back into the smoky haze. She did not have the emotional strength to keep up the charade at the moment.

"Of course."

His reply was a long time coming, but Tenten sighed in relief at his assent and pushed away from the wall to following him out of the dark alleyway into the pooled light from the streetlamps shining from above.

* * *

The car drew to a halt on the gravel of Tenten's driveway and Neji killed the soft purr of the engine immediately. No need to wake her parents. Instead of moving, both of them remained as they were, staring straight ahead – a nearly palpable tension in the air.

Tenten was the first to break the silence, and the small, almost broken tone of her voice made Neji's muscles contract almost painfully. "Do you think maybe you could stay?" she asked, and quickly added, "Just for tonight."

He was quiet for so long that Tenten began to fumble with her seatbelt, eager to just get away from him – it seemed as if no matter what she did she was doomed to making a total fool of herself with Neji. His hand shot out, the warmth of his fingers curling around her own, stilling her frantic movements. Slowly, deliberately, he drew her hand away from the buckle and placed it gently in her lap. His hair swung over his shoulder – hiding his expression – and he quickly unsnapped the harness for her.

"Just for tonight," he warned softly as, the task complete, he glanced up at her through the curtain of hair.

* * *

Tenten's bedroom was a lot like the girl herself – a confusing mixture of woman and child, dark and light. Various pieces of childhood paraphernalia were in evidence here and there – a teddy bear seated on the rocking chair in the corner, the pink curtains – but it was interspersed with pieces of her new life: revealing clothes draped over the back of the rocking chair, make-up littering the surfaces of the dresser.

Neji's curious sweep of the room was interrupted when Tenten turned off the overhead light – the yellow pool from the bedside lamps not doing much to hold the darkness at bay. Still standing in the doorway, Neji watched as Tenten wearily shrugged out of her clothes – and he hated how his body jerked in response, so he quickly averted his eyes, made a show of closing the door softly behind him. When he turned around again Tenten was thankfully already under the covers, and he took a deep breath – steeling himself for the ordeal to come.

Pulling his shirt off as he went, kicking his shoes off by the side of the bed, Neji finally could delay no longer, and he got hesitantly in beside her. A small, contented smile lifted Tenten's lips, making the silvery tear-tracks that were still visible on her cheeks shimmer slightly in the dim light. She closed her eyes and curled up in a ball against him, her breath brushing against his skin as she whispered a low, "Thank you."

Almost automatically Neji shifted: his arm going around her, holding her close. Her arm slid over him, the weight somehow reassuring on his stomach, the patterns she traced on his chest warming him in ways he'd never thought a person _could _be warmed. Pulling her tightly against him, he rested his cheek on her sweet-smelling hair, and whispered again, "Just for tonight." His tone conveyed the warning perfectly – he had to be sure that she didn't read too much into this. He didn't want to complicate the entire mess even further.

"I know," she whispered back sleepily, not quite managing to hide the sadness that lurked beneath the words.

It was strange; never before had Neji felt the need to explain himself to anyone, but here, the one time when someone wasn't asking for explanations of his thoughts and actions, he felt compelled to elaborate.

"I'm not good for you, Tenten. You should be with someone who can take you into the light."

She didn't reply, and Neji winced when he felt the wetness dripping onto his chest. His arms tightened around her, and he brushed his mouth over her hair.

"Sleep now," he whispered, "tomorrow is soon enough."

Her head jerked up and she stared anxiously into his eyes, "You _will_ stay?" she asked, just a slight quiver in her voice, "at least until I'm properly asleep?"

Neji's mouth lifted in a wry smile – she really did know him far too well - but he nodded nonetheless. Without really understanding why he was making life so difficult for himself – for both of them – but unable to deny her anything she wanted at the moment, he leaned forward slightly to press a light kiss to her lips.

"I'll be here when you wake up," he promised, pushing her back into a lying position.

"Good," her voice was sleepy again, "I want to be able to say goodbye."

Neji closed his eyes and forced the bewildering emotions away; why on earth would the thought of saying goodbye to Tenten make him feel so …. Neji gave up on figuring out what exactly it made him feel and firmly reminded himself that saying goodbye to Tenten was exactly what he wanted.

* * *

"Tenten!"

The knocking at the door jerked Tenten from peaceful dreams and as soon as she sat upright, she became aware of the heated body next to her. Memory rushed back and she quickly turned her head around, a soft smile lighting her features when she saw Neji sleeping quietly beside her.

The knocking intensified, drawing Tenten back from her thoughts and before she'd even begun to formulate a plan a few things happened simultaneously: Neji's eyes opened and he gave her a sleepy, smile – a _genuine _smile that knocked the breath out of her. The knocking ceased, changed to the sound of the doorknob turning. Her mother's voice was filled with impatience, "Tenten – someone left their car in the drive – your stepfather can't get out. Did one of your friends sleep over?"

To Tenten's horror the door swung open before she had the chance to get to it and stop her mother from entering. Her gaze flew automatically to Neji's – looking for reassurance – and somehow, the almost imperceptible hardening of his gaze gave her the strength to turn her eyes back to the door.

Her mother, husband just behind her, was framed in the doorway – their faces identical masks of shock. Tenten could feel the blush beginning to rise up into her cheeks. For a long moment the four of them did nothing but stare at each other, then Tenten finally gathered all her courage, "It's not what it looks like," she began but her mother held up a hand, and without a word to anyone whirled around, stalking off down the hall.

Neji gave her hand a light squeeze under the covers before he sat up too and in a graceful movement swung his legs off the bed. Something almost like relief flashed across her stepfather's features when he saw that being shirtless was the full extent of Neji's state of undress, and Tenten couldn't help but be grateful to Neji for trying to make the situation seem better.

"I'll get my car out of the way," he said, quietly, pulling his shirt over his head.

Her stepfather cleared his throat, "Yes, I think it best if you leave now," he said just as quietly, and Tenten closed her eyes so that she wouldn't have to see Neji walking away from her for the last time. Another throat clearing sound made her eyes open a couple of minutes later and her gaze collided with her stepfather's stern one.

"Enough is enough, Tenten," he said "please join your mother and me in the breakfast room as soon as you are dressed." He turned and walked away and Tenten found that she could care less about their censure – the only thing that mattered was that Neji was leaving.

She jumped out of bed, dragging the sheet with her, and rushed to her window just in time to see Neji pause before he got into the driver's seat. Their eyes met, held, spoke volumes, and then he was in the car, starting the engine and backing slowly down the drive.

Tenten watched until his car was out of sight, leaning her forehead against the cooling glass of the window, trying to force the tears back. _At least you got your goodbye_, she thought to herself as she pushed away from the window through sheer force of will and began to prepare for the inevitable fallout that awaited her downstairs.

* * *

The fallout could've been worse and, as the weeks passed slowly, things gradually began to settle down into a pattern. Tenten was no longer left alone so much, her mother stayed with her more often than not when her stepfather had to travel, she was grounded and a curfew in place for when the grounding lifted.

Strangely, they had been willing to accept Neji despite the entire debacle, and it had been incredibly painful to try and explain – without giving too much away – that she would not be seeing Neji again. She had no idea what her mother thought of that – if her mother was despairing about her daughter being a slut – but Tenten found that she didn't care.

All plans for paying Neji back were off – instead she was doing her utmost to avoid him and any place he was likely to be. This was potentially problematic as she'd never needed the cocaine high more than now – fake happiness, even for just an hour, was preferable to no happiness at all. Tenten started visiting the Uchiha mansion in the afternoons, just after school – quite aware of the speculative gaze Sasuke raked her with on these trips – so that she could avoid socializing with Neji and still be home in time for her mother's arrival.

She was quite sure that things would not continue to work out so perfectly; Sasuke wouldn't be content with providing her highs with nothing in return forever, and she was quite aware that she was failing badly at hiding how miserable she was. Walking down the hallways at school, she could feel the gazes on her back. Ino and Sakura couldn't understand why she was no longer hanging out with them – Tenten couldn't bring herself to tell them about what had happened – and a few times Temari had even looked as if she wanted to approach her but thought better of it at the last moment.

There was only one small light at the end of the tunnel: her dad was due for a visit at the end of the month. She dreaded it, and yet looked forward to it. She had to get away – had to get out – and she was quite determined to be on the plane with him the next time he flew out.

* * *

Neji watched Tenten as she walked slowly down the hallway to her locker. No matter how often he'd forbidden himself from even thinking about her, he couldn't help anxiously awaiting her arrival at school each morning. Every time he saw her something in him seemed to tighten – every day seemed to see her paler, thinner, the circles around her eyes darker. He'd hoped that by taking himself out of her life, she would move on – go back to the way her life had been - but he knew that she was still visiting the Uchiha mansion.

He leaned his head back against the bank of lockers, cursing inwardly. He had no idea how to make things better for her – she seemed utterly unable to help herself – and while he had warned Sasuke to stay away from her, he hadn't strength to check on whether the Uchiha was complying with his wishes or not. If he had solid proof that she was still using, it would become reality and then he would have to do something about it, so he settled for convincing himself that she was just unhappy and would get over it in time.

He watched as she shifted her books to her left arm so that she could twirl the combination on her locker, his eyes narrowed as if he was trying to memorize every detail of her appearance. The books were balanced precariously and, when they started to slip, she automatically tightened her hold, head jerking down to watch.

She winced as the edge of a book dug into her wrist and Neji's eyes narrowed even further – why would she wince? Not only was her arm covered in bangles, the book couldn't have pressed into her skin that hard. She shifted her arm and he saw just a slight edge of white gauze peeking from beneath the layers of bracelets before she shook them back into place.

Every particle of his being screamed at him to go to her – to _help _her – but he remained rooted to the spot. One thing he was sure of though: something was very wrong with Tenten.

* * *

Temari jumped when she closed her locker door only to come face to face with a much too close Hyuuga Neji.

"What?" she snapped, regaining control of her jumping pulse.

"Tenten," Neji began without a preamble, leaning one shoulder casually against the locker next to hers, his arms crossed. "Something's wrong – you should check it out."

Silently seething for a moment before responding, Temari turned to glare him full in the face, "And if something is wrong – whose fault is that?" she asked bitingly.

Neji's eyes closed for a moment but when he opened them again they were as expressionless as always. "Fair enough. Still, for her sake, I'm asking you to see if she's okay."

Temari's eyes narrowed and she stared searchingly at him for a long time. Sighing she replied at last, "Tenten doesn't want me checking if she's okay."

"Times change," was all the answer she got as Neji turned and walked away. Temari stared after him, worrying her lower lip between her teeth – much as she hated swallowing her pride, the mere fact that Neji had gone to the trouble of seeking her out must mean that he was seriously worried.

Swiftly making up her mind to go see Tenten that afternoon, Temari briskly strode off in the opposite direction, heading for her last class but unable to get her attention focused on school-work as she ran through possible scenarios in her head. Each was worse than the last, and finally she gave up and merely allowed her thoughts to run in one continuously worried stream as she pretended to pay attention to the lesson.

* * *

It took Temari nearly two hours after school ended to gather herself sufficiently to feel able to visit Tenten. The housekeeper let her in, as usual, she had no idea where Tenten's parents were, but she knew the way and merely thanked the woman as she began to climb the stairs to Tenten's bedroom.

The music was pounding, and she was quite sure that Tenten wouldn't be able to hear her knock over the loud noise, so Temari pushed the door open without waiting for an invitation to enter. She winced as her gaze lighted on the mess inside. Though Tenten had never been particularly neat, she wasn't a slob either, but the mess of books, magazines, CD's , clothes, shoes and make-up that littered every available surface and took up most of the floor-space spoke volumes about how things had changed.

Tenten was nowhere to be seen, and Temari closed the door softly behind her, noting that the door to Tenten's en-suite was slightly ajar. She settled herself on the bed – the only part of the room where there was space to sit, and waited for Tenten to come out.

The minutes passed agonizingly slowly and Temari began to wonder whether Tenten was there at all. The song came to an end, the pounding of drums, the wail of an electric guitar, and the thumping of the bass fading away. In the small millisecond of silence between tracks a low, pain-filled moan reached Temari's ears from the direction of the bathroom, as if providence had timed it that way, only to be drowned out as a new song began.

Fear crept down her spine and Temari stood swiftly, hesitating for only a second outside the bathroom door before she pushed it inward, readying herself for whatever lay on the other side, waiting to greet her.

Tenten sat on the floor, back against the bathtub, wearing only a tank-top and some short-shorts, her hair a tangled mess of curls on her shoulders. Her face was pale, wan, drawn, the dark circles under her eyes more noticeable than ever. But this wasn't what kept Temari rooted to the spot. Nor was it the mixture of fear, pleading, hurt and anger that darkened Tenten's gaze as she stared up at the blonde girl frozen in the doorway.

No, what kept Temari from moving, kept her in frozen disbelief, was what Tenten was doing. The bracelets she'd taken to wearing were in a messy heap at her hip, next to a roll of gauze, some disinfectant and cotton-wool.

Almost defiantly, Tenten kept her gaze firmly locked with Temari's as she slowly drew the razor she held in her left hand in a light line across the inside of her right wrist. Temari's eyes widened in horror – the thing must've been sharp because a bright ribbon of blood almost immediately appeared to join the other crisscrossing shapes, but most noticeable was the large N Tenten had traced smack in the middle of the newly made and half-healed scratches.

Temari's knees buckled and she held on to the doorjamb for dear life as she slowly slid to the ground. "God, Tenny," was all she managed to choke out past the lump in her throat, and Tenten simply leaned her head back on the lip of the bathtub and allowed one, small tear to trickle down her pale cheek.

"The only way, Mari," she whispered hoarsely, "to let it out … to stop using."

Finally regaining control of her arms, at least, Temari crawled over to Tenten, and drew the other girl into a tight hug – allowing her own tears to fall and mingle with the heartbroken sobs that shook Tenten's entire body.

* * *

_**A/N: So, what did you think? *peeks at readers warily* I'm fairly sure you're all hating me right now, but don't worry – it should all work out okay in the end. I hope. LOL. Just kidding! Please leave me a review – even if just to tell me how bad it sucked!**_


	9. Chapter 9

_**A/N: Thank you so so so much for all of the reviews/alerts/favorites! And, I'm so sorry about the delay in updating! So, without further ado, I'll let you get on with reading chapter 9 ^^ I hope that you'll enjoy it and please don't forget to leave me a REVIEW!**_

**_Warnings: all the usual ones apply_**

**_Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto_**

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_**Chapter 9**_

Dawn light flooded through the windows, bathing the room in a rosy glow that was somehow resplendent with hope. Tenten stared at the dust motes dancing in the air, feeling at peace for the first time in weeks. She'd never placed much store in clichés but, after a nearly sleepless night spent talking, she had to admit that she felt better for having told Temari everything.

She shifted onto her side, careful not to wake her friend, and slowly slid out of the bed. The floor was ice-cold when she stepped onto it – in stark contrast to the warm light filling the room, and the even warmer bed she'd just left – but Tenten ignored it as she made her way to the bathroom. Almost hesitantly she pushed the door open. More than a minute passed as Tenten hovered on the threshold, making up her mind. Finally, she squared her shoulders, lifted her chin in determination, and marched inside before her resolve wavered.

Everything was just as she'd left it – just as it had been when Temari had finally gathered enough strength to pull Tenten to her feet and out into the bedroom the previous evening. The disinfectant, the gauze, the bangles … all still lay in haphazard piles on the floor. The razor-blade rested on the edge of the bathtub, shining with a cold, blueish light that made Tenten shudder. She quickly picked it up, holding it gingerly between thumb and forefinger. Another endless moment passed as she stared at the piece of metal and relived its sharp bite and the anguished relief that inevitably followed the pain. Her wrist ached and, with an almost convulsive movement, Tenten threw the small object into the trashcan in the corner, where it lay winking innocently in the glare from the overhead lights. As if the movement had released her from the internal wrangling, Tenten's actions followed in quick succession: she gathered the strings of the plastic bin-liner together and tied them with decisive flicks of her wrists before carrying the bag through her bedroom and out into the hall.

By the time she reached the kitchen door she was almost running, holding the bag away from her body. It was with a sigh of heartfelt relief that she finally deposited the bag in the big cans in the back courtyard. Without turning around, or glancing back even once, Tenten re-entered the house through the kitchen and ran up the stairs to her bedroom with light feet – nearly flying with the sense of relief that flowed through her.

* * *

"I can't help you unless you talk to me, Tenten."

The gentle voice was strangely at odds with the clinical surroundings. Tenten shifted her gaze from one side of the room to the other in a last-ditch effort to avoid the woman's piercing gaze. She hated the feeling that the woman was seeing right through her – that she could read all of her thoughts as if Tenten was an open book. The walls were off-white, the carpet brown, the office furniture functional, and there was nothing that Tenten could pretend interest in to avoid speaking to the psychologist.

At last she took a deep breath and forced her eyes to meet the gray ones that were fixed intently on her face. The doctor was in her mid-thirties, Tenten judged, with soft brown hair and even softer gray eyes. She had a kind face – the sort of face that Tenten couldn't help but instinctively trust - but the white lab coat and the psychology journals that filled the small room kept reminding her of where she was; destroying the trust before it could take root.

After they'd had breakfast, Temari had insisted that she speak to the guidance counselor at school. Tenten had protested vehemently, she could take care of her problems on her own, and the last thing she needed was for her mother to find out. But in the end Temari had simply dragged her to the school office only to find out that the counselor was on leave and that a psychologist at a small clinic nearby was seeing students for the duration.

Temari had taken a still protesting Tenten straight to the clinic and now she found herself uncomfortably trying to meet the steady gaze in front of her. Childishly Tenten wanted nothing more than to unburden herself to this woman, to an adult that could make all the problems go away – she was sure the doctor wouldn't judge her, not overtly at least – and the temptation to give in and allow someone to take care of her weighed heavily on her heart. But she was afraid – there were too many secrets involved here. The last thing Tenten wanted was to get anyone in trouble, and the full story would result in quite a bit of trouble for everyone she involved in the entire sorry tale. So, she stayed silent, wondering frantically what would be safe to tell, so she did not give anything away inadvertently.

"Are you happy, Tenten?" the doctor asked when no answer was forthcoming and leaned her elbows on the desk between them, cupping her chin in her hand.

Involuntary tears filled Tenten's eyes and she blinked them angrily away, shaking her head in the negative, so the doctor would understand she wasn't being deliberately unhelpful.

A deep sigh from the other side of the desk was the only indication that the doctor acknowledged her response, and Tenten kept her eyes carefully on her hands, afraid to start tearing up again.

"Are you unhappy because of a boy? Or your parents? Or friends?"

The probing was gentle and Tenten couldn't help the slight smile that pulled at her lips. "All of the above," she returned quietly, speaking for the first time since Temari had introduced her to the doctor, announced that she needed help, and high-tailed it out of the office, leaving Tenten to deal with the doctor's startled gaze filled with questions.

"Well, that sounds fairly normal to me," the doctor said, smiling reassuringly at Tenten who returned the gesture hesitantly.

"Maybe the boy more than the others," Tenten ventured, her gaze flitting from side to side as she shifted uncomfortably.

The white lab coat rustled and Tenten imagined her leaning back in her big, black chair, a thoughtful look on her face.

"Want to tell me a bit more about this boy? Did you meet him recently, for example?"

Tenten shook her head, in confusion more than refusal, opened her mouth only to snap it shut, and shrugged helplessly, "No, I've known him since we were kids, but we haven't really travelled in the same social circles in the last few years. So, I guess you could say we only reconnected recently."

The silence that met the statement unnerved Tenten and she shifted uncomfortably again. "I fell for him and then …" the blurted statement trailed off into uncertainty.

"He got mean? Did he hurt you?" the tone sharpened considerably and Tenten winced as she voiced the quick denial that sprang almost automatically to her lips.

"No! He wouldn't hurt me – not physically."

"Emotional abuse is still abuse, Tenten."

All sharpness had melted from the doctor's voice again and the soft concern that was barely discernable filled Tenten's eyes with tears again.

"No," she repeated, softly but firmly, though her voice shook from the repressed tears, "it's not like that. He just doesn't want to be with me, that's all."

"Did he say that?"

Tenten shook her head, at a loss of how to explain all that had passed between her and Neji. A pounding headache began just over her left eye and she rubbed at it impatiently, not noticing the way the doctor's gaze sharpened again when she noted the white bandages that covered the girl's wrist.

"No … I … he said that he's not good for me," Tenten managed at last and, as if the words had opened the sluices to allow all the emotions to rush forth, she began to talk.

* * *

Neji glared blearily at the empty glass that rested on the table in front of him. His head whirled and the world seemed one big blur of sound and color that sped up and slowed down all at once. He laid his head back against the couch, closing his eyes with a nauseated groan, and admitted silently that maybe the mix of cocaine, ecstasy and alcohol had not been the best idea he'd ever had.

Tenten hadn't been in school again that day. She hadn't been to school since the previous Thursday, in fact. Not that he was keeping track or anything. But he'd spoken to Temari that Thursday, a week ago, and that had been the last day he'd seen Tenten.

Temari had returned to school on Monday and she had looked completely unlike her usual self – she seemed unsure, scared, pale and withdrawn, and so he'd assumed that she'd spoken to Tenten. He'd frozen with dread when he'd first caught sight of Temari's expression but there had been no announcement about Tenten and gradually he'd relaxed somewhat, no longer fearing that he'd been too late.

But Tenten hadn't returned to school. And every day was a test – a test of self-restraint. Every morning he had to fight against the urge to walk up to Temari and demand to know what had happened. Every afternoon he had to fight against the temptation to stop by Tenten's house, just to see if she was alright.

He hated not knowing – that was all. Not knowing meant that he couldn't forget about it and move on since he was constantly wondering …

A frustrated grunt left his lips as he pushed himself slowly to his feet – swaying unsteadily as his vision refused to cooperate in the endeavor. Everything pitched and rolled as if he was aboard ship but Neji defiantly took a step forward – and promptly crashed into the coffee table. Muffled curses sounded as he tripped and, unable to right his balance quickly enough, fell forward to land on the floor on the other side of the table.

Neji threw an arm over his eyes and moaned quietly – barely aware of all the bruises he'd just sustained but would surely feel tomorrow – his headlong rush had done nothing but aggravate the nausea that roiled within and he decided that it was far too much trouble to try and get up and go to bed. Instead, he'd stay just where he was, and hope that, tonight, his dreams would not be haunted by tear-filled brown eyes, soft pink lips, and the silkiest skin he'd ever felt.

* * *

The weeks slowly turned into a month and then two. Gradually Tenten began to feel like herself again. She felt stronger – clearer somehow. She still kept far away from Neji, she did not even look at Sasuke, though he'd tried to speak to her a couple of times, and Ino and Sakura's hurt voice messages had nearly stopped as well. Tenten had never been so thankful for Temari as in the last weeks – her constant presence at Tenten's side was the only thing that had kept her erstwhile life from creeping back up to consume her. Tenten knew that there were many unresolved issues she had to straighten out with regard to the people she'd called friends for a few short months but she also knew that she wasn't strong enough to face them yet.

Continued visits to the psychologist's office had left her with a much better understanding of her own emotions, and how to deal with them, and Tenten had reached a point where the constant ache of sadness caused by Neji's leaving could be consigned to the background of her life. She sighed in frustration when she couldn't find her favorite hairclips, pushed the thoughts away to allow her to concentrate, and began to search through her bedside drawers for the second time.

"Are you sure this is a good idea?" Temari asked skeptically, as she watched Tenten rush around her room.

"The psychologist _you _dragged me to certainly seems to think so," Tenten snapped. Her nerves were on edge and she knew she was taking it out on Temari but decided to feel bad about it later. She glanced up from rummaging through her dresser in surprise as Temari's laugh rang through the room. The blonde had collapsed back against Tenten's pillows, clearly finding Tenten's words highly amusing. "It really wasn't funny," Tenten grumbled, returning to her search, and Temari sobered nearly at once.

"No," she agreed, "but you have no idea how good it is to hear you sounding like yourself again."

The girls shared a smile and Tenten straightened up with a rueful sigh. "I'm not going to get any more ready, am I?" she asked her friend and Temari shook her head slowly.

"You know, Ten, just because a doctor says so doesn't mean you have to do this – you should do what feels right to you."

Tenten shook her head slowly, dark hair swinging around her shoulders with the movement. "No, I agree with her," she told Temari softly, shaking her bangs out of her eyes, "I need closure. I need to move on, and to do that I need to hear Neji say it straight out. It will hurt – I know that, but I have to do this."

* * *

Neji threw his pen at the wall with enough force to crack the plastic covering the small tube of ink, and wondered why on earth he'd picked _this _assignment to do. Though he rarely did his homework himself, every now and again he'd choose to do an assignment - just to see if he could. He had every intention of going to college and it wouldn't help to get there and not have the faintest idea what the subjects were about.

He ran frustrated hands through his hair and tried to force his attention back to the pages spread out in front of him, but finally he admitted to himself that his rising level of irritation had very little to do with the difficulty of the assignment – in fact, it was ridiculously easy – and had everything to do with the fact that he was still utterly unable to get Tenten out of his head.

She'd returned to school eventually, and he'd been relieved to note that she looked better. And that should've been the end of it. He could stop worrying about her, could stop feeling guilty about her, she was clearly getting her life back on track and that was what he'd wanted. Yet the perplexing obsession had remained.

He looked for her in the halls, in the parking-lot, in the cafeteria … stared at the way the lights shone off her hair in class, and, though she studiously avoided making eye contact, he never stopped trying to get even an insincere smile of acknowledgement from her.

A soft knock at his door turned his glare in that direction instead, and he snapped, "What, Hinata?" without really realizing it – only Hinata ever visited him in his bedroom, and then usually only to deliver his completed homework or to inform him that her father wished to see him.

The knob turned slowly and the door opened hesitantly. Neji ground his teeth together – nothing irritated him more than his cousin's diffidence. He forced himself to take a deep breath, and tried to modify his tone to politeness, but all thoughts of irritation, anger and frustration fled when the door opened fully to reveal, not Hinata as he'd anticipated, but a very uncertain Tenten.

"May I come in?" she asked softly, avoiding his eyes. Neji stared at her hovering form in total astonishment, and only when she started shifting uncomfortably from one foot to the other did he realize that he'd never answered her polite question.

He stood and waved her in, walking to the door and closing it softly behind her. Neji leaned back against the door, crossing his arms and eyed Tenten warily. "What can I do for you?" he asked, as indifferently as he was capable of, noting the nervous way she twisted her hands together.

Tenten took a deep breath, met his gaze squarely, and said, "I need you to tell me that you don't want to be with me. Ever. In so many words. Please." She looked at him expectantly and Neji was seized with the insane urge to laugh.

Clearly he'd not done a good job of hiding his amusement at her request because bright color flooded her cheeks and annoyance flared in her eyes but she stubbornly ignored the rising blush and kept her gaze firmly locked with his.

Neji took a step closer, pushing off of the door in a languid movement. "You want me to tell you that I don't want to be with you ever?" he queried thoughtfully, pretending not to notice her nervous step backward as he came ever closer.

"Y-yes," Tenten cleared her throat and tried to sound certain, but she was unable to entirely hide her discomfort and Neji smirked inwardly.

The backs of her knees hit the edge of his bed, and Neji nearly laughed again at the way her eyes widened in surprise, as she wind-milled her arms trying to retain her balance. Her distraction allowed him a chance to get closer, until only an inch of space separated their bodies, and when Tenten's eyes rose warily to his again, Neji ducked his head so their lips nearly touched.

"Now why would I lie like that?" he asked huskily, his breath brushing her mouth, the visible shiver that skated down her spine wreaking havoc on his control.

"I-it's not a lie," Tenten whispered back uncertainly but Neji shook his head.

"No, it _is _a lie. I said that I wasn't good for you, not that I didn't want you – my chivalrous side does seem to surface when it comes to you. But, right or wrong, I _do _want to be with you – as much as you want to be with me. So why fight it any longer…"

Every word brought his mouth a fraction of an inch closer – their lips met, clung, and Neji gave up control for the moment. Allowed his desires to overrule thought and logic and simply enjoyed the feel of her crushed against him. Tenten stood frozen and Neji softened his kiss, moving persuasively against her mouth, tongue flicking out to lick softly at her full lower lip.

For the first time in his life uncertainty took hold as she still didn't respond, and Neji was just about to pull away – he wouldn't force her to kiss him if she really didn't want to, he did have _some _morals – but then a soft breath left her and Tenten opened her mouth beneath his and melted into his hold.

The dizzying sensation of her tongue tangling sinuously with his, and the knowledge of her surrender lent urgency to his mouth, his hands, as he tried to get the most from the moment – some part of him knowing that this couldn't possibly be real.

His hands pulled frantically at the hem of her t-shirt – the desperate desire to feel her soft skin again overruling all others for a moment, and Neji sighed into her mouth when his hands settled on the warm skin of her lower back. His hands trailed up and down, fingers stroking teasingly along her spine, enjoying the shivers and shudders that ran through her.

He pushed his body against hers, keeping up the pressure until she gave in again and fell back onto the bed, taking Neji with her …

* * *

**_A/N: So, what did you think? Let me know - please REVIEW!_**


	10. Chapter 10

_**A/N: Thank you so much to all the readers for your support! This chapter gave me quite a bit of difficulty, but I hope that you'll forgive me for it and try to enjoy it regardless ^^ This chapter sees mostly NejiTen moments (yay!) but there are a few plot hints in there if you look for them. So, I hope that you'll like it and please leave me a review! It keeps me motivated =D**_

**_Warnings: Hmm ... mostly lemon/lime in this one ... but for safety's sake: all the usual ones apply!_**

**_Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto or the characters used in this story and I make no profit from it._**

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_**Chapter 10**_

Neji's weight settled over her and Tenten felt the glow start at her toes and push up along her body until it warmed every part of her being. For the first time in months she felt … complete. His mouth moved over hers with precision, nipping and licking in exactly the right way until coherency was something Tenten couldn't even dream about. The kiss went on and on, and Tenten forgot about breathing until Neji wrenched his mouth away and she gasped for air.

For the longest time he stared at her, panting for breath, his eyes darkening. Her heart contracted as she read the unknown emotions there … wariness, want, uncertainty, maybe just a touch of fear? She didn't know, but she was helplessly caught in his gaze.

In tense silence they waited, for what neither could really say, as they regained their breath. As her breath returned so did her ability to think and Tenten waited anxiously for whatever Neji was about to say, trying to suppress the familiar frustration that she inevitably felt when with Neji. His body and his eyes said one thing while the words he spoke contradicted the subtle messages in the most hurtful way imaginable. Distantly she was aware that she was not supposed to be doing this, not supposed to be with Neji like this, she had come here for closure, not to muddy the already murky waters of their relationship – if it could even be classified as such – further. But, as always, she was unable to resist, couldn't deny herself whatever crumbs Neji felt like throwing her way – even if she knew that it would hurt twice as much when he withdrew again.

"You said you would do anything to be with me," Neji's hoarse whisper broke through the tension, and Tenten nearly flinched in instinctive reaction before registering what he'd said. Confusion spread over her features, and she licked her lips uncertainly, a little thrill travelling down her spine when his eyes followed the movement and darkened even more.

"I-I … yes, I did," she acknowledged with a little inclination of her head. Neji's eyes returned to hers, and she wished so much that she could understand what was going through his head that she nearly cried in frustration at being denied. For another long moment he stared intently into her eyes, and Tenten wanted nothing more than to look away, but found that she couldn't.

"Did you mean it?" he asked, at last, seeming almost indifferent, merely waiting for her answer in mild curiosity.

Tenten couldn't help it – her temper flared. She pushed at his shoulders, trying to get up, wanting nothing more than to leave. She hated the almost mocking undertones of his voice, hated how he only had to touch her, even once, for her to fall into his lap with no thought of resistance. And she was damned if she'd hang around only to get humiliated further.

Neji refused to give way, did not make any move to comply with her wishes and let her get up, instead he pushed back, forcing her to lie still beneath him. He smirked at her glare, and lifted one hand to brush a strand of hair away from her eyes. A slow, soft touch that made her breath catch in her throat.

"If you did mean it…" his low whisper trailed off as he lowered his head so their lips nearly touched again and Tenten could feel her entire body tensing up. She felt adrift in a sea of confusion – did Neji mean what she thought he meant? Surely not. He didn't want her, not in any kind of permanent way. He'd made that more than clear enough. Neji was still looking at her in silence and she was uncomfortably aware of her overly expressive features, she was sure he'd been able to read each and every frantic thought that had just passed through her hopelessly muddled head.

"I'm tired of fighting it. If that's what you want, then stay," Neji's whisper sounded torn from the deepest reaches of his soul as if, even as he said the words, he was still fighting against them. Tenten stared up at him, totally at a loss for anything to say. But Neji continued before she'd managed to get her thoughts in order anyway, and she decided that maybe this was a good time for her to simply keep quiet.

"Stay, if that will make you happy. But know that I'm not good for you – and you can't change who I am."

Another intent gaze, but this time Tenten knew he was reading her instinctive answer – she could feel the way he relaxed against her, the tautness of his muscles loosening to his usual fluid grace. And at last, Tenten understood some of what she'd read in his gaze – he'd been uncertain of how he would be received. The idea was so strange … that Neji would be afraid of rejection, that Tenten nearly wanted to laugh, and would have, if she hadn't felt much more like crying. Although she had no idea who she would be crying for: him or herself. Because deep down Tenten acknowledged that Neji was right: if she'd had any shred of self-preservation she would be getting up, leaving, and not looking back. Tenten opened her mouth, discovered that she had no control over her voice and settled for pulling his head down to hers in assent.

Just before their lips could touch Neji pulled back a little. Seriousness was imprinted on his usually impassive features and he stared at her as if willing her to say no. Defeat flashed through his eyes as Tenten tugged him impatiently forward and, finally, he gave in.

"I don't want to hurt you," he whispered against her mouth, "but so be it."

His mouth crashed down onto hers with barely suppressed violence. Tenten arched her back, trying to get as close as possible, her hands tangling in his hair, her legs wrapped around his hips, clinging to him as tightly as she could. Her last coherent thought for a long time was that maybe she was clinging so tightly because she could not really believe that this was real. He might be bad for her, might hurt her, but the pain of being without Neji was far worse.

* * *

Neji played with the ends of Tenten's hair absentmindedly as he watched her sleep. Her head rested on his chest, one hand next to her cheek, her legs still twined around his. As if, even in sleep, she couldn't bear to let go. He dropped the strands of silky chocolate hair to run his hand through his own, trying to tamp down on the flare of satisfaction the thought gave him. Self-loathing filled him as he fought against himself for the millionth time: if he truly cared about her at all then he would not be feeling satisfied by the mere thought that she didn't want to let go of him. No, that wasn't quite true: he _did _care about her – no use in denying that anymore – but still … if he had been a less selfish person then he would've sent her away. Would have stood strong against the temptation she presented and would have put her well-being before his own wants and needs.

Sadly, Neji knew that he was definitely _not _a selfless being. He'd spent far too long indulging his every whim – it was unreasonable to expect to suddenly develop the ability to deny himself – especially when it concerned Tenten. Sub-consciously he'd already admitted weeks ago that he'd never wanted anything as much as he wanted her. Not just her body, no matter how mind-blowing the sex was, no, he wanted her on a level he'd never even been aware of before.

He liked the way she made him feel: as if he meant something, as if he could accomplish anything. He liked the way she brought out the remnants of his old-self, the parts he'd thought long-lost. She made him believe that there might still be some good left in the world. She made him believe in himself. Made him _want _to change – made him want to become a better man. For her. Because she was good, and kind, and pure. She was light, and life, and he craved the purifying presence of her more than he'd ever craved any drug.

He hated it.

Hated it because he knew, inevitably, he would let her down. No matter how he tried he knew that he would hurt her. Eventually she would wake up and see him for what he really was. She would finally acknowledge the dissolute character he'd cultivated so carefully, and then she would leave. And, most of all, he hated how much it hurt to think of her leaving.

But, for now, she was here, in his arms, and the future was still far off. There was time enough to worry about what was still to come, for now, for once, he could allow himself to simply enjoy something that brought him some contentment. There was so much about him that she didn't know … things that would open her eyes to what he was really like … he knew that he could not put off telling her forever … but, selfishly, he'd already decided to delay that day as long as possible. Anything to keep her with him for just a little longer. Neji stared at her peaceful face, the slight rise and fall of her chest as she breathed, reveled in the brush of her breath against his skin, and closed his eyes, trying desperately to push away the dark thoughts.

_It's unreasonable, so I won't ask it of you, but I don't want you to hate me when all is said and done._

* * *

Tenten woke to the slow but deliberate brush of hands across her skin. For a moment she felt disoriented but then she remembered … and she could not keep the smile from lighting up her face, even as she kept her eyes tightly closed. Just in case it really had been a dream. Light touches butterflied across her abdomen, over her hips, down to her knees, and she let the laughter escape when Neji's hands tickled softly across her ribs.

"Stop … that tickles," she laughed, squirming away from his hands but she'd no sooner turned her back to him, and buried her face in his pillow, before Neji's arms clamped vice-like around her and drew her back against his chest.

"You like it," he breathed as he pressed lingering kisses down her neck, and Tenten shivered, arching her neck to allow him better access. She let him continue for a while, but the urge to touch him, to have _him_ shuddering in pleasure beneath _her_ touch, was overwhelming, and Tenten turned abruptly in his hold so that she faced him again.

"I like this more," she whispered, tugging his bottom lip between her teeth and sucking lightly. Neji growled, low in his throat, his hands tightening on her hips and Tenten smiled as she deepened the kiss, getting lost in the taste of him on her tongue.

When she drew back for breath she quickly took control - before he turned her into a helpless puddle again - and allowed her hand to drift down the sculpted muscles of his stomach. She kept her eyes locked with his as her hand trailed steadily down, tracing patterns over his hips, enjoying the way Neji seemed to be holding his breath. She was teasing, she knew, but more importantly, she was giving him a chance to draw away, to take back control. One thing she'd learned about Neji was that he hated being out of control, and surprise made her heart flutter when he surrendered with a groan and closed his eyes when her hand closed around his aroused flesh.

Such an insignificant action, and yet Tenten knew the magnitude of surrender for Neji. Allowing her to do this, to take control, meant that he trusted her and she blinked away the stupid tears, trying to forget emotionality and focus on the moment.

Her hand tightened and Neji's breath caught again, the tension holding him perfectly still. Tenten leaned forward, trailing kisses down his neck, marking him as he'd marked her. In an unbroken movement, Tenten shifted onto her knees, pressing hot kisses against his chest, hand moving slowly in an unhurried rhythm.

Reaching her goal, Tenten didn't hesitate, she took him into her mouth, sucking deep, and shuddered when Neji's hands flew to her head, his fingers buried in her hair. A low moan shuddered through his body, his hips jerked reflexively and Tenten trailed her hands up and down his sides, hoping to make him emit more of those sounds.

She set a slow, steady rhythm, reveling in the way she made Neji shudder and the way he jerked his hips encouragingly, the way his hands tightened in her hair as he silently begged her to increase the pace. Stubbornly she ignored him, kept doing exactly what she'd been doing and paid the price for her stubbornness. Neji opened his eyes to glare reproachfully down at her, his hand snaking down her body to repay the favor.

Tenten moaned with the first thrust of his fingers, and stared in fascination at the way Neji threw his head back against the pillows as her voice vibrated around him. His eyes blazed into hers when he raised his head again, and suddenly it appeared that he'd had enough of her torture. One smooth motion landed Tenten on her back beneath him, and Neji couldn't hold back any longer. His hips thrust of their own accord and he pressed his forehead against her shoulder, her name leaving his lips in a breathless sound, as he pushed as deeply into her as he could go, wishing that he could disappear into her.

It was their first time all over again, Tenten realized in dazed pleasure. The touch of Neji's hands were reverent, his movements slow - meaningful somehow. And this time she was unfettered by fears and nervousness … this time she understood the language of his body; she heard the silent words, felt the emotion as Neji thrust into her over and over. She heard and understood, even as the words went unacknowledged in the rush of pleasure that claimed them both.

* * *

The Uchiha driveway seemed longer than Tenten remembered it being. After a day spent in such perfect bliss the last thing she wanted was to test her new-found self-control in the confines of the mansion. Weeks of therapy had started her on the slow road to recovery and deep down Tenten knew that she was _not_ ready to brave the hazards of her old life again. Not even with Neji.

But that was part of the problem. Neji knew nothing about her breakdown, knew nothing about the last few weeks of her life. She hadn't wanted to test their fragile, new relationship by refusing to go with him when he'd informed her lazily that he needed to stop by the mansion for a few minutes later that night.

So, now she found herself nervously trailing in Neji's wake through the familiar hallway down to the basement. Tenten took a deep breath and firmly told herself to focus on anything but her surroundings. _I can do this. I can do this_. She repeated the mantra and resisted the urge to cling to Neji's hand like a frightened child. To be honest, she had no idea if hand-holding was allowed – in fact, she had no real idea of what this _was_. Were they a couple now? Did Neji want her to act all girlfriend-like? Tenten grimaced. Somehow she sincerely doubted that Neji would want her to act girlfriend-like even if they _were_ in an official relationship now.

She was so caught up in her thoughts she barely noticed the sensation her arrival caused. It was only when Ino and Sakura threw themselves at her with loud squeals that she came back to the present with a little start. She laughed apprehensively and tried to disentangle herself from the two girls but they refused to let go and bombarded her with questions.

"Where have you been?"

"We missed you!"

"Thanks for returning our calls, by the way."

The last came from Ino, a little sourly now that she'd gotten over the initial excitement, and Tenten winced.

"I'm sorry, guys. I just had a lot on my plate the last few weeks," she said at last, aware of how lame the excuse sounded but at a loss for anything else to say. She looked over her shoulder, Ino and Sakura had drawn her a little away from Neji and suddenly she needed to make sure that he was there. Her eyes met Neji's and she was unaware of the pleading and badly hidden fear and desperation that shone in her clear gaze but Neji noticed and a slight frown drew his brows together.

He unceremoniously pushed between her and the others, drawing her away. He pressed a soft kiss against her lips – quick and devoid of any passion – but Tenten could feel the sense of security stealing over her and she smiled tremulously up at him.

"Go. I'm fine."

With another quick kiss she pushed past him to rejoin Ino and Sakura, praying that Neji would be quick with whatever he'd needed to do here tonight – she couldn't help but hope that he'd needed to come here to deal rather than to use.

* * *

Half-an-hour later found Tenten leaning wearily against the wall by the bar, half-hidden in shadow. Thankfully Ino and Sakura had left to dance and she tried to make herself as inconspicuous as possible, hoping against hope that everyone would just leave her alone.

Another shadow fell over her and Tenten's gaze rose to collide with Sasuke's dark one. He leaned casually against the bar, motioning for a drink. He raised his eyebrows when Tenten declined his silent offer with a shake of her head but said nothing, merely took his drink and turned to face her.

Tenten burned with the need to get away, but she knew better than to show Sasuke any weakness that he might exploit. She was still contemplating ways to get away without seeming as if she was _trying_ to get away when Sasuke spoke, making her jump.

"So, you and Hyuuga."

His words were a statement that Tenten didn't have an answer for anyway so she simply looked at him.

"You know," Sasuke said musingly, taking a drink from the glass in his hand, "I seem to recall a plan to make Hyuuga beg. Instead, I find you following him around like a lost puppy."

With a sinking feeling in her stomach Tenten began to see where Sasuke was heading, but she remained silent, hoping that he'd let it go if he got no reaction from her.

"Now, I really don't care if you're with him or not … but I invested quite a bit of time and money in your hare-brained schemes. You promised to deliver something I was quite looking forward to – Hyuuga on his knees, that is – and failed to deliver. And, at this point, I doubt that you ever _will _deliver. So, the question becomes: how will you repay me?"

Sasuke pushed away from the bar and walked away without a backward glance, having got his point across. Tenten clenched her hands around the edge of the counter-top and prayed for the world to right itself before someone noticed that something was wrong with her. She'd been hoping, stupidly perhaps, but nonetheless, she'd been hoping, that Sasuke wouldn't call in the favors she owed him. How on earth was she going to explain this to Neji? There was no telling what the Uchiha would expect from her.

Fear rose – she couldn't lose Neji, not again, not after having just found him. During her depression she hadn't cared much what happened to her one way or the other, but now …

Now she had something to lose.

* * *

**_A/N: So, what did you think? *peeks at readers from between her fingers* I fully realize that the last two chapters were kinda sucky and I'm not really sure about this one either, so feel free to tell me how bad it was ^^ Still, I'd love to hear what you thought, good or bad, and I'm really interested to see what you made of the plot hints in the chapter =D Let me know - REVIEW!!!!_**


	11. Chapter 11

_**A/N: An update! o_O ... wow, I'm amazed too XD Seriously, I'm soooo sorry for the long delay! I've kinda got a lot on my plate at the moment - charity events, moving house, etc etc - but I am doing my best to try and get chapters out as quick as I can. That being said, I had very little inspiration for this chapter, I must admit. It's sort of a continuation of the ascent to the climax (same as the last chapter) and it was insanely difficult to write without giving too much away - don't want to spoil the story for you before the end =D Still, I hope that you enjoy the chapter despite the lack of action - more NejiTen in this one ^^ **_

**_Warnings: all the usual ones apply_**

**_Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto_**

* * *

_**Chapter 11**_

Neji watched Tenten surreptiously from the corner of his eye as he pulled out of the Uchiha's driveway. She was lost in thought, a frown drawing lines on her forehead as she worried her lower lip between her teeth from time to time. Neji frowned as he turned out of the drive and sped up – his attention now focused on the road in front of him.

She'd been acting strange since he'd mentioned going to the mansion earlier that evening. The happy glow she'd been surrounded with had seemed to dim, some of the light leaving her eyes, and unknown emotions flickering across her features. Then, when they'd arrived, she'd seemed almost … afraid. But why would she be afraid? Of what? Neji's frown darkened, maybe the question should be of _whom_? He could think of no one she would be afraid of except Uchiha and the thought of what the raven-haired boy could have done to instill such fear in the usually brave Tenten was enough to make his fists clench around the steering-wheel in a white-knuckled grip.

Maybe the Uchiha had something to do with her injuries a few months back? Neji wasn't stupid, he'd noticed how, even now, Tenten wore row upon row of tight, black rubber bangles – clearly she was trying to hide something. He absently decided to try and remove them the next time she was distracted, but his thoughts were still focused on the way she'd reacted when Ino and Sakura had descended upon her. He'd thought she'd be happy to see her friends, instead her eyes had clung to him, a vaguely panicked light in their depths, pleading with him not to leave her.

Much to his annoyance he'd found that he hadn't _wanted _to leave her – but it hadn't only been due to the puppy eyes she'd turned on him. No, he'd been wrestling with his darker side ever since he'd set foot on the Uchiha grounds – fighting the desire to show the world whom she belonged to. He'd been secretly elated when the opportunity had presented itself: he knew very well that the swift kiss he'd bestowed on her hadn't gone unnoticed. By now everyone would know that she was his. Satisfaction tinged his thoughts, whatever Sasuke had done to her in the past, he would know now that he had to keep his distance.

He glanced at Tenten again, noting the way she plucked agitatedly at the bangles that adorned her wrist and the satisfaction was swiftly replaced with a wary unease. What if her new behavior had nothing to do with Uchiha and everything to do with him? What if someone had said something to her …

Neji suppressed the groan that wanted to escape. He had no desire to dredge up the past … the way Tenten looked at him … as if he was the beginning and the end of everything to her … he didn't want that look to disappear. Not ever.

Surprise gripped him at that last thought – surprise tinged with more than a little unease. How was it possible to become so dependent on another's opinion, and in such a short space of time? His mouth compressed into a thin line, and Neji unconsciously sped up, his foot heavy on the gas-pedal, not noting Tenten's gasp when the needle of the speedometer passed 100.

* * *

Tenten gasped when Neji sped up – a dangerous speed considering the hairpin turns that led to the Uchiha mansion on its outcropping of rock. She glanced up at Neji with a light frown when he made no move to slack off and the frown deepened when she noticed the scowl imprinted on his features. She'd been so relieved when he'd finally appeared after an hour – stone-cold sober and with clear eyes, that she'd nearly thrown herself at him before sanity had restrained her. Uncharacteristic behavior, or any more uncharacteristic behavior at any rate, would only alert Neji to the fact that something was amiss – he wasn't stupid.

She bit her lip and laid a gentle hand on his arm. He glanced at her in surprise, as if he'd forgotten that she was there, and thankfully he slowed down when his eyes lighted on the speedometer. Tenten subsided into her seat with a slight sigh of relief and returned her attention to the moon-lit streets flashing by.

Absently she wondered how late it was – if she would get into trouble again - but found that worries such as what her mother might say faded into insignificance beside the threat of Sasuke that still hung over her like a dark cloud. She jerked back to the present when Neji laid a hand on her knee and, much to her surprise, found that they were parked outside her house. She sent a guilty smile at Neji that quickly slid off her lips at the intent look he leveled her with.

"We haven't really talked," Neji said, his tone abrupt.

Tenten shook her head in confusion – what did he want to talk about? She sent him another hesitant look, since when did Neji want to _talk_ to her anyway?

"But, after last time, I'm fairly sure your parents aren't as lenient anymore – and it's already nearly ten. I'll come by later. If you want." Though his words were never anything but a statement of a fact Tenten couldn't help the glow that spread through her at his last words. Neji sounded hesitant – as if he wasn't sure that was what she wanted, and the mere fact that Neji cared enough to give her a choice in the matter made Tenten's blood sing.

"Of course," she agreed softly, and when Neji nodded slightly and turned away she took that as her cue to go. Tenten had just opened the door when Neji leaned over the passenger seat and grabbed her wrist, pulling her back so that she fell into his arms.

"Wait up for me," he whispered huskily, pressing a hard kiss to her temple before giving her a light push. Tenten ran quickly up the path to the front door, wincing at the noise the gravel made as it crunced beneath her feet, wondering how on earth it was possible to be so happy that it felt as if she was flying. It made no sense, she had every reason to fear Sasuke and his threats, but somehow being with Neji never failed to make her feel safe, as if every bad thing would just fade away if she ignored it long enough. Tenten's mouth twisted into a mirthless grin as she unlocked the front door and let herself into the silent house – if that wasn't a testament to the unbalanced nature of her psyche then she didn't know what was.

* * *

It was late. Nearly midnight, and Tenten anxiously paced the floor-space from her wardrobe doors to her bed. The last few hours had been agonizing. At first, still flying with the idea that Neji wanted her, she'd been too excited to settle to anything. Then reality had set in.

Sasuke had her caught between the devil and the deep blue sea and there was no way out. Short of telling Neji the whole story, of course, and Tenten instinctively realized that if she laid all her cards on the table – told Neji the whole truth – he wouldn't trust her again. Things between them were still too unsettled – too new. Everything inside her seemed to die when she thought of losing that fragile, new trust that Neji had only just begun to exhibit. No, she could not reasonably expect him to understand that her actions, her half-assed plans, had all been fueled by love.

The thought had abruptly turned into wondering what on earth Neji wanted to talk about and that had set the butterflies fluttering. To try and stop the nerves from making her sick she'd taken a long, hot bath. Had spoken to Temari for nearly an hour while soaking, reassuring her friend that all had gone well. She hated lying to Temari after everything but knew that Temari would go through the roof if she had an inkling of what had actually transpired. No, it was far better for Temari to stay in the dark – at least until Tenten had something concrete to tell her.

At last, she'd run out of things to do and for the last hour she'd been pacing, worrying, dreaming. Her cell phone vibrated and Tenten jumped, so caught up in her musing that she needed a moment to calm her heart before she gathered her scattered thoughts enough to move toward the bed where the small phone lay.

The screen was lit up, shining like a beacon in the dim lighting of her bedroom, Neji's name startling in its bold font, and Tenten's heartbeat sped up again as she stole silently down the stairs and through the dark house to the front door. Her stepfather was away again and, by virtue of Tenten's plying her mother with one glass of wine after another, her parent had retired hours ago and would hopefully stay asleep until it was safely morning.

She opened the front door slightly, and peered out hesitantly, gasping in surprise when Neji suddenly appeared in front of her as he stepped out of the deep shadows of the overhanging porch. She reached out and grabbed his hand, pulling him inside after her, and after locking the door, she pulled him after her through the dark house to her bedroom.

They reached the landing that led to her door without incident and Tenten breathed a silent sigh of relief when she finally closed her bedroom door behind her. Neji stood in the middle of her room arching an ironic eyebrow at her. Tenten shrugged defensively, he had no idea how strictly her life was ordered these days and she had no desire to enlighten him. If he thought her sudden fear of getting caught ridiculous then he was welcome to those thoughts.

She pushed away from the door and went to her bed, leaned back against the headboard and drew her legs up to her chest.

"You can talk normally – my mom's asleep and her room is on the opposite side of the house," she informed him. Neji shrugged and moved to join her, stretching himself out next to her, flat on his back. Tenten shifted over uncomfortably to give him more room, and she could feel the blush pushing up through her body at his knowing smirk.

"You wanted to talk," she reminded him sharply and abruptly all playfulness drained from his face. Neji sat up, pushed his hair out of his face and fixed her with another of his searching looks – the kind that made her feel as if he could read every secret imprinted on her heart. Tenten swallowed nervously.

Neji opened his mouth, closed it with a snap, his lips compressing into a narrow line and glared at her curtains. "I want to know what you're hiding from me – why you were so scared when we were at the mansion earlier."

Tenten jerked in shock. The very questions she had no answers for. She swallowed again, and frantically tried to think of something, anything, to tell him. Neji turned his gaze back to her and was watching her intently again, much to her dismay. The silence dragged on and Tenten could almost feel Neji withdrawing from her and suddenly she decided that surely parts of the truth could be revealed …

"I've been in therapy," she blurted out, staring at her hands, "to try and get out of that world – and to stop using drugs. Tonight was … difficult for me."

The mattress jerked as Neji stood but Tenten was too afraid of the condemnation she was sure she'd find in his eyes to look at him again. She began to pluck at the bangles she still wore – a nervous gesture she'd picked up – and studiously stared at her toenails. They were painted a deep purple that Tenten abruptly decided she hated with all her heart.

His hands were warm when he took her agitated fingers into a firm grasp, stilling her plucking. Tenten took a deep breath and lifted her chin defiantly, deciding to brave whatever he threw at her but she was completely wrong-footed by the strange light that shone in Neji's eyes: not quite caring, not quite concern.

"Why didn't you tell me?" he asked quietly.

"It's not exactly the kind of thing you walk around blurting out to everyone, you know," Tenten laughed but the sound was brittle reflecting the mental stress the conversation was placing on her, "and, as you rightly noted earlier, we didn't do much talking."

Neji inclined his head and let go of her hands. He stepped back and looked at her consideringly, "In future don't martyr yourself for my sake," was all he said as he retreated to the other side of the room and stared out of the window.

Tenten watched him warily, inwardly breathing a sigh of relief that Neji wasn't pushing for more of the story – but of course he wouldn't. Tenten smiled wryly to herself, emotion made Neji uncomfortable, the mere thought of discussing feelings and reactions with a stranger was probably so alien to him that he had no idea of what to say to her confession.

Hesitantly she crossed the floor – intent on nothing but wiping the frown from his face. Heaven knew how long they would have together and she didn't intend on wasting a second of that time if she could help it. Tenten slowly raised her arms, and wrapped them around Neji's waist from behind, resting her cheek against his back as she pressed closely against him, her entire body tensed for the rejection she was sure would follow.

Neji stiffened but didn't push her away, and gradually Tenten began to relax. After a long moment, Neji turned around, catching her arms when she made to drop them and wrapping them around him again. He rested his chin on top of her head and after another long, comfortable moment of shared warmth he drew back a little and drew her over to the bed.

Disappointment painted her face – was the evening coming to an end so soon – but quickly turned to surprise when Neji pulled his shirt over his head, stripping down to his boxers, and got in, raising an eyebrow expressively up at Tenten when she hovered uncertainly next to the bed.

She gave up on understanding his enigmatic behavior and with a slight shrug stepped out of her sweatpants, pulling the oversized t-shirt she'd been wearing over her head. The blush that spread over her was entirely ridiculous Tenten firmly told herself as Neji's eyes roamed over her body, now only clad in a pair of sleeping shorts and a tank top. She quickly got in beside him and snapped the bedside light off – thankful for the descent of darkness.

The moonlight shone brightly into the room allowing enough light for her to make out the outlines of his features and for a long moment Tenten simply stared at Neji as he lay on his back, his arms crossed behind his head. Finally she gave up on guessing what was going through his mind and snuggled down into the pillows. Sleep stole silently over her senses and the last thing she was aware of was Neji shifting, turning onto his side, and pulling her against his chest.

* * *

Her breathing was deep, even, her heartbeat steady, but Neji stared at Tenten for another few minutes – just to be sure she was deeply asleep. He gently lifted his arm from where it draped across her waist and waited again. She still didn't stir. Slowly, silently, he slipped from the bed and ghosted across the room to her dresser. Picking up the pair of scissors he'd spied there earlier he made his way back to the bed.

Tenten slept with one hand curled next to her cheek, the other, the one covered in bangles, lying next to her on the mattress. Neji slowly reached forward, keeping his eyes on her face to make sure that she was still asleep and slid the bottom blade beneath the row of black rubber covering her arm, being careful to not let the cold blade touch her warm skin.

The scissors glinted silver in the moonlight, flashing from between the spaces the bangles made, and Neji paused. This was invasion of privacy. And he was fairly sure that he was supposed to wait until Tenten felt comfortable enough with him to tell him what had been going on but … he'd been wondering, waiting, watching for too long already.

One decisive snip divided the circles covering her wrist in half and Neji held his breath, thanking his lucky stars that the scissors had been sharp and that Tenten had remained oblivious. He carefully eased the scissors away and placed them on the bedside table before reaching for her wrist and gently lifting her arm so he could remove the ruined bangles.

Tenten snuffled and Neji froze. A slight frown created grooved shadows on her forehead but then she sighed and her expression cleared. Neji breathed again. Tenten had turned slightly – she was more on her back than on her side now and Neji could easily make out the darker shadows that marred her wrist. A scowl drew his brows together.

_Suicide?_

Abruptly he no longer cared if Tenten woke up and he quickly flipped her wrist over. Tenten moaned slightly but slept on peacefully and Neji leaned forward, shifting his body slightly so the silvery light of the moon shone onto her skin over his shoulder. His stomach turned, his head throbbed and his mind reeled. Bile burned like acid and his legs nearly gave way under him as he managed to decipher the story the shadows told.

The scratches were healed – but the skin was still raised, puffy, and Neji knew that in daylight the skin would be red – the lines marring her wrist easily noticeable. Suddenly her choice of arm accessories made sense. Neji swallowed and took a deep if silent breath. The concentric patterns the scratches formed were not what held him frozen in place. His hand shifted slightly around her wrist as he moved his thumb – slipping caressingly over her soft skin – and Neji carefully traced the three big lines in the middle where Tenten had carved him into her skin. He quickly took his hand away – as if Tenten had burned him – and fought against the rising nausea. One step back, then two … Neji found himself at her window, staring silently out at nothing. Images danced and flashed in his head, guilt pounded through his veins and, for the first time, cold fear brushed down his spine.

He'd been thinking that he'd brought her an every day kind of darkness. Nothing unusual, certainly nothing that was insurmountable as long as one had the strength of mind necessary to overcome temptation. He'd been wrong.

Her darkness far surpassed his own.

* * *

**A/N: So, how was it? Terrible? Worth continuing? Meh, I'm not too happy with the way it came out, so con-crit will be greatly appreciated. I'm totally stumped as to what will make it better! We're getting somewhere plot-wise now though, so hopefully the development chapters are now a thing of the past ^^ Please please please drop me a review and let me know what you thought!**


	12. Chapter 12

_**A/N: Inspiration hit and I decided to sacrifice some sleep so I could get this posted tonight ^^ I hope you'll enjoy it, stuff has started happening again (meh, I'm sooo happy that the development chapters are over!) and, though, I feel that this chapter can be improved upon I think I'm starting to get back into the characters' heads again. Let me know what you think!**_

**_Warnings: Usual ones ... blah blah_**

**_Disclaimer: Kishi-sama owns Naruto - not me *sighs*_**

* * *

_**Chapter 12**_

The inky blackness of deep night was slowly, inevitably, giving way to the softer darkness that precedes dawn. Neji reclined quietly against Tenten's headboard, her injured arm cradled in his hands. He leaned his head back, absentmindedly turning her hand over so it rested on his stomach, and closed his eyes. Involuntarily he found himself hoping against hope that when he opened his eyes again it would all have been a dream. But, as always, logic ruled his world and he was quite aware that it was _not_ just a bad dream. He sighed and opened his eyes slowly to stare down at the girl curled up peacefully against him.

_I won't let anything bad happen to you ever again, _he vowed silently, reaching over to brush a strand of dark hair out of her eyes. She almost smiled and snuggled closer, a silent breath puffing against his shoulder. The instinctive reaction to the shock, the involuntary withdrawal, the casting of blame, it had all receded and, as the night wore on and Neji remained lost deep in thought, holding Tenten all the while, he'd come to the conclusion that running away from unpleasantness was not going to benefit anyone. Least of all Tenten.

Once before, he'd been forced to sit by idly while someone he cared about suffered. No, that wasn't true – he'd been too selfishly caught up in his own doings to even notice. And by the time he'd realized that something was wrong, it had been too little, too late. That had been the start of his travels down the path of self-destruction. But then there was Tenten. A light at the end of the tunnel – no matter that he hadn't been looking for one. However little he deserved redemption she had taken over his thoughts, turned his life upside down and made him believe that maybe, just maybe, he might have a chance after all.

Neji shook his head to rid it of the past and leaned down to brush his mouth slowly over her dark hair. _I can't do anything about the past – couldn't save _her_. But I can save you._

A determined light began to glow in his eyes as he contemplated ways to handle the situation once Tenten woke up. Tenten was going to get her life back on track, whether she wanted to or not – and he couldn't suppress the faint sparks of gratitude that she seemed to want him by her side because he had no intention of allowing her to slip any further into the darkness he'd brought to her life.

* * *

Tenten sighed blissfully. It was still dark, as far as she could tell, and she was already regretting the retreat of the dream she'd been having but her body seemed determined to wake up. She let go of dream-Neji reluctantly, only to realize that the arms around her, the firm skin beneath her cheek, the legs tangling with hers … it all felt much too real to still be part of the dream. Abruptly she was awake but she opened her eyes slowly in the hope that, if she was still asleep, she wouldn't really wake up.

Her eyes began to focus and she raised her head a little, meeting Neji's impassive gaze with a start. Tenten shook her head to get rid of the disorientation, glanced down at his chest to get her bearings, and placed a hand on the firm muscles so she could push herself into a sitting position. Then she froze. Her still sleep-fuddled mind struggled to grasp what was wrong with the picture she was seeing and for a long time Tenten simply stared at her uncovered wrist barely aware of Neji's unmoving posture. Sudden energy had her scrambling away from him as fast as she could, wrist pressed protectively against her stomach. She swallowed nearly audibly, and finally raised her eyes to Neji's, but emotion won and the words burst from somewhere inside her in her panic.

"How dare you?" she hissed, staring accusingly at him. "Who gave you the _right_ … you have no idea even of what …"

She fought him when he sat up and reached out to her, slapping his hands away. "No," she panted from the effort of trying to evade him, "don't … don't touch me." She nearly fell out of the bed but gained her footing in time and quickly stood, wrapping her arms around herself as she retreated from him. But, newfound resolutions firmly in mind, Neji had no intention of allowing her to draw away and he followed quickly, hands held out in a gesture of surrender as he warily approached the now shivering Tenten as if she was a wild deer and would be startled into flight by the slightest movement.

"It's okay," he said softly, advancing as Tenten retreated until her back was against the wall and she had nowhere left to go. She glanced around and some of the wild light left her eyes as she realized she was trapped and Neji took advantage of her momentary distraction: he moved forward quickly and pulled her into his arms.

Tenten trembled uncontrollably against his chest, her breath coming in ragged pants, but she didn't fight back, simply sagged against him and Neji could feel the silent tears wetting his chest as she struggled to gain control of herself. For a long moment they stood, locked in place by emotions neither one really understood, then Neji drew back and cupped her cheeks, his thumbs brushing away the silvery tear-tracks that marred her cheeks.

"It's okay," he told her again, earnestly, and watched her eyes intently as wary hope began to bloom in the tear-darkened depths. "It'll be okay," he murmured into her hair as he drew her against him and led her back to the bed.

She stayed silent, watching him with big eyes as he drew her back down to lie against his chest, stroked soothingly along her back, and soon the calm strokes of his hands and the warmth of his body lulled her back to uneasy sleep.

* * *

It couldn't have been more than an hour later when Tenten woke again, still firmly wrapped in Neji's warmth but when she opened her eyes she was surprised to see that he was still awake. She quickly averted her eyes in shame when her gaze met his intent one, but Neji grasped her chin between thumb and forefinger and slowly drew her toward him until their lips where just brushing.

"Don't hide from me, ever. You don't need to," Neji whispered against her mouth but then his tongue hesitantly swept across the seam of her lips and Tenten forgot about marred skin, and shame, and simply allowed herself to drown in the touch of his lips and his hands.

He proceeded slowly, gently, lavishing attention on every part of her skin, and Tenten flinched involuntarily when he kissed her scarred wrist softly but Neji pretended not to notice and she relaxed again when he moved over to her stomach.

A strange sense of significance – a finality, an inevitability – seemed to hang over their heads as Neji inexorably kissed and touched his way down her body, his pace never slowing, but not speeding up either, and it was only when their bodies finally joined, melded into one, that the banked embers flared into a flash of fire that consumed Tenten totally.

Afterward, as she cradled Neji's head against her breast and he struggled for breath, Tenten finally gave up her vigil over her heart, stood aside and let him in again, admitting to herself that she loved him beyond death and always would. She closed her eyes and let her breathing slow down, hoping and praying that his acceptance of her – scars and all – was a good sign for the future.

* * *

Tenten closed her locker with an almost dreamy expression on her face and, when she turned, she was jolted out of pleasant day-dreams of waking up with Neji every morning as her gaze met Temari's stern one.

"Okay," the blonde took a deep breath, "I've tried to be patient – to give you space to get yourself together but what the hell happened the last two days? You're totally out of it."

Tenten shrugged as she began to walk toward her next class, books hugged firmly to her chest. Temari trailed after her, still shooting suspicious glances at her friend every couple of strides but Tenten forgot to notice when the path she took led her directly past Neji's locker - where he, conveniently, leaned lazily back against the drab metal, talking Naruto, Sai and a few others.

A shiver passed down her spine as their eyes met briefly, the faint spark of heat she read in his pearlescent gaze warming her to her toes. She wished she could go over there, just to stand next to him, maybe brush against him fleetingly as he shifted his weight from one foot to another. She turned her gaze quickly back to the tiles beneath her feet before she gave anything away. For now, she had to keep a tight rein on the secret desires. Temari knew nothing after all – no one did – and, for now, Tenten knew it had to stay that way.

She reached the door of the classroom and gave Temari a quick wave goodbye, ducking inside before Temari could begin to badger her again. She was ridiculously early but rather a few more minutes spent in a pleasant dream than Temari's incessant questions. She made her way to her seat and dropped down, shifting until she was comfortable, already so lost in her thoughts that she didn't notice the door opening to admit another early person.

It was only when Sasuke stood directly in front of his desk and snapped his fingers in front of her eyes that she came back down to earth with a start. She couldn't help the way she jumped, the wary light that entered her eyes, but she stared up at the Uchiha unwaveringly – refusing to let him frighten her with his threats.

Sasuke smirked when he had her attention and grabbed the chair in front of her desk, turning it around so he could rest his arms on the back as he stared intently at her, gauging her reaction.

"So," he announced at last, "you still owe me. I figured you could get the first installment out of the way today, it being Friday and all."

Tenten stiffened but refused to respond staring blankly ahead at Sasuke even while her thoughts whirled in a chaotic mess. Sasuke smirked again before he continued.

"The usual place. Tonight. Nine. Don't be late," he added warningly as he stood to go, swinging his leg gracefully over the chair.

* * *

As Tenten stalked into the club at precisely nine o'clock she reflected bitterly that months of absence hadn't changed a single thing. Except for her – she had changed vastly. No matter that she'd never really enjoyed the club-scene there was no longer even the incentive of maybe seeing Neji to entice her to the place.

She pushed angrily through the crowd, berating herself for falling into Sasuke's traps so neatly. She'd briefly toyed with the idea of telling Neji herself but the same old argument kept her from that course of action: the trust between them was still too fragile, Neji was still too wary for her to risk it. No, if only Sasuke had waited a few months – or years – to demand his due then it might have been a whole other story but, as things stood, she really had very little choice if she wanted her relationship with Neji to be anything more than a fleeting phenomenon.

The lights flashed and whirled around her, briefly illuminating pockets of semi-darkness so it was possible to make out the vacuous expressions of the dancers as they wound around each other. Tenten winced - she didn't want to be reminded of her brief stint as one of the empty-headed masses. She pushed the memories away, firmly fixed Neji in her mind's eye, and began to fight her way over to the stairs that led to the VIP room. It was a lot harder going than it had ever been in the past and she had only covered about a quarter of the distance when she felt a heavy hand on her shoulder.

Tenten glanced over her shoulder, frowning, ready to tell the guy to get lost but bit back her words when she recognized Sasuke's obsidian gaze. Annoyingly the dancers had drawn back to make room for Sasuke to pass, and she gritted her teeth as she allowed Sasuke to grab her hand and pull her away. They headed to the back of the room – to the storage area that Tenten would never forget – and every step had her anger levels rising. Just who did the Uchiha think he was to manipulate her life like this for his own amusement?

They reached the door to the dimly lit hallway and Sasuke gave Tenten an unceremonious push through the door. She glanced over her shoulder, suddenly uncomfortably aware of someone staring at her but dismissed the thought almost as soon as she had it – though she wasn't as successful at suppressing the memory of the lies she'd told Neji to be able to meet Sasuke here tonight. He was under the impression that she'd promised Temari a girl's night to get the blonde off her case … Tenten shook her head vigorously as she stepped resolutely into the relative quiet of the hallway – there was no reason to be remembering that – Neji wasn't here tonight, he'd said he was going to go over to Kiba's since she was busy – it was only her guilty conscience that was making her paranoid.

* * *

Neji sighed as he swirled the amber liquid in his glass and sent another bored glance around the VIP room. Ino and Sakura were dancing up a storm on the balcony again and most of the others were lounging around the bar. For the life of him he couldn't remember what had previously appealed to him about this place.

His mouth twisted in distaste as a scantily-clad girl danced seductively around him, but he simply stared at her blankly until she turned away with a slight pout. Neji pushed away from the bar, deciding to go hide in the shadows of the balcony-dancefloor in the hopes that he would be left alone that way. He wound his way through the crowd ignoring the come-hither looks he received from both sexes and breathed a sigh of relief when he was out of the press of bodies.

He leaned his forearms on the railing, staring blindly down at the main dance-floor below, reflecting wryly that it was just his luck: the one night he'd just wanted a mellow evening with some friends they all had to decide that they felt like partying up a storm. Of course, the club held many possibilities if Tenten had been present ...

Ruefully Neji admitted to himself that maybe he was so bored because all the activities he would usually have been partaking in held no appeal whatsoever anymore. Because of Tenten. He craved her touch, her skin, her mouth, her hands … not some random stranger's. He still marveled at the change a few choice admissions to himself had wrought. He had no idea what it meant, but he felt … edgy, restless… and he couldn't wait for the night to be over so that he could slip silently into Tenten's room again.

With a small start Neji finally identified the feeling he'd been mulling over all night: he was missing Tenten. He shook his head. Much to his amazement opening himself up to trust hadn't been that bad. He'd wanted to open up to Tenten and the relief of finally having done so had been nearly overwhelming. He was just so goddamned tired of fighting against himself all the time. The worst part of it was that he didn't mind – he didn't mind feeling the loss of her because that made it all the better when he got her back. He didn't mind having feelings about her in general, because he couldn't help but trust her. And maybe that fact that she needed him had something to do with it too. Neji had never been needed before, not really, and he found that he rather liked the idea.

He pushed the thoughts away and resigned himself anew to the hours that stretched ahead. Allowing his gaze to sweep over the writhing mass below, he idly amused himself by watching the drunken frenzy as people threw themselves around to the beat of the music. He caught sight of Sasuke making his way through the crowd, a bubble of space surrounding the Uchiha as people gave way, and smirked mirthlessly. With mild interest he followed Sasuke's progress wondering what lay at the end of the trek … most probably a girl …

Neji tensed with disbelief when Sasuke stopped and reached out a hand to a girl wearing a black dress. A very familiar girl wearing a black dress. Neji shook his head quickly, sure he must be imagining things – Tenten was with Temari after all …

The wide, white light that periodically scanned the room made another round and fell full on the girl's face and Neji cursed under his breath as he clearly saw Tenten outlined against the shadows below. He watched stoically as Sasuke grabbed her hand and began to guide her through the crowd to the back of the room. He watched impassively as Sasuke paused to let Tenten go through the door first. He made no move, no protest, barely even allowed himself to think or breathe, as Tenten stopped in the doorway, Sasuke's hand resting on the small of her back and glanced around furtively before she quickly stepped through, tossing her head.

The lights flashed again and Neji couldn't tear his gaze away, no matter how badly he wanted to. The purple and blue flashes caught the reddish-gold tints in her hair, making its length shimmer, and Neji remained frozen in place as Sasuke slowly shut the door after them.

In shock Neji stayed exactly where he was for a long time. Finally, the stinging in his palm grounded him again and he glanced down in surprise at the shards of glass embedded in his skin – he'd never even noticed his tightening grip or the shattering of the glass. He frowned as shock receded and control started to return – why would Tenten lie to him? Why would she be meeting Uchiha here of all places? And in the deserted storage part of the club no less … a corridor that was imprinted in his memories for all time. His fists clenched again but he ignored the pain as he contemplated the idea of what Sasuke and Tenten might be doing behind closed doors. The idea of the Uchiha touching her, kissing her, undressing her, wouldn't leave him be and, in a sick sort of fascination, he watched his memory replaying Tenten sinking to her knees … Sasuke's features distorted with pleasure.

His stomach heaved and Neji pushed his way past the dancers, out of the room and down the stairs. The crowd opened for him much as it had done for Sasuke but, distantly, Neji thought that it had more to do with his murderous expression than anything else. Finally outside, he leaned against the brick of the building and took a few deep breaths, fighting the nausea down. The fresh air calmed him, cleared his head, and Neji leaned back against the side of the building, staring at the implacable stars, firmly ignoring the unfamiliar pain in his gut as he tried to reason his way through what he'd just witnessed.

* * *

**_A/N: Meh, Neji isn't exactly right in this chapter ... I don't know. He didn't feel like letting me into his head today hence the scene jumps instead of going into the characters' thoughts. Don't worry that will still come, mostly I wanted this chapter to give the reader an overview of what's going on. So, what did you think? Picking up in pace now? More interesting? Maybe even, dare I hope, exciting? Lol. I won't get my hopes up for that but I would love it if you left me a review! Pretty please?_**


	13. Chapter 13

_**A/N: Thank you so much for the 100+ reviews! You guys rock and I'm sincerely humbled by the response to this story – your feedback means a lot. A shorter chapter this time and more of an 'event' one as opposed to a 'thoughts and emotions' one but I hope that it's not too terrible and that you like it … Though some more questions are raised in this chapter, we do get some answers (or, well, hints at least ^^), like why Sasuke hates Neji so much and I hope that you'll enjoy it! **_

_**Warnings: Meh, do I really have to say it? All the usual warnings apply though this is not an explicit chapter in any sense**_

_**Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto**_

* * *

_**Chapter 13**_

The door shut behind Sasuke and, though she knew it was impossible, Tenten could hear the slam of the lock echoing through the corridor. She stood frozen in sudden dread, eyeing the Uchiha warily and firmly tried to push the feeling of being trapped away. The wavering quality of the light from the bared bulb in the low ceiling cast period pockets of darkness across Sasuke's features and the malevolent air she'd come to associate with Sasuke being high seemed to surge all around them both.

Tenten took a deep breath, then another, steeled herself and finally spoke, "I'm not playing your games anymore. I'm done. I'm willing to repay the money I owe you but that's it. You'll just have to live with having sacrificed your time to help someone else." Having said her piece Tenten crossed her arms and waited impatiently.

Sasuke smirked and, after a moment of amused contemplation, he replied, "Sure. If that's what you want – got 20 grand?" He did not even look very surprised when Tenten– even in the poor light - paled visibly.

"T-twenty?" Tenten gasped, shaking her head in denial, "No way. There's no way…"

"That's including interest of course – my time doesn't come free," he interrupted smoothly. The amusement in his voice made her skin crawl but Tenten valiantly tried to rally her shocked thoughts.

"That's impossible. I haven't got 20 grand and you know it! You're just plucking a ridiculous figure from the air," she protested without much hope of dissuading him.

Sasuke shrugged nonchalantly as he brushed past her and began to make his way further down the hallway. "You don't have to pay me 20 grand – you've got a choice," he threw over his shoulder.

Reluctantly Tenten followed after him and, a short way down the hallway, Sasuke paused in front of a door. He opened it to reveal a small room, decorated with dusty boxes and empty crates.

"In," he ordered shortly, "we need to talk and I'd prefer to not do it in a hallway where anyone can hear."

Tenten's mouth twisted with distaste but she swept past him with her head held high. In the middle of the room she came to a halt and whirled around to glare at the raven-haired Uchiha.

"What do you mean I've got a choice?" she snapped.

His back was turned as he slowly closed the door behind them and he stood for a moment, as if gathering his thoughts, before turning to face her again. He leaned back against the door and crossed his arms.

"Of course you've got a choice – don't sound so shocked, Tenten. I've never forced you to do anything why would I start now? You haven't got 20 grand, so I thought to myself, what would be a fair way for you to repay me? And, finally, it hit me: you'll pay me in exactly the same way you incurred the debt in the first place. For the next few months _you'll_ be the one entertaining _me_. You'll be running around ensuring I get my highs whenever I want them. It's only fair, don't you think? Or, if that option doesn't appeal, you can always try to come up with the 20 grand – I'm not unreasonable, I'll give you a week to get the money." He shrugged carelessly as if it didn't much matter to him which option she chose.

Tenten glared at him. She'd never thought it possible to hate anyone as much as she hated Sasuke in that moment. He knew very well that it wasn't that simple – she couldn't just pluck drugs from thin air – not to mention that , in effect, she would be at his beck and call for the next few months which meant more lies…

She shook her head vigorously, "No. I won't do it." Without waiting for a reply she stalked past him to the door. She'd just turned the knob, body tensed for any sign of movement on Sasuke's part though he hadn't stirred an inch, when Sasuke's voice sounded from behind her.

"Your choice. Hyuuga's face when he finds out about your schemes should make up for quite a bit of money lost."

Tenten froze. Frantic thoughts whirled in her mind as she tried to see a way past threat implicit in his silky tone – surely he wouldn't really go that far? To simply get his way? But deep down Tenten knew that he would be exactly as bad as his word – she'd foolishly allowed herself to hope that presenting a strong denial of Sasuke's expectations would be enough to get him to back down – but, as always, she'd allowed hope to get the better of logic. Sasuke wasn't your average schoolyard bully – her attempts to stand up to him only seemed to amuse him. She jumped and couldn't suppress the small shriek that welled up from deep inside when Sasuke's warm breath suddenly brushed against the sensitive skin just behind her ear.

"I always did say that I would pay to see Hyuuga fall."

He reached past her and twisted the doorknob, propelling her forward and into the hallway with a hand at the small of her back. Tenten watched as if from far away, barely aware of Sasuke reaching around her again to pull the door closed. She shook her head to try and force the fog surrounding her mind to fade but somehow couldn't manage to make her eyes lift from where they were fixed on the floor. The skirting was peeling away from the wall, Tenten noted in detached interest.

"When you change your mind, I'll be in the next room."

* * *

Neji stared at the small glass filled with liquid oblivion that rested on the polished wood of the bar with deep concentration. He'd re-entered the club intent on waiting for Tenten by the door – she _would _explain herself - but the door she'd disappeared behind had still been firmly shut and there had been no sign of either her or Uchiha so he'd decided to have a drink while waiting for her to emerge.

Part of him cringed at his cowardice but, no matter how he tried to persuade himself to simply open the fucking door and step through to find Tenten, he couldn't quite manage to convince himself. Everything inside him seemed to cringe away from the prospect of coming upon Tenten in Sasuke's arms.

Drink after drink passed in front of him, despite his best efforts he seemed to be utterly unable to get drunk tonight, and the sense of betrayal slowly turned to rage. But whether he was angry at Tenten, Uchiha, or himself, he couldn't decide.

Suddenly it was all too much. Far too much. And he was damned if he'd sit here like the wronged husband while Sasuke stole Tenten away simply for the fun of it. _Why do you even care? She's just a girl, like any other_, he tried again to convince himself that it didn't matter who Tenten took up with. It had nothing to do with him – but, as all the times before, he failed miserably in the attempt.

It _did _matter. It mattered because when he touched her, when she touched him, the world righted itself. The first time he'd kissed her the conviction that they'd been made to do this with each other had been overwhelming. And, finally, Neji could admit that he'd been running scared from the moment he'd first laid eyes on her. Some part of him – some deep and hidden part that he could only acknowledge when all his barriers were down – had always know that she belonged to him, as he did to her.

The decision was made and the stage was set and if Neji was completely honest with himself he had always known that it would one day come to this – Uchiha would never forgive him for Sakura.

But Sasuke had overplayed his hand this time. Neji grimly downed the shot in front of him before pushing away from the bar. For Tenten … he would fight. And win.

* * *

The door creaked slightly but Neji knew that it was only his own heightened senses that could detect the sound over the pounding beat from the main room. He quickly slipped inside, half expecting Suigetsu or one of Sasuke's other shadows to be waiting for him, but the corridor was deserted. For a moment he stood, trying to discern any sound, any little hint, of where Tenten was.

Slowly he started down the corridor, stopping at every door to try and listen for sounds that would indicate it was occupied. Halfway down the hallway he finally heard voices – a low murmuring like a far-off brook running over stones worn smooth by time – and Neji pressed his ear against the door straining his hearing to try and make out what was being said. All his muscles tensed when suddenly Tenten's voice broke through the babble, clear as a bell.

"Sasuke, please! I'll pay you back in installments or something –"

For a moment Neji was so transfixed by her words – the pleading in her tone, she sounded close to tears – that he didn't register the hissing quality of her voice. Sasuke's low voice sounded and Neji realized that they'd moved away from the other voices and must be standing right on the other side of the door.

"No," the Uchiha's voice was calm – amused even, and Neji's eyes narrowed dangerously but he stilled the rage boiling through him to listen carefully to the words the other boy spoke, "you don't have 20 grand and you're not going to get it any time soon. These are my terms, take it or leave it – if you want Hyuuga-"

Neji's eyes widened in surprise. What did he have to do with all of this? But Tenten had interrupted Sasuke again.

"Please. I'll get the money."

She sounded desperate and with a quick shake of his head Neji focused on the present and decided to worry about why his name had cropped up in their low-voiced conversation later. Frowning he tried to orient himself, it appeared as if Tenten owed Sasuke money – a lot of money.

Neji stepped away from the door, staring at the wood in confusion. This was not what he'd expected to find at all – and for a moment he stood indecisively. Then, as if his brain had already wrapped itself around the new information without any input from him at all, Neji reached for the doorknob, decision made.

Nothing mattered more than getting Tenten away from the Uchiha and since the hold he had on her seemed to involve money … well, that was something Neji could change.

The cold metal turned smoothly in his hand and Neji took a deep breath as he pushed the door inward.

* * *

Tenten couldn't help the squeak of surprise that escaped when the door suddenly opened in front of her. Her eyes widened, her legs began to shake and her thoughts seemed to get stuck in one circuitous pattern. _Oh, god, not Neji – please no. Why is he here?_

To her left Sasuke seemed to have recovered from his surprise and he crossed his arms casually. "Private party, Hyuuga. You've heard of the concept?" He smirked at Neji but from the corner of her eye Tenten could see the way Sasuke's fist clenched under the cover of his crossed arm. _Why does he hate Neji so much? _She wondered despairingly for the millionth time.

Neji grimaced at Sasuke as his eyes quickly swept around the room. Taking in the dingy light, the sagging, dirty couches, the boxes stacked haphazardly – and finally, the threatening air of the people gathered there. From his expression – the grim set of his mouth – Tenten knew that he recognized most of the people present for what they were and that he was not impressed by the company she'd suddenly decided to keep. She had the hysterical urge to burst out laughing – Neji wouldn't honestly think that she _wanted _to be here, surrounded by drug-lords and their followers, would he?

She turned fearful eyes up to Neji's pearlescent ones already cringing from the condemnation she was sure would be there but, to her surprise, his eyes were very nearly blank. And far colder than any of the dangerous men's eyes that were currently watching the spectacle in front of them with wary curiosity.

Another small shriek escaped when Tenten felt a hand clamp firmly around her upper arm but she relaxed slightly and bit her lip to keep from protesting when she recognized Neji's touch. She was utterly unable to look at him, unable to even begin formulating explanations that he was sure to want, but all other thoughts flew from her mind when a wad of bills hit Sasuke firmly in the chest. She turned warily to Neji, not really sure that it _had_ been him throwing money around.

Sasuke made no move to pick up the money lying at his feet, only arched an eyebrow at Neji. The latter glared at the Uchiha – the fire the gesture should've contained instead covered in hundreds of layers of ice, somehow making it all the more threatening.

"Five thousand," Neji hissed, hostility surrounding him like a dark cloud, "you'll get the rest tomorrow." Without another word or glance Neji yanked Tenten around and pushed her out the door, careful to position his body so he stood between her and Sasuke and the rest of the room. At the door he paused and spoke carefully over his shoulder.

"It's done – we're even. Let it rest."

The door closed on Sasuke's expressionless face and instinctively Tenten turned to Neji – the million questions in her mind shimmering in her eyes – but he held up a warning hand.

"You owe me an explanation – but not here."

He turned and walked away, leaving Tenten with no choice but to follow meekly after him, through the throngs of people and out into the blessedly clean and clear night air.

* * *

_**A/N: As you've noticed this story will be multi-climactic and we're heading into Neji's secrets next … I really hope that I'm not boring anyone! How was it? Interesting? What do you think Neji did to Sakura that makes Sasuke hate him? I can't wait to hear your thoughts so please leave me a review and let me know what you think =D**_


	14. Chapter 14

_**A/N: Thank you to everyone who read/reviewed/alerted/favorited! I'm so very sorry for the long delay in updating – again! I have no real excuse: laziness combined with a total lack of inspiration made it very difficult for me to get this chapter written. But it's here now and to say sorry I've included a bit of a look at Neji and Sasuke's past ^^ I hope you like it! Don't forget to let me know what you thought of the chapter!**_

_**Warnings: Usual ones but again, not an explicit chapter**_

_**Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto – if I did Sasuke wouldn't currently be so crazy**_

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_**Chapter 14**_

Low clouds scurried frantically across a star-studded sky, the full moon hanging low over the branches of the tall trees that rimmed the Hyuuga estate. Neji took the turn too fast – always too fast – and then they were shooting through the wrought-iron gates and onto the graveled drive. The walk from the club to her car had been completed in silence, a silence that had only been broken by Neji's terse demand for Tenten's keys once they'd reached her car. He'd peeled out of the parking-lot, anger in every turn of the wheel and Tenten hadn't dared comment on anything. She hadn't even asked where they were going when Neji had driven past the turn-off that would lead them to her house.

Slightly hysterical, Tenten watched mutely as the trees flitted past, their shadowy shapes blurring to form a nauseating flash of darkness within darkness, and she prayed that she wouldn't succumb to either the tears or the laughter that kept bubbling in her gut. Instead of following the drive up to the main entrance Neji turned right abruptly and then they were travelling along a narrow dirt road – the dirt was neatly swept and without the usual ditches, Tenten noted in vague amusement.

Truth be told she was far beyond anything like coherent thought. The cat was out of the bag and now she would have no choice but to tell Neji the truth. Sasuke would not take kindly to the way Neji had treated him tonight and Tenten couldn't avoid the sinking feeling that she would be the one to pay the price for Sasuke's humiliation at Neji's hands. She slowly unclenched her fingers when they drew to a halt around the side of the sprawling house – it appeared as if they had circled around and would now enter through one of the wings.

Neji killed the engine and immediately got out, setting off toward a door that was almost hidden by the overhanging ivy that climbed haphazardly across the side wall. He didn't look back, didn't make any motion that indicated Tenten should follow, but she followed anyway - sure that he wasn't nearly done with her yet. The small door opened directly onto a plain wooden staircase and as Tenten bemusedly trudged after Neji through the semi-darkness – a couple of lamps were lit – she realized that they must be entering the main house through the servants' entrance or something of the sort.

Her attempts at distraction were to no avail and no sooner had the thought crossed her mind than it was already gone and Tenten was back to focusing on Neji's tall, shadowed frame ahead of her and worrying about what was to come. They'd entered the house proper by this time, if the decoration of the hallway was anything to go by – expensive carpets decorated the polished wooden floor and more lamps were lit – but Tenten had paid almost no attention to where they were going. She nearly ran into Neji's back when he abruptly turned and yanked another door open and suddenly they were in Neji's bedroom and there was no turning back.

Tenten swallowed nearly audibly, already mentally cringing as she waited for Neji to turn on her once she was safely inside and the door firmly locked, but he ignored her and went straight to the walk-in closet, the door of which was slightly ajar. In confusion, Tenten stared after Neji. The sound of a combination lock spinning could be heard and as if it was unlocking _her _Tenten found her legs were working again. She followed but hesitated in the doorway.

Neji was crouched in front of a small gun-safe, almost hidden in the shadows at the very back of the closet, pulling more bills out of the small box, but what held Tenten's attention was not the contents spilling out of the safe – various pills and powders mixed with money – but the smooth, sleek barrel of a deadly looking pistol that lay on the shelf just in front of Neji. She stared transfixed, and for the first time, she really understood what kind of world she'd stumbled into.

Blindly, trustingly, she'd followed after Neji wherever he went, sure that he, and all the others, were really no different from her. But Temari had been right: they were different. Very different. Neji finally straightened up and seeing her horrified expression he followed her gaze to the gun he'd not yet replaced in the safe.

Tenten's eyes lifted involuntarily to meet his gaze – blank as ever - and she whirled around quickly, trying to put some distance between them. _Or maybe you're trying to avoid the gun … and the almost instinctive reaction you have to it. You admired it, wanted it … _the voice in the back of her mind insinuated itself into her confused thoughts and Tenten shook her head violently, in denial but also in the hopes of clearing her head. So Neji had a gun – so what? _Doesn't mean he's ever used it_, she argued with herself, so absorbed in her internal wrangling that she jumped when Neji brushed past her and angrily tossed another wad of bills onto his bed.

"Ten grand," he muttered, "I don't keep more on me. We'll have to get the other five from the bank tomorrow." He walked to the window, his stride agitated, his fists clenched, but when he reached the far wall Tenten could see his shoulders relaxing - the deep breaths he took.

Before he could say anything Tenten decided to speak up – offense was better than defense after all. "Why do you have a gun?"

Neji turned and shot her an unreadable look, "What does that have to do with anything? A tool of the trade, one can almost say," his voice was filled with irony.

Tenten opened her mouth again, still not really sure why it bothered her so much, and she had no idea of how to articulate it to Neji, but this time he beat her to it. Quickly closing the distance between them he stood directly in front of her, forcing her to look him straight in the eye. "Why does it matter, Tenten?"

She shook her head, "Have you ever … shot … anyone?" she asked thickly, fear spreading its cool fingers down her spine – but it wasn't fear for herself. One thing she was entirely sure of was that Neji would never hurt her – not physically. No, it was fear _for_ Neji that made the hair on the back of her neck rise.

"I repeat: does it matter?" Neji asked, his voice dropping to a whisper. He reached out and tucked a strand of her hair behind her ear, the caress lingering on her cheek as his hand slid to the back of her neck, drawing her body closer. His lips brushed hers lightly as he whispered, "If I had, does it change this, Tenten?"

The kiss deepened and Tenten could feel her unresisting body swaying toward his. Shamefully she admitted to herself that no, it didn't matter. Would never matter. Whatever he'd done, he was still Neji and that was all that would ever be important to her. He drew back and Tenten slowly opened her eyes. His hand drew a burning path down her neck to come to rest over her heart. "Does it change anything?" he murmured, almost to himself, and Tenten closed her eyes again – hating how he had such complete control over her.

"No," she whispered back unwillingly, "you know how I feel – and nothing can change that." It was the closest they'd come to speaking of her confession since Neji'd told her to stay if she wanted to and Tenten waited with bated breath for his response. He drew away, shutters coming down over his eyes, expression suddenly business-like.

"You've got your money. Now talk," his voice was low, calm, but the piercing gaze he leveled her with had her cringing away from him as if his barely veiled censure could be physically felt.

She glanced away and saw the wad of money again. Her mouth twisted and she couldn't keep the bitterness from her voice when she replied, "Does this make it better? Are _we _even now, Neji? Now that you've paid your whore?"

* * *

The door had barely swung shut after Neji when Suigetsu detached himself from the rest of the on-lookers and approached Sasuke. The Uchiha still stood frozen in place, money at his feet, his eyes burning holes in the wood of the door. He couldn't believe that Hyuuga would actually say anything about their unspoken enmity. Neither had ever referred to the contention between them – or the reasons for it – before. The wheels turned and slowly a glimmer of understanding began dawning in Sasuke's mind.

Suigetsu drew to a halt next to the frowning Sasuke and barely bothered to try and disguise the mocking tone of his voice. Sasuke's frown deepened and he distractedly reflected that he couldn't let them see it as a defeat, couldn't let them think that Hyuuga had won, but those were concerns for another time.

"So, that's it? You're just going to take the money and be done with it?" the edges of sarcasm in Suigetsu's voice sharpened when he continued, "Wouldn't that be like acknowledging Hyuuga won?"

The words were a statement though he phrased it as a question and Sasuke gritted his teeth and clenched his fists to keep from resorting to violence. Suigetsu would have to wait … there were more important realizations on his mind.

The more Sasuke thought on it the more convinced he became … Hyuuga's behavior had been highly out of character. Since when was he in the business of bailing out damsels in distress? Since when did he care? Even if he'd appeared at the mansion with Tenten in tow – clearly there was something between them – Sasuke had never imagined that it could be anything serious. Had assumed that in typical Hyuuga fashion the other boy had simply been using Tenten further, that he'd seen the advantages of not having to go through the entire flirtation process each time when there was a perfectly willing girl right in front of him who knew the score.

Clearly that was not the case, Hyuuga cared enough to follow her – how else had he known to come here – he wouldn't waste his time following Sasuke, that was for sure. He cared enough to pay up, no questions asked, and Sasuke was under no illusions about that. The only reason Neji hadn't picked a fight – or at least tried to get some answers – was that he wanted Tenten out of there as quickly as he could manage. Tenten had never had a very clear idea of exactly the kind of danger she was in during her time in the room, but Neji wasn't an idiot and he knew the pitfalls of their world well enough to recognize that he had to get Tenten out.

So, all of this added up to only one thing, as far as Sasuke could discern: Neji didn't care about their long-standing antagonism or about the money – he only cared about Tenten's safety. It was worth 20 grand to him, or so it would appear …

Sasuke half-turned his body in Suigetsu direction, amusement apparent in his obsidian eyes, and began to laugh. The other boy took an involuntary half-step backward, eyeing the Uchiha warily. Though he was shaking with laughter, there was no real mirth in the gesture and Suigetsu knew Sasuke well enough to recognize the danger signs.

"How can you find it funny that Hyuuga one-upped you?" he couldn't help but throw in the taunt even as he stood in readiness to get out of the way should Sasuke snap.

Dark hair flew out and meshed briefly with the shadows before sinking back down to fall on pale cheeks, as Sasuke shook his head, still laughing. Through the laughter he stared at Suigetsu who looked poised for flight and that only made him laugh all the harder.

Finally he managed to gain control of himself and he pushed his bangs out of his face, "I don't think that I'm the one on the losing end at all, Suigetsu," he answered the other boy, "in fact, I never imagined that my weapon would be so effective." Another short bark of laughter, and Sasuke shook his head in disbelief as he turned to rejoin the group of people in the middle of the room – he still had some business to transact.

Suigetsu shook his head in confusion, "What?" he asked skeptically staring after the Uchiha, "Sure didn't look that way from where I was standing. I don't understand what you mean."

Sasuke paused and glanced over his shoulder, "I know you don't and I don't expect you to. Leave thinking to those actually qualified for it. But I'm feeling magnanimous so I'll let you in on a little secret."

The confusion on Suigetsu's features deepened and Sasuke smirked, "You see, Hyuuga loves her." Sasuke turned away leaving a still somewhat confused Suigetsu to stare after him with the sinking feeling that he did _not_ want to know what the Uchiha was planning.

* * *

Sasuke stared at the drink he was idly swirling; the flashing lights, interspersed by the shadows of the writhing dancers, made the amber liquid sparkle like precious stones. He couldn't quite keep his thoughts from events of earlier though and his hand tightened involuntarily. Memories had been assailing him all evening – ever since he'd come to the realization that Neji finally loved someone too – and now Sasuke shrugged, his mouth thinning as he gave himself over to the tide waiting to spill over from his sub-conscious.

It was almost a relief to be carried away by the rush, to relive sunshine sparkling on long, dark lashes framing eyes as green as the clear waters of the Mediterranean oceans. Sasuke smiled bitterly. Oh, yes, he knew all too well what Neji felt like at the moment – after all he'd been the first to succumb to the weakness of love. Or what he'd thought was love – Itachi had been right after all, or rather, his way had turned out better for Sasuke than trying to forge his own path.

Sasuke shook his head to dislodge soft hair, silky skin and beguiling eyes from his thoughts but before he could shore the tide up tightly – lock it in the box where he kept all the memories firmly hidden away – another had taken its place. Just as poignant, just as bittersweet, but in a vastly different way …

_The day was overcast though the sun made valiant attempts to break through the cover of clouds – even succeeding from time to time. The places where the sun touched when another brief battle had been won, seemed to burn with its warming light long after clouds had moved in to block the rays from view. It made the dew sparkle on the grass, it made the leaves of the trees seem to glow with an unearthly green light and it picked up on the diamond patches laced through the stone in front of him._

_The sound of pebbles sliding on the gravel of the path had Sasuke's head jerking up from his contemplation and he stared curiously at the intruder. It was rare that anyone aside from him came to this section at this time of day – the morning wasn't very old after all and people usually had to store up their courage for this kind of trip._

_Sasuke stared at the newcomer. The boy – despite his very long – ridiculously long in Sasuke's opinion – dark hair, he was quite obviously male and Sasuke's age or close to it. His skin was pale, his eyes light, and he wore unremarkable clothing though Sasuke could see that they were of good quality. A visitor then, not a vagrant, Sasuke decided musingly._

_The other boy seemed to be completely unaware of Sasuke's presence just a few rows away – he was focused on the single, white orchid he held in his hand. He stared at it for a long time, as if debating with himself, and Sasuke stared at the unknown boy wondering what he was doing. It seemed to be his first trip here, of that Sasuke was sure, only newcomers to the world of death were ever this hesitant, this unwilling to let go._

_Finally the boy knelt down in front of a large, square gravestone and another patch of light made it through, falling directly on the kneeling boy. The gravestone was very new, Sasuke noted, now that the sunlight threw the carving in such sharp relief. The boy's hair swung forward as he placed the orchid precisely but the angle of the sun made it possible for Sasuke to see the single teardrop that fell and glistened on the boy's hand, for a moment sparkling in the sunlight with all the brilliance of a crystal, before the boy wiped it away on his jeans._

_Ever after Sasuke would wonder what on earth made him get up from his own kneeling position a few rows back. But in that moment he knew that he shared a bond of kinship with this boy – a bond that not even Naruto could ever really understand. _

_Sasuke made sure to walk on the gravel path so the sound of his footsteps would alert the boy and give him some time to regain his composure. He hesitated next to the row where the boy knelt but when the light eyes rose to his – devoid of any emotion despite what he had witnessed a moment ago – Sasuke stepped onto the grass and slowly made his way to the expectantly waiting other. _

_His entire body was sending out aggressive 'what do you want' vibes but Sasuke ignored it and simply waited until the boy had also risen to his feet._

"_I'm Sasuke," he introduced himself._

_After a long moment of silence the other replied in a tone filled with wariness, "Neji."_

_They turned to the gravestone in front of them simultaneously as if they were waiting for an introduction to issue from the unfeeling stone and then glanced away, embarrassed._

"_The first time's always the hardest," Sasuke said, almost to himself, and abruptly changed the subject. "Where do you go to school? I haven't seen you around before."_

"_I'm new," the boy named Neji replied warily. _

_Sasuke turned and began to walk away, "I'll see you at school later then."_

_One small, meaningless conversation had led to a wary respect which quickly turned into a wary liking. Sasuke couldn't ever remember making a friend so quickly, so instantaneously almost – but perhaps it had to do with the setting of their first meeting, he never really tried to fathom the why's of their strange friendship. And it wasn't until much later that week, when they'd again met at the cemetery and Neji had finally told Sasuke that his mother was buried there, that Sasuke had known that the inexplicable affinity baffled the other boy as much as it did him._

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_**A/N: Review?**_


	15. Chapter 15

_**A/N: I can't actually believe that I'm on schedule with the update ^^ Thank you so much for all of the reviews/alerts/favorites – your response totally inspired me! We see some more flashbacks and a small revelation (that won't come as a surprise to anyone I'm sure) involving the enmity between Neji and Sasuke. Also, I'm not sure anymore if I made it clear earlier on but the characters are, at present, about 17-18 years old. I hope that you enjoy it. I don't know if you'll like this chapter … erm … let me know what you thought!**_

_**Warnings: Language, drug and alcohol abuse, and lemons! Don't like? Don't read!**_

_**Disclaimer: Yeah, right, like Kishi-sama will care enough that I'm writing a fanfic with his characters to check whether I disclaimed ownership xD … still, rules are rules: I do not own Naruto or the characters used in this story – they are the property of Masashi Kishimoto.**_

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_**Chapter 15**_

"What did you say?" Neji's deadly whisper cut through the uncomfortable silence that had descended after Tenten's bitter pronouncement.

Tenten swallowed – maybe she'd pushed Neji too far this time – but the confusing welter of emotions wouldn't be suppressed and she abruptly decided that maybe she owed it to herself to get it all off her chest. After all, when Neji heard the whole truth there was no way that he would be staying and maybe the only way to get closure was to get it all out – and if, in the process, she managed to hurt him as much as he'd hurt her then that was an added bonus, Tenten decided grimly.

"I said are we even now you've paid me," she finally answered, her head held high though her voice wavered and broke a little. Neji was nearly vibrating with emotion and the part of her that wasn't scared of this sudden, explosive confrontation wondered why her words would have such a profound effect on him.

He took a deep breath, reached out a hand and wound it in her hair, almost painfully so, and wrenched her head sideways, angling her mouth so his breath brushed against her lips and he could look into her eyes as he spoke.

"I don't pay for sex."

His mouth pressed lightly against hers and, as Tenten was sure he'd intended, her traitorous body responded to the slight caress.

"I don't have to. Unlike Uchiha – or have you forgotten how you whored yourself out to him?" His cruel, mirthless laugh made tears spring to her eyes.

Neji turned away before he lost all control. _That word … why did she have to pick that word_ … he wondered despairingly. The memories were dancing on the edges of his mind and, as they overwhelmed him, Neji clenched his fists…

"_What does it matter?" Neji cried in exasperation, throwing his hands up into the air, "she's just a girl – and there are plenty of those to be had." _

_The Uchiha's mouth thinned even more if that was even possible and the flickering of unease in the back of Neji's mind reared its head again. Why was Sasuke making such a big issue out of this – it wasn't as if they hadn't shared girls before. _

"_Sakura is – was – different. And you treated her like a whore!" Sasuke's voice snapped, his fists clenched and Neji could see that the other boy wasn't too far from resorting to violence. He tensed in expectation and watched almost distantly as the venom poured from his mouth – from somewhere deep, dark and hidden inside him – a part he hadn't even suspected he had._

"_Stop deluding yourself, Uchiha. If she's a whore it's because you made her so."_

Neji took a deep breath and forced the memories to recede. He had less than no desire to rehash the past, even in the privacy of his own mind. He walked to the wall furthest from Tenten – before he succumbed to the temptation to smack some sense into her – and leaned a palm against the wall, the other hand clenching by his side. When he felt sufficiently in control of his voice he finally broke the silence, still without looking at Tenten.

"I have _never_ treated you like a whore. What would make you think that I was paying you when I was only trying to help you?"

The words were deceptively mild, the tone calm, but the fact that Neji kept his back turned told Tenten just how angry he was and she swallowed hard even as she forced herself to continue with what she'd started.

"What else am I supposed to think?" she asked quietly, aware of the undertones buzzing like flies now. She had no idea what Neji was thinking but more importantly she had no idea what he _meant_ – what the words beneath the words were supposed to tell her – and she forced herself to focus on more than just his tone of voice.

"Did you think at all?" Neji asked cryptically, finally turning away from the wall and facing her again though he still kept a reasonable distance between them.

Tenten shook her head in confusion. Try as she might she could never come out on top in a confrontation with Neji. He confused her – one minute she was sure she finally had a handle on him only to be wrong-footed by the next sentence to leave his mouth.

_This is your chance,_ Tenten thought stoically. He was giving her a perfect opening to confess – and confess she must, could delay no longer – but a part of her already grieved the loss of him and, in a vain attempt to keep some of her pride intact, Tenten made her tone as strident as she could though it seemed her voice wanted to waver and crack. God knew, where Neji was concerned, she had no pride to speak of.

"You're right – I didn't think. I don't think I've thought a single action through properly since you came back into my life. And I definitely haven't since I went to Sasuke for help."

Neji froze, a stillness so complete that he appeared to have been carved from ice. Tenten winced but the words continued to pour from her, "That's right. I went to Sasuke for help. After you – after you left me there … the first time …" her voice trailed away, though she valiantly tried to force the words to continue. The silence dragged unendurably until Tenten found herself talking, pouring her heart out to the cold, silent boy in front of her. In the back of her mind that detached part of herself whispered that it was strange how people always had to fill a silence if they were afraid of the reaction their words would incite. Tenten felt the urge to giggle bubbling up from the pit of her stomach only to be drowned out by a wave of sadness before it could manifest.

"You got up and you left and I _still_ loved you."

She took a deep breath, not even noticing the intent way Neji was listening to her unburdening, "I had to go to Sasuke. Don't you see?" She turned a pleading gaze to his blank eyes, "I thought I hated you and that I wanted to leave you wondering what you'd done wrong. But turns out, I only wanted a little more time with you." Her breathing was ragged by the end of her rant, and the tears refused to be held at bay any longer. Tenten sank down onto Neji's bed, burying her face in her hands, her body wracked by silent sobs.

Slowly she realized that Neji still hadn't moved, that he wasn't making any effort to try and ease her pain, he wasn't even fighting back. _Fight back, damnit, _she screamed inwardly but her silent entreaty had no effect and a fresh wave of sobs broke over her.

At long last the tears seemed to dry up and, once her breathing had returned to some-what normal, she heard Neji sigh. A hard voice broke through her misery.

"And what did you promise him in return for his kind services?"

Tear-stained eyes rose to Neji's in surprise and he laughed bitterly, "I've known Uchiha far longer than you, Tenten. What did he want in return?"

He walked –stalked - over and crouched down in front of her, taking her chin between his thumb and forefinger in a nearly bruising hold, "What incentive did you offer? Your body? It can't be something as mundane as money, he has enough of that."

Tenten turned away, surprised when he let her go, and whispered, "Nothing. He asked for nothing."

"I find that hard to believe," Neji hissed as he straightened out of his crouch, hauling Tenten along with him unceremoniously. For the first time that she could remember Tenten felt truly afraid of what Neji would do. A strange, fervent light burned in his usually calm eyes and, though he wasn't above using his superior physical strength to seduce her, he'd never before exercised such force when touching her. She tried to wriggle her wrist out of his hold only to have him whirling around to face her again.

"He said he'd do it for the pleasure of witnessing your humiliation," she gasped, trying to pull away but at her words Neji froze again and his grip tightened so Tenten cried out in pain, "Please, Neji, you're hurting me!"

Abruptly he let her go, pushing away from her as if he'd been burned, disquiet in his eyes. For a moment Neji stared at Tenten, rubbing her wrist and wincing, as if he couldn't quite believe his eyes before turning away from her and running an agitated hand through his hair.

"Fuck!"

The expletive ripped through the strangely surreal web of silence that had enveloped them in their own private cocoon and Tenten watched warily as Neji paced back and forth. Finally she could stand the silent pacing no more and she gathered her courage again.

"Is that bad? I mean … worse than just what the words imply?" she asked tentatively.

An incredulous laugh bubbled from Neji's lips as he stopped pacing and turned to face her again, "You have no idea what you've done," he finally whispered before turning away again.

Tenten shook her head in confusion, "I-I don't understand…" she admitted hesitantly.

He moved so fast that Tenten jumped back in fright when he suddenly appeared directly in front of her, losing her balance and falling back onto his bed. Neji slowly lowered himself to sit beside her, running a caressing hand from her throat down to her stomach, watching the path his hand made in an almost absentminded fashion.

"Are you even real? Did he make you so that I couldn't stay away? Is this nothing more than his revenge?" he spoke mostly to himself and Tenten stared up at him with wide-eyes wondering what on earth was going on and why Neji appeared to have suddenly lost his mind.

But it seemed more important to calm him down, to reassure him, than to answer the questions whirling in her mind and she reached up and stroked a strand of long, chocolate hair away from his eyes and whispered, "I'm real."

The hand ceased its stroking, became frantic with need, as Neji pulled urgently at her clothing, in too much of a hurry to bother with more than pushing her shirt up and pulling her pants from her legs, and he merely undid the buttons on his jeans before he moved so he covered her body with his own. The emotional maelstrom hadn't subsided one little bit but Tenten found, when Neji sank into her with a heartfelt groan of desperate bliss, that it didn't matter. The harsh words and unspoken accusations faded and she gave herself up to the incessant tide of pleasure racing to engulf her, only thankful that he was still there.

His hips pushed forward unrelentingly and she could feel his release nearing in the frantic movement. She closed her eyes, savoring the feel of his skin sliding smoothly against her own.

"Open your eyes," came the command from between panted breaths.

Tenten opened her eyes slowly, barely able to see through the haze of pleasure, but everything crystallized into one perfect moment of clarity when Neji's mouth met hers, slowly, sweetly, despite the almost too-hard thrusts, and staring straight into his eyes she flew out into oblivion, moaning his name.

She came back down to earth to find him still staring intently into her eyes, his gaze burning in its intensity, desperation fueling the fire ever higher, and she was surprised that he'd held out for so long considering his state of mind and body. His hips snapped forward once more and he buried himself as deep as he could go. His eyes smoldered into hers, pleasurable aftershocks still running rampant through her body, and his eyes drifted closed as he let go. He groaned and buried his face in the crook of her neck, his body shuddering in helpless ecstasy.

"I love you," he whispered against her skin and Tenten froze in disbelief as he collapsed on top of her, his eyes closing and trembling breaths ripping from his chest.

* * *

_A pale moon sent its pearly rays to bathe the landscape a ghostly white color but Neji was oblivious to the beauty of the autumn night._

_His head reeled with the still some-what unfamiliar sensation of being high. Slowly he glanced around the patio. He seemed to be alone – as he wanted to be. From behind him light spilled out onto the cold, stone floor and the sound of voices and laughter drifted out into the night. Neji's mouth twisted bitterly. How dare they be happy? he wondered but the thought was fleeting and without any real conviction – he was too focused on his introspection._

_Events from earlier that day spun sickeningly in his mind. Another fight – worse than the last. How he wished he was older, stronger, able to face his uncle man-to-man. But he was only fifteen, and despite his current state, Neji was not stupid. He knew he had very little chance of standing up to his uncle and coming out on top._

'_You're just like your father!' the less than complimentary tone echoed through he recesses of his mind and Neji's hand clenched around the bottle of beer so tightly that he could almost hear the glass crack. With a sudden, violent movement he threw the bottle into the night, the sound of the glass shattering as it hit the brick path not soothing him in the least._

"_Are you okay?" a tentative voice asked from behind him. Dimly Neji was aware that the voice sounded as out of it as he felt._

"_Do I fucking look okay?" he snarled over his shoulder without looking to see who had intruded on his solitude. _

_The rustle of clothing greeted his ears and a flash of pink caught the edges of his vision as Sakura slowly lowered herself to sit next to him on the cold stone floor, also resting her feet on the step just below the one they were seated on._

"_What do you want?" Neji asked wearily after a long silence. The last thing he felt like doing was dealing with her giggling. Where was Sasuke anyway? He usually didn't let his pink-haired girlfriend stray too far from him on nights like this – parties this wild had broken up more than one relationship. It still amazed Neji – how the Uchiha had changed. From the withdraw but kind stranger in the cemetery, to the good kid with a bad older brother, to being a bad boy himself … Sasuke had changed faster than lightening in the five years Neji had known him, since he'd moved to this town to live with his uncle after his mother had died. But the biggest change of all had involved the pink-haired girl currently staring sympathetically at Neji from the corner of her eye. _

_He gritted his teeth – so he was a little depressed, so what? He hadn't asked for her pity – he didn't care how much more content Sasuke seemed to become in the girl's presence – more stable somehow – he wanted no part of it. Hadn't he vowed that no one would ever get close to him again? Had that really only been a few weeks ago? Only a few weeks of knowing the truth and yet, Neji couldn't recall the last time he'd been totally stone-cold sober._

_He shook his head and Sakura laid a gentle hand on his arm. "You might not think so but I know about being heart-broken. You don't have to but, if you ever need anything, you can come to me." She stood and dusted the seat of her pants, "It beats sitting alone out in the cold contemplating how crappy your life has become."_

_Something inside – a yearning for warmth maybe? – had him calling out after her. "What do you know about being unhappy? You have Sasuke, don't you?"_

_She paused, only two steps from him, and turned slowly and Neji was surprised by the aching depths of her green eyes. They were stormy oceans of longing after something you can never have, living only with what you could get, and the resultant pain of a life not quite living up to your expectations. Tears welled up in her eyes and Neji fought against the grimace. Fuck, he hoped she wouldn't cry. He hated a crying girl more than anything. _

_To his surprise she swallowed the tears and smiled sadly at him over her shoulder, "Yes," she acknowledged and as she turned to go he just caught the soft words she spoke._

"_But he doesn't love me." _

_For a moment exultant misery washed through his entire being. To not be totally alone, to see someone else in pain, somehow it made his own pain bearable and, before Neji could consider the action properly, he'd stood from his place at the top of the stairs leading to the darkened garden. Two quick strides brought him level with Sakura and he reached out to catch her hand. Both of them swayed unsteadily – alcohol and drugs making their footing precarious. _

"_Want to take a walk?" Neji asked quietly. Sakura stared up at him with distant eyes – glazed over with more than just a temporary high before she nodded her assent uncaringly._

_Still holding her hand, Neji led her down the steps – the last sober part of his brain screaming at him that this was incredibly stupid, it was dark and they were hardly steady on their feet but, as it turned out, those concerns didn't bear thinking about._

_At the end of the stairs a low wall curved the path around the side of the house, plunging them into darkness as they made their way slowly toward the trees that flanked the outside wall, and they walked just far enough into the shadows to ensure they were completely hidden from view from the house or the overhanging patio before they turned to each other in mutual need._

_Her arms wound around his neck and buried in his hair and Neji walked her backward until they melted into the gloom of the wall. There was no emotion, no connection, only quick, hurried fumbling and Neji was surprised to discover moments later that he was losing his virginity up against a wall – and to Sakura of all people._

* * *

Neji jerked awake, his heart pounding with memories and stared confusedly into Tenten's concerned eyes. For a long moment he stayed exactly where he was, not moving a muscle, and slowly became aware of his surroundings again. He was in his bed, Tenten wrapped around him, it was still dark, and … he'd told her that he loved her. He'd confessed the secret that he'd buried so deeply he hadn't even realized it himself.

Warily Neji looked at Tenten again and from her earnest gaze he deduced that she was thinking of the same thing. He glanced away – not really sure what he wanted from her. All he knew was that he would die rather than let Uchiha touch her, hurt her, in any way_. _It was him that Sasuke wanted to punish and Neji had to concede that he certainly had a right to it after what he'd done but Tenten was innocent in all of this. Dragged into this dangerous, messy business of broken promises and shattered dreams – all because he hadn't been strong enough to stay away from her.

He glanced back at her again and Tenten reached forward and cupped his cheek. "I love you, too," she whispered softly, lashes brushing her cheek, and an uncertain note in her voice as if she was afraid of his reaction to her statement.

A sighing breath escaped – of relief? Of pleasure at finally hearing her say the words? Neji leaned forward and brushed his lips against hers.

"Don't," he advised her quietly.

"I don't have a choice in that," Tenten returned just as quietly.

"Then promise me. Promise me that you will never go near Uchiha Sasuke again."

* * *

_**A/N: Er … Review? *makes puppy eyes***_


	16. Chapter 16

_**A/N: Quick, no? ^^ Thank you so much for the wonderful reviews – I felt you guys deserved another chapter just for that … so, here it is, in all its flawed glory xD Seriously, a lot happens in this chapter – necessary information is revealed - but I'm just not happy with the way it came out. Still, after two days of struggling with it and readjusting outlines, I'm fairly sure this is the best it's gonna get! Remember: con-crit is greatly appreciated, as always! So, I hope you enjoy it regardless of any errors (especially in terms of the flow, meh).**_

_**A special shout-out to crystaliris94: happy birthday! =D and thank you for your unwavering support – it means a lot to me!**_

_**Warnings: You know the drill, right? But a non-explicit chapter this time**_

_**Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto**_

* * *

_**Chapter 16**_

Sasuke stared grimly when he opened his locker door on Monday morning to find a cloth bank-bag sitting on the bottom shelf, a short note taped to the front: _Stay away._

He read softly to himself, his lips moving, caressing, the words before curving into an almost gentle smile. _No, Neji. I don't think I will._

Tapered fingers closed around the rough cloth and Sasuke glanced around to make sure no teachers were nearby. It wouldn't do for them to ask what he was doing with twenty thousand in cash. He quickly stowed the money in his bag, adding the five thousand Neji had thrown at him, and slammed his locker shut. The hallway buzzed with conversations, the sound periodically drowned out by metal clanging as doors were shut, but Sasuke paid the scene no mind. He walked slowly down the hallway, whistling softly to himself under his breath, the crowd moving automatically out of his way.

The line had been drawn. Finally.

Deliberately Sasuke dawdled through the hallways, making his way inexorably toward the Hyuuga's locker, not wanting to arrive while Neji was still in the vicinity. At last the hallway cleared completely as the students rushed off to class, and Sasuke drew to a halt in front of Neji's locker. Once more, he checked to see if he was being watched but no one was in sight and he quickly twirled the lock, shaking his head that Neji had never once changed the combination for his school locker since Sasuke had known him. Then again Neji wasn't stupid enough to keep anything in his locker that he didn't want anyone to find. _Until now_, Sasuke thought, another smile lifting the corners of his mouth.

He quickly placed the bag of money on the bottom shelf and picked up a pen lying there to add his reply to the bottom of the note.

_Her debt – not yours._

* * *

Neji slammed his palm into the locker next to his with all the force he could muster. His hand stung and he didn't feel any better but he forced himself to take a couple of deep breaths, allowing the calming rush of oxygen to soothe his anger. Ignoring the gasping whines of fright from the girls on his other side, he stared with blank eyes at the note taped to the bag.

Before Tenten he had been fearless. The childhood fear of abandonment had ceased with the death of his father and then his mother – he'd vowed never to let anything cow him ever again. But now he was afraid. Very afraid. The Uchiha seemed determined to make Tenten pay the price for Neji's mistakes and there was nothing he could do to stop it.

Wearily Neji leaned forward, using his body to block his actions from view, as he quickly stuffed the money into his bag. He closed the door softly, in striking contrast to his earlier violent reaction, and walked off slowly.

Maybe it would be for the best to simply let Tenten go? To tell her that he'd made a mistake, that he didn't love her, and hope that she believed him – surely a little heartache would be preferable to whatever Sasuke was planning to do to her? Memory flashed and Neji relived, again, the weekend that had passed.

Never before had he kissed anyone purely for the sake of a kiss in and of itself. Kisses, caresses, any kind of affectionate touch, had always merely been a tool. Now he reveled in the freedom to touch her, kiss her, only because he wanted to, not because his body's need was driving him to it. Slowly the realization had dawned that, with the confession, no matter that it had torn unwillingly from the depths of his soul, all obligation had ceased. For so long their relationship, or whatever it was, had been based purely on sex and he'd never even noticed the strain that was placing on him. But with the glimmer of feeling that had suddenly exploded into being that night he'd come to realize that he'd been afraid: afraid of losing her if he didn't keep her coming back for more. When she'd said that she loved him too, Neji had been amazed to realize that she _wanted _to be there, with him.

Abruptly Neji came to a halt in the middle of the hallway, ignoring the annoyed looks of the people behind him who were forced to walk around. There was no way, no way, that he could let that go. This time he would not sit back and let events unfold, complacently telling himself that everything was fine. His mouth tingled when he remembered her tongue stroking softly over his lower lip and Neji smirked as he began to make his way down the hallway.

_Wrong, Uchiha. Her debts _are_ mine._

* * *

Tenten jumped in fright when a hand detached itself from the shadows next to a bank of lockers, grabbing her arm and hauling her into the small stairway that led to the basement. It was late afternoon, she'd had to stay behind to talk to her English teacher about a paper, and the school was deserted. Late afternoon sunlight still streamed through the windows of the hallway but this little stairwell was already sunk in gloom.

Eyes wide with fright and trying to still the frantic thumping of her heart she turned to her assailant. Her eyes widened even more, then narrowed, when she made out Sasuke's face, half-hidden in shadow, only the gleam of his eyes really visible.

"Your boyfriend is beginning to annoy me," he said softly, letting go of her arm at last.

She yanked it out of his reach, stepping back to create some space between her and the Uchiha. She tried to take an unobtrusive breath; aware now of the lack of oxygen caused by fear and grimaced inwardly when she saw that Sasuke wasn't fooled. He smirked at her. Finally, her own annoyance won out over the shock of having been grabbed like that and she glared up at the dark-haired boy.

"What the hell is wrong with you? You nearly gave me a heart-attack! And, anyway, what's it to me if Neji's annoying you? You got your money, didn't you?"

She turned and, though uncomfortable prickles ran down the back of her neck, she resolutely kept her back to the Uchiha.

"Leave me alone," she threw over her shoulder, "we're done."

She'd just begun to think that maybe this time he'd let her go when a hand clamped down on the back of her neck, swiftly sliding up to tangle almost gently in her hair. Unceremoniously Sasuke yanked her backward, her back connecting with the solidity of his chest, his fingers stroking soothingly over her scalp.

"Wrong," he whispered into her ear, "we've only just begun."

Shock held her immobile but before she'd even begun to contemplate struggling Sasuke was already letting go. He pushed her ahead of him into the lighter hallway. In confusion Tenten whirled around to face him, suddenly not at all keen to turn her back on the Uchiha. He reached out and stroked a strand of hair behind her ear – where it had been before he'd incomprehensibly decided to run his hands through her hair. She froze. _What is he doing? _Tenten shook her head to dislodge the thoughts – she couldn't afford to stand like an idiot and let the Uchiha wrong-foot her with his actions so at odds with his words.

"Call your guard-dog off," he whispered, bending down so only inches separated them, "You're a big girl – pay your own debts."

The caress of his breath across her cheek made shudders of fear run down her spine and, almost as if she'd been released from a spell, Tenten found her voice again.

"You can't scare me anymore," she snapped sharply, taking a step back and glaring at him, "Neji knows."

To her surprise Sasuke began to laugh, a low, dark chuckle, and he turned away, lazy strides taking him further away from her with nothing resolved.

"Did you hear me?" she called after him in frustration.

Sasuke stopped. His head angled slightly and over his shoulder he answered, "You're assuming that I accepted the money," he said silkily, "I have no interest in Hyuuga's money. You'll pay me back as agreed."

"No!" Tenten couldn't keep the anger from her voice anymore, but decided that she didn't care if he saw he got under her skin.

A moment passed before Sasuke replied. "I'd rethink that answer, if I were you … considering where Hyuuga's money came from." He stopped at the door, hand on the handle, "The cops should find that bit of information interesting, don't you think?"

Then he was gone. Tenten stumbled sideways, turning when her shoulder connected with the cold metal of the lockers and sank to the floor, staring at the tiles with unseeing eyes.

_Caught. No way out. He'll never stop. What does he _want_? _Frantic thoughts whirled in her head, until at last, she could stand the whirlpool of emotion no longer and she lowered her head onto her knees and allowed the tears to flow freely.

* * *

_Confused images … colors … shapes … Tenten blinked and stared at her surroundings. The same school hallway that she saw every day shimmered hazily in her vision. She squeezed her eyes shut and, when she opened them, the scene had dissolved and reformed into a welter of flashing, whirling lights. She frowned and tried to focus her vision, realizing that the image seemed familiar. Slowly a pounding beat began … she wasn't sure if it was her heart or the music. She only knew that she'd never wanted to set foot in the club again._

_A flash of white caught the edges of her vision and she turned her head slowly to the left. Neji's hair flowed silkily over the pristine white of his shirt as he walked away, winding through the crowded shadows. Tenten opened her mouth but no sound came out. She shook her head, cleared her throat, and tried again. Still no sound … as if she had no voice … _

_In confusion she raised her hand, trying to touch her throat but her gaze jerked down in surprise when her hand wouldn't lift from her side. Fear spread out from the cold spot just below her heart as she stared at the black, scaly skin winding slowly around her waist binding her arms against her body. For the first time she became aware of the cold, dry touch of the coiling, twisting bodies … her head jerked frantically back and forth watching as the snakes slowly, inexorably tightened their hold on her … and cruel laughter sounded in her ears … She twisted her head backward, trying to see, and pale skin, dark eyes, dark hair floated into view, seemingly disembodied … _

_Hands, strikingly warm compared to the cold reptiles, wrapped around her shoulders and Tenten found herself unable to move. Her eyes turned back to where Neji had been, only to see him drawing further and further away … _

"_I own you," Sasuke's voice whispered sibilantly and she opened her mouth … released the silent scream that had been pressing against her chest …_

"Tenten! Wake up."

Hands were shaking her insistently but Tenten stared unseeingly into Neji's eyes. The dream began to recede, her sub-conscious yielding to her conscious mind, and she gasped, her hands flying to her throat.

"Neji," she whispered, relief flooding her at the sound of her slightly hoarse voice. She leaned forward, resting her forehead against his shoulder, thankfully drawing comfort from the warmth of his arms around her. They stayed that way for a long time before Tenten reluctantly raised her head, and drew back a little, pushing her hair out of her eyes.

Neji frowned at her. "You were screaming," he stated simply, not revealing how affected he'd been by the terror-filled sound of his name that had greeted him when he'd opened her bedroom door a few minutes ago. "Your parents probably heard it."

Tenten shook her head, "They're out." She stared warily up at Neji, "What was I screaming?"

Silence greeted her question but Tenten held his gaze until Neji looked away, "My name," he said quietly, still suppressing the unease he'd felt at the sound. What on earth had she dreamed he'd been doing to her?

She sighed, and took his hand, letting her fingers stroke through his, brushing lightly over his palms, "You were the good guy," she whispered and Neji refused to even contemplate the relief that flowed through him at her words.

Shaking her head decisively, Tenten took a firm hold of herself, "When did you get here? And – how?" she asked frowning suspiciously up at him.

"A few minutes ago," Neji replied, allowing her the change of subject, "and you have an exceptionally stupid hiding place for the spare key," he added frowning severely at her. "Anyone can get in – the first place they'll look is under the welcome mat." _Or that's the first place Uchiha will look at least, _he added silently to himself, hoping his seriousness would translate to Tenten that he wanted her to be careful without him having to explain it all.

A grimace and a small shake of her head was the only answer he got but Neji decided to let it go for now. Tenten lay back against the pillows, watching quietly as he divested himself of most of his clothes.

"Won't your uncle wonder where you go every night?" she asked hesitantly, aware that any discussion of his family was a sore spot.

Neji snorted derisively, "Let him wonder," he muttered, snapping the bed-side lamp off.

With a sigh of pure contentment Tenten snuggled closer, still marveling at the fact that his arms closed around her with no hesitation as he settled himself against the pillows. Still, the fear wouldn't entirely recede and Tenten was so tired of secrets … but she'd promised him to stay away from Sasuke and knew he wouldn't be happy to hear about the afternoon's events. Finally she gathered her courage and tried for the most cryptic comment she could make under the circumstances.

"He didn't take the money," she muttered, burying her face in the crook of his neck, breathing in the scent that clung to him, brushing her lips lightly over the silky skin for comfort. Almost reflexively his hold around her tightened.

"No," he agreed tightly and pressed a kiss against her temple, "Sleep, Tenten – I'm handling it."

For a moment surprise that he wasn't going to make an issue of the fact that she'd clearly had contact with the Uchiha, despite all the promises in the world, overwhelmed the realization that he'd somehow known as well, and Tenten opened her mouth to argue.

"Sleep," Neji commanded, his mouth pressing against hers, his tongue stroking reassuringly over her lower lip. Tenten sighed into the kiss and decided that she was too drained to argue further – tomorrow would see the problem still firmly present and, for now, she could just enjoy the heated planes of his body pressed against her, and the sound of his heartbeat lulling her slowly to sleep.

* * *

The scent of Neji's hair still clung faintly to the pillow and Tenten hugged it to her chest, breathing in the reassuring smell as she tried to calm the pounding of her heart. She took a deep breath, forced herself to meet the aquamarine gaze of her best friend. The night had passed almost too quickly – always too soon she had to say goodbye to Neji – and vaguely Tenten wondered what it would be like to wake up with him and not have to rush to get him out of the house before anyone realized he was there. What would it be like to be able to have breakfast with him? Get dressed with him? She shook her head to dislodge the wishing after shooting stars and focused on the girl on the other side of the room.

Temari stared warily at the brunette on the bed – from the way Tenten was clutching her pillow like a lifeline she was fairly sure that whatever the other girl wanted to discuss wasn't going to be something she'd like. She sighed and walked forward, perching on the end of the bed.

"So? You wanted to talk to me," she began but couldn't keep from adding sarcastically, "finally. I assume it has something to do with your spacey attitude of the last week."

Tenten took another deep breath, "Temari, you're my best friend – and after everything … I-I don't want to lie to you."

A blonde eyebrow arched but Temari stayed silent and Tenten gathered her thoughts.

"Firstly, I want you to know that I'm not using – or even drinking," Tenten laughed nervously, "I'm done with that – but I am seeing Neji."

There, she'd said the forbidden words – had confessed her secret and though she was already wincing expectantly she couldn't help the relief flowing through her. The girls stared at each other in silence, anger slowly suffusing Temari's expression – her cheeks burned brightly and her eyes glittered sharply.

"What?" Temari whispered. Tenten winced; she couldn't help it and clutched the pillow tighter, taking deep breaths.

"Are. You. Insane." Temari's voice was low – and the mere fact that her friend wasn't exploding with anger as usual made Tenten lean back a little.

"After – after … _everything_ … you-!" The long-awaited explosion finally took place and Tenten held up her hand to forestall more incoherent accusations.

"Please, Mari, just listen. I love him, and he loves me. And I know you don't understand that and I don't expect you to, but it would be nice if you could just shelve your personal prejudices and support me here. I swear to you, it doesn't mean that I'm having a relapse or anything." She leaned forward, watching the blonde hair vibrating as Temari bit down on her lip to keep from interrupting.

Tenten held the glare, met it with a hard glitter in her eyes, but inside she was desperately hoping that there was some way to reach reconciliation here. Temari leaned back, ran a hand through her bangs, and blew out an agitated breath. Tenten waited quietly. To her intense surprise, when Temari turned back to face her, her expression was guarded, a little afraid, and sadness lurked in her eyes.

"He loves you, huh?" she asked pensively, her gaze shifting to her hands now folded in her lap. Tenten finally let go of the pillow and leaned forward, sitting on her knees, and grabbed hold of Temari's hand.

"He does, Mari," she whispered earnestly.

Temari shook her head slowly, a mirthless laugh shaking her frame and she carefully pulled away from Tenten's hold.

"Yeah?" she turned slightly and leveled Tenten with an intent look, "Then you should be careful, Ten. Girls Hyuuga Neji loves have an unfortunate tendency to wind up in hospital."

Confusion darkened hazel eyes and Tenten shot her friend a questioning glance. Sitting back on her knees she shook her head slowly, trying to make sense of Temari's words, "What do you mean?" she asked, at last.

"Occasional advantage of dating Shikamaru – you hear interesting things … " Temari's voice trailed away thoughtfully before she turned to Tenten and spoke in a stronger voice – the voice of someone absolutely convinced of the truth of their words, "You remember, a couple of years ago, Sakura was out of school for months after falling from a first-story window? She was in hospital for weeks - and there were all those rumors about rehab and pregnancy?" Temari's mouth twisted with distaste but Tenten barely noticed.

"What does that have to do with Neji?" She glanced anxiously at Temari, fear already tightening her insides.

"Ask him," Temari shrugged wearily, "he's the one who put her through the window in the first place."

* * *

_**A/N: Gah! The drama! It's like a soap opera, isn't it xD … meh … anyways, review if you please. **_


	17. Chapter 17

_**A/N: Wow, I can't thank you enough for the 200+ reviews! I'm sincerely thankful for your support. And I'm really happy to hear that you're liking the soap opera xD I tried something new with this chapter and I don't know if you'll like it… Let me know what you thought regardless!**_

**_Ps. I'm reloading this chapter since it seems that FF is being a bitch - some people seem to get a 'chapter not found' message when they click on the emailed link xD ... I hope this sorts it out!_**

_**Warnings: The usual apply**_

_**Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto**_

* * *

_**Chapter 17**_

He's high. And she's so beautiful that it hurts.

Tenten is pacing around his room like a caged tiger, every stride filled with frustration, anger, hurt … and, perversely, he's proud. Proud that he's able to make her feel so intensely. Neji lay silently on his bed watching her pace his room, patiently waiting for her to get to the point of the visit. The drugs make it easy to wait, to watch…

The light catches her hair, making highlights glint gold in the dark tresses. It lights up the planes of her face, making her porcelain skin glow, and his fingers clench involuntarily as he remembers running his hands over the silky smooth skin and through the fall of her hair…

"Is it true?"

Her voice is at odds with her appearance – strident and grating – and Neji flinches away from the sound slightly. He can't help himself. And he wishes that she would just not speak. That she would just stay quiet and continue pacing so he can watch the smooth glide of her legs scissoring and remember what they felt like wrapped around him …

"Neji! Answer me. Is it true? Did you push Sakura out that window?"

The tone is softer but the words … the words bring back a cacophony of confused images and sounds … shattering glass and cracking wood … flashes of pink hair and spreading blood … and anger, hate, venom … the poison from inside finding a tangible outlet in her broken, spread-eagled form … the crashing fear, the realization that he's sorry … but it's too late and the lights are flashing and people are screaming … and he's frozen …

Soft fingertips touch his lips and he's surprised that his mouth is trembling, and Tenten's other hand is combing slowly through his hair and the gesture is comforting – grounding – and so he finds himself again amidst the crunching, blood-stained shards. And it's good to be back – to feel himself taking over. Tenten had gotten inside of him and she took the shielding steel away as if the walls he'd built couldn't withstand the vines of her love. They wrapped around the stone and pushed, and pulled, and prodded until even the strongest had no choice but to crumble and fall … but that's ridiculous and he knows that he's in control. He's always in control. She doesn't own him, can't make him feel anything, and he won't let her make him remember.

Abruptly peace settles on his soul, soothing the turbulent waters and she's still there, still holding him, helping him, and he _knows _he doesn't deserve it – or her but he can't make her stay away … can't make her see him for what he truly is …

Beautiful. Brilliant. Broken.

And he knows, as he always has, that he's not meant for any great thing – someone like him has only one inevitable end. But he's afraid now, afraid of leaving her behind, because what will she do without him? Who will take care of her and make sure she smiles?

The irony hits him like a punch to the gut. He wants nothing more than for Tenten to smile and yet he's the one who took the ability away … took her light, and warmth, and hid it. Buried it in the darkness next to his heart because the terrible truth is that he knows if he doesn't then someone else will …

And then it's just funny. Or maybe not. He's not sure anymore and his head is beginning to ache and he wants to reach for another piece of forgetfulness but she's in the way … and the irony of _that_ makes it all unendurable and he starts to laugh until his stomach muscles clench and he can feel the moisture gathering in the corners of his eyes …

"Neji," Tenten's voice is a whisper this time and she looks worried – maybe a little scared and he's savagely satisfied by that – she _should_ be scared, should be worried. She should be running away from him and this room as far and as fast as she's capable of but, as always, she stays and he shakes his head but the laughter continues to bubble from the pit of his stomach. Or maybe it's tears?

Finally he calms down and his eyes are darker than usual. He can _feel _it.

"Yes, I did," he finally answers – his tone grave because he feels that's what she expects but he can't carry it through and another laugh escapes.

And finally, _finally_, she looks horrified.

She's staring at him as if she's seeing him clearly for the first time, then she's standing, backing away … and through the pain that lances through him he manages to hold on to one clear thought. Manages to voice it in a tone so cold that she won't be able to do anything but believe him.

"I told you – you can't change who I am."

Because the truth was, he didn't want to change.

He doesn't deserve to.

* * *

It's very early the next morning when Neji's eyes flutter open quietly.

The groan that spills from his lips feels as if it's ripping him apart and for a moment he wonders what on earth happened to him but then he remembers and his gaze automatically searches his room.

And she's there – not that he's surprised – but she's cold and remote and her voice barely even trembles when she speaks.

"I think you'll be alright now."

Tenten walked over to sit next to him on the bed and, despite everything, she feels her heart contracting. He'd done an unspeakable thing, but he was still Neji. Or maybe he was Neji because of the unspeakable acts he'd committed but, whatever the reason, deep down she can't deny that, whatever he'd done, his hold on her heart is as strong as ever.

"I need a little bit of a break."

The words are out before Tenten can stop them but now that the boundary had been crossed she decided to forge ahead, "It's just too much right now. There's so much going on and I don't even know where I fit into any of it. I just need to clear my head a little, you know?"

Her gaze is pleading and Neji forgot about his aching body and the emotional turmoil and reacted instinctively – uncharacteristically. Before he even realized he was thinking of it, his fingers are tangled in hers and he breathes one quiet word into the silence.

"Stay."

But her hair flies out around her face as she shakes her head slowly.

"I can't, Neji. Not right now."

So he lets her go, tries to hold on to his pride, though, God knows, he has none where she's concerned and he _hates _it … but she's at the door and the wrath is dying and all that's left is the desolate plains that she's consigning him to.

"Will you come back?"

He cringes at the uncertainty in his tone, the near pleading note, and he tries, so hard, to pull his walls up around him, but then she's turning, a slight smile on her face.

"Of course," though her smile is sad, it's _there_, "Always."

And then she's gone but somehow it's alright and though he's surrounded by rubble and destruction – the only things he really knows and understands – it's okay because she'll come back and drown it all in a soft glow that can make anything beautiful.

* * *

It's as if Tenten never came back into his life. Or rather, it's as if he'd never dragged her back.

There's lights flashing and drinks flowing, and Gaara's handing him something – he's not really sure what – but the red-head is laughing, his thumb and forefinger on Neji's chin, forcing his mouth open, and then Neji swallows because he knows it will help to dull the pain.

_You got your wish after all, Tenten_,he reflects bitterly because she's left him behind, wondering what he'd done wrong. But that's not quite true either – he knows it's not what he's done but who he _is_. Still the part of him that's crying out to her, begging her to believe that he can be better for her, won't entirely remain buried.

It had been two weeks. Two desperate weeks since she'd found out the most terrible of his secrets and though he saw her in the hallways, and she smiled at him, she'd not approached him. Part of him couldn't help but wonder if this was what the end felt like. He didn't know – never before had he been able to understand what those girls he left behind had felt like…

For the millionth time he stilled the devil in his head. The one that whispered persuasively that he'd been right the first time: she wasn't real – she was Sasuke's creature through and through and that they'd succeeded in bringing him to his knees, as they planned.

_No, she's not like that_.

For the first time in his life Hyuuga Neji felt vulnerable and lost and alone – with nothing left to strive for. So he buried himself in his life – in his world – and tried to be thankful that Tenten had escaped this at least.

There are hands pulling at him, trying to get him to his feet, but Neji found that he just didn't care. Couldn't be bothered. Vaguely he's aware of a spiky ponytail, and blonde hair so bright that it seems to shine with a light all its own, but he's sure he's dreaming…

"That's enough, Neji. Come on – let's get you to bed."

And only when they reach the stairs does he realize that he's not dreaming and Shikamaru and Naruto have their arms around him, dragging him up the stairs. And he wonders where he is, and how he got there, but everything's fucked up, so what does it matter?

The mattress is soft, the pillows softer, but it's nothing compared to how Tenten felt and just before blackness encroaches on him, he's aware of her touch. And now he _knows _he's dreaming, so it's okay to smile and brush a kiss across the palm that's stroking his jaw. It's okay to whisper the deepest, darkest desire of his heart because it's only his sub-conscious manifesting his longing.

"Tenten. I missed you."

He's half aware that he'd spoken out loud – could almost hear the slurring of the words – but she's back and she's kissing his forehead softly and so he allows the darkness to swallow him whole.

* * *

"Thank you," Tenten said softly to Naruto, Shikamaru and Temari as they hovered uncertainly by the door.

Shikamaru shrugged and shot a look at his girlfriend before replying, "Sorry. I know you guys haven't really sorted anything out yet but … he was asking for you." The uncomfortable look on his face wouldn't fade and Tenten smiled slightly as she watched Temari giving his hand a reassuring squeeze.

"I don't think he's been sober much the last few weeks," Naruto commented in an unusually subdued tone. "He's been with Gaara a lot and they just seemed to get high more and more so …"

"It's okay. I'm glad you called me," Tenten reassured them again, determinedly looking anywhere but at Neji – if she did she might cry.

She'd been with Temari – studying – when her phone had rung and to her intense surprise it had been her friend's boyfriend on the line. He'd cryptically told her that Neji needed her, and despite her firmest intentions to avoid him until she'd sorted out how she felt and where she fit, Tenten had gone immediately. She couldn't have done anything different.

The other three left and she turned her attention back to the sleeping Neji. She'd been shocked to see him. To a certain degree she'd expected to feel pity – maybe even guilt – something about Shikamaru's tone of voice had alerted her to Neji's state but he'd surprised her again. There was nothing piteous about Neji in this state.

He was lost, confused, crumbling, but it only made her want to save him all the more. She just didn't know how.

Tenten sighed. Sasuke had, thankfully, left her alone on her arrival at the mansion and, to her intense surprise, Sakura had immediately rushed over to tell her to take Neji to an empty guest bedroom – and to say that they wouldn't be disturbed. At that point the pink-haired girl had shot such a look of malice at the younger Uchiha that Tenten couldn't help but wonder what had happened between them. But the thought had been shelved quickly when she'd seen Neji …

She still hadn't mentioned to anyone that she knew about Neji's past – and she'd been surprised to note that though Sakura and Neji avoided contact with each other wherever they could they didn't seem to be on bad terms with each other. Her head whirled just thinking about it all.

Though she had Sakura's assurance Tenten had learned the hard way not to trust the word of an Uchiha so she slowly disentangled herself from Neji and walked to the door. The lock clicked satisfyingly into place and she stared at Neji for a moment before rejoining him on the bed.

It was going to be a long night.

* * *

Sasuke slammed his empty glass down onto the bar more viciously than he'd intended but he ignored the startled looks and merely motioned for someone to hand him the bottle of Scotch.

A tentative touch at his elbow drew his attention and Sasuke turned his head slightly until he could make out the pink hair and the red dress.

"Thank you," Sakura said quietly.

Sasuke merely nodded, hoping that she would go away but she stood her ground and inwardly he marveled again at the steel that ran through her. Earlier that evening she'd caught him by surprise when she'd marched over to him and announced in a hard voice that Shikamaru was calling Tenten because Neji needed help and that they were going to spend the night in one of his guest rooms undisturbed. She'd glared at him so fiercely and he'd been so surprised that he'd agreed almost without thought. Now she was _thanking _him?

"See, now that amazes me, how after everything you still try to protect him," Sasuke spoke softly but he knew she could hear him.

"We've all made mistakes, Sasuke," her voice trembled slightly, "but that doesn't mean that we shouldn't get a second chance. Whatever Neji's done he doesn't deserve this."

She turned and left in a swish of silk and Sasuke abandoned his glass, picking the bottle up and drinking straight from the neck instead.

* * *

_**A/N: Poor Neji. Well, everyone has their breaking point – even a Hyuuga – and I hope that I managed to convey that. We've seen hints of this coming in earlier chapters, or well, I don't know if I did it right but that's how it was supposed to have been! He's confused and he's scared because of his feelings for Tenten and what Sasuke might do, he's never really gotten over his past (which we'll still delve into don't worry!) so the guilt and all the other bad emotions he'd locked away started to seep back with his confession to Tenten. I know that this chapter seems abrupt – Neji's fall seems very sudden – but it's not really. Not if you look at it like that. And, since this chapter was from Neji's POV mostly, we don't really have a clear idea of the bigger picture yet. That's next chapter ^ ^ Anyways … please let me know what you thought – remember reviews are my crack =D**_


	18. Chapter 18

_**A/N: Hmm … I think Neji and Sasuke are OOC in this chapter, and I'm sorry for that xD Let me know what you thought!**_

_**Warnings: Drug and alcohol abuse and some limeish-ness as well as language**_

_**Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto  
**_

* * *

_**Chapter 18**_

"_There's something you might find interesting going on upstairs." _

_The malicious tone of the red-head's voice wasn't lost on Sasuke and he sighed as he turned to face Karin. Her features were twisted, like she enjoyed it, whatever it was, but Sasuke only spared her an impatient glance before turning back to the brunette he'd been focused on._

_Distractedly he reflected that Karin might not have been the best choice he'd ever made. She just would not let go – couldn't seem to get that a one-night stand was exactly that: for one night only. Guilt nipped at his soul again as he relived the hours he'd spent in bed with the red-head. She'd been a nice change of pace… Sakura, though he loved her, was not the kind of girl you fucked senseless. He always found himself taking special care of Sakura – making love to her – and though her moans were more than satisfying he just couldn't seem to bring himself to slam into her until she screamed his name – no matter how badly he wanted to._

_But with Karin he'd found an outlet for the wildness that Sakura inevitably excited and that he never acted upon. He'd woken the next morning, completely satisfied, but uncomfortably aware of the fact that, despite his inward protestations of love for his pink-haired girlfriend, he'd cheated on her – had slept with another girl with no thought of Sakura whatsoever. But the guilt hadn't lasted long – and it hadn't deterred him from doing it again – though with a different girl each time. _

_The guilt _had_ driven him into ignoring the red-head. He wasn't stupid, he knew that she'd seen their night as the start of something, knew that she expected him to break up with Sakura. Since then he'd been very careful to make sure that his partners knew the score. But he hadn't left Sakura, of course he hadn't … fifteen-year-old Uchiha Sasuke found that, pleasurable as it was to experiment with other girls, he returned to Sakura time and time again. Briefly, he wondered if the pink-haired girl knew about his many indiscretions – if she did she either didn't care or she was exceptionally good at hiding how she felt about it._

_A light laugh from Karin drew his attention again and the brunette next to him grimaced, shifting in her seat … and Sasuke knew that Karin had just ruined any chance he might've had – as she planned, no doubt. He glared wearily up at Karin, ignoring the vague unease when her smirk didn't falter. Inwardly Sasuke cursed Neji fluently. He'd been sure that Neji would be able to keep Karin off his back – she'd certainly seemed to enjoy his attentions the previous week. But his long-haired friend was nowhere to be seen. Ever since Neji had started joining him at these parties Sasuke was continually surprised by the other boy – surprised at the darkness that Neji had in him. He partied far harder than Sasuke did…_

_Sasuke sighed again, and slowly unwound his frame from the couch he'd been reclining on. Another glare was sent at the red-head but he figured that if he went with her then she'd leave him alone. Or so he hoped. She giggled softly, and grabbed his hand to lead him from the room but Sasuke quickly pulled his hand out of her grasp. The walk through the crowded room and up the darkened stairs seemed interminable to Sasuke but he gritted his teeth as he followed in Karin's wake. Finally they drew to a halt in front of a door on the third floor of the Uchiha mansion. A guestroom that was rarely used … in fact Sasuke couldn't even recall the last time anyone had been up here. _

_The door was slightly ajar and through the thin wood Sasuke could hear panted breaths, soft moans, and the sound of wet mouths and he frowned down at Karin. If this was her way of trying to get him worked up then she was sadly mistaken…_

"_N-Neji…" _

_A soft groan made Sasuke's head jerk up – he had no desire to catch his friend in action but there was something disturbingly familiar about that breathy tone – that soft groan so completely saturated in sex. Karin stifled another giggle behind her hand and turned slightly to shoot him a look filled with malicious merriment before she backed slowly down the hall. She paused at the head of the stairs, leaning seductively back against the railings and motioned for him to open the door._

_Sasuke shook his head in confusion – the dread pooling low in his stomach told him, quite eloquently, that he did not want to see what lay behind that door. But he found his hand slowly rising to push the door open slightly. His heart pounded in his chest and his stomach churned uncomfortably, the alcohol he'd consumed washing through his veins sluggishly. _

_He raised his eyes slowly - they'd already adjusted to the dark during his ascent up the stairs. The moon was out and the blinds in the room were drawn so the silvery light pooled inside, helping his vision along. The world lurched, his stomach heaved, and Sasuke was thankful that he managed to keep control – that he didn't throw up or stagger away drunkenly as his body demanded. Karin's presence a short way down the hall ensured that he couldn't break down, couldn't give in to the emotions swirling through him…_

_A bed stood in the middle of the disused room, the moonlight falling directly onto it as if it had been strategically placed. Sakura – his Sakura – reclined back onto the white sheets, completely naked, her upper body braced on her elbows, her hands and forearms flat on the bed – and Sasuke could clearly see the way her fists clenched into the sheets. A light sheen of sweat covered her body as she threw her head back and Sasuke's gaze left her shadowy features to focus on Neji – his supposed _friend_ Neji._

_Neji knelt on the floor, Sakura's legs hooked over his shoulders – fully clothed for some odd reason that Sasuke couldn't even begin to fathom – lapping slowly at her folds as he stared up at the flushed girl writhing under the touch of his tongue._

"_F-faster…" she panted, her head falling back again, as her thighs tightened around his head and, before he had to witness Neji complying with the breathless command, Sasuke whirled and strode down the hallway to where Karin waited._

_She smirked at him and Sasuke was glad for the semi-darkness that hid his shell-shocked features from view. In the back of his mind a small voice – quickly silenced – whispered that he was being hypocritical in feeling betrayed. Hadn't he done the same thing to Sakura? _

_But he'd never done it with her friends – and maybe that was what hurt worst of all. Not the fact that they would do something like this to him, but the fact that they did it with each other._

"_Told you you'd find it interesting," Karin whispered smugly. And Sasuke reacted without thought, gave in to the enraged pain that ripped through his body. _

_Grabbing the red-headed girl by the arm he pulled her violently away from the railings of the staircase and slammed her into the wall on the opposite side of the hallway. She gasped but before she could utter even one word – if she did speak Sasuke was afraid that he might not be able to hold the violence at bay – he pushed his body against hers. She arched into him and he lifted her quickly so she could wrap her legs around his waist. Her hands buried in his hair and he tightened his grip on her hips to bruising point._

_Another breathless moment passed and, just before their lips met, Sasuke whispered, "Never speak of this. Ever."_

_He rocked his hips against her when she only stared at his mouth and her head fell back, a moan leaving her lips, "Y-yes," she agreed shakily, pulling his head down, and when their lips connected Sasuke firmly closed the door on memories of Sakura and happiness. She hadn't deserved his love, after all._

* * *

Sharp light was stabbing at his eyes like a thousand knives and Neji moaned as he rolled over onto his stomach to bury his face in the pillows beneath his head. His body protested and he groaned into the pillow as the awareness of his body's silent complaint washed through his brain. He felt as if he'd been run over by a truck – twice.

Wearily he reflected that the night must've been worse than any he'd had in recent memory if he felt like this. He'd grown so used to crashing while hung-over that he barely even noticed the withdrawal his body experienced anymore. He frowned, his eyes closed, as he tried to pin-point what had made the previous night different. And jerked in shock when he found that he couldn't remember. He slowly cracked one eye open – and breathed a silent sigh of relief when he noticed the familiar landmarks of one of the Uchiha's guestrooms. At least he now knew where he was.

Slowly some memory started to filter back – or maybe it was a dream? Neji could vaguely recall that he'd imagined Tenten's touch just before he'd passed out, and the resulting wave of loneliness that washed over him completely drowned out the miserable way he felt physically. Suddenly all he wanted was a drink … and then another … and another … until it all just went away and he no longer had the mental capacity to even remember Tenten's name.

He sighed and rolled over onto his back – restless despite his discomfort – and he froze when he felt the heat of another body in the bed next to him. Frantically he'd wondered what he'd done – who he'd slept with – but all the strain drained from his body when he slowly turned his head to see Tenten sleeping quietly. There were dark circles under her eyes, as if she hadn't been sleeping well, and Neji firmly tried to ignore the pang that shot through him – what if she was cutting again? He shook his head, but couldn't help but stare intently at her, thankfully bandage free, wrists.

Suddenly the light wasn't garish, his body wasn't complaining and his emotions were firmly under control. She was here. And had been all through the night by the looks of it. She'd stayed with him, had come to him, and abruptly Neji admitted the truth to himself. A truth he'd been denying for the past two weeks.

He'd wanted her to come. The wild ride he'd been on hadn't been so much a way to drown out the pain and the doubts as it had been a desperate cry for her to come back to him. Neji winced. God, how much more pathetic could he be? She was slowly turning him into exactly the kind of person he'd never wanted to become. He'd never wanted to be as dependent on someone as his parents had been on each other. If it hadn't been for him, he was sure his mother would've succumbed to death not too long after his father …

Another groan escaped when he shook his head, trying to dislodge the bitter thoughts. His body wasn't up to any kind of sudden movement and abruptly Neji was just so tired. Tired of his life, and everyone in it. He sank back into the pillows, an arm over his eyes, and hoped that sleep would take him again. A deep sleep – the kind he'd never wake up from, preferably. His dreams were the only place he could just _be_ – the only safe haven for him and Tenten …

Tenten sighed, stirred, and stretched slightly as she opened her eyes. Neji watched her warily from under the shielding arm, sure that this time he'd pushed it too far. This time she wouldn't smile … but to his intense surprise she did smile. Slowly, softly, the gesture sleepy and, much as he hated to admit, he found it adorable.

"I know you're awake, Neji. I can see your eyes are open," she murmured, turning onto her back and stretching languidly again. Slowly Neji dropped his arm, still waiting for the inevitable confrontation, but completely wrong-footed by the amusement that laced her tone. She sighed and, stretching complete, snuggled closer, her head fitting perfectly into the hollow of his neck and shoulder. He couldn't help it – knew he should be pulling away – but he wrapped an arm around her pulling her closer and allowed her warming presence to soothe the inner turmoil.

Finally Neji decided to break the silence – he had to know what this meant.

"You stayed?" he asked slowly.

Tenten sighed and shifted so she could look up into his face, "Shika called me," she admitted softly. She turned slowly onto her stomach, one hand tracing nervous patterns on his chest, and she kept her gaze averted when she continued.

"You have to stop this, Neji. What if Shika and Naruto hadn't stopped you? Would you just have gone on until you killed yourself?"

Her tone was gentle, but the words were accusatory and Neji could feel his expression hardening. He pulled away from her, his voice cold when he replied, "Trying to change me, Tenten? I warned you."

She sighed again but instead of moving away, as Neji had planned, she rolled closer, until she was cuddled up against his back, her arms snaking around his waist from behind as she nestled her cheek into the curve of his neck.

"No," she whispered softly into his ear, "I'm not trying to change you – you're right: you did warn me. But I am saying that if you want this – with us – to work, then you're going to have to start trying to change yourself. I won't stand by and watch you slowly destroying yourself. I love you too much for that."

She sat up and slowly stroked his hair behind his ear, out of his eyes. Neji stared straight ahead stonily.

"I'm here, Neji. I came back. That alone should tell you that I mean it – I won't try to change you. But I won't watch over you every time you go on a binge. I won't enable you like that and eventually the strain will become too much for us," her tone turned pleading, "you know I'm right. So, I'm begging you, _please_, stop doing this to yourself. You've gone far beyond social highs and you know it. Do you even know what you and Gaara were taking? Did it ever occur to you that you could've died?"

Her voice rose in frustration and the anger boiling in the pit of his stomach got the better of Neji. He turned swiftly to glare at Tenten over his shoulder, "And whose fault would that have been?" he asked sarcastically.

Tenten froze, "Don't do that. Don't blame me for your problems. Believe me, I've been where you are right now – I blamed you, told myself that if only you hadn't done or said something I would never have gotten high or drunk or whatever – but I learned the hard way: you, and only you, are responsible for your actions. If I made you feel like you wanted to forget then that's fine but I never forced you to take anything. You chose to do that, Neji."

She swung her legs off the bed, her back turned to him as she searched for her shoes on the floor and Neji could tell by the stiff way she held herself that he'd pushed her too far.

He slowly reached out and touched her hair, playing with the ends, gratified when she froze again. But she didn't speak and Neji grimaced inwardly at the fact that she was making him say it.

"I'm sorry," he said in a low voice, "that was unnecessary."

She relaxed slightly but continued searching for her shoes, and once she had them on, she turned back to him. Sadness glimmered in her eyes – they were shining with suppressed tears and Neji winced again at the guilt that pulled at his soul.

"Please, Neji. Stop." Her voice trembled and Neji could feel himself weaken, the words pulling inexorably at him until he found himself capitulating – giving her what she wanted because he couldn't do anything else.

"I'll try." Even to him, the words sounded insincere – forced – but he meant it… for her he would try.

Tenten smiled tremulously at him, taking his hand and playing with his fingers, and firmly tried to ignore the tug of guilt. She hated deceiving him – hated nagging at him like this – but through the long night she'd come to the conclusion that the only way to be safe from Sasuke was to stop giving him dirt to use as blackmail material. Though she'd spoken nothing but the truth it was her motivations that were causing her to have trouble meeting Neji's eye but she reminded herself that, either way, whatever her motivations, it kept Neji safe and that was all that mattered. Even if he resented her a little that was preferable to death or prison.

* * *

Sasuke glanced up briefly at the sound of footsteps in the hall but returned to reading the back of the cereal box when he caught a flash of long, brown hair disappearing around the corner. He nearly choked on the next bite when Neji appeared in the kitchen doorway.

The pale eyes met his own and he read the hesitancy there – the unwillingness to show any weakness to Sasuke – and the Uchiha couldn't help himself: he smirked in satisfaction, watching as the Hyuuga bristled with suppressed anger.

Silence reigned and Sasuke's smirk widened as he leaned back in his chair. His spoon clattered loudly against the porcelain of the bowl and Sasuke waited until the sound faded before he spoke.

"So, interesting night. Who would've been able to predict we'd be entertained by the high-and-mighty-Hyuuga-Neji being so very out of control."

Each word slipped past his lips with a satisfied sound and Neji clenched his fists.

"Why Tenten, Uchiha? What's she ever done to you? It's me you've got a problem with – leave her out of it." Neji forced the words through clenched teeth.

"Ah. Yes. Precious, little Tenten," the amusement faded from Sasuke's tone, his voice hardening as he continued, "You're a difficult person to get to, Hyuuga. Why on earth would I _not _use your Achilles' heel?"

Neji ran an agitated hand through his hair and Sasuke was surprised when the Hyuuga didn't argue with his assessment, only spoke in a low tone.

"Leave her alone, alright? You're not going to get to me through her."

Sasuke leaned forward, watching Neji's face intently, he wanted to witness every second of this reaction, "I think I've already gotten to you through her – it must've stung to watch her with me."

His eyes narrowed and, as Neji watched the Uchiha warily, he could feel his fists clenching involuntarily – flashes of Tenten on her knees in front of Sasuke flitting through his mind. "I don't know what you mean," he finally replied evenly and turned to go. He had no idea what he'd been thinking – as if Sasuke would ever back down merely because Neji told him to … no, Neji knew better than that.

"I think you know exactly what I'm talking about, Hyuuga," Sasuke's voice called after him but Neji refused to stop and listen to this.

"I think you can't help but remember how she got down on her knees for me…" Sasuke let the sentence trail away suggestively and Neji froze in the doorway.

He turned slowly, meeting the obsidian gaze with a calculating one of his own, "You knew I was there – knew I was outside the door…"

Sasuke inclined his head smugly, "Was it fun, Hyuuga? Did you enjoy seeing innocent, little Tenten with my-"

"Stop."

Neji's voice was low, dangerous, and Sasuke couldn't help the thrill of anticipation running through him – how long had he waited for the Hyuuga to snap, how long had he waited for the fists to start flying … deep down he'd always known that there was only one way to exorcise the malevolent feelings between them, had always know that violence was the only way to feel better.

Already anticipating the bloodshed to come Sasuke couldn't resist goading him a little further, couldn't help but enjoy the way the Hyuuga's knuckles turned white as he clenched his hand around the doorframe.

"Did I hit a nerve? Maybe she never did that for you," Sasuke said musingly, satisfaction running rampant through his veins at the way Neji's hand began to tremble with suppressed violence.

"It reminds me of something," Sasuke's voice changed, amusement faded from it, it became as hard and cold as its owner felt at the moment and his dark eyes glittered as they focused on the tense back of his opponent.

"It reminds me of the time that _I_ spent hiding behind a door – watching you and Sakura."

Finally, after all the years, the words were out into the open, and Sasuke couldn't help the relief that flowed through him as if he'd released something poisonous from within him. He watched with detached curiosity as the Hyuuga froze.

"I thought Sakura told you," Neji responded at last, his voice slightly hoarse, "I thought that's how you found out. You dumped her for Karin and she tried to get back at you by telling you about that."

A low, mirthless laugh ripped from Sasuke's chest, "No. I set it up to look that way, yes, but that's not how it happened. I loved her. I cheated on her but I was naive and stupid and it never occurred to me that you'd take advantage of that. Luckily I found out before it could become public knowledge and so I made it seem as if I left Sakura for Karin. But I knew, Hyuuga. I saw you together. I watched as you tongue-fucked my girlfriend and I decided that one day you would know what that felt like. Only, I took if further. Simply witnessing her allowing me to touch her means nothing, not in the world we live in – half the time everyone's so drunk or high they don't care who does what to them, but to have to watch her deliberately choosing to please me …"

Sasuke found that, by the end of his tirade, his voice had turned emotionless. For so long he'd imagined the satisfaction he'd feel at this moment only to be let down by the distinct emptiness... suddenly he was just very tired. Silence descended and Sasuke sank back down into his chair, listlessly picked up his spoon and deliberately ignored the Hyuuga as he forced himself to eat.

"Sasuke. I was naive and stupid too."

He froze spoon halfway to his mouth – he couldn't remember the last time Neji had called him by his name, nor could he remember ever hearing so much repressed regret in the normally stoic Hyuuga's voice. He forced his limbs to thaw and went back to eating his cereal, studiously studying each piece of food before he placed it in his mouth. He ignored the other boy until he heard the footsteps receding down the hallway and the sound of the front door slamming. Only then did he allow himself to drop his spoon, and rush to the sink. His body heaved, and Sasuke coughed through the bile that rose unrelentingly, only half aware of his surroundings. His mind was focused on the past…

* * *

_**A/N: Review if you please *makes puppy eyes***_


	19. Chapter 19

_**A/N: Still on schedule – I'm so impressed with myself ^^ Thank you so much to everyone who read/reviewed/alerted/favorited – you have no idea how much I appreciate your feedback. A special thank you to the repeated reviewers – you guys rock ^^ Anyways, I've included a section in this chapter that was supposed to go in the previous one, but I cut it because I thought it was boring. However that led to some confusion regarding Tenten's character so … meh, you've now got the dubious pleasure of experiencing that section xD Please let me know what you thought of this chapter – I'm quite nervous about it ^^"**_

_**Warnings: Drug and alcohol abuse and some language**_

_**Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto (and I don't think I want to – anyone else depressed by the developments in this week's manga chapter? Seriously, there is no way this is going to end well *sigh*)**___

* * *

_**Chapter 19**_

Knuckles clenched white around the stainless steel of the kitchen sink as Sasuke fought for control over his mind and his stomach. Another racking cough shook his body as he tried to force the memories and nausea away. His head was whirling, almost as if he was high, and wryly Sasuke reflected that, if this was his body's reaction to the overload of emotion, he was glad that he did not allow himself to feel very often…

_... "Stop deluding yourself, Uchiha. If she's a whore, it's because you made her so."_

_Sasuke's eyes narrowed. He could feel the rage boiling in his gut. Fiery tongues of it licking at his veins. Never before had he wanted to hit someone as badly as he wanted to hit Hyuuga Neji in that moment. He wanted, so much, to wipe that self-righteous smirk off the other's face …_

"_She still deserved better than that," he finally managed from between gritted teeth._

_Neji laughed – low and deep and the sound was filled with bitterness, more of a reflex action than an expression of amusement._

"_Like you, you mean? What the fuck, Sasuke? How long has it been since you've even pretended to be faithful? You couldn't even manage to stay with one girl for the entire duration of the six month relationship and everyone knows it. You'll fuck anything that stands still long enough – and you really _were _delusional if you thought Sakura didn't know about it. So why's it okay for you but not for her?" _

_Neji shrugged as if it was of no great moment and Sasuke could feel the fire blazing into an inferno. The drugs weren't helping his control and, for a moment, he imagined his eyes bleeding red, fire shooting from them to envelop the still smirking Hyuuga in a black conflagration. _

"_I never fucked her friends. How the hell can you even begin to think that was okay, Neji?"_

_A sneer pulled at the lines of Neji's lips and abruptly Sasuke hated him. Hated him more than he'd ever thought it possible to hate anyone or anything. Hated every perfect hair on his fucked-up head…_

"_What? I should say no to a willing girl because I hang out with her boyfriend? Please. Spare me, Uchiha. And, correct me if I'm wrong, but what do you care? You dumped her for that weird red-head weeks ago." _

"_It's the principle of the matter," Sasuke ground out._

_Neji's eyebrows rose, "You're one to talk about principles."_

_Suddenly a flash of pink clashed against the red haze that hovered over Sasuke's field of vision. _

"_Guys, please." _

_Sakura laid a hand on Neji's arm and tried to pull him toward the stairs but the Hyuuga shrugged out of her grasp as if she was nothing more than a mild annoyance, and Sasuke could almost feel the black flames of hatred again._

"_Stay the fuck out of it, Sakura," he snarled in her general direction, barely even aware of her flinch through his anger._

"_Sasuke, you're drunk and you're high and Neji's in no better condition. Everyone's talking about it downstairs. Listen, they've turned the music off. Just let it go for now. Please?" she turned that pleading green gaze on him – the one he'd never been able to resist very well, and Sasuke could feel some of the unthinking rage evaporating. Suddenly he was aware of the lack of pounding music, the slow susurration of many voices engaged in speculation._

_A long, electrically charged moment passed as the two boys continued to glare at each other over Sakura positioned between them - a hand on each of their chests. _

"_Please, Sasuke," her voice whispered over his senses, and Sasuke stepped back abruptly, shaking his dark bangs out of his face. Sakura breathed an audible sigh of relief and lowered her arms, but Neji wasn't done yet. He laughed again, that cold, cruel sound that he was so adept at using._

"_Scared, Uchiha?" _

_The taunt fell easily from the Hyuuga's lips and inwardly Sasuke marveled again at the darkness he saw in the other's eyes – the anger that formed an almost constant, near-tangible, aura around the long-haired boy._

"_You're going to talk to me about being scared, Hyuuga?" An incredulous laugh bubbled from Sasuke's gut and, just like that, the anger was back - burning brighter than ever. "This from the guy who sat back and let his mother die because he was too fucking scared to try to do anything about it! Or was it actually that her death suited you?"_

_Dead silence fell as his last words rang in the air between them. Sasuke bit his lower lip briefly, vaguely aware that he'd crossed a line but reasoning that Neji had crossed it first. Most of his attention was focused on the Hyuuga only a few meters away. Rage practically dripped off Neji – his body was nearly vibrating with the emotions he was trying to suppress._

"_I forgive you for that, _once_," Neji finally said in a low, dangerous voice that told Sasuke, very clearly, that any hope of salvaging their friendship had been destroyed by his rash words. I don't care, he told himself defiantly and smirked at the Hyuuga._

"_Can't deal with the truth, can you?" _

_Inside he was screaming at himself to stop but he found that the words tripped off his tongue with no input from hi s mind at all._

"_You forget, Hyuuga, whoever you present to these people, I know the real you."_

_Everything seemed to happen simultaneously. Neji lunged at Sasuke, fist flying toward the Uchiha's face, and Sasuke ducked the blow. Sakura jumped forward, between them again, and tried to push Neji away. Sasuke – his sense of balance upset by the drugs and alcohol – stumbled and fell back against the wall. His head connected with the hard bricks and, dazedly, Sasuke thanked his lucky stars that he hadn't gone through the narrow picture window that framed the French doors leading to the small balcony. _

_The hallway was ridiculously narrow, and despite Sakura's best efforts she was no real match for Neji's strength. Sasuke scrambled, looking for secure footing before the Hyuuga was on top of him, aware that Sakura would be pushed aside at any second. He'd only managed to get one knee under him when an enraged shout drew his attention back to the struggling pair._

"_Get the fuck off, Sakura!" Neji yelled in frustration, and grabbed her shoulders before shoving her violently away from him. _

_Sasuke traced the curve of her fall with that same curious detachment he'd fallen victim to moments ago. Watched as she flew through the air gracefully, inwardly marveling at the force of the push she'd received. He watched as her heel caught on the throw-rug that lay on the floor, saw her skidding across the narrow space…_

_Too late he realized that her trajectory would take her right through the window on the other side of the door. He could feel his eyes widening in shock, could hear every gasp of horror from the people that now lined the stairs, having been drawn by the lure of violence and bloodshed. _

_He lunged across, his hand outstretched, trying to catch hold of any part of her that he could but he was too late. Always too late. Still kneeling on the wooden floor Sasuke could vaguely hear a voice screaming her name and realized that it was his own but it was drowned out by the crash of Sakura's body hitting the thin glass of the window. He'd always told Itachi that they should get these windows replaced – they were more for show and decoration than actual protection from the elements. The glass was so thin that a bad thunderstorm had once resulted in the glass shattering. Light though Sakura was she was still too heavy for the thin layer of blown glass that filled the panes._

_Her back crashed into the window and it cracked, slowly at first but, a millisecond later, it had exploded into a million tiny shards, slicing at her fair skin. Thin ribbons of blood appeared on the soft surface faster than Sasuke could believe possible. He stared into her terrified green eyes and for the first time felt real regret. Something indefinable flashed through her gaze and then she'd disappeared from view. Seconds - it felt like hours - later there was a soft thwump of her body hitting the grass three stories below and an earsplitting scream of pain before silence descended._

_Slowly, in shock, Sasuke turned his head to Neji. The long-haired boy stood frozen in place, all rage gone from his face and his demeanor. Horror painted his features as he slowly swiveled his head to meet Sasuke's dark gaze._

"_What have you done?" _

_The Uchiha's soft whisper cut through the silence like a knife and, as if it was the cue they'd been waiting for, there was a sudden stampede of footsteps, screams and shouts echoing in their wake, as the people who'd lined the stairs moments before ran for the exits. But, throughout the frenetic movement, Neji and Sasuke remained rooted in place._

* * *

"How did it go?"

The understanding in the doctor's eyes made guilt flare uncomfortably in Tenten's gut and she averted her eyes, choosing to remain silent until she had the emotion under control. No matter how often she reassured herself that she'd done the right thing in omitting some details from her discussions with the psychologist, she could never quite help but feel like a liar and a cheat. Still, aside from withholding names, and not mentioning drugs at all, Tenten had been completely truthful in these sessions and the thought acted as a balm for the guilt.

"Tenten? Do you want to talk about it?"

The soft gray eyes were probing and, though the words had been framed as a request, Tenten knew, having come this far, having built the trust between them to this point, there was no way she could _not_ answer.

"He's okay," she finally replied reluctantly, "he said he would try."

A slight frown between those finely drawn brows and Tenten nearly winced before she caught herself.

The doctor leaned back in her chair, steepling her fingers under her chin thoughtfully.

"It doesn't sound like you really believe him."

Tenten sighed. Why would the woman never give her a straight opinion? It was beyond frustrating. The still-sane half of her mind argued that she wasn't there to hear the doctor's opinion – that she wasn't there to get permission or approval for her actions but that she was there to learn to be able to make wise decisions that she believed in – on her own. Deep down she knew that she'd been very carefully led to the point where she could see exactly how destructive Neji's behavior was. Not only for himself but to her as well. Still, no matter how much she believed that she was doing the right thing – that Neji had to change for them to ever have a chance – the persistent fear that he would leave rather than give in to her demands wouldn't fade. And that was the real problem. Fear.

Another deep breath and Tenten repeated her mantra. _I am a responsible, sensible adult. I believe in my decisions and I have to do what is best for me._

"I guess I don't really think he'll change. He'll try, I'm sure. But maybe only in a very half-hearted way." Tenten shrugged, "I told him – like we talked about before – I explained that he has to change on his own, that he has to take responsibility for his own problems or else this relationship is going nowhere…" her voice trailed away.

"That's fine, Tenten. You did well. Give him some time. Alcoholism isn't something that can be beaten overnight."

Tenten gritted her teeth to keep from wincing. _So many lies_, she thought tiredly but nodded in response anyway. Lies or not, the sessions had been the only thing keeping her sane, the only way she'd been able to sort through the muddled feelings Neji incited and the only way she knew to keep a hold of herself. Loving Neji came at a price but the one thing Tenten found she wasn't willing to give up was her sense of self.

She squared her shoulders and forced a smile, "You're right. He obviously needs some time to think it through on his own."

* * *

"_Neji." _

_His father's voice was low, warm, filled with emotions that nine-year-old Hyuuga Neji couldn't even begin to explain._

"_You have to live on." _

_A hand reached out and ruffled the boy's long, silky locks - worn that way in imitation of the father he idolized. Neji stared up at Hizashi in confusion, not sure what was expected of him. Should he answer? If so, what should he say? He didn't understand his father's enigmatic behavior of the past few weeks at all. All he knew was that his mother had been ill – very ill – and when his parents had returned from the doctor's office his father had been a changed man. _

_There had been an almost desperate light shining from within Hyuuga Hizashi but, by contrast, his mother had seemed resigned, calm and patient. Late at night, after he'd been sent to bed, Neji could still hear them talking through the thin walls. Then his father had disappeared. One morning Neji had gone down for breakfast to find his mother, pale, wan and drawn, serving him his usual bowl of cereal, his father's place at the head of the rickety, wooden table conspicuously empty. His mother had assured him that his father would be back soon – that he'd simply gone on a short trip and, indeed, a week later his father had returned. Only instead of the near-manic energy, his father had now been sunk in gloom – seemingly as defeated and resigned as his mother._

_Neji shook his head rebelliously. He was tired of being kept in the dark, tired of all the tension in their small home. Though they'd never been rich, their household had abounded with warmth – his father's occasional bouts of stormy glares cancelled out by his mother's sunny nature and Neji couldn't understand the sudden change in atmosphere. Or maybe he didn't want to. Neji wasn't stupid – sub-consciously he was well aware that his mother was very ill and that the situation was grim. He suppressed the understanding because he didn't want to know – didn't want to realize that all might not be well in the end. But he knew, knew what it meant, and understood all too well what his father's strange behavior and his mother's lethargy was all about._

_On some level. A level he refused to acknowledge._

"_What do you mean?" he called after his father's retreating back, sulkiness in every syllable._

_His father paused in the doorway, turned slightly and gave Neji a small, sad smile over his shoulder. A smile so fleeting Neji wondered if he'd imagined it._

"_Take care of your mother for me, Neji."_

_And then his father vanished around the corner..._

Neji jerked awake. For a moment he stared around his bedroom with disoriented eyes. He was still firmly rooted in the past – didn't see the off-white walls, the classic wooden furniture that made up his sanctuary. He sank back onto his pillows, aware now of the cold sweat that had broken out all over his body. A trembling breath huffed past his lips and he pushed his hair away from his forehead.

Suddenly he was firmly back in the present. In his darkened bedroom, twisted up in his sheets. It was constraining, constricting, and he struggled to draw enough breath into his lungs. He lay there, panting, for a long time. The past didn't want to recede, didn't want to let up on its hold of his mind, and images from the past blended with ones from the present in a confusing flash of shapes and color.

He took a deep breath, and tried to gain control, told himself firmly that it had only been a dream and that he was just experiencing a bit of withdrawal – nothing he hadn't coped with before … but the iron band around his chest tightened and with a gasp Neji fought his way free from the bedclothes. He stumbled across the room, to throw the window open wide and stuck his head out, taking grateful gulps of the fresh air.

At last he could breathe normally again and he sank down to the floor, his back resting against the cool wall, his head cushioned on the window-sill.

_I'm sorry … I didn't take care of her like you wanted …_

He leaned his head back and shut his eyes, firmly ignoring the wetness that welled up behind the closed lids. Years of experience had taught him exactly how to deal with the pain and the guilt and, almost without thought, he pulled himself to his feet and crossed the room to the dresser against the far wall. The drawer slid open soundlessly and the white powder glowed with the promise of oblivion through the darkness. Tenten's pleading eyes popped into his mind, her whispered words… she was right, of course she was right … he had to stop if he didn't want to lose her… but then, he'd never really had her to begin with. How could he ever have thought that he could be the person she deserved to have? Suddenly it all made sense … he couldn't be that person for her… after everything he'd done, all the damage he'd caused… no one who loved Hyuuga Neji emerged from the experience in one piece… he tainted – destroyed – everything he touched and the thought of that happening to Tenten drove his endurance over the edge.

_I'm sorry, Ten … you should have expected that I would let you down …_

Neji reached for the package and slid the drawer closed with a decisive movement.

* * *

_**A/N: Erm … *coughs* *nervous grin* Review?**_


	20. Chapter 20

_**A/N: Meh, a week late … but if you take a look at the chapter length the delay in updating should make perfect sense ^^ I hope that you'll enjoy it and please review and let me know what you thought!**_

_**Warnings: Drug and alcohol abuse and some mild lime-ishness**_

_**Disclaimer: All things Naruto are copyrighted by Kishi-sama … but a girl can dream …**_

* * *

_**Chapter 20**_

Neji wound his way through the students crowded in the hallways. Everywhere was the sound of laughter, voices raised in high spirits – it was Friday after all. Always a cause for rejoicing. But Neji found himself curiously detached from the general air of merriment. The final bell had rung minutes before and two days of uninterrupted Tenten and relaxation stretched temptingly ahead of him, so why couldn't he relax?

A slight frown drew tiny lines between his brows as he reflected on the cause of his tension. Uchiha had been far too quiet as of late. After their confrontation Neji had, naturally, expected the other to come out with figurative guns blazing. Instead … nothing. Not a word, not a gesture, not even a goddamned note. Sasuke had also left Tenten strictly alone – and though _that_ was more than enoughreason to celebrate Neji didn't trust it. It was very unlike the Uchiha to back down from anything, but it was also not unheard of for him to simply get bored and move on to the next victim.

Neji shook his head. Not knowing was getting to him - that was all. He wasn't afraid, he wasn't even overly anxious – but it was hard to protect someone from something if you had no idea what you were supposed to be protecting them _from_. Absentmindedly he twirled the combination of his locker, opened the door and stowed the books he'd been carrying safely away. Hinata would have to do any homework he had – he didn't have time for trivialities at the moment. The door slammed shut with a satisfying clang of metal on metal but Neji stood staring at the small door for a moment longer, a blank look of total concentration narrowing his eyes, thinning his lips, drawing his brows closer together.

Strange that he wasn't even really troubled anymore. The confrontation had showed him a side of Sasuke he'd nearly forgotten the other possessed. For the first time in years he'd seen the Uchiha for what he was: a boy - and a confused one at that. Not that different from Neji himself. Wryly the long-haired Hyuuga reflected on the power of rumor and distance … it really was true that familiarity bred contempt. For so long he'd been entertained on stories of Sasuke's exploits that he'd nearly forgotten there was a person behind those exploits. One that, despite being severely misguided, wasn't inherently evil. But Neji wasn't stupid – and he'd never been as trusting as Sasuke used to be – so he was erring on the side of caution. Though he didn't fear what the Uchiha could do to him, he was concerned about Tenten's reaction to whatever Sasuke was plotting.

He sighed under his breath as he finally turned away from contemplating the locker door. He couldn't see how he could do more. Though he ensured that he was never too far from Tenten, the problem remained that Sasuke was far too persuasive and Tenten far too naïve. The Uchiha knew every single one of her weaknesses and he wasn't above using them against her. Tenten was rarely left alone – if she wasn't at school where Neji could keep an eye on her, she was with Temari. And Neji knew that the blonde would not let Sasuke within ten yards of Tenten if she could help it, but the few hours that passed between Tenten joining her family for dinner and letting him quietly into the house after they'd all gone to sleep were still far too long for his liking.

The front doors of the school opened to admit a rush of fresh air and late afternoon sunshine, and Neji took a deep breath, wondering how he was going to wile the hours away. As always the siren call from the white powder stashed in his room was nearly overpowering. Neji took another deep breath. No. No, he would not be that weak again. Guilt gnawed at his soul and a small voice whispered that he said that every time.

* * *

Tenten played with the hem of her t-shirt as she waited her turn at the psychologist's office. She was very nervous about this visit. She couldn't lie – not about something important. Omitting the truth to protect others was one thing but actively avoiding telling the doctor something that might impact all the changes they'd been working towards was another.

She was still lost in her melancholy thoughts when the door opened and then time was up and she couldn't ponder her options any longer. Tenten squared her shoulders and marched into the inner office with all the aplomb she could gather.

Finally seated, greetings over, Tenten took a deep breath and met the doctor's soft, gray eyes firmly.

"He hasn't stopped. In fact, I think it's gotten worse – he's hiding it now."

A long silence fell but Tenten refused to give in to the urge to curl into a ball and sob her heart out. She knew what was coming – had known all along but still …

"Have you asked him about it?" The doctor finally asked slowly.

Tenten shook her head, "What's the point? I gave him a choice – and he's chosen. So now there's nothing else to do but live with it. But I'm scared. I'm scared of what he'll do if I'm not there. Right now he's got this idea that he's got to hide it from me so that's placing some limiters on his habits but if those are gone and he really goes for it … I'm afraid of what'll happen."

A smile graced those usually serious lips and the doctor answered wryly, "The point is communication, Tenten. And remember that you are not responsible for his behavior in any way."

"I still can't live with it on my conscience! What if he really does something stupid? No matter how often I tell myself it was nothing to do with me, I'll always know that I could've stopped it!" Tenten argued vehemently only to run out of steam when she saw another small smile curve around the other woman's lips.

"What?" she asked in confusion, aware that she was sounding like a sulky child but unable to help herself. She hated feeling so wrong-footed.

"Nothing," the gentle voice never failed to soothe Tenten's emotions and she subsided back into her seat to listen.

"It's just that you've come a long way since we first met. Listening to you just now really brought it home for me, and I hope that you're proud of your achievement here, Tenten."

Hesitantly Tenten nodded her assent and the doctor continued.

"That's why I hope that you'll be smart enough to realize that you've come too far for it all to be thrown away because you're afraid of something – so afraid that you couldn't even bring yourself to communicate your fears to others involved."

* * *

The heavy door, made of some kind of dark wood, creaked open at the touch of her hand and Tenten just barely managed to suppress her instinctive wince. It was her first time to the Hyuuga household without Neji, and in broad daylight – or early evening at any rate. She glanced over her shoulder but the butler had disappeared and she sighed in relief. Out of place as she was in the grandeur of her surroundings she didn't want any witnesses to the fact that she obviously did not belong here. The air in the manor was stifling – it reminded her of a stuffy library, watched over by a hawkish librarian who would not tolerate the slightest sound. She took a deep breath and entered Neji's bedroom, to wait for him as she'd been instructed impersonally by the butler, and closed the door softly behind her.

In here at least she could breathe. Though the furniture were just as elegant as in the rest of the house, the hand-crafted wood gleaming dully in the light as if proudly proclaiming their antiquity, the stamp of Neji's personality was apparent all over the room. It wasn't so much in the pictures on the walls – abstract paintings that Tenten could only hope to one day understand – or in the dark blue coverings for the bed, or even in the way the furniture was arranged. It was more the evidence of his presence, clothes strewn haphazardly on the floor, spilling out of the large closet, draped carelessly over the arm of a chair, papers spread across the large desk. It was the paraphernalia of daily life that showed this room was inhabited by an actual person and not a machine that allowed Tenten to relax slightly. The rest of the house was like a museum and she'd been afraid of placing even one toe out of line in case she broke something. Something that was sure to be priceless with her luck. The Hyuuga manor was far removed from anything Tenten had ever experienced. Her parents were modern, liberal, and though quite well-off for the most part, none of her friends lived in houses like this. The closest she'd come was the Uchiha mansion – and even there, tradition was sacrificed for comfort.

Curiously she paced across the room, tracing her fingertips over the smooth wooden furniture as she went. She stopped in front of his desk, wanting to see what he'd been working on, but as her fingers touched the surface of one page the door behind her swung open with that same creak, and Tenten spun around in fright.

Hinata froze in the door way when she looked up from the stack of papers she held in her hands to see Tenten standing by the desk. For a moment the two girls stared warily at each other before they relaxed – simultaneously and as if by pre-arranged signal – and Hinata entered the room fully.

"Hey."

Tenten tried to sound casual, as if she and Hinata had been meeting in Neji's bedroom for years but the truth of the matter was that she barely knew Hinata – the girl's aristocratic bearing had always put her off - made her feel as if she was lacking in some way. Next to Hinata she was very aware of her ragged nails – she'd taken to chewing them in times of stress – her plain t-shirt-and-jeans ensemble and the way her hair curled haphazardly out of the buns she'd tied it in early that morning.

In contrast, Hinata looked every inch the well-groomed, high-bred young lady she was. Her cream-colored trousers were casual but the linen fabric and cut proclaimed them designer louder than any label could've done. She'd teamed the trousers with a floaty, blue blouse of some fine material that Tenten couldn't even name, her shiny hair hung in perfect waves down to the middle of her back, and though her flawless skin was tainted with a dark blush, Hinata still looked perfect. Insecurity flooded through Tenten. Was this the kind of woman Neji had grown up expecting to marry one day? Was this his epitome of female perfection? What on earth was he doing with _her_ then? Tenten knew that she would never have the cool, poised grace of the girl in front of her and she couldn't help but wonder if Neji expected her to start displaying Hinata-like qualities. The frantic thoughts were quickly derailed, however, when she finally registered the deepening blush on the Hyuuga girl's cheeks - she almost appeared to be glowing - and when Hinata reached hesitantly past Tenten to place the sheaf of paper on Neji's desk, Tenten was surprised to note the slight shaking of her hands. Then it hit her. Hinata was shy – painfully shy by the looks of it. All the years Tenten had assumed that the Hyuuga heiress kept aloof because she thought herself better than her peers … and here it turned out that the girl was actually just not very good at dealing with strangers.

Tenten realized she was staring, and Hinata was now pushing her two index fingers together so hard that it looked painful, so Tenten decided to take pity on the other girl's obvious discomfort.

"I don't think we've ever really met," she said, with the friendliest, least threatening smile she could manage, "I'm Tenten."

"I know," Hinata replied with a quick glance upward but when her eyes met Tenten's she quickly dropped her gaze again, "it's nice to meet you though. You know – officially. I'm Hinata."

"I know but it's nice to finally meet you too, Hinata."

Tenten decided that maybe backing off a little would be of more use in dealing with the girl and walked over to Neji's bed. Perching on the end of it, she said brightly, "I'm waiting for Neji. Obviously. The butler said it would be okay to wait here…" Her voice trailed off uncertainly now she was back on the topic of butlers and imposing homes but, to her surprise, Hinata raised her head and gave her a sunny smile.

"Don't worry. It's fine to wait here. None of the family ever comes here. Aside from me, occasionally."

Hinata's dark hair swished with a silky sound as she shook it out of her eyes and made her way over to sit next to Tenten on the edge of the bed.

"What do you mean?" Tenten asked curiously, unable to pass up the chance to find out a little more about the inner workings of Neji's life.

"Just, you know my dad and Neji don't really see eye to eye. So he never really checks up on him. I think dad thinks it's easier to just let Neji be so only I ever come here and then only to drop off homework for him, usually."

Tenten stared at the other girl in consternation, not really sure what to make of her revelations. "You do his homework for him?" she finally asked, deciding to reply to the most mundane part of the statement, "but he ignores you when he's not actively ridiculing you! Why would you do something – _anything_ – nice for him?"

Hinata dropped her gaze again, started twisting her fingers together on her lap, and finally chanced a look at Tenten. The look more than piqued Tenten's curiosity. It was a look filled with wariness, as if Hinata was debating whether to allow Tenten in on family secrets. Finally she shrugged.

"Neji wasn't always like this. And underneath it all I know he hasn't really changed."

The cryptic words left Tenten frustrated, and longing for more information, but how to get the girl talking? Finally Tenten decided to take a chance, to level with Neji's cousin and hope that the other girl would be equally forthcoming.

"I love him," she told Hinata bluntly, "and I can see he's getting worse every day."

Light eyes turned away to stare out the window and Tenten wondered if she'd maybe overplayed her hand but then Hinata turned back to face her and the sadness that shimmered in her eyes told Tenten eloquently that she hadn't been wrong about Hinata – she cared about her cousin.

"I know. But there's nothing you can do, Tenten. This is what Neji does. Over and over and over again. My dad says that Neji cannot be tamed – sometimes he'll allow you to slip the bridle on for a while but inevitably his demons will drive him to self-destruction. He'll be fine for months, a year even, and then one day he'll just start the whole vicious cycle again. And for another few months he'll handle his drugs and his parties really well – never going overboard – but then it'll gradually start spinning out of his control. And when he falls, so hard that he can't get up again, that's when my father will pick him up, get him into a good rehab center and then, for a while, he'll be calm again."

Silence fell as the girls reflected on the gloomy pronouncement and Tenten found herself whispering her greatest fear to Neji's cousin, a girl she barely knew, when she couldn't articulate the words to anyone else, least of all Neji himself.

"What if this is the time that he can't be picked up? What if this is the time that he finally does self-destruct totally?"

Hinata's eyes darkened but she kept a steady gaze on Tenten who could feel the recognition flowing from the Hyuuga girl. They were entirely on the same level. Tenten sighed.

"I want to help him, but I don't know how. I don't know what to do, what to say, to make it better for him. Everything I do just seem to make it worse."

Hinata shook her head slowly, laid a soft, small hand on Tenten's arms and met the older girl's gaze earnestly, "He's never been this happy before."

Tenten shot her a disbelieving look and Hinata blushed, a light laugh falling from her lips, "Alright. Maybe not _happy_, exactly. But he's content. The chaos inside him has been under control far longer this time."

They shared a smile, a quiet moment passing between them, and Tenten took a deep breath, gathering her courage again, "What changed him, Hinata? What happened to him?"

The raven-haired girl shifted in her seat, suddenly uncomfortable, the blush – absent till now – spread across her cheeks again and she resumed her nervous finger twisting.

"I don't think … I-I mean … th-that i-is … Ne-Neji should t-tell you …"

Tenten grabbed Hinata's fingers, stilling their movement and forced the other girl to meet her gaze, "You know I can't really help him unless I can understand where he's coming from. And you know him, Hinata. You know he'll never tell me himself – not while he's on this kick and then it might be too late."

Hinata stilled, bit her lip indecisively, her eyes flickered between Tenten and the door and then she was rising gracefully to her feet. Tenten tried to swallow her disappointment, the irrational tears, tried to will herself to believe that Neji would open up totally before it was too late but, to her surprise, Hinata paused with her hand on the doorknob.

"Come on," she said over her shoulder.

Tenten rose to follow gratefully after the other girl, suppressing the twinges of guilt over prying into Neji's secrets when she should be waiting for him to feel comfortable enough to tell her himself. _I don't have a choice here_.Tenten tried unsuccessfully to convince herself of the rightness of her actions but then Hinata had disappeared around the corner and Tenten pushed the thoughts away as she hurried after the other girl.

* * *

They were settled in Hinata's bedroom, each with a long glass of fruit juice and Tenten could barely contain her impatience any longer. Neji was bound to be home soon and Hinata had been stubbornly quiet while she'd gotten them the drinks. To Tenten's surprise Hinata's bedroom was nothing at all as she'd imagined it. Instead of frills and lace the room was surprisingly spartan – full of clean, modern lines but the effect was restful and Tenten was quickly coming to realize that one should never underestimate Hinata's inner strength. Though she was shy she was still a Hyuuga and, though her presence would never be as overwhelming as her older cousin or her father's, she was still a force to be reckoned with when she set her heart on something. Vague regret that she hadn't gotten to know Hinata better years before washed through Tenten but then Hinata set her glass down, and took a deep breath, and all other considerations flew out the window as Tenten listened with all the concentration she could muster.

"Now, I don't know all the details – some of it only my dad knows, some of it only Neji knows, some of it … I don't know if anyone really knows, but the point is, I can only really give you a brief overview of events. Not even all events at that." A grimace pulled at the Hyuuga girl's mouth but Tenten nodded, and Hinata took another breath before continuing.

"My uncle and my father had a falling out years ago – just after my grandmother passed away and my granddad decided to retire. My dad, as the eldest son, took over the running of the businesses but he and my uncle worked side by side, sharing a lot of the responsibilities. This was all before we were born so I'm not really sure about any part of it, but then something happened and they had a huge fight. My dad – though he shared with his brother – had control of everything and he cut my uncle off without a penny. Shortly after, my uncle married my aunt and a year later Neji was born. I suspect that maybe my aunt had something to do with the rift between the brothers but that's just speculation – and whether it was a case of them fighting over her or whether my dad just thought her beneath his younger brother … I don't know," Hinata shrugged and took another small, dainty sip from her glass.

"Anyway, growing up I never even knew that my dad had a brother, much less that the brother had a family. The first time I saw them – and only at a distance – was when I was three, at my granddad's funeral. But my father never talked about his brother and I forgot he even existed until I was twelve. It was this really horrible night – windy, rainy, cold – and uncle Hizashi showed up at our door. I remember wondering if the weather was a sign that bad things were about to happen but at first it appeared as if my father was happy to see his brother. He'd come alone you see. I don't know where Neji and my aunt were but my dad took Hizashi straight to his study. They were in there for a long time and we'd just begun to wonder if they'd patched the rift up when they started shouting. I've never heard my father shout like that before then and he never has since. I'm not sure what happened but I know that my dad told his brother that if he left, then he should never darken out doorstep again. My uncle left. Later I gleaned from the servants' gossip that apparently uncle Hizashi had come to ask my dad for help. He'd swallowed his pride but somehow it had all gone awry and he left here on worse terms with his brother than before."

For a moment silence fell as Hinata took another drink, and contemplated her next thought. Tenten let her be, deciding that there would be time for questions after Hinata's tale.

"A week later we heard the news that my uncle was dead," Hinata looked down at her fingers again, "My dad cracked. I don't know if it was guilt or grief but he locked himself in his study for two days and when he came out he looked terrible. For the longest time I didn't know what had happened – my uncle was healthy, in his prime, it wasn't possible that he'd taken ill and died since the night he was here. Again, I gained most of this from gossip, but then, three years ago or so, I found some papers by accident that confirmed the rumors," Hinata paused in her re-telling of events to fix Tenten with a piercing gaze, "what I'm about to tell you does not leave this room – I don't know if Neji knows this, and if he doesn't, I don't want him finding out if I can help it." The warning glare she leveled at Tenten was pure Hyuuga and inwardly Tenten marveled at the striking resemblance Hinata bore to her cousin when she wore such an expression.

"Of course not," Tenten replied softly, "you know I would never do anything to hurt him."

Hinata blew out her breath, puffing her cheeks out, and reached for her glass, her fingers sliding around and around the rim in such a hypnotic gesture that Tenten nearly missed the Hyuuga girl's softly spoken words.

"Hyuuga Hizashi didn't die of some strange debilitating sickness that took hold quickly – he hadn't been in a car crash, or a mugging. He committed suicide."

Tenten could feel her breath leaving her lungs, could feel her fingers clenching around her glass in shock but she was barely aware of anything except the rush of sympathy for Neji.

Hinata quickly resumed her tale, the words rushing out at great speed now, as if she was anxious to get the story out of the way.

"Anyway, my dad went away and came back with Neji. From then on he spent most weekends here. My dad loved spending time with him – Neji was the son he'd never had but wanted so badly – and soon he was even talking about getting Neji transferred to school here. He could visit his mother on weekends and holidays. But the point became moot because a few months later Neji's mom died – turns out she'd been really ill for a long time – and Neji came to live with us full time. For a couple of years everything was perfect. He and my dad grew closer as my father taught him about the family business and then, one day, it all just … fell apart."

Tenten stared at Hinata with wide-eyes but the other girl shrugged, "Another mystery. One day Neji and my dad just seemed to suddenly start hating each other. Neji started partying hard and he was with Sasuke more than here. And my dad let him be. I don't know why, because Neji just went from bad to worse during that period."

"It's all Sasuke's fault," Tenten breathed bitterly, aware now of the tension leaving her body with the end of Hinata's story.

Hinata glanced up at Tenten, surprise coating her features, before she frowned in confusion, "I know they're not exactly friends anymore but Sasuke saved Neji, if anything."

It was Tenten's turn to stare at Hinata in surprise.

"I thought you knew," Hinata said, confusion apparent in her voice, mingling with uncertainty, but Tenten motioned impatiently for her to continue.

"Well, you know about Sakura getting hurt, right?" Hinata asked and Tenten nodded, "before that Neji and Sasuke were friends – had been even before Neji started partying with him. But they seemed to fall apart too – Neji's gotten quite good at alienating people – but then Sakura went through the window. For a few days, while Sakura was unconscious and in surgery, everything was looking bad for Neji. The Haruno's refused to believe that their precious cherry blossom could possibly be anything other than a sweet, innocent angel and they accused Neji of spiking her drink, trying to force her, and when she fought back, pushing her through the window."

"What?" Tenten couldn't keep the gasp of outrage from exploding but she shook her head to indicate that Hinata should ignore her and, after another uncertain pause, Hinata continued.

"Between the Haruno's, my dad and Uchiha Itachi they kept the whole thing pretty much covered up but Sakura was unconscious, the facts were against Neji – most people there could only testify to seeing Neji and Sakura struggling before he pushed her and she went through the window. For some reason, some stupid, chivalrous idea of keeping Sakura's reputation intact if I know my cousin, Neji refused to say anything more than that it had been an accident. When Sakura finally woke up, Neji asked me to get a note to her, that I managed to get in through one of my friends pretending to visit, and the note only told Sakura that he was sorry and that he wanted her to lie. To save herself." For a moment Hinata looked a bit shame-faced, "I shouldn't have read-"

"It doesn't matter," Tenten managed to get out between clenched teeth and Hinata shot her a frightened look before taking up the story again.

"Anyway, Sakura told her parents that she couldn't remember because of the drugs and so the case against Neji just got worse and worse. I don't know how many people my dad bribed but in the end there was only so much he could do. The Haruno's were dead-set on pressing charges. And then Sasuke saved Neji. He gave a statement, saying he was there, he saw it all happening - how Neji had only given Sakura a light push but that she'd slipped on the rug and thus fallen through. He told them how he'd been with Neji all night and that Neji hadn't even looked at Sakura much less tried to take advantage of her. He stuck to the story no matter how anyone pressured or cross-examined him – I got the distinct impression that Itachi wasn't too happy with him for getting involved - but nonetheless, his story tallied with Neji's, it made sense in light of the statements they'd taken, and no one could ever prove that it had been Neji who'd 'spiked' Sakura's drink, so they dropped the case and everything was sealed in Neji's juvenile records."

A long moment of silence passed before Tenten realized that Hinata had come to the end of her revelations – and only then did Tenten begin to feel the tension radiating through her muscles. She forced herself to relax, muscle by muscle, kept her face perfectly blank, but inside she was a mess of confusion. Everything Sasuke had put them through in recent months – how did the past tie into all she'd just learned? Why would Sasuke be saving Neji's ass from jail, only to turn around and threaten to send him there if she didn't play along? But Hinata was staring at her curiously, and Tenten shelved the thoughts to be picked at later, and smiled weakly at the other girl.

"Thank you for telling me all of this, Hinata. I swear I'll never breathe a word to anyone."

* * *

The pounding beat, the haze of smoke, the writhing bodies … all of it was so familiar to Neji that he couldn't even be bothered to pay attention as he pushed his way deeper into the Uchiha mansion. He knew very well that he was highly unwelcome here – more so now than ever before – but since when had that stopped him? He suppressed the giggle that wanted to bubble up from the pit of his stomach and cursed himself for having thought that smoking a joint was a better idea than doing a couple of lines. He hated the effect of marijuana – had no desire to appear like a total idiot - but he had to keep a somewhat clear head if he was to accomplish what he'd come here to do.

He searched through the crowd, looking for that distinctive shade of pink … she shouldn't be too hard to find - either in the basement or in the middle of wherever a dance-floor had been created. But he had no desire to enter that basement tonight, and she hadn't been at the center of the twisting bodies as he'd expected her to be. Neji slowly climbed the stairs, hoping against hope that maybe he'd find her in the bathroom. The slow walk, and the slower pace of his thoughts, brought back so many memories. Memories he'd been suppressing for so long he'd thought them forgotten…

_Neji clung to the banister with all his strength, laughing as he'd never laughed in his life. Sasuke blinked owlishly up at the long-haired boy, and the expression of mild surprise mingled with confusion only made Neji laugh harder. From far away he was aware that watching Sasuke trip over his own feet to fall flat on his ass on their way upstairs wasn't really all that funny, but it was _Sasuke _and his expression really was just priceless … Neji doubled over again. _

_Finally, with a weak gasp for air, Neji sank down onto the stairs next to Sasuke. _

"_This was definitely your best idea ever, Uchiha," he sighed as he sank back against the steps, allowing the relaxation to flow through him again._

"_Hn," the Uchiha grunted, "I didn't think Dei would give us any."_

_Neji frowned slightly, Sasuke slurred his words, and since he'd matched the Uchiha drink for drink and hit for hit, did that mean that he sounded the same? Neji shook his head … no, it was just Sasuke who'd reacted that way to the drugs and alcohol he decided finally. For a long time the two boys lay there on the stairs in a companionable stupor until a tinkling voice broke through their hazy thoughts. _

"_Awwww … aren't they cute?"_

_Itachi loomed over them suddenly and Sasuke jerked in shock, a wary look crossing his features as he tried to ascertain whether his brother was angry at him. But Neji was really only aware of the girl that stood next to Sasuke's older brother, the one who thought they looked cute. For the first time in his fourteen years he found his self-control to be non-existent, he wanted to look away from her body but he just couldn't …_

_A sharp slap to the back of his head made him glare sluggishly at Sasuke but the other was already on his knees, using the banister to push himself into an upright position._

"_Enjoying your first time?" Itachi's voice was laced with amusement, "whatever Dei gave you … get it from me next time and I promise you a party you won't forget in a hurry."_

_Both Sasuke and Neji turned suspicious eyes on the eldest Uchiha but he only shrugged at them, "Hey, I can't stop you anyway, maybe if I can keep an eye on you you'll get bored with the party scene, little brother." _

_Sasuke grunted, and turned back to the task of getting his legs to work, but Itachi laughed and pushed past the two boys sprawled on the stairs, drawing the girl after him and up the steps. Neji remained exactly where he was as they stepped over him … and got a delicious flash of creamy thigh before Sasuke kicked him in the ribs and he set to dragging himself up the stairs with his friend. _

"Earth to Hyuuga!"

The sharp, female voice cut through the memories and Neji shook his head slightly as he focused on the blonde waving her hand in front of his eyes.

"What?" he demanded irritably. Ino had never been a favorite of his.

"Mind moving?" she asked sarcastically indicating the people backed up on the steps below him. Neji turned back to the blonde girl, hating that she was a couple of inches taller than he was from her vantage point of two steps ahead. But all irritation faded to be replaced by hope when he caught sight of a pair of curious green eyes peeking out from behind Ino's blonde mane.

"Sakura," his voice came out rougher than he'd intended and Neji cleared his throat before trying again, studiously ignoring the suspicious looks Ino kept sending at him.

"Sakura, may I talk to you for a second?"

More than a minute passed before the pink head bobbed up and down but then Sakura was turning, making her way back up the stairs and Neji quickly brushed past Ino as he followed after her. On the landing, Sakura turned sharp left and entered a bedroom. She walked to the middle of the room and turned around, crossing her arms, an expectant look on her face as she waited for Neji to enter the room after her.

Neji closed the door, fighting to think clearly - everything depended on the outcome of this conversation.

"I have no right to ask it of you – and I won't blame you if you say no – but I need your help." The words finally came out in a rush, nothing at all like the suave, persuasive argument he'd been building in his head for the last couple of weeks.

Sakura's eyebrows rose in surprise, "_You_ want _my _help?" Her voice rose incredulously. "When you haven't even said so much as 'good morning' to me in years – you suddenly expect me to help you?"

The stoic mask was slipping over his features, Neji could feel it, but he couldn't stop it. He didn't know how to be anything else, and he knew that it was all important to be honest in this discussion. Though he knew the way to get to Sakura was to subject her to emotions – she was such a soft touch – he just couldn't bring himself to start that charade again. In the past faking puppy eyes and mouthing a few angst-filled sentences had come quite easily but now he knew the true agony that deep feeling brought – and he found that his respect for the girl in front of him stopped any fake posturing to get what he wanted.

"You're right. And I don't deserve to be helped. But I'm not really asking you to help me – I'm asking you to help Tenten."

Sakura paused, mouth still opened for the angry words she'd been about to utter, but her mouth closed with a snap as she eyed him warily.

"How would helping you help Tenten?" she finally asked, calm now.

"Sasuke," Neji answered simply, "he listened to you a couple of weeks ago when you told him to leave us alone for a night. He might listen again."

A bitter laugh bubbled from her shiny pink lips, "Yeah right. He was surprised - that's the only reason he listened. What the hell makes you think he'd listen to _me_ about dropping this crazy vendetta the two of you have got going?"

"It's worth a shot," Neji returned quietly, stuffing his balled fists into his pockets, "and it's the only option I've got. Nothing else has worked. All we need is a good plan…"

* * *

Neji stumbled into his room hours later, completely drained, but thankfully sober and clear-headed again. The last part was especially good since Tenten was sitting cross-legged on his bed, hugging his pillow to her chest. Neji sighed. Hours spent trying to hash out a decent plan of action with Sakura had left him in no mood to deal with Tenten's censure but he gritted his teeth as he closed the door behind him.

"Where were you?" Tenten asked quietly when it became apparent that Neji wasn't about to break the silence first.

"I had some things to take care of."

Neji kept his tone deliberately vague as he pulled his shirt over his head and moved into the bathroom. The bright fluorescent lights glittered off the clean, white surfaces and Neji winced. He turned the shower knobs until the water was at the right temperature, and quickly shed the rest of his clothes, before stepping gratefully under the spray, hoping against hope that Tenten would take the hint. But of course, being Tenten, she didn't. Instead, she followed him into the bathroom. Through the frosted glass of the shower doors Neji could just make out her figure perched on the edge of the tub before the fog coated the opaque glass.

He took a couple of deep breaths and braced one hand against the wall, allowing the water to rush over his head. Her presence scratched at his nerves. More than anything he needed some time to himself - just a few moments of peace in which to get his thoughts straight. And, to be perfectly honest, he also needed some time to consign the guilt over deceiving her to the deepest, darkest recesses of his soul. Neji scowled at the tiles in front of him. He'd never felt guilty before. Not when his uncle had to bail him out of whatever mess he'd gotten himself into, not when Sasuke had to drag his drunk and stoned ass to bed during his first few months partying hard … not even when he'd fall off the wagon after having painfully clawed his way up the sheer cliff-face of addiction. Never. But he'd promised Tenten. And somehow a promise to Tenten was different from a promise made to anyone else.

Anger bubbled through his veins and with sudden clarity he realized that she was trying to control him – to change him – despite _her_ promises, and that really just wasn't fair. He quickly soaped his body, washed his hair and turned the water off. Grabbing the towel hanging over the side of the stall, he wrapped it around his hip,s and finally turned to glare at Tenten who was still waiting quietly on the edge of the tub.

He opened his mouth – and decided that it was just too much trouble. He swiftly left the bathroom and by the time Tenten rejoined him in his bedroom he'd traded the towel for pants and was rubbing his hair briskly to dry it.

"What do you want, Tenten? Or are you just going to follow me around all night?" He finally lost his patience when she settled herself wordlessly on the bed, still watching him.

"Why are you so touchy tonight, Neji?" she returned quietly and Neji seethed silently as he opted to ignore her again. Deep down he knew he was being unreasonable, that he had no reason to direct such irrational anger at Tenten but, right now, he was just looking for a figurative punching bag and he had no idea why.

"I know, Neji," Tenten broke the silence and Neji froze. Her tone was low, intimate, understanding and that just made the guilt worse…

"I know you're still using." Her voice was caressing, tender, and Neji turned to face her with an inscrutable gaze.

"So?" he finally managed, trying to sound indifferent instead of strangled. Was she about to leave? Was she going to tell him to get lost? Was that the reason her voice was so uncharacteristically gentle, when the topic was so very controversial? Neji sat down on the edge of his bed, keeping his back turned to Tenten, stiffly awaiting her response.

He could hear the creaking of the springs in the mattress, could feel it shifting as Tenten moved, but it was still a shock when her warmth brushed against his bare back, when she pressed a soft kiss to his shoulder and wrapped her arms around him, resting her cheek against his skin.

"I'm not going to fight with you, Neji. I don't want to. I accepted that I couldn't change you at the start of all of this and I'm going to stick to my promises. I'm not going to nag at you to change."

Slowly the tension started to leave his muscles, as always her proximity had that effect – his blood was boiling with anticipation, rushing exultantly through his veins, and Neji allowed the feeling to grab him and sweep him along. For a short while at least he wanted to enjoy the cleansing forgetfulness her presence brought.

"Then what are you going to do?" he asked warily. He knew her well enough to know that Tenten did not let go of something once she set her mind to it. She wouldn't suddenly just give up. No, there had to be a catch.

"I'm going to help you," she whispered into his ear, the brush of her breath along his skin making him shudder lightly as her hands began to draw patterns over his chest and his stomach.

"Help me…" he whispered back, the haze beginning to clouding his thinking.

"Yes, help you to overcome it," Tenten confirmed.

The softness of her curves was suddenly gone and Neji turned around instinctively. Tenten shifted sideways and pulled him fully onto the bed. Neji lay back against his pillows, watching silently as she moved to straddle his hips, her body just barely brushing his own. Vaguely he reflected that even a couple of weeks ago he would've laughed if someone had told him that he'd ever let another control his body this way – but with Tenten it was alright, with her it was safe … with her he could lie back and enjoy the feather-light touches as her fingers danced over his skin…

Only with massive effort did Neji manage to focus on her last words and form a reply to them.

"How is this going to help me?" he muttered thickly as her lips brushed against his own – lightly, teasingly.

Tenten lowered herself slowly allowing their bodies to touch more firmly – her hips moving in a slow sweeping motion and Neji nearly moaned, his hands flying to her hips, his own thrusting upward as he pulled her firmly down against his body. The relief the friction brought wasn't nearly enough and Neji opened his eyes to glare reproachfully up at the girl swaying above him as he ground their bodies together. She grinned mischievously down at him.

"For now, why don't you just forget? Hm?" Tenten smiled down at him, and pulled out of his grasp, sliding slowly down his body with deliberate movements, taking what clothing he had on with her in her process. Just before the warm wetness of her mouth closed around his aroused flesh, she pressed a small kiss onto his hip and whispered, "For now … let me distract you."

Neji groaned, low and deep, when her mouth closed around him, and conceded that maybe it would be a good idea to just forget for a while… allow the emotions to settle. Tenten moved slowly, taking him deeper inch by torturous inch, and as Neji fought against the urge to simply bury his hands in her hair and force her forward, he found that with Tenten it was easy to forget …

* * *

_**A/N: Review?**_


	21. Chapter 21

_**A/N: So. I'm back … did you miss me xD Seriously, I'm really sorry about the delay but I hope that you'll enjoy the chapter nonetheless and I sincerely hope that updates will be quicker in coming in future! Thank you sooo much to everyone for your patience and your continued support! Not to mention all the reviews/faves/alerts.**_

_**Warnings: All the usual ones apply**_

_**Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto … it is currently owned by a man with a fascination with frogs …**_

* * *

_**Chapter 21**_

She was talking. A continuous barrage of sound but Sasuke only allowed it to slide over his head without really hearing the words. Water off a duck's back and all that. He really had no desire to listen to whatever half-assed plan Neji had talked Sakura into. They really must think him exceptionally stupid – as if he wouldn't find it strange that Sakura suddenly sought his company.

Her voice escalated, the sounds becoming progressively shriller and Sasuke suppressed the sigh that wanted to escape – it had taken her long enough to catch on to the fact that he wasn't paying her the slightest attention. Grudgingly he focused his attention on more than the way the light shone down onto her hair and glimmered in her eyes and forced himself to gather his thoughts – he'd had enough of this waste of time.

"Again, Sakura, I ask why you're doing this for Hyuuga?" Sasuke interrupted whatever she'd been about to say and watched in satisfaction as she paled slightly. So, he'd been right in his assumptions.

Sakura watched him warily for a moment before she seemed to gather her scattered thoughts, "This has nothing to do with Neji, Sasuke."

An eyebrow arched in disbelief seemed to be enough of a response and so Sasuke chose to remain silent, instead waiting for Sakura to make the first move. Past experience had taught him that silence was always a more effective weapon than verbal abuse – especially when it came to Sakura. She couldn't stand it if someone didn't reply to her, she'd inevitably start babbling and that was exactly what Sasuke wanted in this instance.

As always, Sakura didn't disappoint: she started to fidget, shifting her weight from one foot to another, and finally, unable to stand the silence, she blurted her thoughts into the space that separated them. Though they were quite alone up here in the second floor hallway of the Uchiha mansion, Sasuke had judged it prudent to remain as far away from her physically as good manners dictated. The one lesson he remembered from his mother – and for some reason it had stuck.

"I'm doing this for Tenten," Sakura watched him warily, through half-lowered lashes.

Sasuke barked a short laugh, "Yeah, right. How touching. You're so close that you'd willingly go along with any plans Hyuuga has – just for her? Give me some credit, Sakura. Does she even know that her so-called _friend _used to fuck the love of her life?"

Sakura blanched and Sasuke took a savage sense of pleasure in that but beneath it all he was just so tired of all of this. The hatred, the lies, the betrayal … maybe it was time to exorcise the final demon from his past… His eyes narrowed as he focused on Sakura's slight figure hovering uncertainly in front of him.

He took a deep breath.

"I'm not interested in whatever scheme you and Hyuuga cooked up. But I won't say that I'm against being … _persuaded_ … to leave Tenten and Hyuuga alone …"

Sasuke watched intently as the realization slowly dawned in her emerald green eyes. One thing he'd always appreciated about Sakura was her ability to _understand_ him. Most of the other girls were just really vapid and annoying. But not Sakura. Never Sakura. And maybe that's why he enjoyed punishing himself with her – maybe that's why he'd never really been able to fully let go of her.

Slowly Sakura closed the distance between them, Sasuke watching warily all the while. One step, two … until she was directly in front of him and he was forced to tilt his chin downward to meet her eyes. He watched in mute incredulity as her hand slowly made its way up his chest, to wind into the spiked locks at the back of his head … he hadn't really thought she'd take him _seriously_…

"Then let me persuade you," she whispered as she stood on tip-toe.

And Sasuke allowed the pressure of her hand clenched in his hair to guide his mouth downward until their lips met…

* * *

Neji stirred sluggishly. He had to give credit where it was due: when Tenten set out to distract, really _tried, _she definitely succeeded. Said girl was draped over him, her body warm, their skin sticking together and, as he worked at disentangling himself, he vaguely wondered what time it was. Finally able to move without some part of Tenten's body hindering him, he swung his legs over the side of the bed and ran his hands through his tangled hair. The green numbers of his alarm clock read 11:30 pm and Neji groaned quietly to himself. It was late. Too late for Tenten to still not be home. Her parents were going to kill her.

"Ten, wake up."

He ran a hand up and down her bare leg suppressing the shudders that muscle memory brought when she moaned slightly.

"Wha-what?" Tenten mumbled sleepily, peering blearily up at him.

"We have to go. It's late. Your parents."

Even as he spoke Neji was already standing, reaching for his discarded pants, pulling them on. Spying his shirt on the other side of the bed, he made his way over there, giving Tenten a push as she'd still not moved from her sprawled position.

Ten minutes later, with many prods and pushes from Neji, they were both dressed and presentable again, and as they made their way quietly down the servants' stairs of the Hyuuga household, Neji kept a hold of Tenten's hand. She loosely twined her fingers around his, stifling giggles with her other hand, and Neji inwardly marveled at how he could find such a small action enjoyable. The constant fear that he would fuck up the best thing that had ever happened to him could easily be confined to the darkest reaches of his consciousness when he was with Tenten like this. When he was sure that she wouldn't just disappear in a puff of smoke ... when he had her body to hold onto ... when he was blanketed by her acceptance, her _love _... when he was sure that _his _love was returned ...

* * *

Neji killed the engine quickly as he double parked in the street before Tenten's house. No sense in getting her into trouble if she wasn't already. Silence reigned for a long moment as they both simply stared out into the night.

It was cloudless, starry, the half-moon creating just enough light to make out the dark shapes of trees and buildings. Finally, Neji cleared his throat and Tenten sighed.

"I know. Are you staying tonight?"

Slowly Neji shook his head – for some reason he felt the distinct need to be alone tonight. Before he could even begin to dwell on those thoughts he pushed them aside.

"Not tonight. I have some things to take care of early tomorrow. But I'll see you later in the day."

Pleasurable shivers chased down Tenten's spine at the slow gentleness in his voice – he was trying. So hard. Trying to take her feelings into account and that fact warmed her more than anything had in the last weeks. The stress, the worry about Neji, faded a little and she allowed herself to hope. Maybe he really was trying to change.

She reached over and, palm over his cheek, turned his face toward her. The distance between them seemed to disappear in the blink of an eye though Tenten hadn't been aware of moving and then Neji's lips met hers. Soft, warm, his tongue stroking slowly over her lower lip …

Tenten broke the kiss quickly, clearing her throat, thankful for the darkness that hid the flush on her cheeks.

"Okay. Call me. Night."

She turned and opened the car door but before she'd managed to actually get out a rough hand dragged her back. His lips were insistent, the pressure of his mouth harder than before and, as always with Neji, Tenten knew he was trying to tell her something through the suppressed violence of the kiss. What that could be she had no idea at the moment, she couldn't think with his mouth on hers, his hands tangling in her hair as he cupped her head, angling her for his kiss, but she dreamily decided to decipher the hidden messages later.

Too soon he pulled away, breathing harshly and gave her a gentle nudge.

Aware that she was probably smiling like a fool Tenten got out and quickly made her way up the drive, feeling Neji's eyes follow her every movement.

* * *

Tenten stared in suspicious disbelief at the scene in front of her.

Slowly she ran through all the facts in her head: she was at school, it was broad daylight so she wasn't dreaming, and Neji- _her_ Neji – was leaning against Sakura's locker, looking for all the world as if he belonged there. The pink-haired girl – someone she had once called a friend – was standing next to him, a hand on his arm as she spoke quietly, but insistently, into his ear. Though the scene appeared entirely innocent, some sixth sense … some gut feeling told her that all was not as innocent as it seemed.

She didn't even really jump – had no real fear – when _his_ dark, silky voice spoke up from behind her. Vaguely she mused that it was entirely fitting … all the scene had lacked previously was Sasuke. His venom was the last piece of the puzzle that put the whole thing together seamlessly. And so she stood quietly, unresistingly … allowed him to spew his hatred into her ear. Part of her listened, part of her focused on the visuals, and her brain shut-down momentarily as she tried to process it all.

Was this the reason that Neji hadn't stayed the night in over a week? That first night she'd accepted it without comment – without thought really – but such an abrupt change … nights apart had been rare until a week ago … there had to be a reason behind it all.

And Tenten couldn't help but feel that she'd just discovered that reason.

* * *

The shadows were distracting. They danced across the off-white of her walls as the leaves outside were ruffled by the wind. Moonlight spilled in through the window, forming a pool of silvery light on the carpeted floor of her bedroom, and Tenten groaned as she buried her face in her pillow.

Sleep just would not come. No matter how she tried, no matter how many sheep she counted, the blissful oblivion remained just out of her reach.

Neji wasn't there. Again.

This time he hadn't even offered an excuse … he'd merely bestowed a quick kiss to the corner of her mouth after school saying he'd see her later.

Jealousy burned like acid in her belly, rising to her lungs until it felt like she would choke, shame covered her like a blanket as she finally allowed the sick imaginings to roll like a movie clip in her mind's eye. Neji kissing Sakura, running his hands through her pink hair …

Tenten shook her head violently and sat bolt upright in her bed. For a moment she stared with unseeing eyes at the shadows that adorned her walls, wondering if this was what Neji had felt like seeing her with Sasuke … but no, that couldn't be … how could he bear to be near her if that was the case? How did he keep himself from lashing out at her, hating her …

All else aside, at that point he hadn't loved her, had he? Had he ever really loved her? Or had that only been another smooth line … another piece of pity that occasionally chipped from his icy heart?

A shudder ran down her spine … no, after all they had been through, she had to believe that he'd been honest. That his feelings were real. But there was really only one sure way to find out.

Her mouth firmed into a thin line, determination squared her chin and Tenten shook her loose hair back from her face. She was sick of all the spy games – the hiding, the secrets, the lies … no, she would play this game no longer.

A few swift movements propelled her from the safety of her bed and into a whirlwind of motion as she swept around her room, searching for clothes. It didn't matter what she wore, so she grabbed the first pair of jeans her hands touched, the first t-shirt. She didn't even bother with her hair, except to run absentminded fingers through its length.

The door eased open quietly, and Tenten tip-toed down the hallway, making her way stealthily toward the front door. Whether Neji was with Sakura or not – there was only one place he could be if he wasn't with her or sleeping, and since it was barely midnight she doubted that he was asleep.

The front door squeaked slightly as she eased it open and Tenten winced as she froze into place, waiting for the sounds that would indicate she'd been caught. Several tense moments of silence finally convinced her that the sound had gone unheard and she slipped silently from the dark house. Once in the car, she allowed it to roll backward without turning the lights or the engine on … the sound of the tires on the gravel was already pushing it.

Finally on the road she started the car, taking comfort in the familiar soft purr and only when she rounded the block did she turn the lights on. Her mind set firmly on her goal, Tenten stepped on the gas pedal and made for the Uchiha mansion.

* * *

Sasuke smirked humorlessly the moment his eyes lighted on Tenten hovering in the doorway that led to the basement. She stared around her with intensity and Sasuke could nearly feel the raw tension she was almost vibrating with. Gracefully rising to his feet, he made his way over to welcome her in – she was his guest after all…

"If you're looking for Hyuuga, I haven't seen him in a while … he's probably with his new best friend," Sasuke drawled lazily as he leaned one shoulder against the wall right in front of her. He couldn't help the smirk from appearing as she visibly shrank away from him.

The glare was a nice surprise though – seemed as if some of her spirit was finally surfacing again. Sasuke watched her carefully, noting the play of light in her eyes as anger darkened the irises to the color of melted chocolate. And Sasuke found that he just couldn't resist…

"Poor Tenten," he murmured softly, reaching out to stroke one finger from her temple to her mouth, "cast aside like yesterday's laundry. But then, it's not like you haven't been warned. And this turn of events is not altogether surprising … it's not like Hyuuga hasn't done this before."

Satisfaction surged like molten lava through his veins, slow and inexorable, when Tenten stared up at him warily, her gaze clearly asking him to elaborate.

Sasuke sighed theatrically, and turned so his back leaned against the wall right next to the doorway where Tenten was still hovering.

"You see, Tenten. Once before Neji wanted someone out of his life. His solution? Sleep with someone close to that person. And when you think about it, that course of action would get the message across loud and clear. But let's be more specific," Sasuke turned his head so he could watch her reaction from the corner of his eye, his intent gaze shielded by the fall of dark hair across his cheek, "this is not the first time Hyuuga used Sakura in such a way."

Her reaction had been worth waiting for. Tenten paled, one hand instinctively rising and fisting in the material over her heart – as if she wanted to rip the searing pain out of her chest. That burn … that excruciating torture … Sasuke knew it well, and the loneliness lifted slightly at the thought that there was now someone in the world who could understand that pain as deeply as he did.

"No," she whispered, so low that Sasuke had to strain his hearing to discern the words over the sound of music and voices, "Sakura would've told me. Neji wouldn't do that to me."

She raised her eyes to his, and though still pale, her voice was stronger now, "That's why I'm here. To talk it out - before the misunderstanding gets out of hand."

Sasuke chuckled, the sound filled with dark amusement, "I don't think you're hearing me clearly, Tenten. Neji fucked Sakura before – what's to stop him from doing it again?"

She shook her head, vehement in her denial of this ugly truth, and Sasuke's patience snapped. Just like before, when the hatred had burst forth at Neji, the emotion poured from his mouth, delivered in a dead staccato tone, but searing his flesh as the words pushed up from his gut.

"_Yes_," he hissed at her, "I was there. Believe me, I know. Let me tell you a few things about your sainted Neji-"

"If you're referring to Sakura and the window-" Tenten interrupted, fire blazing in her gaze.

Sasuke threw his head back and laughed, "If you think that's the worst he's done … No. Sakura was an accident. His fault, of course, but entirely unintentional."

Again that wary light rose in her eyes – the kind of light that told him he had her undivided attention even if she knew that she shouldn't be listening to him. So, Sasuke continued even though the flare of emotion had already faded, even though his heart was no longer in his actions.

"Neji's mother was ill. Very ill. And after his father died and Neji came to live with his uncle and cousins … well, he left her alone. The odd weekend here and there was all she saw of her beloved son – all he could _spare _her as he settled into his privileged position as the prodigal son his uncle had always wanted. Now, that can easily be excused as the selfishness of a young boy that didn't want to admit to himself how dire his mother's predicament really was … but Neji took it a step further. He could have asked for his uncle's help in making his mother's life more comfortable … who knows … with Hiashi's money and influence she may even have lived long enough to see her son graduate high school. But in typical Neji fashion the moment he no longer benefitted from her presence in his life – when he no longer needed her – he conveniently forgot about her. The poor woman died alone. And only then did Neji pretend to care, only then did he show regret. Too late. When nothing could disrupt his life anymore."

Sasuke watched her eyes widen, watched her mouth open in shock, watched Tenten struggle to find words to defend Hyuuga.

He watched her fail.

"Now ask yourself if Neji had ever expressed the need to save you …" Sasuke watched understanding dawn in her eyes and nodded once.

"Yeah. You were nothing more than a way for him to exorcise the guilt inspired by his mother's ghost…"

He pushed against the wall with his shoulders, straightening his legs almost lazily and lifted his glass slightly, mockingly, in Tenten's direction before turning on his heel and walking away. For once, he damage he'd just dealt Hyuuga did not bring a smirk to his face, for once he could not feel satisfaction flowing through his veins. All he could see was the betrayal brimming in Tenten's eyes along with the tears that glittered like crystals on her dark lashes.

* * *

_**A/N: So … do I deserve a review? *makes puppy eyes* Pretty please let me know what you thought! And don't worry – Neji's not all as bad as he seems at the moment xD Bear in mind that we are getting the information from Sasuke's POV… anyways … don't forget to hit the button below!**_


	22. Chapter 22

_**A/N: Thank you so very much to everyone for the reviews/alerts/favorites! Meh, this chapter is definitely not the best I've ever written but I hope you enjoy it nonetheless! Please remember to review ^^**_

_**WARNINGS: All the usual ones apply**_

_**Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto**_

* * *

_**Chapter 22**_

Tenten glared blearily at the shiny surface of the bar - hoping against hope that the world would spin and, after completing the revolution, dissolve into something that made some kind of sense. She reached for the shot-glass that rested on the polished surface in front of her, slowly bringing it to her lips and, as she tossed the fiery liquid back, she could only relish in the burn – and wonder why on earth she'd ever stopped partying like this, though she was, admittedly, not really the life and soul of the party at the moment. But the alcohol helped her to forget … it numbed the pain that Sasuke's revelations had brought and at the moment that was all Tenten wanted.

She was aware of Sasuke hovering in the shadows somewhere behind her – why she didn't know or care - she was aware of the loud laughter, the louder music and the flashing lights that created the club-like atmosphere in the Uchiha basement, but it was a distant awareness. All she could focus on was the enveloping darkness in her heart that was spreading slowly from the center to encompass her entire being. To be truthful, she welcomed it – urged it on. Loving Neji had brought her nothing but heartbreak and Tenten found that she was so incredibly tired of it all. She didn't want to care about him or his doings … wished more than anything that none of this had ever happened to her.

_It is better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all._

The age-old saying pounded in her head and Tenten couldn't stop the bitter laugh from falling past her lips. Clearly whoever said that had clearly never experienced heartache – no one could ever possibly want to remember this sensation. She wished more than anything that she had never even laid eyes on Hyuuga Neji. But below the muddled and bitter thoughts lay the memories and it hadn't all been bad. The memory of his touch burned her skin, the memory of his mouth brought tingles to her lips, and the memory of being enveloped in his arms brought tears to her eyes.

She wiped at the offending wetness with a harsh hand, shaking her head to dispel the emotions whirling inside her. She'd thought she'd be safe in his hold – that Neji would never let her fall. It never occurred to her to doubt Sasuke's word. The Uchiha was many things … but a liar he was not. And the absolute conviction his voice had held left her in no doubt that Sasuke had been speaking nothing but the truth. The horrible part was that she couldn't help but agree with him.

The need Neji had to keep her away from anything that could possibly harm her, the way he constantly tried to protect her … it all made sense now. He'd tried … so hard … to help her get past her problems … and she'd always found it endearing how he tried so hard only to reach his breaking point, leaving her to pick up the pieces of _his _life … but how much of that had been true caring? Had he ever loved her at all? Really? She didn't doubt that Neji _thought _he loved her – in some way. But Neji had never been one to deny himself anything … and she wouldn't put it past him to justify his current behavior with perfect Neji-logic …

She reached for the re-filled glass, wondering how many she'd had … but found that she didn't care … she raised the glass to her lips, hand shaking slightly as she tried to keep it steady, only to have it taken from her grasp as it finally neared her lips …

"That's enough, Tenten," Sasuke said.

* * *

From the shadows Sasuke watched Tenten drown herself in shots of whiskey.

She looked … utterly defeated. Without hope and no longer caring that she'd hit rock bottom. He could see the periodic tears that slipped silently down her cheeks, they left sparkling wetness in the dried tracks of older tears, and he wondered if there was a permanent groove on the soft flesh by now.

For the second time guilt ripped at him. Maybe he shouldn't have told her – he hadn't really meant to. Finally, it sunk in … finally he really _got _what Hyuuga had been trying to tell him all this time.

Tenten was innocent in all of this. Neji, Sakura … they were fair game, but Tenten … she'd had nothing to do with the betrayal. She was not to blame.

She was just a girl.

A girl Hyuuga loved but still … just a girl. A girl Sasuke had no right to involve in his plots and schemes. For the first time Sasuke could see the unfairness of it all, could appreciate the pain Tenten had been put through in his and Neji's silent war. A war in which Tenten – the one innocent of any wrong-doing - was the only casualty.

The guilt gnawed again. Its razor-sharp fangs bit into him and Sasuke swallowed against the bile that rose in his throat. Valiantly he tried to recall the blanketing iciness that saved him from feeling. She wasn't the first girl he'd ever hurt … and he'd done worse to most of those.

But Tenten reminded him. It always came back to that. Watching Tenten reminded him of how he'd felt – used, discarded and undeserving. Anger had rushed to his rescue … anger and arrogance had saved him from fully falling into the despair he witnessed in Tenten now. He didn't break. But it appeared that Tenten didn't have that healing anger at her disposal. She could barely gather the strength to lift the next glass of liquid oblivion to her lips.

In surprise Sasuke identified the pang he felt every time he looked at her slumped figure. He felt _sorry _for Tenten …

And maybe it was because he could understand her pain, because he could fully sympathize and relate, but Sasuke gave up on figuring out the conflicting emotions and simply reacted to the almost sub-conscious decision to help her.

Slowly he placed his glass on the end of the bar and moved until he stood next to Tenten. She never even noticed his approach. She lifted her glass, trance-like, to her lips and, hand shaking, tried to balance the drink enough so that it would pour down her throat and not over her face.

Everything felt ridiculously surreal and Sasuke watched his own actions from far away and in slow motion.

He reached for the drink, took it from her hand, placed it back onto the bar, and opened his mouth. And even to his ears Sasuke could hear the gentleness in his tone when he said,

"That's enough, Tenten.

* * *

Her head turned slowly. Mussed brown hair swung silkily around her shoulders and her glazed eyes met Sasuke's obsidian ones. Her voice was slightly slurred when she spoke but Sasuke was relieved to note that she wasn't falling-down-drunk yet.

"Why'd you take it?" she demanded and pushed his hand out of the way so she could reach for the shot glass again.

With one hand Sasuke pulled her back, keeping a grip around the back of her neck, and with the other he pushed to shot-glass away so it slid out of her reach.

"No. It doesn't help. Trust me. Let's go sober you up."

Sasuke tensed himself for an argument, readied himself to manhandle her out of her seat if he had to but to his surprise she merely turned obediently and wearily looked up at him.

"What do you care? But, whatever," she shrugged as she stood, not fighting his hands as he assisted in keeping her steady.

She turned towards the entrance to the basement but nearly fell over as her legs tangled with his and Sasuke sighed as he wrapped an arm around her waist, lifting her until she leaned her weight back against him. Once he was satisfied she had her feet securely on the ground he slowly began to guide her towards the doorway.

His mouth was set in a thin line, and Tenten could almost feel the waves of irritation rolling off the Uchiha but she stayed quiet. She didn't really care if he wanted her to sober up or not – didn't bother to think about his motivations or his actions. She merely followed along in his wake.

They'd nearly reached the door when a flash of pink caught Tenten's eye and she felt the tears well up again as she watched Neji and Sakura enter the basement together. Again, they weren't touching, there were no overt signs, but their body language very clearly indicated that they were focused on each other.

That hurt. More than it should have. After all, she'd had some time to get used to the idea and Tenten had bargained on the alcohol numbing the pain. What she hadn't bargained on was Neji and Sakura emerging from wherever they'd been holed up tonight.

She wasn't ready. She wasn't prepared.

Dully Tenten wondered if she would ever be ready to see them together …

The sharp, searing pain tore at her insides and for the first time in months Tenten felt the black despair pushing up from inside her. It was too _big_ … too _much _… her slender frame couldn't hope to contain it, but it was trapped inside her and the pressure was unbearable … it felt like she would explode if she didn't find an outlet …

Tenten whirled so she wouldn't have to face those feelings … tried her utmost to suppress the black monster that was slowly waking deep inside her. But she was too late and the tears were already leaking and she felt so _ashamed _at her weakness…

Sasuke was still there. He'd held on to her swaying form throughout her mental anguish and Tenten reacted instinctively as she registered the warmth of his body so close… she sought comfort from his heat, buried her face in his chest as she tried to swallow the lump that lodged painfully in her throat.

She was barely aware of his arms closing around her, barely aware of her legs nearly buckling, only vaguely heard his snarled obscenity as he lifted her slightly again to try and keep her upright. If her nose hadn't been clogged with tears and the smell of Sasuke's shirt she would've registered Neji's presence long before she felt his touch on her back.

"Back the fuck off, Uchiha."

She heard Neji's low voice at her back, promising violence unless Sasuke complied with his demand. She pushed away from Sasuke and slowly turned around.

Neji's features were contorted into a mask of rage, his pupils dilated so she knew that he wasn't really himself, his hands were still on her hips trying to draw her towards him, the touch angry and possessive. Sakura hovered just behind him, anxiously shifting from one foot to the other as she leveled a concerned look at Tenten's tear-stained face.

The anger came.

The blessed fire of murderous rage washed through Tenten's veins like a flash flood in the desert. It burned the pain away … left her empty but clear-headed.

"Don't touch me," she told Neji coldly. Savage satisfaction burned like acid in her stomach as he dropped his hands, a surprised and slightly hurt look lurking in his eyes. Without acknowledging Sakura – even when the pink-haired girl reached a hand out to her – Tenten pushed past all of them, heading towards the stairs. She had to get out of here. Now.

She'd barely gone two steps, the lull in the music seemed almost _too _perfectly timed, when she heard Sasuke's voice – snide tone back in place.

"You lose, Hyuuga. _Now _we're done."

It was too much. It was all just too much. For too long she'd been a pawn in their battles with no real idea of what the war was even about. The anger was already there and the monster roared for blood, but Tenten wasn't thinking. The emotions roiled through her – so hard and fast that she barely had time to process each one before it melded into the next.

She whirled around and only realized she was shouting when she registered the high-pitched sounds of her own voice vibrating through the air. As if they could sense the fight brewing someone had turned the music off but Tenten found that she didn't care anymore. Let them all hear.

"You!" she rounded on Sasuke, smugly registering the look of wary surprise in his dark gaze, "You're no better than him!" she jerked her head in a confused-looking Neji's direction.

"Both of you are so fucking sure that you're right. You're both so set on dealing as much damage to the other as possible that you don't even care who gets caught in the cross-fire. But I'm done with this. So you'll have to find another pawn. Looks like you _don't _win after all, Sasuke."

She whirled on her heel, thankful that her balance held, but then the emotions turned over again and Tenten found herself turning back.

"You know what really gets me, Sasuke? How you've gone out of your way to ruin everything for Neji. How you're so fixated on exacting your revenge that you can barely see past the anger when he's in the same room. But you still saved him. You were the one who came forward and backed him up when Sakura got hurt. You hate him so much – why didn't you sit back and let events unfold? When he needed you the most you were still there – so why the_ fuck _are you still pretending?"

Dead silence greeted her half-hysterical words and Tenten watched in detachment as Sasuke and Neji both froze. The silence dragged on and finally her words began to sink in but Tenten could only watch in horrified fascination as Sasuke glared at her.

Slowly Neji turned towards Sasuke – wariness written in every line of his frame.

"Is it true?" he asked quietly.

Sasuke continued to stare at Tenten – she could feel the murderous intentions flowing off him and finally Sakura stepped forward slightly and cleared her throat. With a hesitant look between the three of them she spoke softly.

"Yes, Neji. It's true."

Slowly Neji turned on Tenten.

"You knew? All the fucking time you knew? And you didn't say anything?"

Again Sakura spoke up, her voice and gestures conciliatory.

"No one really knew … I think only my parents, your uncle and Sasuke and Itachi knew - I don't know how Tenten does-"

She never got to finish her sentence, without a word to anyone – and studiously avoiding looking at Sasuke – Neji stalked towards the stairs. It was only as the last flash of his hair cleared the corner that Tenten felt her limbs release from the paralysis she'd been held in moments before.

Instinctively she turned to chase after Neji. She had to make this right. He wasn't stupid; before too long he'd figure out that the only person who could've told her was Hinata, and Tenten had made a promise to the shy girl – didn't want her subjected to Neji's wrath simply because she'd let her emotions get the better of her.

She reached the top of the stairs, swerved into the hallway, frantic thoughts chasing through her mind.

"Neji! Wait," she called after his retreating back.

To her surprise he did stop. She slowed to a halt a couple of meters away from him and waited warily as he turned slowly to face her.

"I have no idea of what the fuck is going on tonight. With you and Uchiha, with what you said – none of it makes sense. But, you know what? I don't. Fucking. Care."

He snarled the words at her and Tenten couldn't keep the wince from lifting the corners of her mouth. She tried to speak, began to explain, but Neji cut her off.

"No. Just stop. I don't want to hear it. You were not supposed to hide this kind of thing from me. You were not supposed to be clinging to Uchiha like you'd drown if he let go. You did this and somehow you're angry at me? Well, sorry, Tenten but I guess I'm done too. Now leave me the fuck alone."

The anger flared anew – what _right _did he have? To judge her? To say these things to her?

"How dare you judge me? Or Sasuke for that matter? At least neither of us ever pretended to love someone so we can feel less guilty about letting our mothers die alone."

She barely registered the shock, the pain, the anger flashing through his eyes as she turned and ran up the stairs, blindly making her way deeper into the bowels of the mansion. The black pressure was back – worse than ever before and gasping sobs heaved through her body.

Tenten shook like a leaf in the wind of a new storm as she ran down the hallway. There was a doorway at the end of the hall and Tenten grasped the handle of the door, uncaring of where she would find herself. The pressure was unbearable, she would finally break, she knew it. She would splinter in a thousand sharp little shards and she wanted to be alone when the inevitable break occurred.

She closed the door behind her, blindly felt ahead of her until she touched cool tile, the other hand clenched over her heart. Her back hit something solid. The wall? And she sank down to the cold floor as rivulets of tears made their way down her cheeks. The gasping breaths slowed after a few minutes and Tenten blankly stared around the spacious bathroom she found herself in. It was obviously used on occasion since various toiletries were scattered around.

Her eyes sought out the slight glint of metal on the shelf above the sink. Her breathing slowed even more until she was taking short, shallow breaths. Involuntarily her fingers lifted to trace the raised outlines of the scars on her wrist.

For a long moment Tenten remained exactly where she was. She fought against the pressure that was whispering seductively. Promising that with release would come relief from the agony whirling in her gut.

Slowly Tenten stood. On trembling legs she took the three steps needed to be in touching distance of the razor and its sharp blades. It glinted dully in the moonlight, winking at her, beckoning her …

As if in a trance Tenten lifted her hand and drew the small piece of metal from the shelf…

* * *

Tenten ran up the stairs and part of Neji wanted nothing more than to follow after her. To pull her into his arms and forgive her anything. He ruthlessly suppressed that part of his mind; sealed it into his heart along with all the other secret aches and regrets for things left unsaid and undone.

He turned to leave but slowed to a stop when movement caught the corner of his eye. Neji knew that it was Sasuke before the other cleared his throat to signal his presence.

"What?" he asked wearily, half turning towards the Uchiha, "do you want an official declaration of thanks?"

Slowly Sasuke shook his head, "No. I did what I did and it's done. Forget it."

Neji relaxed somewhat at these words and turned to leave again but Sasuke's voice stopped him in his tracks.

"Where's Tenten?"

His fists clenched and unclenched involuntarily and Neji took a few deep breaths to try and keep his composure.

"I'm sure she's just waiting for you to come and find her," he ground out, "she ran that way." Neji jerked his head in the direction of the stairs.

"Neji. You total fuck-up."

Sasuke sighed and, as Neji whirled around to fix the other boy with an incredulously angry glare, the raven-haired Uchiha ran a tired hand over his face.

"She doesn't want me. She never has. And I don't want her. Yes, I've tried to get between you but … that's different. Go after her for fuck's sake."

Before Neji had the chance to formulate a coherent response from the confusing chaos in his mind a loud thump, swiftly followed by the crash of breaking glass rang through the still air of the landing.

Light eyes met dark in an intense stare and then both of them were running. Up the stairs, rounding the landing, towards the origins of the sound. Sasuke got there first, Neji only a few seconds behind, and déjà vu pumped through the air around them as Sasuke slowly opened the bathroom door.

* * *

Dull moonlight poured through the bathroom window but even in the scant light Neji could make out the dark rivers of blood that pooled relentlessly beneath Tenten's sprawled form.

Fuck. There was so much blood.

Both of them froze in horror and then Sasuke reached over to snap on the over-head fluorescents suddenly bathing the scene in white light that made it all too horribly real.

The crash had been caused by Tenten's fall, Neji surmised. She seemed to have tried to balance herself by holding on the table that stood below a mirror on the opposite side of the sink. The table had held an ornately arranged bouquet of flowers in a cut-glass bowl and she'd pulled the entire thing over with her as she fell.

Tenten herself laid in the middle of the floor – a mess of blood, water and broken flower petals surrounding her too-still form. Her left arm was on the floor, next to her body, and Neji realized that the pooling blood came from a deep cut on her wrist. His eyes widened then narrowed as his suspicions were crystallized into solid fact when he caught the glint of cold steel still clutched in her right hand.

The sight galvanized him into action and Neji quickly made his way to Tenten. He knelt next to her uncaring of the blood and water, and called over his shoulder to Sasuke.

"Call an ambulance. Now!"

He was just barely aware of the motion as Sasuke turned and ran down the hall. He reached a shaking hand out to brush her bangs from her face and jerked in shock when he realized that her eyes were open. Tenten watched him listlessly as he whispered helplessly to her. He hated that he couldn't do more, but he was afraid to move her, afraid that he'd make it worse, so he merely reached for the nearby hand-towel and held it firmly against her wrist in the hope of stopping the blood, though he knew his efforts were useless. The cut was just too deep.

"Just hold on, Ten."

His eyes flickered to hers and he leaned closer when he realized she was trying to say something.

"…sorry … Neji. Didn't … mean … to. Accident," she smiled slightly up at him when he shook his head and pressed a quick kiss to her forehead.

"Doesn't matter. Just hold on, okay?" he glared at her, trying to convey his urgency to her but she merely kept on smiling and slowly closed her eyes.

Fear pooled in Neji's gut, his limbs wanted to turn to water as her eyes fluttered closed, but true panic only set in when Neji heard her faint whisper as her breath stirred the air softly.

"…love you."

The panic was barely disguised when Sasuke followed by Itachi entered the bathroom seconds later. Neji glared at them but Sasuke quickly shook his head.

"I called an ambulance."

Neji sighed as he sat back, his gaze returning to Tenten, the tension thick in the room.

"We'll have to take her in ourselves," Itachi muttered as he straightened from his crouch, his inspection of Tenten complete, "the ambulance is taking too long and she's lost too much blood."

With a quick nod, signaling that he understood Neji swiftly tied the blood-soaked towel as tightly around her wrist as he could before he gently picked her up, trying to jostle her as little as possible in the process.

Every second counted. But while he held her, he could still feel the beat of her heart. Slow and fading but _there_, so Neji gritted his teeth and forced the fear and the panic away.

She would _not_ die.

She _couldn't_.

He needed her.

* * *

_**A/N: So … what you think? *peeks at readers from behind her hands* Leave me a review and let me know? *makes puppy eyes***_


	23. Chapter 23

_**A/N: I'm sorry! –wails – I meant to update earlier, really I did but, meh ^^" … Okay, I really got no excuse! Though I did find this chapter very difficult … so don't judge me too harshly! I hope that you enjoy it xD Thank you so very much for all the reviews/alerts/favorites – you guys are beyond awesome and I do a happy dance for each and every single one.  
Please do leave me a review, they keep me motivated!**_

_**Warnings: You know the drill**_

_**Disclaimer: Disclaimed  
**_

* * *

_**Chapter 23**_

Hospitals were universal. They looked the same, despite varying color schemes; they smelled the same … all hospital buildings were infused with that sense of gut-wrenching fear and despair.

Neji glared listlessly at the specks of blood that remained on the backs of his hands despite his quick and frantic wash earlier. His clothes – papery surgical scrubs that crackled dryly with every movement – were blood-free. Once the hospital staff had realized that he would have to be forcibly removed if they wanted him to go, they'd stopped trying to get rid of him and instead focused on getting him out of his blood-soaked clothes.

He was barely aware of the Uchihas waiting patiently with him; he couldn't bring himself to care enough to tell them to get out. From beneath half-lidded eyes he watched as Itachi spoke to a police officer while Sasuke fidgeted in his slumped pose on the hard, plastic chairs. Thus far no one had mentioned drug-and alcohol tests but Neji found that he didn't care about that either.

All he cared about was the faint traces of Tenten's blood all over his body.

He hadn't wanted to change his clothes – in some way the bloodied fabric helped him to remain close to her, helped _him_ to help _her – _and he'd only succumbed to the change of clothes since it was the condition that allowed him to stay.

Carefully he traced the bloody streak on his left palm with the forefinger of the other hand. Fitting, somehow, that this particular stain refused to budge; it almost drew a parallel line with the cut on Tenten's wrist …

_Her_ blood.

Flowing, pooling, on the hard tiles …

And then this one small smear…

Superstitiously, Neji closed his hand, carefully balling it into a fist so the blood was protected … so that Tenten would be bound to life by the connection between them; he could feel her essence seeping through his skin … and though Neji had never been a superstitious or sentimental person, he found himself hoping against hope that Tenten could also feel the gossamer threads that bound their blood together.

Though his eyes were focused on his feet, movement caught the very edges of his vision and he couldn't help involuntarily tensing up at the elder Uchiha's approach. Neji shot a side-long glance at Sasuke, somewhat relieved to note that he had also tensed up. Vaguely Neji wondered what the departure of the police meant; the officer had shaken Itachi's hand and taken his leave.

Suppressing the instinctive need to run, Neji straightened his spine. No force on this earth would move him until he knew whether Tenten would be alright; his only fear in that moment was that his dismissal from the hospital waiting room was imminent.

There was no way that he was going quietly, Neji vowed silently, his mouth firming into a thin, cold line.

"This is the last time I'm saving your ass, Sasuke."

Itachi's voice was low, grim, his expression only serving to reinforce the furious under-tones lurking in his voice.

Neji smirked mirthlessly. That probably meant that he needed to call Hiashi and get a lawyer … his muddled thoughts were interrupted by the elder Uchiha's dark voice as Itachi trained his obsidian gaze, full of disdain, on Neji and Sasuke in turn.

"Goes for you too, Hyuuga."

Itachi turned back to his younger brother, the mask of contempt coating his features never changing.

"The cops won't be asking too many questions. I convinced them that I was hosting a get-together for a few friends and that the three of you must've gotten hold of a few bottles. No one is being charged with anything since this is clearly an interrupted suicide attempt."

_No! This is my fault – mine. Tenten would never … it was an accident …_

Before Neji could argue, Itachi had taken a deep breath and continued.

"I may not have been the best role model for you; I'm not claiming to have been a saint but the two of you …" Itachi shook his head, slowly, "you've taken depravity to a whole new level. Fucking up someone's life simply because you can? Is that fun, Sasuke? Does this make you feel good? A girl is fighting for her life and it's at least partly your fault …"

Itachi's cold, dark gaze encompassed them both, somehow instilling the sense of shame that had been conspicuously lacking until now.

"Two little boys so afraid of facing themselves that they need to destroy in order to feel real … you're the school-yard bullies picking wings off defenseless insects … for all your posturing neither of you are anything more than that."

Long, raven hair glided silkily over one black-clad shoulder as Itachi turned slightly before glancing back; the rapier thrust of his gaze so filled with scorn that the shame in Neji bubbled sluggishly as it pushed through his veins. He could feel Sasuke trembling next to him; whether in anger or humiliation Neji couldn't tell. Itachi turned away fully and Neji's sigh of relief caught in his throat when the Uchiha spoke again.

"You sicken me."

* * *

Neji splashed cold water over his face while firmly keeping his eyes shut – he had no desire to see the tell-tale red rims around his eyes. Somehow it didn't bother him that despite Itachi's departure Sasuke had chosen to stay and was thus privy to this moment of ultimate weakness.

It didn't bother him because it didn't _matter_.

It had been with a sense of absolute disbelief that Neji had finally come to the realization that whatever had happened in the past, whatever anger had driven him on … none of it mattered …

The doctors had been with Tenten for hours now.

At the insistence of the hospital staff Neji had finally pulled his scattered and fear-ridden thoughts from their never-ending cycle of what-ifs and if-only's, for long enough to remember that Temari would definitely have Tenten's home number. He'd dreaded the arrival of her parents; didn't think he'd be able to handle the guilt … but his suddenly re-discovered conscience had reminded him that he was not the only one who cared about Tenten.

So, he'd approached Sasuke and reluctantly asked for Shikamaru's number and, having finally gotten through to Temari that no amount of screaming at him was going to change the seriousness of the situation, Tenten's parents had been notified. The little-boy part of him was secretly relieved that Temari had hung up on him before he could get the necessary numbers – he was more than happy to stand aside and let someone else carry the burden of telling a parent that their daughter was hovering somewhere between life and death.

Neji grimaced wryly at down at his hands. _A leopard never changes its spots. _

The worst part had been that, when Tenten's mother and step-father had anxiously rushed through the door, he'd taken courage from the fact that Sasuke had stepped nearly imperceptibly closer; a gesture of solidarity. When they'd been younger it had been part of their unspoken code: neither took the fall for something alone, irrespective of whether the other had been involved. Though he'd been grateful, Neji had been well aware that Sasuke really had no part of this guilt. For once, the Uchiha had been trying to help …

Sasuke had reluctantly spoken up when Neji had wondered out loud for the umpteenth time what had upset Tenten in the first place – and then he'd known without a doubt that his predictions had come true. He'd always known that he would fuck up – that Tenten would get hurt … and now it might be too late to tell her … to explain … it had never been about Sakura … since Tenten … there could be no one else. Ever. Without Tenten there could be no Neji; she was his sole redeeming feature and look where that had gotten her …

Pain seared through his left hand and Neji stared at the cracks in the wall in absent-minded surprise, he hadn't been aware of clenching his fingers into a fist, much less lifting his arm to punch the wall. Slowly, he opened his hand, stared at his bruised and bleeding knuckles while barely feeling the throb of pain, as his very soul jerked in panicked fear.

The smear of Tenten's blood was gone …

Washed away, disappeared under the pressure of the running water from moments before.

Gone.

Without a trace. As if it had never been. But Neji could still feel the mark it had left, his palm tingled … he could feel _Tenten_ seeping slowly through his veins – a soft susurration so like her voice whispering in his head …

Still staring at his hand, unaware of his surroundings, uncaring in truth, Neji backed slowly away from the sink, until his back connected with the cool tile of the wall.

Now even the burning on his skin was fading, and finally it sunk in that he might never see Tenten smile again, might never hold her close … might never have the chance to tell her how much she meant to him, how she'd changed him for the better … how she'd made him whole in a way he hadn't been since his father's death …

The burning had transferred to his eyes, his vision was blurring, the emptiness inside was building to encompass everything; it weakened him, made it impossible to think … to fight it …

Neji slowly sank to the floor, his back against the wall, elbows resting on his bent knees, hands involuntarily lifting to press the heels of his hands to his eyes, hoping against desperate hope that the action might somehow contain the agony …

He swallowed against the painful constriction in his throat, leaned his head back against the hard tile …

And, against his will and despite his best efforts, a lone, silent tear slid down his cheek.

So lost in his thoughts - torturing himself endlessly with pictures of what Tenten's life could've been if only he'd been strong enough to stay away from her - Neji never even heard the door swing open on creaky hinges. He felt Sasuke's presence though – could feel how at a loss the Uchiha was, could sense him struggling for words, only to stay silent in the end.

There were no words.

Nothing written or spoken could fully express and contain what Neji was feeling, and Sasuke knew that – for which Neji was grateful. But then, it wasn't really so strange that Sasuke understood him so well. Vaguely, half-hysterically despite his mask of indifference, Neji reflected that maybe the problem was that their friendship had always been doomed – they were too alike…

And Tenten had paid the price for it.

Neji took a deep breath, dropped his hands away from his eyes and, ignoring the wet tracks on his cheeks, he stared straight ahead when he spoke, his voice as gravelly from disuse of the past few hours as his tone was heavy with the anguish swirling in his soul.

"What have I done?"

Sasuke was silent for a long time. And Neji couldn't bring himself to look at his one-time friend, couldn't even gather the energy to wipe away the evidence of his tears; he felt no shame.

Sasuke cleared his throat but another pregnant pause followed before the raven head of hair dropped and Sasuke ran his fingers through his already messy hair.

"We," he finally said, heavily, the word breathed on a sigh filled with regret and Neji's brows drew together slightly in confusion, and though he never directed so much as a glance at the Uchiha, he knew the other could feel his questioning thoughts.

"What have _we _done," Sasuke's voice was low, the whisper cracking through the years of ice. Slowly the Uchiha crossed the floor and without a word settled himself next to Neji on the cold, hard floor.

Neji leaned his head back against the wall again in silent acceptance and, moments later, Sasuke followed suit, both wordlessly acknowledging that, in this moment at least, they were glad for the presence of a friend.

* * *

There was a white light, faintly tinted rose, but Tenten couldn't discern where it was coming from. It simply _was. _How she knew that it was a rosy light when she wasn't even sure if she had corporeal form, Tenten wasn't sure, though it hardly seemed to matter.

It was beautiful. Peaceful and serene. She was floating in this pretty, happy place and she had no desire to ever move again.

Something nagged at the back of her mind – something she felt she really ought to remember but a buttery ray of light fell through the suffused cotton candy that surrounded her, cushioned her, and she was distracted. She'd nearly forgotten that something had disturbed her peace when the sound made itself known again.

It was … a voice? Dark and deadly and it made shivers skate down her spine (did she have a spine?) but it was filled with sadness and regret and Tenten suppressed the instinctive urge to hide from it. Instead she tried to focus on the voice – tried to tune it in the way one searched for strands of music through the static of radio waves…

" … I'm sorry. For what it's worth. And I know that it's absolutely worthless to you – my apologies that is."

A dry laugh, sounding like death turned over, broke through the words and Tenten concentrated with all her might but she couldn't place the voice, didn't know what it was talking about – all she knew was that the voice scared her … woke some kind of primal fight-or-flight instinct she hadn't even known she possessed. The voice was reminiscent of deep, deep pain … it sang of heartache and shattered souls and Tenten wanted nothing more than for it to retreat and leave her to her soft haven. But, like a song that gets stuck in your head, now that the voice had been tuned in it refused to recede.

"I'm not important here. Your parents – they're suffering. And Neji – he's just … he's … for his sake …" there was the sound of someone swallowing heavily, " you know what he's had to live with … he's already blaming himself for this … don't let him put this on his shoulders too … I don't think he can survive it."

Another trembling breath and Tenten cursed the unknown speaker's need for air – she'd been on the point of identifying the voice.

"Tenten. If you can hear me … come back. Neji needs you."

Without warning the words clicked something into place and Tenten jerked in shock.

_Neji!_

The need to see him, touch him, punched holes through the cottony stuff she'd been cocooned in and with sudden clarity Tenten realized that she needed to fight. Slowly she pushed against the softness surrounding her, disbelief at how resistant it was to her efforts spurring her on to try harder…

_Neji…_

The voice was quiet now and Tenten silently begged it to come back. To help. To give her the strength to punch through the suffocating rosiness that was pushing against her …

_Neji._

Surprise stilled her efforts for a moment as the thought processes that had been running without her notice suddenly made the connection.

If Neji needed her … then that would make the voice …

_Sasuke …?_

* * *

Sasuke winced as he stretched and his back popped with an audible sound.

It had been nearly forty-eight hours since he and Neji had stumbled into that hellish scene of Tenten damn near floating in blood and water. The doctors were slowly losing hope – they'd done all they could and though they remained cautiously optimistic that Tenten could still regain consciousness Sasuke had seen the evasive light in their eyes when they spoke to Tenten's parents.

He'd finally succeeded in dragging Neji home earlier that day – even if the Hyuuga had refused to do more than take a quick shower and change his clothes. Exhaustion had finally caught up with Neji and he'd fallen asleep a few minutes ago. Tenten's parents had made a quick run home and Sasuke had taken his chance.

The door to Tenten's room had been ajar and no one had seen him slipping inside with the shadows. What he hoped to accomplish Sasuke had no idea but he'd been unable to sleep, unable to do anything, but he had to try …

Instead of feeling the selfish satisfaction he'd thought he'd feel now that Neji understood, in every way, what Sasuke had gone through with Sakura, he'd rediscovered the bond of friendship that he'd always shared with the Hyuuga. That instantaneous connection with a kindred spirit had resurfaced, and with Itachi's voice still ringing in his ears, Sasuke had finally owned up to the fact that they'd strayed far from the path. He'd never truly considered himself a bad person before – he'd done things he wasn't particularly proud of – but he'd never thought himself _sadistically evil_ before. It was as if his brother's harshly spoken words had awakened that part of him that was _Sasuke_; the part that had been overwhelmed by arrogance and selfishness … the part he'd thought was lost forever … the part of him that had befriended a lost-looking boy with long, dark hair in the cemetery so long ago …

_What have we become? _

He couldn't help but wonder silently and he'd seen his need to _change_, to make it right, reflected in Neji's eyes. Sasuke sighed and pulled away from his melancholy thoughts.

He'd read once that comatose people could still hear you but clearly that couldn't be right. Tenten hadn't shown even the slightest sign of reaction…

Some instinct, some disembodied voice whispering instructions, because it sure as hell couldn't come from him; except maybe for Hyuuga he'd never come across anyone less in tune with their emotions than himself, spurred him on to try one last time. Sasuke slowly reached out and hesitantly took one of Tenten's limp, cold hands in his own.

"Please," he whispered, intently watching her for any sign of life.

Seconds became minutes and Sasuke suppressed the disappointment as he slowly withdrew his hand from Tenten's…

He turned away and stood to go…

One last glance – just to be absolutely sure…

Tenten's eyelids flickered.

* * *

_**A/N: The emotion in this chapter … gah! There's no way I could've done it justice xD …But I tried my very best so … if you think my effort deserves it…  
review? –peeks at readers from between her fingers - **_


	24. Chapter 24

_**A/N: Not such a long wait this time, ne ^^ I hope you all enjoy! Thanks for the reviews/favs/alerts!**_

_**Warnings: The whole she-bang … consider yourselves warned!**_

_**Disclaimer: I disclaim ownership of Naruto and anything Naruto-related**_

* * *

_**Chapter 24**_

Neji dreamed of Tenten that night.

Of a different Tenten. One without shadows in her heart and sadness in her eyes. A Tenten who was laughing, teasing, _happy_; Tenten as she had been before their first time in that hotel room. Even in his dreams Neji flinched away from that particular memory; one of his many regrets. _If only …_

Half-awake and yet half-asleep Neji knew he was dreaming, knew that the pictures conjured in his mind were only half-alive memories but the attraction of staying buried in happier times was tempting and he gave himself over to the dream. He floated through the dizzying mixture of emotions and images, simply basking in the glow of seeing Tenten smile … of hearing her laughter.

How long he stayed buried there had no idea, but part of him was ever-aware of the hospital corridors, of movement, of the reality of events. He watched distantly as Sasuke lurked uncomfortably in front of Tenten's door before seeming to make up his mind. The Uchiha slipped silently inside and Neji could feel the ghost of a smirk pulling at the corners of his mouth. There was no point in the Uchiha trying to communicate with a comatose Tenten; she would not respond to him - someone with whom she had no real connection.

Abruptly the dream shifted; the hazy light that saturated the landscape of his imaginings dimmed, as if dark clouds were beginning their slow merge to create a blanket of threatening darkness over the earth.

Neji remembered.

He tried to forget.

Oh, how he had tried to forget … but no matter how he tried he knew he would never be able to entirely forget that Tenten and Sasuke _had _shared an intimate connection …

Forever, in his mind's eye, he would replay the image of Tenten on her knees, Sasuke's hands buried in the dark fall of her hair as he guided her…

Violently pushing the images away, Neji finally succeeded in banishing the dark thoughts. But part of him couldn't help but wonder … was this … this _torturing_ himself … was it his sub-conscious way of trying to justify his own behavior?

The clouds seemed to sink a bit lower and Neji regretfully stared at the light that embodied Tenten as he always wished to see her. But the light was retreating, further and further, in a whirlwind of ashes … and he somehow knew that _he _was represented by the ashes. Darkening, dirtying, the pure, clean light …

His body jerked, as if someone had hooked an invisible rope around his middle; they were trying to drag him further from that light. And Neji wanted to scream, wanted to cry, wanted so many things … but, in the end, as always, he simply stood and allowed events to unfold. Let the decisions of others dictate his actions, reacting only when his own wants and needs were involved.

The darkening clouds threatening rain roiled above his head and the world wept, for Tenten, for the endless possibilities her life should have contained …

He felt shame.

Recognized, for the first time that he detested himself; that he'd become someone he never would've imagined he'd be. Someone he'd never wanted to be.

He'd become his father.

When he'd stumbled upon the truth of his father's death in his uncle's study so many years ago, Neji had felt betrayed. Lost. Alone. The father he'd idolized had been only human after all. And that he could forgive. After Tenten he could even, finally, understand the madness that had driven Hyuuga Hizashi to such extremes.

What Neji had never been able to understand, or forgive, was his father's weakness.

He'd gone to Hiashi; to ask the difficult questions. To gain some clarity … to find some _logic _in the mess that was his father's decisions. Only, Hyuuga Hiashi and his nephew were far too alike, and Neji soon learned that his uncle was unable to give him the answers he so craved. Hiashi, like himself, was reluctant to speak ill of the dead but the barely veiled contempt could be glimpsed periodically in Hiashi's careful replies. Like Neji, Hiashi could not fathom giving up … could not begin to understand it. Defeat was not an option. The first lesson Neji had learned from his uncle.

But harsh words had been inevitable and as Neji learned more of the truth –of his father's plea and of Hiashi's refusal – the anger had spiralled wildly out of his control. Hiashi had told him the unvarnished truth; Neji had been able to detect the sincerity of his uncle's words in the flat, matter-of-fact tone. Hizashi had come to his brother too late – in all senses of the word. When Hiashi had heard of his sister-in-law's illness, he'd employed his own doctors to go over her medical records – secretly, of course. There was nothing anyone could do. Not even the best doctors in the world had been able to salvage a ray of hope – however dim and wavering – from the reports.

She would die. That was the only fact.

Hizashi had refused to listen. Refused to understand what his elder brother was telling him; had blamed Hiashi for his wife's imminent death.

Neji hadn't wanted to hear more. And suddenly his mother's last words to him had made a bitter kind of sense. At first he'd been baffled as to why she would be content to let him live with an uncle she was clearly not on good terms with but, on his weekend visits home, she'd been the same as always, and Neji had quickly pushed the thought to the back of his mind as he adjusted, with childish naïveté, to his new life.

Then, one not particularly special weekend, she'd sat him down and told him that he would not be coming for any more visits, that this was goodbye. He'd wanted to cry, found that he was not able to; he had no tears, and had simply asked why. In retrospect, his mother's wry smile had been because of the fact that he'd already absorbed so many of the qualities of her brother-in-law…

She'd told him that his place was now with his uncle, that Hiashi would give him the opportunities his talents so richly deserved. She wanted him to leave, not because she didn't love him, but because this was the only thing she could do for him, the only gift she had to give. She'd ordered him to forget about her – to not worry about her.

He'd left in anger that day.

And, a week later, his mother had been in the cold ground.

He'd stared at her grave, stayed there for hours, trying to reason through events. Trying to understand. And the only conclusion that ten-year-old Hyuuga Neji had been able to draw was that it was his fault. He shouldn't have been angry at her, should've accepted her gift with grace …

And years later, when he'd found the truth, he'd been overcome by the anger and helplessness all over again.

He'd been angry at Hiashi too. His fifteen-year-old self had felt contempt at his father's weakness, his inability to deal with what life threw at him, but the veiled derision in his uncle's expression had been too much. His uncle had no right to judge …

And Neji had decided that he was through being their pawn. Even from the grave his parents had their hold over him, as tight as any control Hiashi wielded in reality, and Neji had seen for the first time that he wanted to be his _own _person – not a puppet of their creation.

So, decision made, he'd gone to his first party at Sasuke's house, firmly convinced that he would be different, and even months later, when Hiashi had accused him of the same cowardice that had led Hizashi to his end, Neji had refused to face the truth.

But when Tenten's blood flowed from her veins onto the floor, her life slowly seeping away, Neji had acted. The action, somehow, opening the floodgates …

And now, throughout his confused dreams, he suddenly realized that he _could_ change. No, he _wanted _to.

There was one, last, gift hecould give Tenten.

* * *

Sasuke watched warily from the corner of his eye as Neji stared at the tiled floor. The look of concentration that drew the Hyuuga's eyebrows together, darkened his eyes, did not bode well. Even after all this time, after all the hatred, Sasuke _knew _Neji. He instinctively understood Neji's thought patterns because they followed the same routes as his own, and right now Sasuke knew that he was planning on doing something extremely stupid.

But who was he to judge? Having been in the same position once himself, Sasuke found that he could not gather the will to try and convince Neji of a different course of action. He knew too well the guilt that gnawed until you finally _did _something about it…

So, Sasuke watched in silence, heavy with disapproval, as Neji raised his head to stare in the direction of Tenten's room. They were close enough, out in the hallway, to hear the voices. The doctors were finally satisfied that Tenten was stable, her vitals good, and thus the questioning had begun despite the cautionary words from the white-coated doctor; Tenten should rest, she shouldn't be taxed. But, to ask a parent, after days of worry, to wait a while longer to reach understanding was a futile waste of breath.

Neji stood, walked to the door, and hesitated. He glanced over his shoulder and Sasuke quickly contorted his features into a scowl, shaking his head with a warning look at the Hyuuga.

His only reaction was a smirk and a slight shrug as Neji turned back to the door, and Sasuke subsided helplessly back into his chair again to await the inevitable explosion.

* * *

The joy that lit Tenten's features - though tears-tracks marred her cheeks with a silken sheen - when Neji slowly pushed the door open and entered the hospital room, was enough to sicken Neji to his stomach. How could she be _happy _to see him? It made no logical sense whatsoever. But, then again, Neji had never really been able to understand why she wanted to be with him in the first place. Even now, after everything, the thought that she loved him was … alien … unbelievable.

Squaring his shoulders Neji allowed a small smile to appear as he tried with all his might to communicate everything he was feeling via his eyes. Tenten's smile faltered and Neji turned to her parents and the doctor who was staring at him in surprise.

"It was my fault," he told them boldly, without inflection.

Without giving anyone a chance to react he quickly recited his rehearsed speech, "I stole the alcohol from Itachi's party. I pressured Tenten and Sasuke into drinking it with me. We were drunk, and I said some things … did some things … we got into a fight … and Tenten fell, taking a table and a cut-glass vase with her. The glass shattered and that's how she cut her arm. I'm not sure how the police wound up thinking … what they thought but they were wrong. That is how it happened."

He finished firmly, strongly, and waited for the reaction.

* * *

Tenten stared at Neji in disbelief.

He was trying to take the blame, just as dream-Sasuke (it had been a dream, hadn't it) had said. The worst part was, he was doing a good job of convincing the adults of the truth of his 'confession'. Tenten gritted her teeth, hearing the enamel grind together with a grating sound that somehow underlined the anger coursing through her veins. She'd seen the shame, the regret, the apologies, in Neji's gaze and she understood him far better than he ever gave her credit for.

But he'd badly miscalculated if he thought she would let him take the fall for her stupidity.

She opened her mouth, was ready to refute his statement with heated, emotional words, but something in his gaze, when Neji's eyes flickered to hers for the smallest fraction of a millisecond, convinced her to close her mouth again. His eyes begged her to stay silent, to go along with this tale. It promised that everything would be alright if only she would go along with his version of the events…

As every time before, Tenten chose to believe in Neji.

To _trust_ in him.

* * *

The door creaked open as Neji pushed against it with one weary hand. It had been a long night. Emotions roiled just beneath his veneer of calm: wild happiness at Tenten's recovery, guilt at having caused her so much pain, fear that he would wind up hurting her even more than he already had and an aching sense of loneliness …

Why had Sasuke been the one to get through to her?

They'd all tried. But it had been the Uchiha who'd brought her back. In the deepest recesses of his mind Neji couldn't help but wonder if it meant that Tenten blamed him, that she'd realized that he'd done nothing but cause her pain; had only brought her darkness …

"Where have you been the last two days?"

His uncle's cold voice broke through the dark train of thought and Neji's spine involuntarily stiffened. His fists clenched and unclenched erratically – his body without his control – as he turned to face Hiashi. The emotionless mask on Hiashi's face, the studied indifference, was reflected on Neji's features; he knew that. But he couldn't stop the sudden anger from showing in his body language.

"Out," he finally replied, shortly, and turned his back to his uncle. The quicker this interview ended the better – emotion and Hyuuga Hiashi was a volatile combination and Neji's anger at himself was not far from erupting into full-blown violence.

"That's not good enough, Neji," Hiashi returned mildly, setting his newspaper down on the occasional table next to his armchair. He folded his arms across his chest and stared unrelentingly at his nephew's rigid back.

Neji could feel the gaze, could feel the force of his uncle's will drilling holes into his brain; into his resolution to get out before things could get ugly. He clenched his teeth, biting down on the inside of his cheek, hoping the slight sting would calm him.

"It doesn't matter. I'm going to bed."

"My patience grows thin, Neji. How long was the binge this time? Do you think that I'm too stupid to realize when you start using again? Every time we have this same conversation and yet, the next time, you seem to think that you'll be able to fool me into thinking you're clean."

Hiashi's voice was harsh, tinged with something like pain, but Neji couldn't see through the blinding, white-hot rage. He'd already reached the staircase, had one hand on the polished banister, and that hand was gripping the wood so hard that Neji was surprised the wood didn't splinter and crack. He fought desperately against the consuming flames; reached for calmness that eluded him over and over again. Deep, ragged breaths ripped through his tensed body and Neji could nearly feel the air around him crackling with the force of his anger.

Despite his resolve, despite his desperate lunges for sanity, Neji found himself slowly turning to face his uncle. Hiashi had moved; stood from the chair he'd been reading in, and had followed Neji to the foot of the stairs, pausing to regard his nephew from only a few feet away.

"This behavior is beneath you, Neji. I know that you are stronger than this. So, why continue to play with fire? Is it simply to humiliate me? You hurt no one but yourself."

The same derisive pain that coated Hiashi's voice whenever he spoke of his brother, covered his words now, and Neji drew in a sharp breath.

"Everything is not always about you, Uncle. In fact, nothing in my life is anything to do with you. You chose to take me in … if you don't like who and what I am … that's just too fucking bad because I really couldn't care less what you think."

The sarcastic words had flowed without thought and Neji stared at Hiashi barely even aware that he'd spoken at all.

"You're just like your father," Hiashi muttered from behind clenched teeth, his eyes narrowing as he glared at Neji with barely concealed anger.

The thought echoed so closely Neji's dream realizations that it was almost too much. Imagination flashed and in his mind's eye Neji pictured a scene much like this one; only Hizashi stood in his place, truculence pulling at his lips.

_The apple never falls far from the tree…_

Then it was just hysterically funny. Or maybe he was just really tired. Neji didn't know anymore, but his body sank down so he sat on the bottom stair, shaking with repressed mirth.

_You're just like your father …_

Yes, they certainly shared that knack for destroying those they loved …

Hazel brown eyes sparkling with happiness, rosy plump lips upturned in a joyful smile …

_Tenten._

She should always be happy; should never have any reason to cry. The mere thought of anyone being the cause of her tears had Neji ready to rip the offender limb from limb. But the irony was that there was only him in the ranks of those capable of bringing tears to her eyes …

Every fiber of his being yearned to make her smile; to be the one she would run to when tears threatened, but you couldn't seek comfort from the one responsible for your tears and Neji shook his head to clear it of impossible fantasies.

He pressed the heels of his hands against his burning eyes, aware of Hiashi staring at him in consternation; clearly fearing for his sanity, but the pain of loss bloomed bright red in Neji's chest and he could focus on nothing but the heartfelt vow to _never _hurt Tenten again.

For that, he would find the strength to give her up. To let her go.

Neji dropped his hands, raised his eyes to his uncle, knowing that Hiashi would be able to see the moisture filming his vision but no longer caring.

They stared at each other for an interminable moment, communication chasing wordlessly between them, and peace settled on Neji's soul as he saw that his uncle understood. And, threaded through that peace, came a ray of brightest hope, a soft voice filled with compassion whispered in his head.

_You can change. Become worthy of her…_

Slowly, Hiashi sighed, the puff of air stirring the web of emotion, blowing a small space into the darkness that clouded Neji's life, and reached out a hand for his nephew to take. Neji stared at the wordless offer of assistance and allowed that little whisper to gain strength; speak louder.

_You don't have to hurt her anymore. You can change._

Hesitantly, Neji raised his wet eyes to stare directly, strongly, into Hiashi's guarded gaze.

"Help me," he enunciated clearly into the space separating them and reached out to place his hand firmly in his uncle's grasp, allowing the older man to pull him to his feet.

"Help me."

Neji repeated the words, for once not cringing in shame, embracing the hope he felt. Hiashi nodded slowly and Neji ….

He believed.

* * *

_**A/N: So. We're getting somewhere now ^^ What did you think? Worth the time it took to read? Let me know – please review!**_


	25. Chapter 25

_**A/N: Thank you sososo much for the reviews/favs/alerts! Your support means a lot to me! I hope you all enjoy this chapter – though I do feel that it could've been better! ^^"**_

_**Warnings: Lemon, language, alcohol abuse … consider yourselves warned**_

_**Disclaimer: Yeah, right.**_

* * *

_**Chapter 25**_

Storm clouds had gathered, wild winds beat over defenceless tree-tops, lightning flashed periodically and deafening bouts of thunder seemed to rock the foundations of the earth. It seemed that even the weather was conspiring to keep them apart. And though Neji knew that it was probably for the best, he couldn't help but ignore all the signs that told him to keep his distance.

Even if he knew that Tenten would be better off forgetting about his existence entirely he couldn't simply leave – selfishly he couldn't help but want to leave some part of himself with her. Something that would ensure she would never forget … even if she only remembered in the deepest, loneliest hours of the night. Because he would carry her with him forever and though his head told him to let go of selfish hopes his heart wouldn't let him. Whether she'd meant to or not, Tenten had claimed a piece of his soul and the part of him that had so recently learned to hope wanted nothing more than to believe he'd been able to claim a part of her too.

The last week had been the worst, and yet the best, of his life. For the first time in many years Neji could hope for the future, could look beyond the here and now … the mess that was his life. He had a goal, something to look forward to. No matter how hopeless it was, no matter that he knew that he had to let go … he could hope.

For her he would change. Become better. And in his wildest dreams – in the darkest parts of the night, when the call of addiction was at its strongest – he allowed himself to believe that Tenten would wait for him, that she would be there once he was worthy of her. Of course, he knew that his hopes were illogical, he understood that no matter how he wished for it … it would never be and, in his more philosophical moments, he could rationalize that having had her in his life, in his arms, for however short a period of time … it was enough. And far more than he deserved.

The weather steadily worsened but the rain refused to fall. Much like the lump in his chest, it seemed as if the clouds couldn't bring themselves to open up and empty it all out.

Neji almost wished it would rain.

Far too soon he was in front of Tenten's door, hiding in the shadows of the porch as he had done so many times. But tonight he would not avail himself of the spare key under the mat. Darkness lay over the house, her parents' cars were absent but, this time … it had to be her choice to let him in. Slowly, Neji pulled his cellphone from his pocket, his fingers automatically dialling the familiar digits that made up Tenten's number. He let it ring twice, never bringing the device to his ear, and pressed the button to end the call with a certain finality and heavy dread dragging at his soul.

Everything had to end. It was a fact of life. No matter how you hid from it, tried to avoid it … there was no escaping it.

The door creaked open, a crack of light spilling out onto the darkened doorstep and Neji stepped forward, the symbolism of the small action – for once he was stepping towards Tenten shrouded in light – not lost on him. His mouth twisted into a wry grimace that he quickly smoothed out as he stepped over the threshold and closed the door behind him.

"I thought you weren't going to come," Tenten whispered, uncertainty painting her voice.

For a moment, Neji was silent as he took in the sight of her; dishevelled brown hair piled on her head in a loose bun with strands dripping down to caress her shoulders bared by a tight-fitting tank top. She twisted one bare leg behind the other, her foot rubbing up and down her calf in an unconsciously sensuous movement.

His heartbeat sped up, jagged shards pushing through his chest with each thump, and Neji couldn't have stopped himself from answering honestly if he wanted to.

"I almost didn't."

Wordlessly Tenten stepped closer, wound her arms around his neck and, standing on tip-toe, she buried her face in the hollow of his throat.

"I'm glad you did."

Her lips brushed against his skin, her breath following and, almost involuntarily, Neji's arms lifted to wrap around her slender frame; pulling her closer, tighter against him. But it was never close enough and he closed his eyes, rested his cheek on top of her sweet-smelling hair, and wished that he could melt into her.

Long moments passed as they stood in the entry way, wrapped up in each other but each hidden in their own thoughts. At last, Tenten stepped away, trailed a hand down his arm until their fingers tangled and she gave him a tremulous smile as she pulled him along in her wake, towards the stairs.

Every step brought them closer to the end, and Neji closed his eyes in silent pain, begging whatever higher power existed for the strength to make it through the night. His eyes opened again because he couldn't pass up any small moment spent drinking in her movements and he allowed his gaze to trace a path from the crown of her shining hair down to her toes; memorizing every inch, every dip, and every hollow of her body as she walked lightly up the stairs.

The silence should have been oppressive but somehow it was soothing; it seemed as if they existed, in this moment, outside of time and away from the world.

Her bedroom was lit with lamps only, the glow turning her chocolate eyes to unfathomable pools of liquid darkness as she turned to look at him expectantly when Neji drew to an abrupt halt just inside the bedroom door.

_Don't – don't hate me._

But the words stuck in his throat, the shards pressed a little deeper into his already bloody chest, and Neji reacted in the only way he knew how. He had to show her what she meant, everything he was feeling … but words wouldn't suffice, couldn't express the depth of what he wanted to convey, so he used the only tools available to him.

One hand lifted to cup her cheek, sliding softly along her blushing skin to bury in the fall of her hair as he caressed the nape of her neck. Tenten's eyes drifted closed, her lips opening slightly and Neji found himself unable to draw his gaze away from her glistening lips.

Slowly, carefully, he leaned forward until their lips met in a soft, chaste kiss. His head spun and the world seemed to grow a little darker; how was it possible that he'd forgotten what she felt like in only a week?

Tenten sighed, a trembling puff of air that fell almost silently onto his lips. Instinctively Neji's head angled, his mouth slanted over hers, and he drew a line over the seam of her lips with his tongue, asking for entrance, for permission to deepen the kiss. Her slight moan accompanied the parting of her lips, and Neji was barely aware of Tenten stepping closer, her fingers fisting in the fabric of his shirt, as her tongue danced delicately against his.

She was so soft, so warm … and his other hand settled unconsciously on her hip, drawing her tighter into his body. Her hands slid up, over his collarbone, and Neji suppressed the shudder that wanted to chase down his spine when her fingers drew light lines over his skin as her arms wound around his neck, and her hands threaded through his hair. She stood on tip-toe, pressing even closer, molding her body to his.

Bright lights danced behind his eyelids and Neji slowly slid his hand up from her hip, under the hem of her tank-top pushing the fabric higher so he could trace lingering patterns on the bared skin of her back.

_Soft … so soft … so breakable …_

The need to breathe overcame the urge to connect to her in some meaningful way, and Neji drew back reluctantly. Tenten's breathing was shallow, her eyes remained closed, and her uneven breaths heaved in her chest …

Slowly, her eyes opened, want burning with a clear flame in their melting depths …

"Please," she whispered, drawing his head down once more.

Neji gave in. Gave up. Admitted to himself that he'd never had a hope in hell of resisting her, resisting this. For all his noble intentions, his heart was clamouring in his chest, his breath hitching in his throat and, at that moment, he could focus on nothing but Tenten, her soft lips, her warm body, and the aching need in his own.

And, having admitted his own weakness, Neji allowed Tenten to draw him slowly back towards the bed. She sank back in a graceful movement and he followed. Her fingers fumbled with the buttons on his shirt and he let her until she lost patience with the whole thing and simply dragged the offending article of clothing over his head.

His head fell back against the pillows and he fought against the sounds of pleasure that wanted to escape his throat as her teeth scraped over his jugular, her lips and tongue tracing a teasing path down his chest. But it wasn't enough – pleasurable as her touch was he had to know she was real; not part of another fevered dream.

He forced his eyes open, pushed past the expectant tensing of his muscles, and took back control. Flipped her over onto her back and attacked the scant pieces of clothing that hid her body from his gaze and his touch because suddenly any barrier between them was just too much to bear.

His hands swept up and down her bared skin, making her arch her back; cry out into the semi-darkness, her voice lost in the pleasure that masked his senses. Neji pressed his mouth against hers again, biting, sucking at her lips, as his hands wandered slowly over her body; searching for every piece of flesh that would heighten the sensations.

The smooth skin that stretched over her rib-cage gave way to the soft swelling of her breasts and Tenten threw her head back against the pillow as Neji caressed softly before cupping and kneading lightly. Her mouth opened in a silent moan and her back arched and Neji couldn't resist the invitation to touch further. He pressed soft, open-mouthed kisses along her skin and suddenly the haze that had enveloped him receded and he focused on the sounds of pleasure Tenten was making as he explored his way down her body. So familiar, the taste and texture of her skin, and yet so alien…

_Don't forget me. Please, Tenten._

Tenten quivered under him, her body shaking and shuddering as breathless pleas fell from kiss-swollen lips and when his fingers dipped into the wetness of her body only to withdraw again in a teasing caress, she opened her eyes.

"Please…"

Her whisper brushed over his lips as she reached up and pulled his mouth down to hers in a desperate kiss of teeth and tongue. Tenten reached between them, began to fumble with the button on his jeans and Neji couldn't keep the tension from manifesting in his limbs. Time seemed to alternately speed up and slow down with no rhyme or rhythm as they struggled to remove the last pieces of clothing.

Finally, Tenten wrapped her legs around his bared hips and ground against him in a wordless appeal; Neji pulled back slightly and stared into her passion-glazed eyes. She stared questioningly up at him but he merely leant down and brushed another slow-burning kiss over her mouth as he pushed slowly into her body.

_Don't forget me, Tenten._

She cried out, his name a breathless moan, as Neji slowly began to move, pushing deeper with every thrust. He reached for her hands, tangled their fingers together in the vain hope that the contact would anchor him but the pleasure was too much, too overwhelming, and Neji forgot about everything except the softness, the warmth, the feel of their bodies moving together in perfect synch. Despite his intentions, despite his plans, Neji couldn't control his body – couldn't keep from speeding up. Harder, faster, deeper…

But always soft, always gentle. Every fiber of his being ached to meld with hers, every movement was meant to show her … let her know …

The end was near, Neji could feel it creeping up on him like black death hovering at his shoulder. Tenten's body shuddered around him, her scream muffled by his mouth on hers and, as Neji followed her over the edge; spilled himself deep into her with erratic thrusts, the clouds opened and it began to rain.

_I love you. Forever … wait for me …_

* * *

He made sure that Tenten was asleep, the blankets pulled up carefully around her before he stole silently from her room hours later. It had taken every bit of willpower he possessed to slide from between the warm sheets, to pull his cold clothes back into place, to press a last kiss to her hair, her forehead, her eyelids, her nose and finally her lips.

Tenten had stirred sluggishly, buried her face in the pillow, a slight smile on her lips as she mumbled his name and Neji had hoped, with every particle of his being, that the Neji of her dreams was doing his utmost to make her happy, unlike his counterpart in reality.

Finally, he'd been able to delay the moment of his leaving no longer and he'd quickly turned and left before the sight of her destroyed everything he'd struggled to build in the last week. No matter the pain to himself, it would be better for her. _He _would be better for her. And he would forever be thankful that Hiashi had allowed him this reprieve, had given in to his demand of making sure Tenten was safe before he left …

Neji smiled bitterly as he threw the car into reverse and backed carefully out of Tenten's driveway, for the last time. How long it would be before he could return – if he could return at all – he didn't know but he studiously ignored the sharp shards in his chest as he drove carefully towards the cemetery.

His uncle had given him this week – had arranged everything so that he could say his goodbyes – because the one thing that Neji was absolutely sure of was that this would be the last time that he would leave Konoha in this state. This time he would try, this time he would succeed …

The phone lying on the passenger seat buzzed to alert him to an incoming call but a side-ways glance at the screen told Neji that it was only his uncle and he decided that his uncle could wait a while longer. He would be in time, he'd given his word, this time he had something to fight for and come morning he would be in his assigned place; Hiashi was worrying needlessly.

The cemetery was deserted but instead of feeling unease at being surrounded by the dark graves Neji welcomed the peace of the place. After all he was walking dead already, wasn't he? But still he needed the liquid courage that alcohol could bring so he reached beneath the seat to the bottle of vodka he'd stashed there earlier and, a few swigs later, Neji finally felt able to step out of the car and face his last goodbye.

His phone buzzed in his pocket but he ignored it as he made his way, still clutching the bottle like a life-line, through the lines towards his mother's grave.

He stood there for a long time in silence, unsure of what to say, of where to begin…

"I-I'm … sorry," he whispered at last, gaze fixed firmly on the cold headstone, aware of the inadequacy of his apology but feeling, somehow, that his mother understood.

Slowly, Neji sank to the damp grass, his elbows resting on his bent knees and, as the level of liquid in the bottle slowly fell, he simply sat; enjoyed the presence of peace that came with laying your demons to rest.

It was hours later when he registered the presence behind him.

_Am I that drunk?_ He wondered hazily but in the end he didn't really care who had come to disturb his peace and Neji merely waited in silence for them to make the first move.

"You're a fucking idiot, Hyuuga. And your uncle has been looking for you for the last four hours."

Sasuke's tone was dry as he lowered himself to sit next to Neji on the damp grass and reached for the bottle resting against Neji's knee. Sasuke took a reflective sip from the nearly empty bottle and let it dangle from his fingers as he crossed his arms over his knees.

"What are you doing out here at this time of night? Do you want to be killed?"

Again, Sasuke's tone was conversational almost but Neji could feel the faint stirrings of resentment below the alcohol induced haze.

"What's it to you if I get killed or not?"

The Uchiha sighed, dark bangs falling forward to hide his eyes, "I never wanted you dead. You're the only one who seems to want that."

Resentment flared into rage and Neji fought to still the trembling of his hands as he stared at the ground in front of him; his voice low.

"Fuck you. What gives you the right to preach? Don't you think I know I'm self-destructive?"

"I think you won't rest until everything around you is in flames."

Silence descended after Sasuke's simple pronouncement and Neji could feel the rage flowing away as if it had never been. For a long moment they sat in increasingly companionable silence before Neji cleared his throat.

"I'm going. And I need to know that Tenten will be safe."

He kept his tone purposefully even, at the moment Sasuke held all of the advantage.

Slowly Sasuke raised his head, tilted it back and stared at the stars.

"Rehab, huh? Yeah. She'll be fine."

Neji allowed the relief to flow through him at the Uchiha's words, and knew that, finally, everything was settled and there was nothing left for him to do here.

"Sasuke. Why are you here?" he asked slowly, suddenly aware of how slurred his words sounded.

"Because whatever we became, we used to be better than this."

Sasuke stood and held a hand out to Neji.

"Let's go. I got Itachi to drop me off – no one else seemed to think that you might be here … I'll drive you back."

Carefully Neji reached out and clasped Sasuke's wrist, allowing the other to pull him to his feet.

No further words were spoken that night – not as Sasuke drove slowly toward the Hyuuga manor, not as he handed a half-passed out Neji over to his uncle, not as he waited for dawn to break and Itachi to fetch him on his way to class.

No words were needed. It might only shatter the thin sheet of glass that encased and protected their wary truce.

As Neji drifted off into sleep – he could feel his uncle's anger but that was alright – he couldn't help but smirk slightly to himself. They might never be friends; not the way they used to be when they were younger but, ironically enough, he felt satisfied with the knowledge that Sasuke would keep an eye on Tenten while he was gone.

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_**A/N: This chapter makes my heart hurt. Sooooo … what did you think? Worth a review? ^^**_


	26. Chapter 26

_**A/N: Nearly a month –wails- I'm sorry! But the festive season is over now and it's back to normal so the chapters should be quicker in coming. Thank you sososo much to everyone for reading/reviewing/alerting/favourite-ing – you make my day, really you do. Feedback from you guys is what makes me want to share what I've written – so please don't be shy and remember to review!**_

_**Warnings: A little smuttiness, a little language … nothing unusual**_

_**Disclaimer: It would really suck very much to get sued, so even though you're all well aware: I do not own Naruto or the characters used in this story.  
**_

* * *

_**Chapter 26**_

Tenten snuggled deeper into the soft pillows, an equally soft smile pulling at the corners of her mouth, but even through the bliss of sleep she was aware of the yawning coldness of the space at her back. The smile turned into a slight frown as she fought her way up through layers of sleep; trying to place the feeling of coldness. It shouldn't be cold … Neji was always so warm …

Her eyes flew open as the realization hit and for a moment she remained frozen in place as she registered the facts the coldness communicated to her: Neji was gone, had been for quite some time. Slowly the events of the night before filtered back into her conscious mind; how Neji had seemed closed off, reluctant, but at the same time yearning and desperate …

_Why had it felt so much like goodbye?_

Fear clawed at her insides and tears burned beneath her lids as she closed her eyes against the pain; she'd foolishly allowed herself to hope that everything would be alright when Neji's arms had closed around her. She'd allowed herself to forget all the problems, all the things that still stood between them, in the heat of the moment, and she'd hoped that Neji would do the same. Rationality tried to inject some sense into her pain-filled thoughts but it was useless – Neji would never leave her room without saying goodbye, the mere fact that he clearly _had _was proof enough that something was horribly wrong.

Slowly, Tenten turned onto her back, her head turning involuntarily and her eyes filling with tears as she stared at the empty space in the bed. The pillow was still indented where Neji's head had been, the sheets pushed back, the pale white of the envelope striking against the blue fabric …

Tenten blinked vigorously to keep the tears at bay as she slowly reached for the square of paper. It was blank, there was nothing threatening about it but her heart pounded in her chest. Painfully she pushed herself up against the headboard, still clutching the envelope tightly in one hand. The other rose to push her bangs out of her eyes and she took a deep breath before opening the flap and pulling the sheet of plain paper out of its casing.

Long moments passed as she stared disbelievingly at the words he'd written. Her hands shook and her fingers clenched tightly around the paper but she barely registered the protesting crackle. Anger began to stir, bubbled slowly, evaporating the tears before they'd formed until Tenten realized, distantly and with some surprise, that she was furious.

Smooth movements were fuelled by anger as she pushed the covers back and flew around the room. This time she would not stay silent and simply accept whatever happened.

This time she wanted answers.

And the Uchiha would damn well give them to her.

* * *

Sasuke sighed tiredly as he opened his locker door and took a couple of books from the pile stacked neatly inside. The night had been long, his talk with Itachi in the car this morning even longer. But it had been too late to regret going after the Hyuuga; he'd been expecting some kind of speech from his brother for the last week anyway, so he'd resigned himself to listening in silence. What he hadn't expected was for Itachi to coolly inform him that he would be attending a rehab program with a local psychologist from the next week.

Telling a stranger about the inner workings of his mind? Allowing someone to rummage through his memories, his actions, at will – let them judge him? Sasuke nearly groaned out loud. He'd go, of course he'd go, what choice did he have? But already he dreaded it. Part of him was grateful that Itachi had taken matters into his own hands so that Sasuke had been spared the humiliation of a confession. Itachi was his brother, he loved him, but Sasuke had no desire to bare his soul to his older brother. The elder Uchiha was too much like their father for Sasuke to easily show any weakness in his presence. But the other part, the part that was so used to doing exactly as he pleased, that part was not happy with the ultimatum Itachi had laid down at all. Oh, Itachi had phrased it as if Sasuke had a choice, but no choice had been involved really – he had no desire to be handed over to the courts as a misbehaving juvenile and sent to some government rehabilitation center; and Sasuke knew Itachi well enough to know that his brother could be exactly as bad as his word.

He was so caught up in his thoughts he never noticed the girl stalking towards him, murder in eyes and vengeance in her heart. He failed to notice the stares the other students gave Tenten as she marched up to him, failed to notice the wary looks he was getting. He had no warning; just Tenten's hand reaching for the locker door, slamming it shut right in front of him. Sasuke barely got his hands out of the way fast enough. For a moment disbelief held him in place, he stared straight ahead at the dull metal door but anger rushed in swiftly on its heels.

_Who would dare…? _

Slowly Sasuke turned to face whatever person had been foolish enough to fuck with him today of all days. The occasional jealous boyfriend would try to challenge him in some macho display but one glare was usually enough to send them quickly on their way. But today he was disinclined to be merciful; today whoever crossed his path would get exactly what they deserved … The glare faded, the red flames in the dark irises died down, when Sasuke turned fully and saw Tenten standing next to him, vibrating with fury.

They stared – glared – at each other in silence for a moment before Sasuke sighed almost imperceptibly and said wearily, "Tenten." Unfortunately this was one confrontation he couldn't avoid. Absurdly he wanted to laugh; only now it occurred to him that the Hyuuga had conveniently left him to do the explaining to the irate girl in front of him.

_Typical._

"What the _hell _is this?" Tenten snarled, slamming a sheet of paper into his chest, uncaring of their avid audience.

Mildly interested Sasuke took the piece of paper from her, quickly scanned the words written there in the Hyuuga's elegant script.

_I don't want to hurt you anymore than I already have. I hope you will move on to happier things. I go now with the hope that you will one day be able to forgive me for all the pain I've caused you. _

Mirthlessly Sasuke smirked as he closed his eyes briefly, cursing the Hyuuga for leaving him with this mess.

"Ah … yes-″

Sasuke never got to finish his sentence as Tenten opened her mouth and beat him to it.

"Go? What does he mean _go_? Go _where_, exactly? What did you do to him?"

"Tenten-″

"What did you _do_?" her voice escalated to a scream, the sheen of tears obvious in her eyes, "we were fine. We were. And now he's suddenly got to go?" she stopped to take a deep breath, staring accusingly at the raven-haired boy in front of her.

"Tenten," Sasuke began, quietly, his hands going to her shoulders; he could feel her body trembling in his hold and his hands tightened as it became apparent that he had to get her out of the public eye and quickly; Tenten wasn't too far from her breaking point. But that was exactly the wrong thing to do, it seemed, as she twisted violently in his hold.

Glaring up at him she pushed, hands flat on his chest as she put all her strength behind the movement. Sasuke smirked – she'd have to do better than that - but Tenten repeated the motion, again and again, until he was forced to hold her shoulders tightly as he tried to keep her body away from his. Her palms slammed into him again and again, with increasing force as Sasuke stared in astonishment. Tears were streaming down her face, her eyes burned with rage.

"Stop that and calm the fuck down," he hissed at her, his own brows drawing together in a scowl as he fought against the girl who seemed intent on putting as many bruises as she could on him.

"What did you do? What did you say?" her voice escalated with every word and her hands balled into fists as she tried to slam them into every inch of him she could reach.

Recognizing the hysterical light burning in her eyes Sasuke acted as quickly as he could without hurting her. His grip tightened, slid down to capture her flailing wrists in a strong grasp as he quickly turned her around, and pressed her crossed wrists against her chest, holding her tightly against him to stop the frantic twisting of her body.

For a moment longer Tenten struggled against his hold before he body slumped and she allowed him to draw her quickly toward the first door he could see. The silence in the hallway was almost deafening but Sasuke ignored the onlookers as he released Tenten with a muttered order to stand still. He pushed her through before him and closed the door on the wide-eyed stares.

"He's gone to a rehab center," he stated emotionlessly into the space ahead of him, not paying any mind to Tenten who had sunk to the floor as soon as she'd drawn to a stumbling halt.

"What…?" she whispered, confusion coloring her voice as she shook her head slowly in denial.

"He left with his uncle early this morning, and the letter is his way of telling you not to wait for him."

Her shoulders began to shake and Sasuke carefully fixed his gaze on the opposite wall; he had no desire or talent to deal with her tears. But he'd made a promise and his mouth twisted into a grimace. Quietly he cleared his throat.

"He left _for_ you, Tenten. Because he wants to change."

It was all Sasuke could manage – the full extent of emotion he had in him at the moment. He was suddenly absolutely exhausted, but as he turned back to the door he said quietly, "I saw Temari out there, I'll tell her you're here."

He quickly slipped out of the room, eyes searching for the blonde. He wanted to get the entire uncomfortable thing over with as quickly as possible. Temari was waiting just across the hall, her arms crossed tightly over her chest, a scowl firmly in place.

"What did you do to her?" she demanded, the moment he stopped in front of her.

"Nothing," Sasuke muttered running a tired hand over his face. "Look, Neji left this morning and she's upset. So go help her or something."

Temari stared warily at him, "Just stay away from her," her voice was a hiss at the end of the sentence and she reminded Sasuke of a cat; its fur standing on end. She pushed past him but stopped abruptly as Sasuke spoke quietly.

"I can't do that – I told Neji I'd check that she's okay."

The blond hair swung slowly as Temari shook her head, "I'm not even going to bother trying to understand, Uchiha. Just leave her alone."

And then she was gone and Sasuke sighed again. What had seemed like such an easy thing to promise at the time had quickly become more trouble than he ever would've believed.

* * *

Hours later Sasuke let himself tiredly into his house. He was so goddamned tired – what had compelled him to stay at school all day he really couldn't understand. But he had stayed. He'd even tried to take notes in a couple of classes. Now all he wanted was his bed. He dropped his bag in the entryway, kicked his shoes off at the foot of the stairs, and slowly began the ascent to his bedroom.

Despite the tiredness, despite being emotionally numbed, Sasuke couldn't help but feel a flicker of pride. For the first time in years he'd passed through a day he didn't regret. Of course, he could've been nicer to Tenten, his conscience twinged a bit, but he'd done the best he could and that would have to suffice.

The door to his bedroom swung open as he pushed it and the flash of pink he caught from the corner of his eye made his lifting spirits sink a bit. Sakura was sitting in the middle of his bed, staring at the TV on his wall, the sound off, but at his entry she hit the button on the remote and the screen went blank. For a moment Sasuke stared at the dark screen before he entered the room fully and closed the door behind him.

"So, this is where you were all day." The words were a statement; his tone flat.

Sakura nodded her affirmation, pink hair shining silkily in the rapidly fading light but Sasuke forced himself to ignore the way the light shone off the strands. She leaned back against the headboard waiting in silence as Sasuke pulled his shirt over his head and collapsed on his stomach on the bed. He couldn't help the groan that escaped as he finally allowed his tired body to relax.

The silence was blissful but at the back of his mind Sasuke was aware that it was too good to last. The soft sounds of Sakura's voice broke the stillness moments later and Sasuke nearly groaned again.

"So. Were you just waiting for Neji to be out of the picture before moving in on Tenten again or were you sharing her from the beginning in some kind of weird-ass mind-fuck arrangement?"

Her voice was calm but Sasuke could hear the undertones of anger lurking there; could pick up on the small signs of jealousy. He smirked into the pillow.

"What does it matter, Sakura?" he asked softly, shifting so he could lie on his back. He folded his arms behind his head and stared at the ceiling as he waited for her response.

"I was under the impression that I was doing this so that you would leave her alone," Sakura's voice had taken a distinctive turn towards sarcastic and Sasuke had to force himself not to react, "you were supposed to back off, Sasuke. I kept my side of the deal – you didn't."

A dismissive snort was the only reaction he allowed himself and he could feel the way tension vibrated through the girl next to him. A fluid movement he caught at the corners of his vision was the only warning he got and the next thing Sasuke knew Sakura was straddling his waist, hovering above him on her knees as she glared down at him.

"Tell me, Sasuke, what are you planning?" her eyes narrowed, became cat-like green slits as she stared down at him with a calculating expression on her face. Sasuke could almost hear the wheels turning in her head.

His hands settled instinctively, familiarly, on her hips and without warning Sasuke flipped her over. Sakura's eyes widened as she stared up at him and Sasuke allowed the smirk to pull the corners of his mouth up as he leaned forward and brushed his lips lightly against hers.

"Pass. But let me answer your other questions: why did you honor your side of the bargain when you should've expected that I wouldn't honor mine? You should know me better than that, Sakura. Next one, what was I doing with Tenten then if I was honoring my side of the deal? It involves the small matter of a promise made to her boyfriend. Where is said boyfriend? Rehab. And, finally … and this is the big one, why did you risk everything, your relationship with Sai included, to keep me away from the happy couple?"

His eyes were piercing as he drew back to look seriously down at her.

"You did it because you wanted to. Wanted _me_. You can deny it but it doesn't change the truth. You weren't just spreading your legs and thinking of your country, Sakura. You wanted it as much as I did." The last words were punctuated with a harsh kiss as he forced her mouth to open beneath his.

At first Sakura resisted the persuasiveness of his lips on hers; tried to ignore the insistent feel of his hands on her body but he nipped at her bottom lip and her mouth opened in a gasp and then she was lost. His tongue immediately swept out, tangled silkily with hers and she arched her back, pressing closer to him with a slight moan.

Sasuke marvelled at the fact that all the tiredness seemed to have disappeared from his body; all that mattered was Sakura, the way she felt, the way she tasted; her warmth as she wrapped her legs around his hips and ground sensuously into him. He traced the contours of her frame with gentle hands, pushing the fabric of her shirt up and over her head and wondered at the fact that the more things changed the more they stayed the same; even with their current arrangement in place, sex in exchange for silence, he still found himself worshipping every curve of her lithe body.

The flickering of fire quickly burned out of control and with a sharp thrust of his hips Sasuke slid into her, his eyes closing as hers flew open. He stayed perfectly still for a few moments, giving her time to adjust, but as they began to move something in the act seemed different. How many times had he been with Sakura like this? Buried so deeply inside her that he couldn't tell where she ended and he began … how often had he held her like this as she muffled her cries of pleasure against his skin? But this time, something had changed. Something inside him had torn loose from its moorings and now floated to the forefront of his mind. Those three little words pushed against his throat, begging to be uttered but they were blocked by the words already lodged there, words he'd resolved weeks ago to say, only to find that he couldn't. And now, finally, he understood why. Much as he wanted to think that Sakura had agreed to this because she wanted him he couldn't help the uncertainty that lurked in the back of his mind: what if she didn't? What if she really was doing this to help her friend? What if she closed her eyes and pretended that it was Sai's mouth on hers, Sai's hands trailing down her body …?

_I'm sorry … for everything_

Regret pounded through him with every frantic beat of his heart but still, Sasuke couldn't bring himself to say those words, much as he knew Sakura deserved to hear them.

She writhed beneath him, her mouth open in a silent moan, her hands sliding down his back, her nails digging into his skin …

_I never stopped … loving you_

They were there. So close. But Sasuke closed his eyes so he wouldn't have to see the way Sakura's face twisted in pleasure, so he wouldn't have to torture himself with the idea that she was seeing Sai's face behind her closed lids.

Here in the darkness of his own thoughts there was only the soft, wet, grasp of her body, the silkiness of her skin sliding against his, the urgency of her lips against his mouth. Here in the darkness he could lose himself to the ecstasy, could hold her close as the waves washed over them both and their bodies bowed into each other, clinging and locking as if they never meant to let go. Wildly, Sasuke couldn't help but wonder if the two of them would ever be _able _to let go … but Sakura screamed his name and his eyes opened despite himself, he forced the words he wanted so badly to say to the back of his mind, allowed only the groan of pleasure that accompanied his release to spill from his lips as he buried his face in the hollow of her throat and rode the last racking waves of completion to their end.

For a long time they remained like that, Sakura's hands trailing softly through his hair, over his back, as he struggled to regain his breath but the sweet lethargy that pervaded his being dissipated quickly when she spoke.

"You were right, Sasuke. I'm here with you because I want to be – because there's nowhere else I'd rather be. But don't try to tell me you don't feel it too. I'm not the girl I used to be – I'm not so naïve that I simply accept whatever you say or do without argument. I know the difference now, and this time I won't settle for what you feel like giving. I'm yours. If you want me. But you have to claim that right. I love you and I'm not afraid to admit it," her laugh was bitter and at her light push Sasuke rolled over onto his back, throwing an arm over his eyes so he wouldn't have to looking into those earnest emerald depths, "it doesn't do me any good to try to pretend I don't. But I won't go back to the way things were before, Sasuke. I can't be with you if you don't love me back."

* * *

Tenten stared at the moonlight that played softly over the walls of her bedroom. After Temari had dragged her from the classroom she'd fled. She just couldn't face school, couldn't face Sasuke, couldn't face Temari … all she wanted was Neji. She needed so badly to feel his arms close around her, his lips brushing the top of her head in a comforting gesture … but Neji was gone and no amount of wishing would bring him back.

Throughout the day, as the emotions raged out of control, Tenten had battled her anger at him. Unreasonable as it was she couldn't help but blame him, for leaving. Didn't he understand by now that nothing hurt as much as being without him? But after hours of thinking, thinking so much that she was numb from it, Tenten finally allowed the cool fingers of logic to spread soothingly over her tangled emotions.

Sasuke seemed to think that Neji had left for her – to change for her. But Neji's note very clearly told her to move on. With a sigh Tenten rolled onto her back and pushed her hands into her tangled hair. What if Neji thought she would abandon him eventually anyway and thus decided to make it easier for her by telling her that it was okay? No matter what Sasuke or the note said in her gut Tenten knew that Neji loved her. That knowledge was a part of her, it flowed in her veins with her blood, pumped with her heart, wove through the other thoughts in her brain …

Her mouth firmed as she sat up in bed, the covers falling off and pooling around her in dark shadows. She reached over and snapped the bedside lamp on, blinking against the brightness of the light, as she reached into the cabinet for a pen and paper. If he thought she'd let him go, let _them _go, that easily then Neji would have to think again…

She leaned back against the headboard and bit the end of the pen in thought before placing the ball-point against the paper and with a smooth motion began to write.

_Dear Neji…_

* * *

Neji woke slowly, disoriented, confusion pulling at his mind. This did not feel like his bed, he did not feel hung-over or as if on a crash, the warmth of Tenten was conspicuously absent and the emptiness that realization brought was almost too much to bear.

Slowly, his conscious mind began to piece it together: he was in the rehab center, had been for nearly a week. The worst of the withdrawal symptoms had long since passed but every day was a battle. He hadn't known how hard it would be without Tenten. The previous times he'd been inside places like these he'd never had anything he wanted as badly on the outside; there hadn't been anything he wanted more than the drugs. The problem was that as much as he was fighting to kick the drug habit, missing Tenten made him crave the highs more than ever and sometimes Neji wasn't sure if he was fighting his drug addiction or his Tenten addiction anymore.

He hated that he hadn't been able to say goodbye properly, hated that he'd taken the coward's way and left her a note … but he'd been so afraid. Afraid that one look from her would crumble his resolve because there was nowhere he'd rather be than with Tenten.

Every day in this place seemed like a century. He craved her. Her touch, her mouth, her voice, her laughter … and that was what spurred him on. Maybe, just maybe, he could get to hear her laugh again if he could make his time here count. So every day passed with Neji firmly reminding himself of his goals and his hopes.

He'd written her that damn note well aware that he had to let her move on but reluctant to do so. In the end he'd compromised, he'd told her to move on but added the hint that he hoped to be part of her future. The first few days he'd done nothing but pray that she'd caught on to that, that she didn't feel he'd abandoned her. And he'd cursed himself for the need to trust the Uchiha. Here, far away from her, he could do nothing but hope – hope that she loved him, hope that she waited for him, hope that the Uchiha would take care of her …

The previous morning had dawned like any other; he'd had breakfast and a solo session with his shrink. He's spent the rest of the morning working on school assignments - Hiashi had somehow arranged something with the school - and the day had seemed like any other. Routine became normal so quickly in these places…

But after the group session in the afternoon one of the nursing staff had handed him a thick envelope much to Neji's confusion. No one knew where he was, save for his family, and he doubted his uncle had that much to say to him after barely a week apart. He'd clutched the paper like a life-line nonetheless; it was a reminder that there was more to him than this place, more than a messed-up life and regret upon regret …

Alone in his room at last, Neji had opened the envelope with trembling fingers and unfolded the pages; he hadn't allowed himself to believe what the writing on the envelope suggested but it was only with the re-reading of the first few lines that he'd begun to believe …

_Dear Neji_

_You're an idiot. And I'm so angry at you right now I could kill you. But I miss you too much for the anger to really take hold. Sasuke told me. About rehab. And I'm glad that you're getting your life on track, I really am. I just can't see why you thought you had to do that without me. You hope that I will 'move on to happier things' huh? Sasuke says it's your way of telling me to move on but I'm sorry, Neji, I can't do that. I will wait for you – for however long it takes. Because I love you and I always will. No pain can be greater than the pain of being without you. So I'll wait – whether you want me to or not. And when you come back I'm going to kick your ass for not saying goodbye properly. Learn to have a little faith in me while you're there, hmm…_

He could almost imagine her wry smile as she wrote that and Neji found himself smirking involuntarily before he'd gone on to read the rest of her letter. It was filled with little stories, her thoughts, her ideas … an entire week's worth of snippets from her life.

Now Neji leaned over and pulled the letter from between the pages of a book where he'd stuck it before going to bed the night before. Carefully he turned to the last page, angled the paper so the moonlight that spilled through the window illuminated the last few lines of her letter.

…_I miss you. I love you. Get better soon, I can't sleep properly if you're not here._

His eyes lingered on her signature for a long time.

_Tenten._

_**

* * *

**_

A/N: Penultimate chapter … that alone makes me want to cry! Again, the wind-down of this story is just so emotion-filled … I'm really sorry that I'm having such a hard time reflecting that properly ^^" I hope you liked the chapter … and if you didn't … well, I totally understand! But I'd love to hear your thoughts on it so please review! ^^


	27. Chapter 27

_**A/n: Omg, I cannot believe that we're on the last chapter –cries and cries- but thank you sooooo much to everyone for reviewing/alerting/fav-ing throughout! I couldn't have gotten this far without your support and encouragement and I'm really glad that so many of you enjoyed the story! I hope that you'll like the final chapter too ^^ - please review and let me know!**_

_**Warnings: Mostly language in this one**_

_**Dedication: To Valkyrie Mist: for her pseudo-beta-ing of the chapter, for her incredible strokes of brilliance that helped me through the tough spots in this story, for her unfailing support and encouragement and also just because she's awesome! Go check out her profile … I fell in hearts with her story: A Leaf in the Sand!**_

_**Disclaimer: Sadly, Kishi-sama owns, not me  
**_

* * *

_**Chapter 27**_

There were so many people; too many - all rushing madly back and forth with manic expressions on their faces. Vaguely Sasuke wondered what it was about a shopping mall that turned usually normal people into crazed beings focused solely on getting what they wanted; that bowled people over in their rush to get to the next store without an apology. God, he hated malls. And he hated shopping. But shoes were something he couldn't go without; his favorite pair of Converses was falling apart and he absolutely refused to walk around in dress shoes. All of which led him to the mall on a Saturday morning, facing the madness, as people rushed from one store to the next.

Sasuke sighed deeply as he shoved his hands deeper into the pockets of his jeans and tried to avoid another group of people that suddenly swerved into his path. If he was lucky he could be in and out in a few minutes at most … he firmly ignored the speculative glances he received from girls grouped around store entrances; pretended not to hear the high-pitched giggles, acted as if he couldn't feel the eyes fixed on his retreating back as he quickly pushed through the people in front of him in a bid to get away before the braver ones approached him.

Mentally he slapped himself for thinking that stopping off at the mall on his way home from his usual Saturday therapy session was a good idea. It was all Itachi's fault, he reflected bitterly, if it hadn't been for his brother and his ridiculous ultimatums Sasuke wouldn't have been forced to attend therapy sessions and would, therefore, not have been anywhere near a mall on a Saturday morning. He also wouldn't have had to listen to the stupid woman gushing about his anti-social tendencies and abandonment issues, his simultaneous inferiority-superiority complex (what the fuck did she know anyway?); wouldn't have to face her blushing face as she tried to coax him into talking. Sasuke rather suspected that she thought she could _save_ him but he kept his mouth shut around Itachi; let the bastard think that he was actually gaining something from the sessions – at least it kept him from an actual shrink who wouldn't allow him to get away with saying nothing as often as possible.

Despite what Itachi thought, Sasuke had never been as bad as Neji; not even at his worst had he ever gotten in so far over his head that he couldn't drag himself out again. Not that it was easy for Sasuke, no, it wasn't easy at all …but he could do it on his own and the part of him that was still humiliated at being treated like a crack-head couldn't help but wish that his older brother could be far-sighted enough to realize it. But Itachi was doing an admirable job of ignoring him and there was no way in hell that Sasuke would tell ever tell him that. So, the state of affairs had dragged on; week after week of Saturday mornings wasted …

His thoughts abruptly cut off and fell into limp disarray, like a length of string that had been treated to the sharp snip of a pair of scissors, and Sasuke stopped dead as the crowd surged around him, grumbling in his direction. Sakura was just exiting an ice-cream shop a little ahead of him; she had that contented, dreamy look in her eyes that she got after a generous scoop of her favorite chocolate-chip ice-cream …She'd barely ventured two steps from the entrance before she turned and waited, staring at the entrance, dreamy smile still in place.

_Please let her be here with Ino … please don't be here with …_

Sasuke's somewhat chaotic thoughts were cut off abruptly as it became apparent that Sakura had indeed been waiting for Sai to exit the store. The other boy had a look of smug satisfaction on his face as he accepted Sakura's delighted smile and wound a casual arm around her waist and led her off into the crowd.

_Goddamn smug, self-righteous … she looks that way every time I so much as touch her _arm_ - no ice-cream bribes necessary …_

Someone bumped into his shoulder and the force of the push galvanized Sasuke into action. A few long, quick strides brought him level with the service hallway and he quickly ducked out of the stream of people. Leaning back against the cool wall of tiles, he closed his eyes and allowed the dimmer light to soothe him; he forced the still-snarling little voice, that had spoken from nowhere, to the back of his mind and took a few deep breaths.

_What the fuck is wrong with you, Uchiha. Get it together. So what if he bought her a stupid ice-cream cone? He's allowed to._

But the little voice refused to be suppressed; just when Sasuke thought cool logic had the upper hand, it piped up again.

_You're not allowed to._

Startled, body tensing, Sasuke opened his eyes and examined the thought. So what if he wasn't in any position to buy her anything? So what if he couldn't stroll through a mall, his arm around her; showing the world whom she belonged to … who wanted that kind of thing anyway? It didn't matter to him; he had less than no desire to trail after her from store to store – he still recalled the shopping excursions of years before with a pained grimace, after all. Let Sai be the stupid prick that carried her shopping bags … There were more than enough willing and warm bodies that would keep the demons at bay during the night.

_Is that enough?_

Sasuke shook his head vigorously in the hope that the action would dislodge the stupid voice once and for all.

Of course it was enough.

What else was there?

* * *

Sakura grinned up at Sai as she held the shirt against herself and waited for his opinion. He flashed her an insincere smile and offered a shrug and, with a sigh, she replaced the shirt. He was even worse than Sasuke when it came to shopping sprees; at least Sasuke glared outright, swore at everything in sight, and didn't try to pretend that he didn't mind shopping. She shook her head slightly, what the hell was wrong with her? Of course it would be preferable to have a boyfriend who made an effort …

But the problem was that, if given a choice, she would take one of Sasuke's glares over a hundred of Sai's smiles any day …

The guilt flashed – quick and heated – and she forced herself to return Sai's smile. She grabbed his hand, twining her fingers through his; perhaps in an effort to alleviate the guilt? She tugged his hand, ignoring his surprised look, and quickly headed for the exit.

It wasn't Sai's fault. Though he could be blunt to a fault, and socially inept to boot, he tried. And that had to count for something. He treated her far better than Sasuke ever had – and maybe that was what made it so hard. She'd known it was a mistake the moment she'd opened her mouth – trying to force Sasuke into a corner never worked out well – but she'd been unable to keep quiet a moment longer. Even if he pushed her away she wanted him to know how she felt. So, despite knowing the danger of the action, she'd offered her heart to Sasuke again …

The bitter twist of her lips wasn't missed by the boy beside her and Sai's eyes narrowed. Lately Sakura had been … strange, to say the least. Ever since Sasuke, in fact. He carefully schooled his features so the slight smile didn't shift in the least but he continued carefully watching Sakura's expression. She thought he didn't know about her little arrangement with the Uchiha; she was wrong. Sakura had never been a very good liar and Sai wasn't in the habit of losing control to the extent that he wouldn't notice what marks his fingers and mouth left on her fair skin. After the third unexplained love-bite on her shoulder he'd done the only thing that made sense: he'd followed her on her vaguely dismissed disappearances. But, the last few weeks he'd noticed a marked absence of any bruises that he himself didn't inflict; she no longer disappeared for unexplained periods of time. And she was unhappier than he ever remembered seeing her before. She'd lost the sparkle she'd begun to regain …

They reached the door but Sai's attention never wavered from Sakura's slight frown, the small tremble of her lower lip …

"Sa-Sasuke."

It was her gasp, the way she froze suddenly, their linked hands yanking him to a corresponding halt, that forced Sai to lift his eyes.

His gaze met the Uchiha's, and the artist in him couldn't help but notice in surprise that the Uchiha's eyes were actually gray … such a dark gray that the iris appeared almost indistinguishable from the obsidian pupils … Sai blinked. Had he imagined it or had it really seemed as if a, for a split-second, dark flames flashed in the Uchiha's gaze as they glared at each other?

But as soon as the thought appeared all emotion had drained from the Uchiha's eyes.

"Hn," the Uchiha muttered.

Sai's eyebrows rose; he couldn't have stopped himself from responding to that if he wanted to.

"Good to see your vocabulary is still just as ridiculous as your hair," Sai smirked at the surprise, quickly replaced with fury, that flashed through the Uchiha's eyes.

"Sai!" Sakura hissed, tugging at his hand in protest, shooting a fearful look in Sasuke's direction.

For a moment, it did look as if Sasuke was seriously considering inflicting as much bodily harm as he could, but then his fingers curled into fists that he quickly stuffed into the pockets of his jeans. With one last indecipherable look in Sakura's direction the Uchiha turned on his heel and quickly strode away.

And Sai didn't miss the slight film of moisture that brightened Sakura's eyes as she stared after Sasuke.

* * *

The front door slammed closed behind him with a satisfying thud; but still Sasuke couldn't quite help but wish that he could slam his fist into Sai's face. The crunch of the idiot's nose breaking would make a much more satisfying sound…

Sasuke gritted his teeth and stalked toward the stairs – there was no way that this day could get any worse. After the disaster at the mall he'd completely given up on buying anything, he'd merely gotten the hell out of the place as quick as he could. The aimless drive had eventually led him to Tenten's; in the last few months it had become habit to check up on her once every few days. Strange as it was, they'd somehow become … friends … for lack of a better word and nowadays he checked up on her more to annoy her than because of any promises he'd made. But today even annoying Tenten had lost its appeal and he'd not stayed much past an hour. Listening to Tenten gush about every little nuance in Neji's latest letter wasn't doing much for his temper, so he'd decided that maybe today would be best spent on his own.

He was only halfway up the stairs when the knock sounded at the front door. His hand clenched around the banister as Sasuke fought for calm. A couple of deep breaths allowed him some semblance of control and he quickly walked to the front door and yanked it open with a snarl on his lips.

"Wha-″ Sasuke never finished the demand.

Sai stood on the doorstep smiling vacantly at him and thankfully Sasuke regained control of his vocal chords.

"What the fuck do you want?"

The smile never wavered and the urge to wipe it off became almost a need … Sasuke gritted his teeth.

"Let me in. We need to talk."

Sai's voice was serious, at odds with his idiotic expression but Sasuke was still too incensed to really care about the strange inflection in the other's voice.

"I have nothing to say to you," Sasuke muttered the words, already closing the door on the bastard before he completely lost his cool. He was finding it hard to keep from imagining the idiot in front of him running his hands all over Sakura …

As if Sai could hear his thoughts the ridiculous smile disappeared and the dark eyes trained steadily on his turned serious.

"It's about Sakura."

Slowly, unwillingly, Sasuke stood back; allowed Sai past him and into the foyer. He tried to ignore the faint scent of Sakura's perfume that lingered in the air around Sai and merely waved a hand to indicate that Sai should precede him into the living room.

They settled as far away from each other as they could manage, a fact that Sasuke was inordinately grateful for when the first words out of the pale boy's mouth was:

"I see your hospitality also matches your personality; that is, it's non-existent."

"Say what you have to say and then get the fuck out," Sasuke managed to respond through gritted teeth; vaguely wondering why on earth he was letting Sai bother him so much. He hadn't really expected Sakura to come clean about their little arrangement but now that Sai was here he would listen to the usual threats to stay away and then the idiot could be on his way and Sasuke could go about restoring his equilibrium.

The silence stretched interminably but Sasuke was damned if he'd be the first one to break it; instead he trained his gaze on Sai – and refused to look away.

"You don't deserve her, you know. What she sees in you no one will ever be able to understand."

Without giving Sai a chance to finish what he'd started to say Sasuke lashed out – the last thing he needed was this idiot lecturing him.

"Yeah? I can tell you what she sees in you: nothing more than my replacement."

For a moment Sai was silent but then that annoying smile pulled at his lips as he leaned back in his seat.

"Exactly," he nodded.

Slowly Sasuke shook his head, disbelief painted on his features, he hadn't expected that. Watching the other warily he waited in silence for whatever was to come.

Sai leaned forward, linking his fingers together and resting his elbows on his spread knees.

"And that's the whole point, Sasuke. Unfathomable as it may be, she loves you. Ever since your little arrangement ended she's been unhappy."

An eyebrow was arched at Sasuke who steeled himself for the tirade that was sure to follow – jealous boyfriends were all the same – but found himself being wrong-footed again when the other boy simply shrugged.

"So. She loves you – and if your actions are anything to go by then you love her too."

Sasuke opened his mouth to protest – no way in hell would he let Sai of all people into the darkest, most hidden secrets of his heart but Sai held up a hand to forestall the protests.

"I'm not an idiot, Uchiha. I get it – probably better than you do. You broke her heart but she still loves you; you treat her badly but she still loves you. You're a selfish bastard on your best days but she doesn't care. And she's able to get under your skin like no one else – you've never quite managed to let her go; never quite managed to leave her alone. So, stop the girly angsting and just tell her how you feel. You'll both be happier for it. No matter what I say or do I won't ever be able to make her forget you – no man will. You're the only one she really wants. So deal with it."

Leaving a gaping Sasuke staring after him – and quite enjoying the fact that he'd been able to reduce the Uchiha to a spluttering mass of confusion – Sai let himself out. He thought he'd gotten the point across quite well.

* * *

Neji stared intently at his bags piled in readiness by the door. Hiashi should be there soon and much as he had dreamed about this day, now that it had finally arrived he wasn't sure if he was ready to leave the center. Seeing Tenten again had been all that had kept him going some days; some days he'd simply sat re-reading her letters over and over in an effort to feel close to her. In some ways she was still part of his old life – a life he'd fought tooth and nail to get out of. Every stumbling step towards sanity that he'd taken had been for her and now he was scared.

What if she realized in the intervening months how much better she was without him? Neji had never believed in deluding himself and though he'd managed to kick the drug habit, though he'd found things about himself he'd never have believed, he was still intrinsically the same. He was never going to be a nice person; he'd learned consideration but it hadn't lessened his natural arrogance and Neji knew better than to try and change what he couldn't. He would never be _good_ enough for her … that was simply a fact.

The knock at his door startled him out of his thoughts and he took a deep breath before rising from the bed to answer the door. He'd also never been a coward and he had no intention of starting now.

* * *

Sakura stared in disbelief at the uncomfortable Uchiha hovering on her doorstep; one hand braced on the wall next to the door, the light shining on his dark head as he kept his gaze firmly fixed on the floor. She had no idea what to say or do … the last time she'd seen him he'd stormed away from them in the mall after Sai's insults and that had been nearly a two days ago. Two days ago everything had been normal, then they'd run into Sasuke at the mall and Sai had gone strange on her. She'd still been mulling over what she could possibly have done when Sai had shown up yesterday, unexpected and uninvited. He'd barely been in the hallway with the door closed behind him before he'd told her, quietly but firmly, that he had no intention of being a Sasuke replacement and that they both deserved better than that. She'd been too shocked to really respond and Sai had left quickly after. Now another uninvited guest had presented himself and she had the sinking feeling that she did not want to know what Sasuke had to say. Silently she waited for him to make the first move.

"Come with me," he demanded softly, staring intently into her eyes.

Hesitantly Sakura took his outstretched hand, wondering if she was making the mistake of her life but he was quiet as he led her down the path and toward his car. He didn't say a word as he held the passenger door open for her; remained silent all the way to the park.

Sakura stared around her in confusion; it was getting late – the sun had set hours ago and he wanted to go for a walk through the dark park? He'd always loved the park, of course, whenever he needed to think it had been his first choice for a place to go … but she couldn't understand why whatever he had to say had to be said here …

As if he'd read her thoughts Sasuke jerked his head and gave her a small, reassuring smile. Shrugging Sakura followed his lead and got out of the car.

He took her hand and refused to let go all the way to the brightly lit fountain in the middle of the grassy expanse and Sakura's confusion mounted; she had no idea what was going on, couldn't stop her heart from pounding in her ears.

The sound of water was the only thing anchoring her; the only indication of reality. The soft glow of the lamps, high overhead, left them mostly shrouded in darkness and the lack of other people made it feel far too intimate for Sakura's liking. She nearly laughed out loud at the thought of Sasuke and intimacy … that just didn't happen. Sasuke was an unfeeling block of ice; she'd offered him her already bruised and trampled heart a second time and he hadn't even bothered to respond, he'd merely told her that their arrangement was at an end … but that line of thinking didn't work either because all it served to do was to remind her of his arms around her, his lips on hers …

Sakura shook her head violently and pulled her hand out of his grasp; took a couple of steps back for good measure as well.

"Why did you bring me here, Sasuke? What do you want?"

Slowly Sasuke turned until they were face-to-face, he reclaimed the two strides she'd taken and then his hand was hesitantly cupping her cheek.

"I'm sorry."

The words were so low she nearly missed them in the blanketing darkness. Before she had a chance to voice her confusion Sasuke continued, the words gaining strength with every syllable he uttered.

"I'm sorry I treated you so badly. I made many mistakes … I was young and stupid, Sak. I didn't know what I had until it was gone. And then I went on to make even more mistakes – every time I tried to convince myself that the next willing body would be the one that could finally supplant you; make me forget you – but that didn't work. Then you told me that you were mine but I still didn't really believe it. I couldn't allow myself to."

He took a deep breath, his thumbs brushing slowly at the tears that spilled silently down her cheeks.

"Don't cry. Please," he whispered but Sakura merely shook her head and so he continued, "I saw you with Sai, he'd taken you for some ice-cream and it's the single most ridiculous fucking thing ever but I wanted to be able to do that. I wanted to be the one you smiled at because I did something stupid that made you happy."

His hands slowly slid from their place, trailing down her cheeks, her neck, over her shoulders and arms until their fingers tangled together before he slowly withdrew; took a step back, then another.

"I never really had you. You're not mine. But you have me."

Suddenly unsure, Sasuke looked away and even in the dim light Sakura could see the blush that rose to tint his cheeks with color. And that small, uncharacteristic gesture, more than anything, convinced Sakura that this was real; that it wasn't some silly dream. The tears continued to flow relentlessly and she wasn't sure if she was crying because she was happy or for all the time they'd lost, all the unhappiness they'd caused each other…

Slowly, step by step, she walked closer, lifted her hand to rest on his chest and spoke quietly, keeping her head bowed.

"I love you too, Sasuke."

She buried her face in his chest, suddenly too scared to look at him, afraid that he'd realized he'd made a mistake, scared she'd misunderstood his apology… but slowly, his arms tightened around her and, for the first time in years, Sakura felt as if she'd come home.

* * *

Neji took a deep breath. He'd been hovering a block away from Tenten's house for over an hour now.

What if she wasn't happy to see him? What if Sasuke had taken care of her in a more intimate way than Neji had asked of him? Her letters had certainly mentioned him frequently enough. Not for the first time Neji cursed quietly under his breath as he ran his fingers through already dishevelled chocolate locks. He hated this, hated feeling unsure … but a part of him still couldn't quite believe that after everything he'd put her through she would still want to be with him.

The moon shone so brightly the stars were only tiny specks of brightness in the velvet sky but the great expanse of blackness above calmed him. As always it made him realize the futility of his existence … how unimportant he really was … but Tenten … she made him something better, made him believe in something better and suddenly he realized that whether she wanted to see him or not was beside the point. He wanted to see her. Had to see her.

Once the decision had been made it was suddenly easy to put the car into gear, to drive the ridiculously small distance, to park in the street in front of her house. It took nothing to open the door, it wasn't difficult to walk up the path or to ring the doorbell … but then her voice sounded, hollow and echoing from deep inside the house and his courage deserted him. What if it only took one look at her to plunge him back into chaos?

But it was too late, the lock was clicking and the doorknob turned, and much too suddenly the door was opened. Bright yellowed light pooled out of the house, slid onto the welcome mat in a buttery puddle, and Neji couldn't help but stare.

She looked beautiful in her sweatpants and her oversized t-shirt with her hair up in twin buns … her eyes wide with surprise … but it was the look they contained that had his heart soaring.

One by one the emotions flashed through the expressive chocolate of her irises: surprised followed by immediate joy, small flashes of pain mixed with bubbling excitement. Her hand clenched around the doorjamb and her mouth opened though no words emerged. But she was staring at him with her heart in her eyes and sudden peace settled over his soul and Neji knew that everything would be alright.

"Hello, Tenten."

Then she was in his arms, crying and laughing, though she refused to let go of him for even a second, and when their lips met slowly, both of them uncertain after all this time, Neji realized with a blinding flash of clarity that, with Tenten, love really was unconditional.

Finally, they could have forever.

* * *

_**A/n: So, epilogue anyone? –big grin- Let me know if you want one! Now, review! –makes puppy eyes-**_


	28. Chapter 28

_**A/n: Where the hell have I been xD? Seriously, I had a very hard time getting this down on paper … and I hope you'll all be somewhat satisfied with the result ^^" Thank you so very much for the amazing response on the final chapter! That being said, I'd like to dedicate this chapter to all the people in Japan after their recent tragedy, with the hope that happier times will come for them soon.**_

_**Warnings: do I really have to say it?**_

_**Disclaimer: Disclaimed**_

* * *

_**Epilogue**_

Tenten loved days like this. Days when the sun shone in a crystal blue sky; when only a slight breeze ruffled the leaves high overhead and the air seemed to caress her skin, days that stretched lazily ahead of her. But today was special.

Neji waited at the end of it.

She couldn't help the smile lifting the corners of her mouth as she danced lightly over the tiles and into her bathroom. The forced separation of the last few years had been sheer torture at times. College had not turned out to be anything at all like the movies; instead of parties she'd spent most of her time at the library. The few parties she had attended had been spent missing Neji, and though she loved that their relationship had remained as strong as ever despite attending different colleges, part of her couldn't help but wonder occasionally if she'd made a mistake in not changing her course so she could have gone with Neji. But every vacation, as soon as Neji's arms had folded around her and she'd breathed that secret sigh of relief at finally having the near-constant ache of loss assuaged, she'd realized anew that perhaps attending separate colleges had been the best thing they could've done. The biggest surprise had been how secure she'd felt; never once doubting his loyalty or his resolve, never questioning discreetly to find out if old habits had died hard in the end. But the truth was that the time for doubts had been long past. The moment he'd shown up on her doorstep all those years ago, the haggard shadows cause by the rehabilitation center still haunting his pearly eyes, she'd known. In her heart, she'd known that nothing would ever be able to keep them apart again.

The bath water was running smoothly by this time, the temperature just right, but Tenten was too lost in her thoughts to pay it much mind. Her previous anticipation of a long, relaxing soak had become subsumed by memories and she didn't even notice the wry twist to her lips as she watched the past unfold.

Her parents had been harder to win around; Hyuuga Hiashi even more so. The fact remained that, to parental vision, they appeared to have done each other far more harm than good. Still, in the end, they'd simply gritted their teeth and pushed through it and in time, when it became apparent that neither Neji nor Tenten had any intention of ending their relationship, their parents had backed down and accepted the status quo.

She absentmindedly turned off the taps, trying to ignore the butterflies in her stomach. Today was about beginnings; it would be the first time she'd see Neji since getting home the day before (he wouldn't arrive until the afternoon); the first time they'd see each other after graduating. Despite everything they'd been through, despite the knowledge that Neji loved her, some part of Tenten – the young girl lost in darkness – couldn't help but wonder anxiously what the future would bring. Her mouth firmed as she pressed it into a thin line and, shaking her head defiantly, Tenten lowered herself into the scented water with a sigh of pure bliss.

It didn't bear thinking about.

Whatever the future brought they would face it together and that was all there was to it.

* * *

The silk of the dress felt wonderful against her skin. Tenten twirled once more in front of the full-length mirror admiring the way the skirt flared out around her knees. The ice-blue color suited her, the length and the neckline were situated so she felt comfortable; the skirt ended just at her knees and the neckline showed only a hint of cleavage. She still felt like crawling under a rock when she recalled the barely-there skirts and dresses Sasuke had dressed her in years before. But this … this was stylish, classy – and most importantly it was _Tenten_.

With a sigh she turned away from the mirror, searching for the matching silver sandals on her floor, she didn't know why she was so worried about her appearance. No matter what she wore Neji had a standard compliment and tonight would be no different. She shook her head, a dry chuckle falling from her lips, as she bent to gather her wrap and clutch bag. She'd never admit it to him but the fact that he always said she looked beautiful no matter what she wore soothed her. It was such a fixture that it made her feel safe.

The doorbell rang and Tenten quickly patted her hair, making sure that all the bothersome curls were where they should be; either piled on her head or cascading down her shoulders, and quickly headed for the door with one last glance sweeping the room to make sure nothing had been forgotten. The walk down the stairs seemed interminable; it was the oddest thing … every time they saw each other after a separation the moments before she opened the door were the hardest to bear. As if all the months of loneliness came crashing down on her all at once and she couldn't get close to him quick enough.

But then he was there, and he was beautiful … he was _Neji_.

And that was all she would ever want.

* * *

The party was a success as far as Tenten could tell. The flower arrangements had been beautiful, the food delicious, and the delicate decorations spoke of Hinata's equally delicate touch. Tenten didn't envy her friend the lime-light at occasions like this – but Hinata was a Hyuuga and they seemed to take the necessity for ridiculously fancy graduation parties in stride; Neji had certainly appeared unfazed.

She sighed happily – more a deep breath than anything else – as she leaned back into her chair (a surprisingly comfortable piece of furniture considering all the polished wood involved) and allowed her gaze to sweep around the large room. Hinata stood at the edge of the terrace, drink in hand, blushing prettily as Naruto flirted outrageously. Sasuke looked like he'd rather be anywhere else than watching his best friend make a fool of himself over a pretty girl and Tenten filed the information away to tease him about later.

Sakura and Ino were just returning from the bathroom and the warm glow in the pit of Tenten's stomach seemed to expand when she saw the way the Uchiha's eyes lingered on her pink-haired friend. The knowledge that the storms had been weathered and that they'd all emerged, if not unscathed, then certainly stronger, made pride burn in her heart and for a moment Tenten was fiercely thankful that she had all these people in her life. After everything that had happened they all knew the others' worst secrets, the darkest parts of their souls … and yet they were all still here.

"Hey, dreamer."

Temari's voice snapped Tenten out of her reverie and she sent an embarrassed grin in her friend's direction. More than anything she was thankful for Temari's support – at times it had been the only thing that had gotten her out of bed in the mornings. That, and the knowledge that the blonde was quite capable of yanking her out the door and to class wearing her pyjamas if Tenten failed to show up for their ritual cup of coffee before classes started for the day.

"How does it feel to be a college graduate?" Tenten asked, teasingly, trying to mask the sudden wave of melancholy.

Her friend shrugged dismissively, "Exactly the same as being a college student. Shika still drives me crazy because he's too lazy to put his dirty laundry in the hamper, the paper's still giving me the most ridiculous fluff pieces to write …" her voice trailed off and her eyes narrowed as she stared intently at Tenten before a softer smile lit her features and she reached over to tug one of the curls laying over the dark-haired girl's shoulder, "and you're still in Neji-dreamland most of the time."

The smile took the sting out of the words and Tenten returned it, grateful that Temari occasionally had the good sense to not comment on something.

"Speaking of…" Temari jerked her head at something behind Tenten.

The words had barely fallen from Temari's lips when Tenten felt the familiar tingle at the nape of her neck signalling Neji's approach. She smiled at her friend who shoo'ed her out of her seat and then Neji was waiting for her, a strangely intent light in his eyes. But Tenten blinked a few times, more to still the uneasy fluttering in her stomach than because she had something in her eye, but then it was gone and she firmly told herself that she was imagining things.

He waited patiently for her, as she wound her way through groups of people, and when she was close enough held out his hand in silent question. Without hesitation Tenten placed her hand in his, a slight shiver chasing down her spine when his warm, tapered fingers enveloped her smaller hand.

Their stride was unhurried, as they made their way outside. Tenten stopping to offer greetings here and there while Neji nodded his acknowledgement. The moon was high in the sky when they finally reached the quiet gardens. Outdoor lanterns and torches were lit; some trees wound with small, white lights and Tenten followed unresistingly after Neji as he pulled her deeper into the garden. They stepped onto the pebbled path and Neji immediately let go of her right hand, his palm coming to rest on the small of her back as he guided her over the rougher spots.

The stars were bright, easily visible, and Tenten craned her neck back to stare at their distant sparkle, allowing Neji to guide the placement of her feet as the buttery, yellow light from the party faded along with the voices from the guests. They didn't speak, they didn't need to, and Tenten enjoyed the silence along with the peace of the night.

Her left hand brushed against a twig, gaining her a brand-new scratch and Tenten jumped slightly at the sting. Neji immediately stopped and reached for her hand though she tried to push him away. After a minute of silent, stubborn fighting on Tenten's part and equally quiet glaring on Neji's he had her hand in his and Tenten sighed as she gave up the fight and allowed him to examine her skin by the light of the moon. A rustling caught her gaze and Tenten stared in rapt fascination as a nightingale lighted onto a nearby branch. She opened her mouth to point it out to Neji but before his name could emerge the touch of cold metal on her ring-finger froze her into place. Slowly she stared at Neji's mostly shadow-shrouded form but then he was gone, walking ahead slowly as if nothing had happened and Tenten shook her head in confusion.

She took a deep, trembling breath and glanced down at her left-hand, sure she was dreaming, but the light of the moon and the stars caught the cold sparkle of the diamond and suddenly its light seemed to blaze brighter than the sun, nevermind the moon. Shocked disbelief kept her frozen to the spot, staring at her hand, but it wasn't the deep kind of icy shock that numbed down to the soul. This was more of an anticipatory shock … the kind that was already giving way to spreading warmth, deep, deep thankfulness and an overwhelming surge of emotion.

Slowly, Tenten raised her head, stared ahead of her to where Neji had come to a halt a few meters away. Even in the moonlight she could make out the intent light from earlier in his eyes and sudden tears welled up in hers when she noted the tenseness of his stance, the rigidity of his muscles. Expressing emotions in words had never been easy for him; even now Neji rarely told her he loved her, making the words all the more precious to hear.

Without words, because it was easier for Neji that way, she walked up to him, stood on tip-toe and pressed a kiss to his lips.

"Yes," Tenten whispered against his mouth, nearly laughing at the way he relaxed against her allowing his hands to come to rest on her hips. That he would doubt her after all this time …

She stepped back and slipped her hand back into his, drawing him along deeper into the grove of trees with a light laugh.

* * *

_**A/N: For the final time … review? Pretty please?**_

_**Thank you to all and good night! ^^**_


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